return to peace

At the beginning of the new year, there is heavy snow.The surface of the lake on the outskirts of Qucheng was frozen, and the trees on both sides of the lake showed bare branches. The wind was not strong, but it was cold to the bone.The winter sun is extraordinarily bright, and the space between the sky and the earth is emptied.

Holding a bamboo bone umbrella, Chen Lingshang stood quietly at the head of the bridge. Today is the day he and Ji Fan agreed on.He was wearing a white gilt robe and a fox fur cloak, his clear face was slightly reddish after being blown by the wind for a long time.

Ji Fan hasn't come yet.

"Young Master, General Ji may be delayed by something, you should go back first, I will wait here." Lin Feng who was behind couldn't see it, and said proactively.

Chu Lingshang shook his head, on such an important day, even if something big happened, Ji Fan couldn't be stopped.Unless, he didn't want to come.

He is still stubbornly guarding, waiting for the final outcome.

The heavy snow did not stop, thick white snow accumulated on the umbrella, and the last ray of light in the sky disappeared, Ji Fan was still in the future.Chen Lingshang raised his head, looked at the flying snow all over the sky, and said softly, "Let's go."

What a weariness and disappointment that was.

Chu Lingshang stood in the wind and snow all day, feeling a little dazed, his hands, feet and cheeks were numb, and he couldn't laugh or cry.He was walking a little stiffly, a little staggering, Lin Feng stepped forward to help him worriedly, but he pushed him away lightly but uncompromisingly, and continued to walk forward slowly alone.

Lin Feng just watched him staggering forward, walking, and fell down without warning.

"Son!"

After he brought him back, Chu Lingshang was already unconscious, his whole body was burning badly, and his forehead was hot.The imperial doctor was immediately summoned from the palace, and Chu Zexi also hurried over.After a lot of tossing, he finally stabilized his condition.

Chu Zexi drove everyone away, and quietly accompanied Chu Lingshang alone.He took off the hot brocade handkerchief on his forehead, re-soaked it in cold water, and put it on.Looking at Chu Lingshang's pale and weak appearance, he couldn't stop the pain in his heart. He took his weak hand and pressed it to his cheek.He thought, long-term pain is worse than short-term pain, this is the best choice.Yes, he knows why Chu Lingshang is like this today, and he also understands that in the future, if Chu Lingshang knows the truth, he will hate himself, but he will not let him know, only in this way can he have a chance!

A long time ago, he secretly contacted the Third Prince Chen and leaked some obscure information to him, making him suspicious of Ji Fan.That child is the remnant of the Fang family, if Chen Jingxuan knew about it, how could he not hold grudges.Today, he told him about Ji Fan's appointment with Chu Lingshang again, how could he let Ji Fan go to the appointment.Whether Ji Fan lives or dies has nothing to do with him, what he wants is to make Chu Lingshang completely give up, so that he can have a chance.

He thought to himself, when, when did he become such a villain.

In the middle of the night, Chen Lingshang's temperature dropped a little.Because there was still morning court the next day, Chu Zexi set off to return to the palace.As soon as he opened the door, he saw Lin Feng guarding the door.Lin Feng's face was paler than the snow outside.

"Take good care of him, and report to the widow in time if there is any situation."

"Yes, Your Majesty."

At noon the next day, Chu Lingshang woke up.After waking up, he took medicine and ate meals on time, and he responded to others talking to him. During the period, Chu Zexi came to see him, and he answered everything he asked, as if he was no different from ordinary people.But if you observe carefully, you will find that there is no vitality in him, no expression, no emotions, even Chu Wuyou can't arouse his interest.He goes to bed very early every day, but often sleeps until midnight, wakes up with a start, and then keeps his eyes open until dawn.

Three days later, he asked about Ji Fan's news for the first time: "Where is he now?" Because of illness, his voice was a little hoarse.

Lin Feng couldn't bear to look at him, he lowered his head and replied, "The spies report back, General Ji is in Qucheng."

"Then why didn't he come to see me?" Chen Lingshang asked calmly, but his eyes were red.

Lin Feng didn't know what to say, so he remained silent.

"Prepare the car." Chu Lingshang got out of bed, took the clothes beside the bed, and said as he put them on, he didn't take two steps, his feet went limp.

Lin Feng quickly supported him, and persuaded: "Young master, your illness is still not cured, you should write a letter to General Ji."

"Prepare the car!"

Lin Feng had never seen Chu Lingshang lose his composure so desperately.After being stunned for a moment, he hurriedly gave orders.

Chu Lingshang supported the chair and sat down, raised his head, covered his face with his hands, trying to force back his weakness.He believed in him and would not break the agreement for no reason, so he must ask him face to face and ask him what he thinks!

Qucheng is the city at the junction of the two countries, and Chen State and Xiliang each occupy half.Chen Guo occupied the east city, and Xiliang occupied the west city.Because of the signing of the ten-year peace treaty, the restrictions on the gates in the east and west cities were relaxed, so it was easy for Chu Lingshang to arrive at the Qucheng county government.

The county magistrate welcomed him in with a flattering face, and waited in the flower hall.Chu Lingshang asked Lin Feng to wait outside, and waited alone. He was a little nervous, wanting to see Ji Fan, but also a little afraid of seeing him. What if, what if he just didn't want to be with him anymore?He didn't dare to think about it anymore, every moment felt like sitting on pins and needles, it was very tormenting.

As soon as Ji Fan entered the flower hall, he saw Chu Lingshang's pale and weak face.He was wearing white clothes and a dark red cape, and his lips were even more bloodless.Chu Lingshang looked straight at him with hurt eyes, and he clenched his fists secretly, restraining his urge to hug him.

He knew that Chen Jingxuan was watching from behind.Once he acted rashly, his mother and Chu Lingshang's lives would be lost.He pretended to be expressionless and indifferent, but his heart was bleeding.Nothing can hurt him, only his disappointment makes his heart ache unbearably.

That day, Chu Lingshang stood in the wind and snow, waiting for him all day.He also watched him for a day from a nearby watchtower.How much he wanted to tell him that he was here and that he had come to see him, but his mother's life was in his hands, so he could only look at him, bit by bit, completely disappointed.The moment he fell to the ground, he was about to rush out. Chen Jingxuan held him back. For the first time, he felt the cruelty of fate. He waited for more than ten years before he returned to his side, but now, He wants to push him away step by step.

He hated the leaker, Chen Jingxuan, and himself even more.However, he couldn't escape.

Chu Lingshang watched him approaching step by step in a daze, so familiar yet so unfamiliar, he couldn't see a trace of warmth and love on his face, as if he was a stranger.

"You, why didn't you come that day?" He was a proud person, and the inherent pride in his bones made him unwilling to bow his head in front of anything.But this time, he gave in, he abandoned his self-esteem, and finally asked this humble sentence.

"elder brother……"

As soon as these two words came out, Chu Lingshang's heart became cold.The title that was once so intimate has now become the word that hurt him the most.

"I thought about it carefully, and I still want to stay in Chen Guo. I occupy a high position in Chen Guo and have a great future. A man's ambition is everywhere, and he can't be limited by the love of his son and daughter."

"In Xiliang, you can also have a great future."

"However, I don't want to abandon my mother country, and I don't want to be cast aside by the world. I think you can understand."

Chu Lingshang felt that he might not know the person in front of him. He couldn't believe it: "Understood? Did you lie to me before? Do you have any difficulties? Tell me, and we can find a solution together."

Ji Fan's heart skipped a beat, and he wanted to tell him the truth.He pinched his palm and warned himself that now is not the time.

"I didn't lie to you, I just changed my mind now."

He dragged him from above the clouds into the world of mortals, and now told him that he had changed his mind.Despair welled up in his heart, and he suddenly felt that he was a fool.Can't you see it from the previous contradiction?Can't you tell from his insincere letters?Why, why did he still believe him.

He fell off the cliff again, but this time, he was pushed down by the person he loved the most.He couldn't hold it back, his eyes were red, tears were rolling, he was still sick, he dragged his weak body to find him, with a little luck, it turned out that this was the end, he felt wronged, but this time no one To be able to support him, he must be strong.

He forced a smile and said, "I see, I'll just ask the last question, you... have you really loved me?"

"Love, from beginning to end, always love." Ji Fan shouted in his heart, but he couldn't say it out.

"Perhaps. Family, love, and friendship may really be indistinguishable. I was the one who wanted to be by your side at the beginning, but now I am the one who regrets it. I dare not face you because of such dishonesty. You know, We get together less and leave more, I feel very hard and tired, I don’t want to continue anymore.”

These words were so heartless and righteous that Chu Lingshang completely gave up.He remembered that when Si Ran asked him if he could tell the difference between love and family affection, now that he could tell the difference, Ji Fan told him that he couldn't tell the difference.Oh, what an irony.

After a long time, he said with a hoarse voice, "Okay, this is your choice, and I respect you." He looked up at him, and he was still as tall and straight as a bamboo, and as handsome as ever, but he was no longer his. It's Ji Fan. "General Ji, from now on, you and I will have nothing to do with each other. See you on the battlefield, I will not show mercy."

After all, he got up and walked out slowly, never looking back.

Behind him, Ji Fan burst into tears, and bit his hand to keep himself from crying.In the hazy vision, Chen Lingshang gradually drifted away.

19 years later, they separated again.