[Tuyan] Yimu

#after many years#

An Yan:

I am writing this short letter on the plane, and I will not be able to contact you for a long time afterwards, and I will not even be able to pick up a pen.

Sorry, I broke up without warning.I want to look you in the eyes and say sorry.

I was terrified, the same terrified I was when I watched my family members being taken away as a child, and I was terrified of losing everything again.I didn't even dare to turn my head, I was afraid that I would see your sad expression when I turned my head, and I couldn't make up my mind to stay away, but I had to do it again.

sorry.I hurt you with the most sensitive reasons for us to start what I had to do.

I said that I would stand with you in the eyes of the world, but I betrayed my promise.How will you suffer in the future?I can only feel a little more at ease if I make myself suffer twice as much.

Before I left, it snowed, and I was worried that you would be cold.Remember to add a quilt at night, don't freeze.

I can no longer take care of you.

Shentu

#after many years#

An Yan:

From the time Sue called me, it never came back.I made a high-profile announcement in the association that bringing Su Zhi back was to protect her, and this was the first step of the whole plan.But what will you think of me?

I am a traitor, a selfish person.A person who lives on a meager life, gave up his feelings for the so-called opinions of others, and left your side.You can blame me all you want, I totally accept it.

Su used his own death to give me and Su Zhi a crazy start.No one is going to think that the person who planned this whole thing is still sane, but the plan protects you and everyone else, and I'd rather you know nothing about it.I'd rather you think I'm a bad person and stay away from me.This frees you from the surveillance of Yingsanjia, which makes me more assured of your safety.

Soon after, Su Zhi and I will talk about holding a wedding.

I don't think you should show up.If you bless me at my wedding, I'll feel like I'm in hell.

Shentu

An Yan:

I had to write another immediately after the last one.I imagined a wedding scene, and if you came, I would kiss another person in front of you.I couldn't do it at all, just this one scene made me sick, and terribly self-loathing.I can't play it.

This is a play, a play that must be performed perfectly, a play that even you have to lie to.

I never imagined that one day I would push myself to the brink of madness too.I have always been calm and indifferent to everything.At this moment, none of the mind-cleaning techniques I have learned is working, I just feel tormented, and the pain is unbearable.I want you to listen to me and get this over with.

Yet I cannot extricate myself from it.If the truth comes out and you choose to forgive me, should I let you carry out this plan with me?

No, the moment you know the truth, you are in danger and the plan is exposed.Not only will you be in danger, but Su Zhi will also be in danger. Once something happens to her, we will have no bargaining chips against Yingsanjia, and we will lose everything.

I calmed down and regained my sanity.If I want to protect you, I must deceive you too.The wedding must go on without any mistakes.

Actually you should come.You should look at me and Su Zhi pretending to be very happy, and then be completely disappointed in me.You are the one who should leave a dangerous person like me and live the simplest life.If you forget me about it and start a family of your own someday...

I hope that your wife and children will erase the pain I caused you.

I will hold my guilt for you and bless it all.

Shentu

Today is a wedding.you didn't come.

Lao Zhang said that you have something to do so you can only ask them to convey your congratulations.I dare not ask any more about you, if I act unduly caring it will arouse suspicion.

I love you.

Shentu