what is your vision

If it is said that drinking too much on the day of the Lantern Festival caused a mistake in judgment, Zhou Yanchuan further noticed in the next few days that his bad premonition was becoming a reality.

He is no longer a young man who just fell in love, and this is not the first time he has experienced that feeling. Even if he is a little more rational now, he still can't get rid of the changes that have already begun and are ongoing in his emotions.

Initially, this change was like a few bubbles popping up on the water surface. After heating for a period of time, the bubbles gushed out one after another, becoming denser and expanding until they boiled and could no longer be ignored.

He recalled one thing, when he thought that Lu Yunchu was interested in him, he discussed with Mo Ziyang, but Mo Ziyang thought he was talking about a girl and suggested him to try.

His first reaction was not 'I can't have feelings for him', but 'Lu Yunchu is a man'.What holds them back is orientation and gender issues.

Does this mean that once this confusing premise is removed, it is entirely possible for him to consider interacting with the other party?

But how could he not care about orientation?Is homosexuality contagious?

Zhou Yanchuan hopes to have a machine capable of monitoring people's hearts, so that he can be freed from this difficult-to-generalize thoughts.

What happened to him, if there is an absolute authority who can help him determine, you just fell in love with a man, you just changed, okay, then he accepts his fate.

But now, no power can tell or help him analyze these, he has to judge by himself.

He put the pair of "fat dolls" sent by Lu Yunchu on the sideboard, and when he was alone at home, he occasionally stared at the dolls in a daze.

A week after the reception, I met Lu Yunchu several times during the period, and he made a final determination of his mentality.

Don't you just like a man?Lu Yunchu still likes men, this alone is cause for joy.

Immediately after he thought of the oolong caused by the album, he couldn't be happy.

It would be nice if the last misunderstanding was true.

But Lu Yunchu said a word: "You are not my type."

Zhou Yanchuan's first relationship was started by Liu Qingru's confession of his heart. Strictly speaking, he has no experience in pursuing another person, how to match what he likes, how to cultivate a relationship... his mind is blank.He didn't even know what type of person Lu Yunchu liked.

Could it be Chen Mingxuan?

If so, unless he was reincarnated, he would not be able to satisfy the other party's interest anyway.

But Zhou Yanchuan didn't want to deliberately cater to Lu Yunchu's preferences, he hoped that the other party would accept the truest self, not a distorted and pretended empty shell.

Just like he can see clearly all the qualities that are different from his own in that person, and carefully maintain them.

After figuring this out, the hesitation in his heart almost subsided.

Big deal they can always be friends.

There was no suitable breakthrough in emotional matters, Zhou Yanchuan devoted more energy to work, and began to do some things that he didn't worry about on weekdays by himself.The assistant almost thought that he was dissatisfied with him, so he asked one more question, and he was relieved after getting a negative answer.

In recent afternoons, he didn't leave the unit until around six o'clock, and this Thursday was no exception.

The days in March are a little longer, and it is still bright in the evening, showing a cool blue color.He was about to drive out of the gate of the park when he was stopped by security guards.

"What's the matter?" Zhou Yanchuan lowered the car window and poked his head.

"Mr. Zhou, there is an old man who has been waiting for you for a long time."

The security guard said that the old man only gave Zhou Yanchuan's name and asked him if he was working here; asked her to register as a visitor but said no, and refused to ask her to rest in the security room, and kept sitting in the flower bed outside.

"Okay, I'll go and have a look, thank you."

Zhou Yanchuan drove the car out of the gate, and sure enough, he caught a glimpse of a gray-haired figure with a slightly hunched back in the corner of the flower bed.

The person lowered his head and turned to face another direction. Zhou Yanchuan couldn't see her appearance clearly, so he walked around slowly and stopped the car in front of her.

"Yanchuan."

"Are you... auntie?" If he didn't still have an impression of the old man's unique tone, Zhou Yanchuan could hardly recognize that this was Liu Qingru's mother.

In the past ten years, she has changed much more than Liu Qingru. According to her age, she is only in her early sixties, but she is so old that it is difficult to distinguish her old appearance.

"Hey," she sighed, hesitated to speak, "I..."

"You came to see me?"

She nodded, still not speaking.

Zhou Yanchuan looked at the traffic ahead, and signaled to her: "Get in the car first, don't waste your time here." No matter what you want to say, the gate of the park is not a suitable place to talk.

Liu's mother lives with Liu Qingru's mother and daughter now, Zhou Yanchuan drove the car in that direction after asking.When he arrived at his destination, he had no intention of going up to sit.The old man's expression was cramped for a while, and he sat down with her on the stone bench in the community garden.

Street lights began to come on, and people returning home passed by them one by one.

After actually meeting Zhou Yanchuan and walking together all the way, Mother Liu realized how deep the gap between them is now.The more polite and thoughtful Zhou Yanchuan was, the stronger the sense of alienation.

When Zhou Yanchuan met Liu Qingru, Liu Qingru had just graduated from school.Once she fell ill and fainted, and Zhou Yanchuan, who had never met her before, carried her to the hospital and took care of her. Soon she fell in love with this pure and kind-hearted young man.But Zhou Yanchuan was just a wage earner from the county, and his education and work were not as good as Liu Qingru's, so he was strongly opposed by the Liu family.

Later, Liu's mother was persuaded, and she really thought that her daughter would go to the end with the other party, treating him as half her son and talking about everything.

People are not as good as heaven, and when we meet again, she can't even say an ordinary greeting.

"Auntie, do you have something to tell me?"

Zhou Yanchuan's words forced her back from the brink of shrinking, and she had no choice but to speak: "Yanchuan, I heard Qingru say that you two met again."

"Yes," Zhou Yanchuan didn't intend to hide it, and didn't think it was worth paying attention to. "We happened to meet twice, and we also met your granddaughter, who is very cute."

Mother Liu's complexion changed, and she rubbed her hands repeatedly, as if she was stuck in a speech barrier again, unable to utter a single syllable.

However, Zhou Yanchuan didn't answer this time, and quietly waited for her feedback.He has no intention of persecuting this embarrassing old man, but he doesn't want to be misunderstood that he still has the willingness to talk about the past.

"Has Qingru ever told you..." The old man's voice trembled uncontrollably, "She's already divorced?"

"She didn't say that," Zhou Yanchuan said calmly, not surprised by the news at all, "I heard your granddaughter say it."

"I knew it, my daughter, she can't talk to you... I think I should tell you, Yan Chuan," she frowned, deepening the wrinkles on her forehead, "Qingru has always loved you, when she... …After three years of marriage, she was willing to have a child because she couldn’t forget you. She and my son-in-law always had conflicts and quarreled constantly because of this.

"My wife is not in good health. Qingru doesn't want us to worry. She decided to divorce after her father passed away last year."

"Auntie," Zhou Yanchuan almost guessed her thoughts, "It doesn't make much sense to mention the past."

"It doesn't make sense..." Mother Liu repeated twice to herself, shaking her head and turning her face away, "Yanchuan, I thought you loved Qingru too, because you made us change our minds before, even her People as stubborn as Dad say... Yan Chuan is a good boy."

"When I was with Qingru, I didn't have any false feelings." Zhou Yanchuan pursed his lower lip lightly, "I also had a very decadent life after we broke up, and I never lied to you."

"I'm not blaming you," she said in a panic, "so you resent Qingru for abandoning you, don't you?"

"No, I never hated her." He said this to Lu Yunchu, and he didn't mind emphasizing it again in front of Liu Qingru's mother.

"Then... can you give her another chance? I heard that you two met again and thought it was fate," Liu's mother said incoherently, "Qingru is in pain, she is in so much pain and she still has to bring her child, child... ...Do you mind Lingling? I can take Lingling for you, and you start over—"

"Auntie, don't say that, the child is innocent." Thinking that the other party is an elder, Zhou Yanchuan didn't care about her rude request, but even a child was involved, he couldn't help feeling a little angry, "If I really If you are willing to reunite with Qingru, how can you care about your child? The problem between me and her is only related to the two of us."

His words not only implied his attitude towards Liu Qingru's daughter, but also gently reminded Mother Liu not to intervene on her behalf.

"Auntie," he said to the old man with a blank expression, "If Qingru still has an idea, I will communicate with her, and you can live your life steadily and don't have to worry about it, okay?"

Liu's mother heard his evasion, and the gap did not disappear, but instead expanded into a gap that was more difficult to bridge than strangers.

As night fell, Zhou Yanchuan drove home.The first rain in spring fell quietly, accompanied by a chilly chill.

It was a rainy day when I broke up with Liu Qingru.

When he saw Liu Qingru at the place where he was working at that time, he thought she was coming to wait for him to get off work, so he happily ran forward, saying that he hadn't been to Lao Luna for a long time, and he was hungry, and wanted to eat duck noodles with her.

Liu Qingru said calmly: "I plan to marry him."

Both of them knew who "he" was referring to.This news is not a discussion, but an announcement.

Zhou Yanchuan didn't bring an umbrella, and when he turned to leave, Liu Qingru wanted to hand him his umbrella.

He said: "No need." Without looking back, he stepped on the puddles on the ground and walked towards the station step by step. The T-shirt was completely wet and stuck to his back.

Liu Qingru disappeared from his world, not even returning to the shared apartment.

Since then, he has always disliked rainy days, and even if his feelings fade away, he still hates the damp and musty smell.

Zhou Yanchuan's car stopped a hundred meters away from the gate of Lanwan.

The street lamp was raining, and the young man holding an umbrella stood there, quietly watching his feet, not knowing what he was looking at.

He got out of the car and approached Lu Yunchu, only to find that there was a cat under the thick leaves of the bushes, and there was a plate full of cat food in front of the cat, and the cat's head was buried in the grain pile.

"Are you feeding the cat?"

When Lu Yunchu heard his voice, he turned his head in surprise, saw a car parked not far away, and immediately understood that he had just come back from outside.

"I didn't feed it, it was eating when I passed by." Seeing that he didn't have an umbrella, Lu Yunchu moved his own towards him, "Don't you have an umbrella in your car? You don't even open it when you get off."

"It's okay, it's not very big." Zhou Yanchuan stood closer, and pushed the umbrella back a little more indistinctly.

In the light rain at night, only the place where the light shines will show the falling track.The ground washed by the water is as bright as a mirror, reflecting the colorful lights of the city.

Zhou Yanchuan suddenly felt that the rain had a gentle force, wrapping his surging heart in it, so that he would not be disturbed or noticed.It's no wonder that literary youths like to sing about rainy days.

He is not literary at all, and he can't think of poetic lines full of artistic conception. It's just that the rain lines all over the sky give him a strange sense of security.

The cats should be stray cats nearby, and a few can often be seen in the Lanwan community and outside the gate.There is no shortage of food for them. Residents in the community like to buy cat food to feed them.

The cat ate the cat food on the plate, licked the clean surface of the plate, and stretched. It probably knew that the two of them were not the ones who kept the food. The bushes, nowhere to be seen.

"Have you had dinner?" Zhou Yanchuan asked.

"No," Lu Yunchu said, "I'm too lazy to do it today, so I went out to find something."

"Any idea?"

"I didn't originally..." Lu Yunchu glanced at him, "Now I want to go to the duck noodle shop you introduced."

The drizzle fell on the black umbrella cloth, like the noise of the TV set when the antenna failed in the old days.

Zhou Yanchuan's voice pierced through the rain: "Can I go with you?"