Instinctive reaction

Lin Leyang almost forgot to inquire about the news.

It can't be all his fault, he usually goes out in the afternoon on weekdays, and those who appear outside during this time are young people, and those who can gossip will try to control the volume as much as possible to prevent others from hearing it.

Only the elderly like to get together and discuss loudly, and they usually appear at six or seven o'clock in the morning.

As for how Lin Leyang thought of this matter, the main reason is that the temperature is gradually increasing these days. Once the sun shines at noon, he has no energy to step out. Coupled with Li Chuan's visit, he has no reason to go out up.But the physical condition is there, lying down all day will sooner or later make people lie down, and he is desperate, so he has to move the time of exercising to the morning, set the alarm and go for a morning run to get some air.

It doesn't matter when you go out, the sky is only slightly bright, and a group of old men and women are doing activities outside, stretching their legs, practicing boxing, and the 88-year-old uncle is stronger than him.

Lin Leyang was deeply shocked by this scene.

After walking like this for a day or two, he gradually blended in with the gang of grandpas and aunts, and jogged around the park familiarly. During this time, he could hear all kinds of gossip. During the ward rounds, I found that even the shop was gone. I asked why I took the shop away, saying that I thought it was my own after spending the money. For example, a mother in the obstetrics and gynecology department gave birth to a baby while going to the bathroom. You can get out of bed in two days; another example is that someone committed suicide on the fourth floor of the second building, tossing until more than three o'clock in the middle of the night, and the walls of the corridor are covered with blood marks...

Lin Leyang shook his body violently as he listened, and a voice entered his ears the next second.

"Isn't the fourth floor of that building unlucky?"

There were three or two old ladies in the pavilion, talking while bending their legs and pressing their waists.

"Oh, don't say it." Someone interrupted her, "I heard that a young man was dumped by a man and cut his wrist. The blood flowed from the ambulance all the way to the corridor! It's so evil!"

"Men? Men like men?"

"It's not a big deal. When I came in, I kept calling her name, but I didn't come to see him. It's a crime. I heard that I forgot everything when I woke up. Now I'm a fool."

Lin Leyang's pace slowly slowed down, still wondering who that idiot was.

"As soon as you said that, I knew it. Is it the one who lives in 406? I thought it was a girl from the back with the hair!"

"Hey, that's right."

Lin Leyang was numb all over.

406.

406...

Isn't that his ward number? !

##

Lin Leyang has been in a daze since early this morning.

Wu Xu brought him good news when he came, saying that he would be discharged from the hospital in two days.

Lin Leyang was not excited about it.

Zhao Ruixiao saw that something was wrong with him and asked him what was wrong.

Lin Leyang pointed at himself with a heavy face, his hands were still trembling uncontrollably, unable to say a word for a long time.

"What's the matter? You asked a child to play and he rejected you?" Wu Xu guessed wildly, and he has never seen the "child" in Lin Leyang's mouth so far.

"I..." Lin Leyang's expression was complicated, and he finally managed to say those four words, "Like men?"

silence.

The room was silent.

Until Zhao Ruixiao said: "You have to ask yourself, but why did you say that suddenly?"

Lin Leyang looked at the injury on his wrist, and his eyes fell on the newly laid sheets today. He looked extremely helpless, and murmured: "I said, what's wrong with you two that day..."

Wu Xu immediately became vigilant, "Don't think about it, we are really fine!"

"But how can I like men...I..." Lin Leyang really couldn't figure it out, thinking that when he was eight or nine years old, he liked Sailor Moon and Princess Gemini very much, and even dreamed of growing long hair to be a princess... etc. Wait, there seems to be something wrong, did I grow crooked at that time?

Lin Leyang still couldn't believe it.

Zhao Ruixiao and Wu Xu looked at each other, Zhao Ruixiao said: "Le Yang, calm down first, why do you say that so politely? Did you remember something?"

Seeing the reaction of the two of them, Lin Leyang knew that they must have really gone away.He shook his head and stared blankly: "I don't remember anything, don't remind me, please."

Zhao Ruixiao: "..."

Wu Xu: "..."

Lin Leyang was still immersed in his own emotions, "After a long time of being gay, it turned out to be me."

Wu Xu couldn't help but said, "You don't visit Weibo, this is a meme from many years ago."

Zhao Ruixiao: "You don't have to say a few words, let him take it easy."

Neither of them left at noon, they ordered takeaway outside and ate in front of Lin Leyang.

Lin Leyang was still unable to recover from the trauma of being gay, seeing the two of them holding a lunch box in each hand and eating deliciously made him even more heartbroken.

"Are you human?" he asked.

Wu Xu stuffed rice into his mouth and said, "Then you can't eat meat or spicy food. The last time I secretly brought you rice, you vomited and had a stomachache. Your sister almost licked me when she knew it."

Lin Leyang was extremely depressed.

Zhao Ruixiao spoke at the right time: "Can we talk now? Why do you suddenly want to ask such a thing?"

Lin Leyang couldn't eat anymore, so he sighed and told everything that happened in the morning.

Wu Xu was still eating when he heard half of the meal coughing violently.

Zhao Ruixiao asked him without changing his face: "What's wrong with you?"

Wu Xu blushed, "The chili choked, choked my throat."

Zhao Ruixiao smiled: "Either pick it out or swallow it."

Lin Leyang sat on the bed, and there was a folding table on the bed. He put his hands on it, approached him, and asked curiously, "Aren't you two..."

The two people facing him said in unison: "Really not!"

"Okay, no, no, don't be so excited." Lin Leyang propped his chin, "So what do they mean when they say I cut my wrist for a man?"

Wu Xu opened his mouth and said, "Don't listen to their nonsense..."

Zhao Ruixiao suddenly interjected, "What if what they said is the truth?"

Lin Leyang opened his mouth, "...do I really like men?"

Zhao Ruixiao looked at him, "You can't ask us about this, you have to ask yourself, do you like men or women now."

Lin Leyang was stunned, "I committed suicide because of a man, since you know why you didn't tell me?"

"I told you, what if you go to him again?" Zhao Ruixiao's expression was very calm, "You are not suitable, we don't want you to go to him again, and besides, you can't find him."

Lin Leyang automatically made up his mind: "He couldn't be impatient to be chased by me, so he hid?"

Wu Xu: "..."

Zhao Ruixiao: "Well, it can be understood in this way."

Lin Leyang's expression gradually became complicated: "So I am such an infatuated persona?"

Zhao Ruixiao became more serious as he spoke, and looked straight at him, "Le Yang, stop doing stupid things for him, your sister is really worried about you."

Lin Leyang swallowed, "Even if you say that now, I have no idea at all... Did I really cut my wrists for a scumbag? I like him that much?"

Wu Xu fell into a situation, "Why are you a scumbag?"

Lin Leyang looked innocent: "Aren't we together? Is it just me chasing him unilaterally?"

Wu Xu: "...you accept it very quickly."

Zhao Ruixiao took over the words, "Well, so like I said, he is not worthy of your nostalgia, don't think about it anymore."

Wu Xu's expression became more complicated, and he lowered his head and said in a low voice, "How dare you fucking say that."

"Don't forget what Sister Lin said." Zhao Ruixiao replied without turning her head.

There was a burning pain in his wrist, Lin Leyang couldn't believe that at the age of 28, he became gay, and even cut his wrist to commit suicide because of a scumbag...

"I'm going to sort it out. It means that I'm with a man and we like each other, but now he doesn't like me and has been avoiding me. I can't think of committing suicide?"

After Lin Leyang finished speaking, he felt it was ridiculous, even though he didn't have such vigorous emotions at all, and didn't feel that he would die for another person, but the performance of the two people opposite made him believe that this was the truth.

Zhao Ruixiao was silent for two seconds, then nodded.

Wu Xu pissed him off, then turned to Lin Leyang and said, "Why do you think you two like each other?"

"Isn't it? If we're together and don't like each other, then I'm too miserable!" Lin Leyang is eager to dig a hole to bury himself now, "Then does my sister know about this, and do my parents know? ?”

"...Sister Lin knows."

"My parents don't know? That's okay, don't tell them." Lin Leyang slumped himself on the table, "I'm a little messed up now..."

"Don't think about it, since you have forgotten." Zhao Ruixiao lowered his eyes, "Your sister wants you to be well now."

Wu Xu showed rare reticence, until finally he also said: "If you can't remember it, don't think about it. Aren't you very happy all day long? You even made friends with other children."

Lin Leyang has been immersed in his emotions for a long time, and he can't figure out what happened in the past ten years that can change his sexuality... At least he admired girls more before.

Now that the reason for his suicide has been found, he is not happy at all.

Can I go back to the past?Is it really amnesia?Even he himself is questioning.

Lin Leyang seemed to be stepping on clouds of soft cotton, every step he took was empty.What Zhao Ruixiao said, what Wu Xu said, including what he heard from others this morning, did not make him feel pain enough to shake his emotions. It stands to reason that he is willing to die for the other party, so he should love the other party very much... But only His wrist was hurting, which was a sequela after cutting his wrist. He always had hallucinations, thinking that he was in pain.

But there is one thing he knows very well.

"Don't worry, I won't go to him anymore. Since he doesn't want to see me, why should I go to him?" Lin Leyang got up from the table, his hair was messy, but his eyes were firm, ignorant and fearless, "And I Don’t even know his name, don’t tell me, it’s the 28-year-old me who likes him, and it’s not me.”

As soon as he finished speaking, there was a "squeak" sound from the door.

There are two more chapters