Cannon Fodder Collection [Comprehensive]

"K, what do you think?" Z asked K outside the office after interrogating Lin Ning.

K glanced at Z: "Don't tell me you plan to keep her, Z."

This time it was Z's turn to be surprised: "I thought you were more willing to accept her. Could it be because she is too smart?" The corners of Z's mouth twitched when he thought of this. IQ contempt several times, which is not so friendly to him, the head of MIB.

K frowned and said, "No, she's too young, and she's more suitable for the Department of Homeland Security, or the FBI."

Z raised his eyebrows slightly: "Are you serious?"

K: "Huh?"

Z: "I mean the FBI part, and maybe the Homeland Security Department."

Z doesn't think there's anything wrong with hacking other government organizations like this, but he immediately changed the subject: "But I agree with your part about her being too young, maybe we can let her go back first, and then recruit after a few years she."

The two reached a consensus temporarily, and then pushed the door open, but before they had time to say anything, Lin Ning said in a declarative tone: "So you don't intend to recruit me into MIB?"

Z: "...just temporarily."

Lin Ning hugged the pitcher plant and made a cute gesture: "That means you are still planning to use amnestics to erase my memory for two hours and 6 minutes this time, which is much longer than the previous 3 minutes, so maybe you don't need it this time. Three days, and I'll be here again by this time tomorrow."

Z:"…………"

K: "...you are still too young, you may have other choices, kid."

Lin Ning looked at him: "What will happen if you join MIB?"

K said bluntly: "You will cut off all contact with human beings, and no one will know your existence, no." It is undeniable that when K himself finished saying this sentence, he had no fluctuating emotions. Fluctuations, the last word "without" also has a different intonation than the other words.

Lin Ning can understand this kind of mood swing, but her own situation cannot be generalized with other people, so Lin Ning touched the dog's head of the pitcher plant and asked another question: "Why don't you let humans know about aliens? exist?"

K put it succinctly: "Humans are stupid, easily panicked and dangerous animals. I believe you understand what I mean, right?"

Lin Ning nodded: "They have always been subconsciously xenophobic towards aliens, and 'heterogeneous' does not only include aliens."

K quickly understood her extended meaning: "You mean people like you."

Lin Ning shrugged and said, "I'm so keen that I can see through a person in a short period of time, what do you think?"

Z finally regained his presence as the head of MIB: "So you want to join MIB?"

"At least I will feel at ease, otherwise, when I return to the crowd, I may end up as a sober lunatic, and the final destination is a mental hospital." Lin Ning still had an element of acting when he said these words Yes, but to a certain extent, this situation is not impossible, and she added seriously: "Psychiatric hospitals may also be a good choice."

What to say?

Leaving aside the life when Lin Ning became Situ Jing, she was still in the category of normal people at that time, but after she became Emilia Wood, because of the G virus, she lost all intelligence , memory ability, calculation ability, physical fitness, etc. have all been more or less, and some can even be called obvious improvement, which makes her gradually break away from the category of normal people.Not to mention that in the world of "Criminal Minds", her observation ability and judgment have been taught by the words and deeds of Gideon, a senior profiler. Such blessings have brought about many sequelae. People are one of them.

In the world of "Criminal Minds", Lin Ning may not realize it, but the people she usually comes into contact with, apart from the BAU profilers, are the perverted killers, and the White Queen, the artificial intelligence, and after that In addition, her friend is also Andrew, who has a high IQ and a low EQ.It can be said that her communication with ordinary people is basically negligible.

In the parallel world based on "Strange Tales from a Liaozhai Studio", Lin Ning was more exposed to ghosts and monsters. Even Shang Sanguan, one of Shiguanghe's "disciples", was a girl who didn't fit in with ordinary people. .Or maybe after going through these two worlds, Lin Ning failed to notice the problem, but when she came to this parallel world, before she thought it was just an ordinary parallel world, she was a little aware of the problem, then That is, she can be integrated into the ordinary world without the blessing of other elements, and she has the ability to become an excellent person, but she probably won't make many friends. In the end, the only one who can talk to her is the White Queen, and Nepenthes.

That's so boring, isn't it?

So MIB seems to have opened a door for her that represents a rich and colorful life, and it has to be pushed no matter what.

Then again, as soon as Lin Ning's "yearning" words for the mental hospital came out, Z: "..."

K: "..."

After Z recovered his senses, he exchanged a glance with K, and then changed his words: "You start as an intern for the time being, and you can become a full member of MIB when you reach the legal age of majority."

K interjected: "I hope that by then your second term of secondary school will have passed, and I will no longer think that you are the smartest person in the world, and you are so invincible and so lonely."

Lin Ning frowned, did she act out such a strong second taste?She's past the age of middle school, okay?It's just that the scene she acted in must continue to finish, so she said to K who sprayed the venom outside without money: "Thank you for your encouragement."

K: "You're welcome."

Z: "...Then K, you can take her around inside the MIB first." Is it his illusion?Why did he feel that the two of them often seemed to be on the same line of thinking, which was still an abnormal line, and when K and Lin Ning were sent away, and Z returned to the office chair, he had to continue to worry about choosing the right line for K. A new partner thing.Generally, when they recruit new members, they are selected from the military, such as the navy, air force, naval special forces, military special commandos, etc. They have received military training and generally have strong psychological qualities. Mental health is particularly important.

This is not easy, not to mention choosing a partner for K this time.

K, who was specifically named, was very conscientious in popularizing MIB to Lin Ning at this time, "Around 1950, the government established MIB, an organization with insufficient funds. Their purpose at that time was simple and funny, that was to try to communicate with aliens. Get in touch. As it turns out, the aliens didn't take this as a joke. In New York in 1961, the first contact with aliens was made. We had nine people, seven agents, and an astronomer that night. , and a lost boy."

As he spoke, he also handed Lin Ning a folder, on which was a graphic record of that historic meeting.One of the photos is the one described by K, in which there is a flying saucer standing in the usual image of people, and there is an alien in front of the flying saucer.This alien is one-third taller than ordinary people, his body lines are very smooth, with a metallic texture, and Lin Ning recognized him at a glance, "In the movie "Artificial Intelligence" directed by Steven Spielberg, Is the AI ​​that emerges based on them? Or are they a cameo?”

K: "It's indeed a cameo appearance by the Bout people."

After a pause, K added: "By the way, Steven Spielberg is also an alien."

Lin Ning: "Oh."

K: "..."

Lin Ning: "You are the one who sent flowers to the Bout - allow me to quote you - 'the lost boy'." In the photo, K gave a bouquet of roses to the Bout when he was young, If you look closely, you can still see that K's trouser pocket is slightly bulging, and that shape is most likely to be a ring box. However, considering that K joined MIB later, his marriage proposal is most likely to be nothing.

Lin Ning, who still has emotional intelligence and is not low, wisely did not mention this topic, and K said after choking a little: "They are a group of refugees from the Milky Way, and they want to use the earth as their political sanctuary, and we agree And helped hide the evidence of their landing. And the level of science and technology of the Bout people is much higher than that of the earth. In order to repay us, they will visit the earth every ten years to teach us new alien technology, and those patents are MIB's operating funds."

Lin Ning looked at K with burning eyes.

"Microwave ovens, fax machines, scanners, DVDs, etc. We sell the best DVDs." K said unhurriedly, "You are very lucky, child, and the time for the exposition once every ten years is very close. Last October."

Lin Ning: "..." She felt that she didn't need to show mercy to K, but considering that she was just a small intern detective, it was better not to confront K, an old fritter, so she rushed to K Showing a bright smile, "That's really a pity, please continue to talk about the history of MIB. Need I remind you where you just said?"

K: "... More and more non-human beings arrived on Earth, and they lived among us. Currently, there are about [-] aliens on Earth, and most of them live in Manhattan. Partly playing by the rules, just trying to make a living on Earth."

After talking, they came to the lobby. K first introduced the twins Blblup and Bob to Lin Ning, and then pointed to the big screen in front of them and said: "All the aliens are displayed on the map monitoring screen. A small number of them are under our surveillance at all times."

After meeting the twins, K took Lin Ning to visit the reception hall.I mentioned this reception hall before, it is set up in the MIB headquarters, and most of the time aliens enter and leave the earth go here, there is a special place to park the "ship", and the MIB is largely equivalent to Customs will conduct inquiries about aliens entering and leaving, and conduct routine inspections of their belongings.Of course, there are still some aliens who come and go from the earth, and they can use other methods, which are often illegal.

They also stopped to watch one of the aliens go through the customs. That alien came to the alien planet for the first time, and he came to the alien planet to apply for residence.This needs to be treated with caution, so staff will take him to take pictures and issue a residence permit. For aliens, there are two procedures for taking pictures.One is to take pictures of the body, and the other is to take pictures of his appearance after wearing a humanoid coat. The humanoid coat chosen by this alien is very ordinary. He looks like an ordinary middle-aged man with a little baldness. Fit, looks normal.Just waiting to take pictures of his body, that is, with four limbs, tree-root-like feet, two arms, and two antennae on his head, when he took a profile photo, he suddenly made a slightly coquettish pose.

Staff member: "...Please don't act cute maliciously, thank you."

Alien: "...I am showing my might and majesty, thank you!"

K narrates: "We get along pretty well most of the time."

Lin Ning nodded: "It can be seen."

Staff member: "..." But after thinking about it, he couldn't refute it. After all, K said it was "most of the time", but when he thought about this staff member who was also wearing a black suit, after K and Lin Ning walked away, He glanced over curiously.Since he was led by K to visit the headquarters, it meant that the headquarters wanted to recruit this newcomer, but when did MIB allow the recruitment of relatives of special agents? ——It can be seen that Lin Ning said at the gate that she is K's stepdaughter in just a while, and the news has already spread in the MIB headquarters.

The alien who was photographed came over with a gossipy face: "What are you looking at?"

Staff: "...please keep a certain distance from me, sir."

The alien was very dissatisfied: "I'm very harmless, okay?"

The staff member said indifferently: "It's up to me to decide, thank you." That's what the staff said, but after hesitant to speak, the staff still didn't pass on the internal gossip of MIB.

cough.

Besides, Lin Ning, who casually provided gossip, K asked abruptly, "Do you want some coffee?"

Lin Ning: "No, thank you."

K: "That's a pity, but I'd like a cup of coffee."

At this time, Z appeared like a ghost: "Emilia, come on."

Lin Ning: "?"

Z: "Put on the last outfit you wore."

MIB's most basic regulations for joining agents are as follows: "You can only wear the special clothes we give you as a black police detective, use our designated identity, go to our designated places to eat, and go to designated places to live."

From now on, you don't have any identity marks, you must not stand out anywhere, your overall image is shaped so that you can't leave any impression on anyone you meet, you are just a rumor, and people don't recognize you. , you don't exist, you weren't even born.Your name is Anonymous, silence is your language, you are no longer part of the system.

You are above the system, above the system, you are them, you are the detective in black. '

Lin Ning first changed into a black suit made by MIB. Considering that she was not yet of the legal age of majority, what MIB allocated to her was not the suit (suit top and black skirt) that ordinary female agents wear, but A common black suit is a black jacket and black trousers.This set of black clothes doesn't fit well, and after Lin Ning puts it on, it seems that his chest is even more flat. This is actually nothing. Nowadays, gender is not a problem worth entangled with. The problem worth exploring is others.

"Z, I have a question." Lin Ning said to Z after he came out holding the sleepy pitcher plant.

After a pause, Z asked, "What?"

But before Lin Ning could say anything, the twins had a new development.

Z made a pause gesture, then turned his head and walked towards the observation room where the twins were. After a while, he came back and said to K who was standing aside: "K, it's an emergency. Ambassador Aquilin sent an emergency distress signal, The distress signal came from a seafood restaurant. Why don't you take our interns with you?"

K: "I'm fine."

Z looked at Lin Ning, Lin Ning's attitude was very correct: "Yes, sir."

Z raised one eyebrow slightly, and glanced at the pitcher plant in her arms: "If you put your dog down, your attitude will be perfect."

Lin Ning thought for a while and said, "When I found and wiped out the Chrisens, I was walking my dog, sir. Of course, if you are willing to help me take care of it for a while, I would be sincerely grateful to you, sir."

Z:"…………"

The pitcher plant that finally fell asleep remained in Z's office, and Lin Ning followed K to the seafood restaurant.

In the seafood restaurant, a young man wearing glasses was choking on food, he was coughing desperately, and the waiter was strangling his abdominal cavity from behind, trying to help him spit out the food stuck in the trachea, but the service The doctor tried several times and it still didn't help, so he distressed another waiter beside him: "He can't spit it out!"

"The Sixth Department of the General Medical Administration, we will handle it." K took out his certificate and said.

Lin Ning looked curiously at the young man who was choking. This is the legendary Aquilin man who made a humanoid coat. Looking carefully at the words of this young man, there is a slight disharmony in the junction of his ears. , and K's next actions confirmed this point.I saw K pressed the young man's ear, and the young man's face was flipped from one side to the other like a book, revealing the empty head inside and a shrunken head about ten centimeters in size. Edition Aliens.

The image of this alien is like what people think aliens would look like, with a big head, detailed limbs, and a body with strange colors, and the shrunken version of the alien in front of him is holding his throat at this time, with a choked face. He looks uncomfortable, and if you look carefully, you will find a pair of operating bars in front of him. He is using the operating bars to operate the "humanoid coat" he wears, making him look like an ordinary earthling.

This is the Aquilinian.

K stepped forward and stretched out a finger, pointing at the Aquilinian's chest.

"cough--"

"puff--"

A cloud of vomit coughed out of the Aquilin's mouth and flew out in a parabola.

Lin Ning dodged slightly, and the ball of vomit brushed her shoulder and fell to the floor.

At the same time, Lin Ning did not forget to report: "Sir, it's prawns."

K: "...This is Master Cyrus, the best among the makers of humanoid garments."

Lin Ning showed a very sincere smile: "Nice to meet you, Master Cyrus."

The Aquilin man named Cyrus showed an embarrassed smile: "Are you the new detective in black? I'm glad to meet you too." He touched his throat with lingering fear, "I must have put The prawns went down the wrong pipe."

The others in the seafood restaurant were already petrified, and one of them all looked like they were also choking and not breathing well.

The waiters who watched the "treatment" up close: "!!!"

K is used to this, he took out the amnestic device from his suit pocket, and reminded Lin Ning, "Put on your sunglasses, intern."

Lin Ning put on sunglasses, which is one of the standard equipment of MIB, which can prevent the police detective in black from being erased by the amnestic device. The principle of this is yet to be further explored by Lin Ning. K also wore them, the most flamboyant one was the Aquilin man named Cyrus, as an alien, even if he was photographed by an amnestic device, he would be fine, but he still took out a The shrunken version of the sunglasses, I put them on as a matter of course.

Lin Ning: "No."

Following standard procedure, all direct witnesses and potential witnesses in the seafood restaurant were photographed with amnestics to make them forget what had just happened.The Aquilin named Cyrus thanked them both sincerely, and took their leave.

K opened the car door and said: "The Aquilins are a peace-loving race. You may know that Martin Luther King Jr. and John Lennon are all Aquilins, and the Fermacs are about the same size. Is their sworn enemy. The Fermacs are cunning and have always been committed to destroying the Aquilins by force - these are in the black detective manual, which is the next thing you need to read and master A book, The Intern." Martin Luther King Jr. was a famous civil rights activist, while John Lennon was the lead singer of the famous Beatles (The Beatles).

Lin Ning said calmly and sincerely, "Thank you for your reminder, sir."

K paused and said, "Get in the car."

Lin Ning blinked and got into the car.

In a short period of time, Lin Ning did not say that she had fully figured out K's temper, but she still saw that K was just a knife mouth, and facing such an "old guy" with a knife mouth but a tofu heart, Lin Ning thought he was still Have a lot of experience.What's more, Lin Ning can also distinguish between good intentions and malice in other people's words very keenly. Like K's words just now, although they don't sound pleasant, they are actually very good intentions.So Lin Ning wouldn't be really angry at such a remark, would he?

·

After returning to the MIB headquarters, Lin Ning talked to K and went to Z's office.Passing by the coffee room during the period, Lin Ning heard the sound of playfulness coming from inside. Lin Ning suddenly thought of something, knocked on the door, and pushed open the door of the coffee room.

In the not-so-spacious coffee room, apart from the strong smell of coffee, there are also four "people".They were all wearing capes with a strong Brazilian style, straw hats on their heads, and coffee cups in their hands, drinking happily.

Looking at them, each of them is only one meter tall, with a narrow figure, two tentacles on their foreheads, and a pair of black peas eyes, which look strange and agile.

And more figuratively speaking, they look a bit like grasshoppers without wings, especially their legs, which are especially like the hind legs of grasshoppers. They are fleshy and look very fresh and delicious.

Lin Ning thought this entirely from the perspective of pitcher plants, and if she remembered correctly, these four are the mascots of MIB, and their race seems to be worms, but they look like insects anyway.

At this time, one of the worms finally found Lin Ning, "Are you the new E? K's stepdaughter? Do you want coffee?" That's all they said, they didn't mean to bring Lin Ning a cup of coffee at all, and He even hugged the coffee cup in his hand even tighter, and at this time Z also walked over with a black face and the stamina of the pitcher plant. While handing the woken pitcher plant to Lin Ning, he looked down and drank the coffee. Non-Working Worms: "Did you drink all the coffee in my office?"

A worm asks the other friends: "Is it us?"

"No!" x3

"Z you heard, not us."

"Absolutely not." x3

Z: "Hehe."

"Wang!"

Lin Ning had the foresight to hug the limbs of the pitcher plant to prevent it from jumping down, in case it would bite on it, and "click" and "click" changed the four from "common people can't drink coffee, only the royal family can drink coffee." Drink coffee, but the civilians also like to drink coffee." Chew the worms from the stars.At the same time, he immediately turned around and said seriously to Z: "Sir, I need to talk to you."

Z: "...Come to my office."

After they left, the worms gathered together, and one of them said, "Did you feel a chill just now?"

The other one swears: "The air conditioner is broken."

Another one agreed without even thinking about it: "That's right, that's right, bring me some more coffee."

The last one held the coffee pot and spun around: "Coffee Coffee~"

And the worm who asked the question at the beginning also forgot the coolness in an instant, and danced happily around the coffee pot with his friends.

All they need is coffee, and nothing else matters.

But they didn't know that their natural enemy, the small insect-catching Nepenthes from another world, was still about to move. Even after Lin Ning warned it with his eyes, it only restrained a little bit, and did not show any signs of hunger. It has to be patient, which is one of the most professional qualities a predator should have.

Lin Ning sighed in her heart, but her face was very calm. After meeting Shang Z's probing gaze, she straightened her expression and said, "Sir, I actually kept a secret from you about my invasion of the MIB headquarters. part of the truth."

Z: "You say."

Lin Ning said slowly, "I have a helper."

Z: "What?"

Lin Ning said: "But don't be too nervous, she is my artificial intelligence."

Z raised his eyebrows slightly: "At the last expo, the Bot people showed us the technology of artificial intelligence. Our MIB concluded after research that this technology cannot appear on the earth within 40 years. .Now you say you have an artificial intelligence?"

Lin Ning calculated the time of the last expo, and regretted that there were still nine years before the next expo. As for Z's question, Lin Ning said unhurriedly: "She can be my personal assistant."

Z said with a blank face: "In the case that I don't even have a personal assistant."

"I think I understand what you mean," Lin Ning thought for a while and said, "She can be my personal assistant for free and help me serve MIB better. Of course, if you insist on letting her go through formal procedures If so, then the corresponding MIB has to pay the corresponding remuneration. In fact, to tell you the truth, before this, I needed her to support me." She said with a shy and proud smile.

Z: "...No, you didn't understand what I meant."

But let Lin Ning say this, Z diverged his thinking instead, and squeezed out a smile that he thought was kind to Lin Ning: "Son, to tell you the truth, MIB has a scientific research department, maybe you would rather work in the scientific research department. In this way, you can bring your artificial intelligence personal assistant and your pet dog with you." MIB is self-defeating, except for the invention patents brought to them by the Bout people, they are actually in the interstellar world. There are still other businesses during the period. In the past, they had no advantages in scientific research products, but now maybe they will bring a turn for the better?After all, the family should know whether oil, salt, firewood and rice are expensive, not to mention that this is a win-win arrangement.

Lin Ning: "But I still think it's more interesting to go out to work."

Z cleared his throat and said: "As you have seen, among K's recent outings, one was to bring back a drunk and complaining alien actor, and the other was to rescue a man who was stuck in a prawn. Aquilin, which one of these is interesting? It all turned out to be trivial in the end."

Lin Ning said abruptly: "The neighborhood committee."

Z: "What?"

Lin Ning explained: "I mean, I summed up the two tasks you mentioned, sir, and the MIB acts like a neighborhood committee." For this part of the aliens, it is equivalent to the neighborhood committee, while for the other part of the aliens, the MIB is the "urban management".

Z: "..." It seems a bit similar to say that, but in fact, some of the things that MIB usually does are far more thrilling. Look at how many times they have saved the earth from the brink of extinction after the establishment of MIB. ?It's just that isn't he trying to stop the kid in front of him from going out to work? Z thought for a while and said simply: "Anyway, before you reach the legal age of majority, you are not the first choice for field work, and we are already selecting a new official partner for K."

Lin Ning: "I know."

Z:"……"

Z breathed a sigh of relief and said, "This is an order."

At the same time, Z also threw a "sweet date": "Your code name will be E." It happened that the E in the MIB had been vacant for a long time, and it was just to fill it in. Now, such a code name is taken from For the name, Lin Ning’s current name is Emilia, of course, there may be other mechanisms, and this needs to be further explored by Lin Ning.

Then Lin Ning moved from the original community into the apartment designated by MIB, and the White Queen's server and central processing unit were also moved to the basement of this MIB apartment.Before that, any information about Emilia Wood in this world, including the birth certificate, was deleted by MIB, and her fingerprints were also eliminated, which meant that there was no such person as Emilia Wood in the world anymore.Anyone who enters the MIB is required to do so. As mentioned earlier, MIB agents are all outside the system.

But then again, after entering MIB, Lin Ning's non-working life is no different from before.The White Queen is still her solid backing, and the pitcher plant is still her dog.

No, it's still a little different, that is, before Lin Ning takes it to work, he has to repeatedly tell it not to drool at the insectoid aliens in the MIB including the four worms, let alone catch them as food .

Nepenthes: "Wow!"

Lin Ning said in a good voice: "I know you can't drool, I just said that you can't treat them as prey, at least until I verify their body structure. Who knows if you will digest them after eating them?" Bad? Of course, I mean insect-like aliens that are not on the MIB blacklist, you'd better not eat them, it might trigger an interstellar war."

Nepenthes: "Hmph."

Lin Ning: "...I didn't say you were making trouble for no reason."

The White Queen said next to it: "Perhaps the pitcher plant is anxious because it doesn't adapt well to the new environment. I can make an appointment for a veterinarian for it."

Lin Ning felt that what the White Queen said was not unreasonable, but she felt that with the big heart of the pitcher plant, the chance of it causing psychological anxiety is not high. Keep it in mind: "Maybe we can find a job for Nepenthes, but the timing is not right now. And we should make a Chinese-English translator for it as soon as possible. This is relatively simple, and the materials in MIB are complete. We can make a finished product when we get off work in the afternoon.”

The White Queen asked: "Is the timing you mentioned the one I know, Emilia? But then how do you explain the abnormality of the pitcher plant?"

Lin Ning touched his chin and said, "I really have to think about this."

Back to the work after entering MIB, Lin Ning actually did not immediately start working in the scientific research department. After all, she still needs to add a lot of common sense before that, basically it is about the MIB and the aliens recorded in the MIB manual. People, and during her lunch break that day, when she was flipping through the MIB manual, K came over and announced with a blank expression: "Next, I will be your combat training teacher, and the course will last until I think you are qualified." until."

K paused and added: "This also includes MIB's various weapon tutorials."

Lin Ning stood up from the chair and asked, "Since when?"

K: "From when I'm free."

Lin Ning: "So from now on?" But as soon as she finished speaking, Z appeared like a ghost again: "Something happened to the Aquilins!"