dance like a butterfly

Lao Han froze for a moment, as if he suddenly realized something, glanced at me, and chased me out.

I bowed my head, feeling helpless.An emotion began to weigh heavily on my heart.

I know that no matter who sees or hears such words, they will be deeply hurt.

His whole body was hot and dry, and the unbearable itching pain from the wound on his back hit again.

Only then did I realize that after the accident, the physical torment of the pain had caused my physical needs to temporarily enter a state of hibernation.But the mental torment gave me a childlike dependence on my love for Lao Han.His warm hands and his gentle touch often make me imagine that I am a child and always want to snuggle in his arms.

Although his love has completely overwhelmed me, when I was lying on the hospital bed, I would still think of his son with great envy, and the fatherly smile on his face when he shared the family happiness with a pair of children.

At the same time, I suddenly realized that since the burn, especially after being admitted to Xijing Hospital, the image of Lao Zuo in my mind has changed.Sometimes, I can also talk to him calmly.During the treatment process, the relationship between Lao Zuo and the fourth doctor Da Jiangang, his busy figure, his carefulness and patience, Lao Han really couldn't replace him in many cases.

I admit that the reason why I never want to call him "brother" is entirely to let him die that hopeful heart.

Through this period of communication in adversity, I feel that although I can't share my same-sex love with anyone except Lao Han, I can completely accept the care of a brother like a brother.Because I have two older brothers, I know how to accept this kind of family love, and I also know how to treat them with the same love.

But I know that what Lao Zuo needs is not just a "god brother", but it is impossible for me to give him more affection he desires.If this continues, the "debt of love" I owe him will never be repaid!

The hospital is a special environment, where people's feelings can be suppressed, and I can face Lao Zuo calmly here.But who can tell me, what should I do after leaving the hospital?What else can I do?

Just like the situation just now, shouldn't I say this to Lao Han?Can't Lao Han answer me like that?That's right, Lao Zuo is a good person, but Lao Zuo didn't give me a feeling at the beginning, making me think that he was the person I was looking forward to in my life.During the one or two years with him, he treated me very well, but I was still not satisfied, and stubbornly continued to search in my own world, looking for someone I thought I could entrust my whole life to, until I met Old Han.

Some people may say, is there anything to be worried about people like Lao Zuo?But my feeling is that what I need to entrust to others is not only my own body, but the love of my life.If, my love is a lock, if my love is a river, I expect people like Lao Han to open it forcefully and cross it forcefully.

I really can no longer bear the same-sex love of Lao Zuo beyond brotherly affection in my heart at the same time, and I can't repay his deep affection at the same time, which makes me very distressed!

The phone rang suddenly, grab it and look at it, Guo Jingqi!

It has been more than 20 days since I went home, from a business trip to the accident, and I have never had a chance to think of this name. When I suddenly received a call from him, I felt very sorry for him.

"Friend, where are you?" Guo Jingqi was very excited.

"I'm at home. I just came back from a business trip. Are you okay? Are you in Xi'an?" There is no need for him to worry about me, I lied.

"Haha, I'm back to Aksu. How are you doing recently? How is Lao Han treating you?"

"Oh? How did you go back? Is your injury healed? I'm really sorry, I feel very guilty." Regarding Guo Jingqi's trip to Xi'an and this unwarranted disaster, I will regret it for the rest of my life, really.

The hearty man laughed loudly: "What is that little injury? I stayed in the hospital for ten days, and left after the stitches were removed. How is Lao Han treating you?"

"It's okay." I smiled: "How is your business in Xi'an?"

He paused and said, "The business over there has already started, but I won't go to Xi'an again. I'll send another salesman there to take care of it."

"Oh? Why didn't you come?"

Guo Jingqi's voice suddenly became dull: "Listen to my friend: I originally wanted to go to Xi'an to find you, and I wanted to be as close as before with you, but you have Lao Han. I can see that , Lao Han really likes you. Since this is the case, you should have a good time, and I have no reason to stay in Xi'an anymore. If you have a chance in the future, come to Aksu with Lao Han, and I will treat you well!"

Tears started rolling in my eyes.

Those past events suddenly came to mind so clearly!

The dusty festival in Aksu, the exotic style of costumes, the distant blue sky, the strong smell of beef and mutton, the sturdy figure of Guo Jingqi, the ecstasy and shock he brought to me, and the passion after scene The image of him, the solid feeling of him in my arms, became clear and blurred like a phantom, and slowly receded like a tide.

Goodbye, my Aksu, goodbye, Guo Jingqi.

I don't know what's going on today, first Lao Zuo, then Guo Jingqi, it hurts me as if they rushed over one by one.

Regardless of whether the battlefield of love is the prairie with fragrant grass or the endless golden desert, when I think of these emotional passers-by who have passed through my life, I can hardly restrain my excitement.

All these feelings make me unable not to become a demented idol at this moment, and unable to stop standing and staring in an invisible river.

Can I repent?What kind of life inspiration can I get?

I am at a loss.

Those who have passed away, let them become a kind of past!

I can only hold on to my old Han in front of me, and tie him tightly to my fate.Since I am constantly screening, since Lao Han has become my only one, what I can do now is to firmly embed him in my life, hold him well, and possess him well.

Guo Jingqi, big brother, I wish you happiness, you will be happier than me!

In my heart, I recite silently over and over again, and bless him over and over again.

"Haha, why is Xiaohui staring blankly at the window?" Suddenly, a brisk and enthusiastic female voice came over.

I was in a daze and was taken aback.

Turning around to see, Xueping was holding a big flower basket, and Zhang Wenqing was standing at the door with a big bag of fruits, smiling.

I couldn't help but smile at such a woman, and hurried to meet her.

"Have a good rest. Don't get out of bed easily, aren't you still recovering quickly? Isn't the loss outweighed by the wound?" A woman like Xueping always makes people feel happy.

"Sister-in-law is so polite." I offered my seat to her.

"Damn it, sister-in-law, for such a long time, I can't get away to see you. It's the end of the year, and there are many things, little brother, forgive me. Come, show sister-in-law, how is your recovery?" Xueping was extremely enthusiastic, with a very friendly smile .

In the eyes of outsiders, Xueping must be my own sister-in-law.

The bandages on my arms and neck had long since been removed, leaving only a faint mark.Only a small piece of gauze was stuck on the face.As early as a few days ago, I put on a very loose and thin beige T-shirt.

Xueping took a closer look and said with a smile: "We Xiaohui, it's not wrong to be injured, but he is still so handsome and youthful. With your illness, Lao Han has lost his soul. Similarly, I couldn't sit still in the office, and slipped away in the blink of an eye, leaving many things to me, don't blame my sister-in-law for not coming to see you!"

I laughed and said, "What are you talking about, sister-in-law? The flowers you sent are so beautiful!"

Because there is a snow screen in this ward, the atmosphere will be different immediately.

The calla lily is pink, the carnation is purple, and the baby's breath is white.

Zhang Wenqing didn't speak, just looked at Xueping and me and smiled.

While chatting and laughing in a low voice, Lao Han walked in.

Xueping stood up to meet him: "Didn't you say when you will be discharged from the hospital?"

Old Han smiled, "It will take ten days."

Zhang Wenqing said: "Anyway, if Nanzhang pays, let's spend it boldly. Also, they don't pay for mental damage, so there's no way."

Xueping said: "It's not about money now. The key is to be completely cured, so we can rest assured." Then he turned to me and said, "Your illness has made everyone in our village tremble. Old Han is not at ease. The village How many people can sit still? So, Xiaohui, you have to take good care of it, don't worry."

After Xueping said this, my face turned red immediately, and everyone laughed.

"Why are there so many people today? So happy, what are you talking about?" Before the laughter fell, a gentle male voice came over.

At the door, a burly and strong middle-aged man in a police uniform stood at the door.With big eyes, a high nose bridge, a heroic posture, and a dignified and upright look, with a few gift boxes in his hands, Chen Hanzhang.

Zhang Wenqing had sharp eyes and quick legs, and immediately took two steps over to pick up the things in his hands.

Zhang Wenqing took off his police cap and nodded to Lao Han: "It's really lively today."

Lao Han laughed to give up his seat, and Xueping went to pour water.

I was in a daze.

Chen Hanzhang sat down on the edge of the bed: "Xiaohui, I can also see that anyone in the world can get sick, but you can't!"