our psalms

What is life and death, I have never considered such a deep moment in my impression.When you have cried and complained, complained and complained, and still cannot change some facts, all you can think of is to let yourself leave in a more meaningful way.Many times in moments of despair, I saw that familiar and vicissitudes of life smiling face, saw him break my confusion bit by bit, saw him break my fear bit by bit, saw him guide me bit by bit Going to the most beautiful paradise on earth, at that time, it seemed that eternity had been tightly held in my hands.

Looking at the constantly receding scenery outside the car window, and no matter what is ahead, it seems to be full of life and hope. Turning around and looking at the man who is humming a ditty and driving with a cigarette in his mouth, unconsciously, my thoughts have brought me to a long time. long, long ago.

That was the first time I saw him, he was standing at the school gate, looking at me from a distance, I saw him too, he was wearing a police uniform, I thought I had misidentified the person, when he stood by my door When I was in front of you, I never thought that this reckless, unrestrained and bold middle-aged man turned out to be the man who completely took my soul away.The smile at that time seemed to be very different from now. At that time, he was looking for his own destination in the established rules, but now, he smiled firmly. He knew that he had completely obtained it, and he didn’t need to follow anything. Law, because his destiny should be created by himself.

How proud should I be? When I find myself a child who doesn't understand anything, who only knows yearning and dreaming, but has completely changed the person I love the most, is it pride or happiness?

In fact, I was really lucky, maybe the only explanation is this.Now that I'm so lucky, I have nothing to complain about. Even if God opened the door and closed the window for me, it's fair, isn't it?

"What are you thinking about?" Lao Cao, who was driving the car, suddenly turned his head and looked at me, "If you pick it again, you will take off the paint on the handle. This is a newly bought car, kid!"

"Is it that easy to pick it off? Do you think I'm an eagle's claw?" I regained my senses and put my hand back on my knee.

"Why do you seem to be depressed? What are you thinking? Isn't dad happy to accompany you out for a long vacation?"

"No, it's just, where are you going? Isn't it good to fly? Why do you have to drive yourself? The long-distance bus is very tiring."

"Lazy thing, you should exercise more, you can't bear this kind of hardship." Lao Cao stretched out his other hand and patted my head, "We will find a place to rest when we get off this high speed immediately Alright, let’s continue on the road tomorrow.”

"No, Officer Cao, please tell me honestly, where are we going? Why haven't we arrived after sitting for a whole day? Go to Tibet?!"

"Don't worry, I won't sell you out. I believe Dad will arrive tomorrow, and I will definitely give you a surprise when he arrives!" Lao Cao said mysteriously.

"I'm afraid that when I wake up and find myself on the snowy mountains of the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau, that would be a pleasant surprise..." I made a sweaty expression, then rolled over and sat on the back to get something to eat.Lao Cao immediately yelled: "I'm still eating, I'll get out of the car and find a hotel to eat right away, no snacks!"

I didn't listen to what he said, I tore open a bag of beef jerky and stuffed it into my mouth.

"Why are you so disobedient?" Lao Cao was a little angry, but his expression changed immediately, "Give dad one too..."

I squinted at him and said, "Hey... don't you want it? It's too ugly."

This time, Lao Cao gave me a dissatisfied glance and said, "God, the baby is for nothing, and I don't even feed the old man. What kind of baby..."

"Stop..." I yelled, "Okay, can I feed it?" I reached out with the beef jerky, but I didn't expect that the target of Lao Cao's attack was not beef, but kissed my hand, scaring me. I have to shrink back quickly.Lao Cao was laughing out loud at this moment.

"Damn it, you're not afraid of being seen by others, you unrestrained and confident man!" I threw away the beef in my hand, and wanted to bite him to retaliate, but I found that I was still not as unrestrained as him.

"Come on, bite me..." He got excited, "I bet you don't dare!"

Furious, I pounded his arm with my fist relentlessly.He yelled: "Don't, I'm driving, I need to call the next..."

"Go to hell!!!"

In fact, I have thought about this picture a long time ago.I would come to a hotel room with a man and live with him.That was when I was still full of longing and fantasies about this world. It seemed that most of the articles and novels on the Internet were described in this way, and most of the places where gay feelings were born were also in this environment.So I have always believed that I can't escape such a fate. I never expected to meet Lao Cao, this man who is always out of touch with reality. I have been with him for so long. This should be the first time we are in a hotel outside. live here.

But it felt weird. There were two beds in the room. As soon as Lao Cao swiped his card to enter the room, he began to test whether the door could be closed from the inside. When he was sure it was safe, he immediately rushed towards me...

"Let go of me, I'm out of strength, don't..." I pushed his face away, but it didn't help at all.

"Go to dinner right away, you have to be good and let uncle kiss you." Lao Cao's beard kept pricking my face.

"Dad, do you think there are comrades living in this room?" I don't know why I thought of asking this question, but Lao Cao, who was still on my face, raised his head and made a very embarrassing expression , said: "You think too far. You doll, why are you always so complicated in your mind, you just need to remember that you lived with your uncle!"

"Stop pressing me, I'm almost out of breath," I yelled, "I want to eat!"

"I think it's better to go out to eat together. This is a small town, and there are many interesting and delicious things outside." Lao Cao said with a seductive tone.

"No, we agreed just now, you go out to pack and come back, Mr. Cao, don't count your words... Hehe..."

"But it's not that you can't walk because of the pain in your legs. You've been riding in the car all the time. How could your legs hurt?"

"Stop talking nonsense, anyway, if you agree, you agree!"

"Okay then, don't forget the price in exchange. Tonight, dad's fingernails will be cut off by you."

"Okay, I mean what I say, you go and buy food, it's best not to buy noodles..."

"Forget about being lazy!" Lao Cao staggered up from the bed, opened the door and went out.As soon as he closed the door, I hurriedly took out the medicine bottle from my travel bag and swallowed a few pills with mineral water. I clutched my painful chest, and the nosebleed immediately flowed out of my nostrils slowly.