our psalms

My name is Cao Wenxi, and my English name is VICY, which is the name my mother gave me.When I was very young, in my memory, in sporadic fragments, I could always see my mother lying on the balcony and watching.More than once, she held me in her arms with tears and asked me why, why my uncle did that, why he didn't care about our mother and daughter.

I always see the deepest and strongest loneliness and loneliness in my mother's tears.I was always full of sympathy for her, but also full of helplessness.Whenever I saw the father who was wearing a uniform and looked tired and disdainful when he got home, he looked indifferently and indifferently at his mother, and I became extremely angry.Why does that man whom I call uncle seem so strange and so hateful.

Every time my mother smiled at me from under his sinful hands with tears in her eyes and told me that my mother was fine.I will hate him even more, resent him even more, the man I call my uncle.

I have thought that because he is a policeman, he is different from ordinary people.His personality, his temper, and his unreasonableness are all taken for granted and helpless.But as I grew up, I found that only children would naively believe in many things.

It was me who told them to divorce.

When I said those two words, my mother watched in shock, she didn't say anything, she was still crying.

When that day really came, my mother and I stepped out the door carrying heavy suitcases and tears that no one could measure.For the first time, the stranger whom I called Uncle cried before my eyes.

"Wenxi, don't leave Uncle!" For the first time, I felt that he was on me, and there was still hope and hope.

"My daughter is mine!" Mom looked so resolute, "Why do you have her? What right do you have to want her?"

Of course, the choice was mine, and I took my mother's side without hesitation.Because, even now, that man is still so strange and terrifying to me.

I just left, I don't think I can guess what I can really take away with my departure, what my departure means to that unsmiling father in uniform.

As the days passed day by day, I began to mature and began to examine and look at problems with a rational and scientific attitude.Finally, at the end, I feel that I am still Cao Wenxi and Cao Yongwen's daughter.I have a father and an uncle who is a policeman in China.I didn't steal it, let alone pick it up.His blood runs through my body.

I tried to get back into his arms, this is my right, and no one can take that away.Even my mother is the same.When that uncle whom I had not seen for many years came back to me, he changed a lot.At this time, from him, one can fully feel the gesture and kindness of a father.I'm starting to wonder why.What made him change constantly, in a sense, why did he know how to cherish his lost daughter now.Why is it only now that I look like a father.

Therefore, I began to act like a baby and started to be naughty, although maybe I was not such a person in my heart.But now, I have a father who will discipline me tirelessly and educate me tirelessly.I like this feeling, only in this way, I can feel that I am a daughter of a person.

But in fact, it is never as simple as I thought. Maybe in his life, I am just an obligation, and the me that exists because of him is just a responsibility he has to bear.I'm not reconciled, I don't want to be just such a role.

When the boy named Yang Xing appeared in that room, I began to learn to be jealous and envious.Because the father looked at him, besides the same tenderness and kindness, there was something else.Things that drive me crazy, things that drive me mad.

He also called my uncle Uncle.

There is nothing I can't do or dare not do, especially when I inadvertently peek from the corner and see them hugging each other lingeringly and kissing each other fiercely.

At that time, I really didn't want to believe it, but the fact is that after all, my father is gay, just like the boy named Yang Xing, they fell in "love"?

The concept of homosexuality is already very common in foreign countries where I have lived for a long time.I have never had any different or extreme views on people like them. I even think that as long as I like them, there is nothing wrong. As long as I like them, as long as there is love, no one has the right and qualification to deprive and interference.

However, he was my uncle, and it was for this reason that his relationship with his mother became increasingly tense, which eventually led to the separation.Because of this reason, I lost my father and became a child without a father in the eyes of others.

I will never allow this, so I must change my fate.

I didn't think about how selfish I was, I just thought I was taking back what was mine.Yang Xing was just a victim. When he died, my heart was almost calm and frightened myself.But what I never expected was that Wang Zicheng, that child named Wang Zicheng, that incredible child, he shook me.

Why is there such a deep and strong love, why is it so moving and unbelievably firm.With only half of his life left, he had to return to his arms so stupidly, and smiled so stupidly and said to him, uncle, I'm fine.

Is this love? I am also confused.

Where is love so deep, where is love so firm, where is love so eternal, where is love so stupid!

There is no between men and women, but there is between them.If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't, I wouldn't have believed it.

I was defeated, even if I lost, I was so happy to lose.I don't have any regrets, because the great power embodied from them completely changed me.I couldn't do it, maybe a lot of people couldn't do it, but they did it, my uncle did it...

It's time for me to take all the sins of my body and go to receive a new baptism...

The day Cao Wenxi left, it was my old Cao who went to see her off.At the airport, they hugged each other for a long, long time.Seeing that the father and daughter can finally embrace so frankly and sincerely, I am really happy for them in my heart.When Cao Wenxi called him uncle, her voice was so pure and natural.

"Uncle, I'm leaving. Take care, and...brother." She smiled and waved at me, and I smiled at her too.Lao Cao kept stroking his daughter's head, trying not to let tears fall from his moist eyes, "Although we have said enough of these three words, uncle still has to say it, and say it again at the end. I'm sorry , daughter. Forgive uncle!"

Cao Wenxi shook her head, and threw herself into her father's pain again and wept.As she boarded the plane for the last time, she turned to us and shouted, "Promise me, Uncle, that you will be happy..."

Must be happy, thank you, sister.I spoke silently, watching Lao Cao's uncontrollable tears falling on my chest at last, I stuffed a piece of toilet paper into his hand, and saw that he was looking at me affectionately, longing for When I can also show that kind of firmness and determination at this moment, I smiled indifferently.

"Dad wants to cry and finish crying quickly. After crying, I still have to go back to cook. I'm hungry again!"

"You kid is looking for smoke!" Lao Cao burst into tears when he heard what I said. This time he stroked my head and told me: "You are the only one in Dad's world, baby."

I didn't say anything, didn't want to say anything, and ran forward quickly.The sky is still so clear, the earth is still so vast, and Lao Cao is still by my side. I suddenly feel so satisfied, so satisfied.

"Father Cao, hurry up, please return the police. I want to eat braised pork ribs at noon, and..."

"I only think about eating all day long, what should I do if I become a pig in the future?"

"You have to raise it even if it becomes a pig, isn't it haha."

"I now feel like I raised a pig..."

We just walked happily and easily back to the car and left the airport.A new day has begun again, and I also believe that every day will be a new day in the future.

A girl with a suitcase at the gate of the airport has been watching us from a distance, smiling.She looked at the ticket in her hand, gritted her teeth and walked towards the airport.

Zicheng, I'm leaving, you must remember that I once loved you, and my name is Kuang Li...

"Wang Zicheng, you haven't taken any medicine!"

"Can't we eat first, I'm almost starving to death!"

"Your Uncle He said that this traditional Chinese medicine must be taken half an hour before meals."

"Then you can drink it tomorrow..."

"No!"