[HP] The Tweed River flows

I sat on the edge of the bed rubbing my wrists and looked out the window absently.The feeling of the wand being pulled out of my hand still scares me. The irreversible power in the spell is like a towering mountain, which makes people awe-inspiring.In the blink of an eye, I can repel the spells I cast with all my strength, disarm me easily, and in a blink of an eye, people can be rendered defenseless.For the first time, I personally felt the power of my mother, and for the first time, I felt my own insignificance. Those so-called efforts were like standing on tiptoe to compare with the Alps.

The wand was still lying on the hallway floor.I stare at my empty hands for a moment, burying my entire face in them.I thought tears would come, but my eyes were dry.A feeling of emptiness spread from my heart to my limbs, which gradually made me feel a little exhausted.I stared at the empty bed in the dormitory, trying to find someone to talk to, but found that I had nothing left.Indeed, nothing.

I haven't spoken to Syl since that day in Potions class.I knew it wasn't her fault at all, but every eye contact made me feel so awkward.I can't tell the difference between this confusing and subtle feeling, because I can't imagine that I am actually jealous of her.

There was a faint sound of laughter outside the door, and someone was discussing something while going up the stairs.

"...Okay, no problem! Tomorrow morning, at the stairs, see you there!" Sylvia happily waved to someone behind me that I couldn't see, turned her head to see me, her smile froze up.

"Are you going out tomorrow?"

"Ah?" She froze for a moment, as if she didn't expect that I would talk to her, "...Yes."

"With whom?" I asked endlessly, but I didn't understand why I did this.

"Jane, you don't know," she stroked her hair in embarrassment, avoiding my gaze.

"who is she?"

"A friend," she said casually, still not meeting my eyes.

For some reason, the word "friend" tingles my nerves.She used to call me that too.

"New friend? You make friends so quickly..." I said coldly, completely unexpected that there would be such a strong sourness in my tone.

"Is there anything wrong?" Sylvia said lightly, and finally turned around and looked into my eyes with a calm and calm expression.

"Of course," I laughed at myself, "if the old one doesn't go, the new one won't come."

"what happened to you?"

"I'm fine, very fine, great," I say in a tone that's almost fake, but I really hate the way I am.

"Don't I even have the right to make friends?"

"Of course, what does this have to do with me?" I said sarcastically, but I felt a dull pain in my heart. Why did I have such a conversation with her?

"We haven't talked to each other for a while, do you want to quarrel with me?" She replied with the same tone, and the tit-for-tat confrontation did not lose the wind in the slightest.

"Sorry, I'm in a bad mood," I said curtly, trying to calm myself down.What's wrong with me, why do I say these inexplicable things?

"Are you mad that I made new friends?" she said bluntly.

"I don't," I replied irritably, the feeling of wanting to talk to someone just now disappeared, and now I just want to be alone.

"You do," she pointed out sharply, "you talk in exactly the same tone as my little sister, who always does when I mention someone she doesn't know. I thought she was too young, but I Didn't expect you to be like this."

"I didn't!" I said in disgust.I was a little annoyed that Seale was comparing me to her naive little sister, but what pissed me off the most was the vague realization that she was right.

"You probably don't have siblings—"

"I didn't—" I blurted out, and then realized my mistake, "—I have a brother." If I were Uncle Rex's daughter, then Hayden would be my brother.

"Then you should understand that we all have our own lives and no one is just someone else's—"

"That's enough, don't come and teach me, I'm not your sister!" I raised my voice a little to end this nonsensical conversation.

"Helena, you have changed." After a long silence, Sylvia looked at me with complicated eyes and said.The disappointment and anger I have never seen appeared in those eyes that sparkled with enthusiasm and curiosity.

"Really? I guess you're going to say I've become 'bad'," I said casually, trying to suppress my inexplicable anger.It's my fault again, right?

"No, it's becoming... stranger," she hesitated, and said a word that I didn't expect at all.Disappointment and anger faded, replaced by uncertain hesitation, as if looking at someone she didn't know.

"what?"

"You've never spoken like that before."

"is it?"

"That's right," her voice became certain. "You've never been like this before. I almost don't recognize you."

"Are you referring to the self-abased and weak me who can only cry by myself and live by watching other people's faces?" I raised my head proudly, "I would rather give up than this me."

"No, it's not like that..." Sylvia hesitated for a moment, "The way you looked just now... looks like Alexandra."

It was as if I had hit an invisible wall.The one I hate the most?Am I becoming someone I hate?

I looked at her in disbelief and said, "You're crazy."

"No, I'm sober," she said firmly. "I've wanted to talk to you for a long time, but I couldn't find the right opportunity... You weren't like this before. You weren't so proud and supercilious, and you didn't Competitive and self-centered, you are always humble, not so possessive, always considerate of others, say 'I'm sorry', never say anything hurtful, you— —”

"—that's enough," I interrupted her coldly, signaling her not to go on.She doesn't know anything, so what right does she have to tell me what to do?No one understands my sorrow, and no one understands my painstaking efforts in doing all this.I just wanted to prove myself and protect myself, what's wrong with that?Why is everyone blaming me for this!

"I want to say it!" She ignored me and continued on her own, "Maybe you think I'm not qualified to say this, but I'm still your friend, so I must say it!"

"Friend?" As if I was stuck by something, I asked sarcastically, "You still regard me as a friend? Don't you already have a new friend? If you are still my friend, why haven't you said a word to me for so many days? In other words, I can’t see you when I need a friend, but now you want to teach me?”

"What are you talking about?" She retorted in surprise, "When did I not come when you needed me? Obviously you haven't said a word to me for so many days!"

"you do not know any think!"

"Then—please—tell me," said Sylvia irritably, "and please don't lose your temper, please? Don't blame me for irrelevant things!"

I stared at her motionless, my words churning like a flood of rage, my mouth shut like a floodgate.what can I say?The secrets I've gone to great lengths to keep secret?I have no courage, but if she doesn't know this, it's useless to say anything.I vaguely feel that if this continues, sooner or later our relationship will be buried in this secret.

"You don't understand," I said weakly, shaking my head, and suddenly felt a trace of surprising familiarity. Isn't this what my mother often said to me?

"Then explain!"

I hesitated for a moment, then smiled miserably: "But maybe, after you know the truth, you will never want to talk to me again."

"Why do you say that? What happened?"

I took a deep breath and said, "Just now, I quarreled with my mother again..."

"What's the matter! Wait—what does 'just now' mean? Could it be that Madam Ravenclaw sent you a Howler letter?" She wondered, her eyes swept to the ground, as if looking for the burnt wreckage of the Howler letter.

"No," I smiled palely, clutching the corner of the bed sheet tightly, trying to regulate my breathing, but my voice still trembled uncontrollably, "my mother is not Mrs. Ravenclaw, I mean Ravenclaw Professor Winclaw-" I saw Sylvia's eyes widen and her mouth turn into an incredible O.

"—Rowena Ravenclaw. I am her daughter, and she is my mother."

I looked up at her shocked expression, smiled in relief, and suddenly felt a burst of relief, as if throwing away a heavy burden.No matter what she thinks, as long as the words are spoken, it is irreversible.

"I know what you want to ask," I decided to say everything before I regretted it, "but I think we need to change places. Susan and the others should be back soon."

The sun has been setting for a long time, and the dense stars are twinkling overhead.The lights of the castle were reflected on the surface of the black lake, as quiet as another night sky.

We came outside the castle, lay on the grass by the lake, and told Sylvia all about my past.From childhood, the cold house, crying nights, dark memories... For the first time in my life, I confide to others everything that I have tried so hard to hide.I had no idea that the feeling of relief could be so good.

"If you hadn't told me this yourself, I would rather die than believe it was true."

"Probably no one would believe it...the great Ravenclaw..." I whispered, gazing at the sparkling lake, "I wish it wasn't true."

"Helena, you should have told me earlier that it's too hard to keep everything to yourself," Sylvia sighed.

I smiled wryly and shook my head: "How dare I? I just want to live like an ordinary person."

"Then... may I venture to ask... who is your father?"

"I do not know."

"Then...Professor Slytherin..."

I raised my eyebrows: "You think so too?"

"No—no, that's not what I meant," said Sylvia nervously. "I just heard it said. I always thought it was nonsense, but..."

"—but since the rumors that I'm Professor Ravenclaw's illegitimate daughter are true, maybe this is too?" I pointed out sharply, and she looked even more flustered.

"I didn't mean to offend you—"

"You didn't offend me," I said sullenly, "but to be honest, I doubted it, too. But I really don't know. I asked her when I was a child, and she wouldn't tell me anything except that my father had died."

"I'm very sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for," I shrugged indifferently, "it's been many years, I'm used to it. But...can I ask you to keep it a secret for me? You won't look down on me because of this, it doesn't mean others won't. I I don't want others to know."

"Of course," Searle chuckled and squeezed my hand hard. "As long as you want it to be a secret, it always will be."

That night, we cleared up any misunderstandings and cleared up any barriers.Her smile made me feel at ease at last.Girls' relationships always grow stronger with sharing some secrets.From that day on, I started telling her everything without reservation, and she treated me the same way.Our relationship has surpassed that of close friends who talk to each other, and even those who are related by blood.I once firmly believed that as long as it was something that she needed to keep secret, no second person in the world would know about it.

The unhappiness between my mother and I undoubtedly deepened the rift between us, but it was also a blessing in disguise that allowed me to untie the grudge between me and Sylvia.When family affection made me feel disheartened about the world, friendship once again made me see warmth and light.The balance of gain and loss is always wobbly.But at that moment, I felt that fate finally favored me once, which made me feel warm.