desensitization therapy

Summer is always dull and brisk, the heat makes people drowsy, and it is difficult to distinguish between illusion and reality in front of the computer screen.

Fang Zhilian got off work an hour and a half earlier than usual, and happened to miss the evening rush hour, but there was still no shortage of vehicles on the road.He was stuck at an intersection, a car in front of him stopped for some reason, and the cars behind him were scrambling to honk their horns, and the sound was louder than the sound.

He tapped the steering wheel with his knuckles rhythmically, feeling a little restless.

Such emotions have been brought to the restaurant. The restaurant Fang Huo booked is in a popular business district not close to the studio.

When Fang Zhilian arrived, Fang Huo was confirming the location with the waiter at the front desk, his upper body leaned forward slightly, and he couldn't stop talking, with a slightly impatient expression on his face.

The waiter opposite Fang Huo was at a loss.

Fang Zhilian looked at him not far away for a while, and in all fairness, even though he hadn't seen him for a few years, Fang Huo's current face could still vaguely see the good appearance of his youth.If it weren't for this good appearance, he probably wouldn't have been able to be proud for so many years.

But it was fatal when he opened his mouth.

Fang Zhilian walked over, deliberately turned his face away from Fang Huo, and said to the waiter without squinting: "The appointment time is 05:30, private room, surnamed Fang."

The private room has a tatami layout, and the window is facing the Japanese garden full of Zen, and you can see a row of blue gravel and black pine.

Fang Huo didn't know what kind of score he was displaying, and he refused to speak Mandarin properly even when ordering food. He had a not-so-nice voice due to his heavy smoking all year round, and he deliberately used his accent to speak dialect, saying The waiter opposite had a clouded expression.

Like a chattering male duck, Fang Zhilian watched the waiter take away the menu, thinking blankly.

Of course, Fang Huo didn't know what was going on in his heart. Last second, he was complaining vulgarly that these waiters couldn't understand human words, but now he changed into a kind smile: "Dad, I haven't seen you for a few years, how long is this time?" Stay for a few days and take you to eat a few meals."

Maybe it's because people gradually cherish family affection as they get older. Not long ago, Fang Zhilian received a rare call from Fang Huo. Fang Huo told him on the phone that he would come to Yanjing to see him.

It was less than two months since they broke up on the phone last time, Fang Zhilian flatly refused.But I don't know what Fang Huo said to Cheng Lei again, it was not a calm conversation after all.Two days later, Cheng Lei also called and asked him to meet Fang Huo more or less.

So Fang Zhilian finally came.

"No," Fang Zhilian twitched the corner of his mouth, "You should go back early, I've been very busy recently, and I don't have much time to eat."

He was not polite, but Fang Huo's face changed for a moment, and he still suppressed it: "It's better to be busy, you are young and don't work hard to make more money, what will you do when you are old?"

Fang Zhilian ignored Fang Huo, and stared down at the small ripples in the tea cup.

Fang Huo's expression finally improved a bit, thinking that he agreed with his words, and leaned back easily.

"Dad is getting old too, and in a few years he will completely steal tea at home." Fang Huo also took a sip of tea and said with emotion, "Fortunately, I confessed you no matter how difficult it was back then. Look at you now Have a good time, Dad will be at ease."

Donate it no matter how difficult it is?Fang Zhilian suddenly wanted to laugh.

He looked up at Fang Huo's closed lips, and some dusty memories were pulled out from the corner.He thought about those few years, Fang Huo ignored him because of his wife's affair, worked all night as a restaurant kitchen after class, unaffordable medicines, and hallucinations that had side effects but were precious.

At that time, Fang Zhilian didn't know who he was competing with. He didn't want to ask Cheng Lei for money, and he didn't want to ask Fang Huo who had been turning a blind eye to him since childhood.

But Fang Huo dared to say boldly that fortunately, no matter how hard it was in those few years, he was confessed.

The tea was still steaming, the waiter opened the door and quietly served the food.

Fang Huo was still chattering, probably because he really had nothing to say. He began to reminisce about the past, such as the embarrassing story that Fang Zhilian was told by the grandmother in the courtyard when he was a child. The first thing he did after falling down was to lick the half-melted popsicle in his hand. .

Speaking of this, Fang Huo couldn't help laughing, Fang Zhilian was expressionless, and he really didn't understand what Fang Huo wanted to say.

But at the end of the meal, Fang Huo didn't say anything else, as if he really just invited him to a meal, talking about boring memories, or complaining.

When it comes to Fang Zhilian's younger sister whom he has never met, Fang Huo is still vague. He only said with a little disgust that she followed her brainless mother, a girl, and he didn't want to mention it.

"In short," Fang Huo suggested to him, "you should also be of marriageable age, and find a partner early. I'm just your son, and I will leave everything that should be left to your small family. Don't worry."

Fang Zhilian smiled.

He finally understood that older people don't cherish family affection, but care about continuation.

Even the worst genes.

"I'm not worried," Fang Zhilian smiled sincerely at Fang Huo, "I won't get married either."

At this moment, they were walking out along the row of blue gravel roads. Fang Huo had just paid the bill, and came out facing the wind with a satisfied face.

"What do you mean?" Fang Huo squinted his eyes, but still didn't understand what he meant.

It turned out that Cheng Lei hadn't told Fang Huo yet, Fang Zhilian thought, if he had told Fang Huo earlier, Fang Huo probably wouldn't have come to Yanjing to contact such an unnecessary family relationship.

"Literally," he laughs, "I'm gay."

Fang Huo turned his head suddenly, his face livid, as if he didn't hear what he was saying at all, or couldn't believe it.

An explanation may be needed at this point.

But Fang Zhilian was too lazy to explain, so he just smiled at Huo Huo without emotion, even omitting the polite goodbye, and walked straight forward.

The bus stop at sunset was covered with a layer of bright colors. Under the stop sign, Song Feijue stood upright, wearing a black mask, and turned his face slightly when he heard footsteps.

The sunlight was too eccentric, and the shadow cast on his side face was just right, and those blindfolded eyes opened.

With a lazy expression, Song Feijue brushed away the non-existing folds on the corner of his clothes, raised his eyes and asked, "Going home?"

Fang Zhilian liked it very much when he said go home, go back to their home in this tone.

"Okay," Fang Zhilian said, "Let's go back and digest."

It took nearly an hour to walk home from the restaurant, but fortunately, I was not in a hurry, taking a slow walk was considered a walk.

Song Feijue knew that Fang Zhilian was having dinner with Fang Huo today, but he didn't take the initiative to ask. Fang Zhilian didn't want him to know the unpleasantness, so he said a few words casually, and then turned the topic to Old Zhao.

It's also amazing to say that Fang Zhilian really didn't know what Song Feijue was busy with before, and he didn't know much about what he said about making money by speculating in stocks. I just learned a little bit.

Since leaving Wu Muwei's company, Song Feijue has started to do investment consulting in a not-so-big financial institution. He also helps people like Lao Zhao to guide the stock market in his spare time. Generally speaking, he is fairly stable.

But after Fang Zhilian really found out, he still couldn't be happy.

"Didn't Lao Zhao say that he wanted you to vote for that?" Fang Zhilian racked his brains to recall, "Ripple? Do you want to try it?"

"Do not want to."

"I still have money...Really, I saved a lot before."

"Ah."

"What do you want to do?"

Song Feijue stopped, Fang Zhilian pulled the clothes behind him, and took the trouble to bring up the topic that he had talked about many times: "I hope you can study if you want to study, invest in whatever you want to invest, and don't be restrained , including myself. You are so smart, you can do everything well, but I only want you to do what you want to do most."

"What about you?" Song Feijue turned his head, instead of answering directly, he asked a new question, "What do you want to do?"

"Me?" Fang Zhilian was a little surprised.

"It's fine as it is now," he took a step forward, grabbed Song Feijue's fingers and interlocked with him, half-jokingly said, "I don't regret that I didn't learn to take pictures, anyway, I don't have much talent."

It happened to be an alley, Song Feijue pulled off his mask, lit a cigarette, and looked a little tired.He has been suffering from a cold for the past few days, and his voice is extremely hoarse.

Fang Zhilian's double standard is very good. Hearing Fang Huo's voice after smoking for a long time, he felt like a male duck, and Song Feijue's voice was low and hoarse, but he only felt sexy. He stopped and said, "I want it too."

Song Feijue refused, he sipped the cigarette loosely, and lowered his eyes to Fang Zhilian.

"A kiss is fine." Fang Zhilian chose the next best thing, even though he knew that Song Feijue would definitely reject him again.

He had a cold after all.

The white smoke wove into a net and slowly climbed up the old brick wall.

Song Feijue extinguished the half-smoked cigarette, raised his hand and threw it into the trash can, and put on the mask again.

Then he leaned down and touched Fang Zhilian's brow with his mask-covered lips.

"That's fine now."

He finally answered Fang Zhilian's question just now, using Fang Zhilian's original words.

Going home together after a busy day, kissing through a mask in a small alley with no one at sunset, ordinary and mediocre, this is fine now.

"I'm afraid you will regret it, or you will regret your decision in the long run."

Fang Zhilian foolishly tapped the hot brows with his fingertips, and looked up at him.

But Song Feijue let go of Fang Zhilian, and took half a step back.

"Regret?" He looked relaxed, as if he was thinking about something, but he didn't seem to think about anything, "It's really too pale to say no regrets in the face of regrets, but there is no need to talk about regrets after doing everything possible to change the process and results. gone."

Fang Zhilian was still thinking about his words, but Song Feijue had already raised his hand, and the fingers of his right hand rested on the back of his left hand, leaving a thin gap.

"Look at the wall." Song Feijue reminded casually.

Fang Zhilian was really looking at his fingers, and after hearing his reminder, he looked at the brick wall opposite with a confused face.

A shadow of a puppy's hand was vaguely reflected on the gray brick wall in the afterglow. When Song Feijue moved his finger, the ear of the puppy in the shadow of the hand moved too.

"Are you happier?" Song Feijue asked him.

happy?Fang Zhilian looked at the hand shadow puppy, then turned to look at Song Feijue's focused profile.

The hand shadow puppy on the brick wall approached Fang Zhilian's shadow, opened its mouth, as if kissing Fang Zhilian's shadow on it.

"He's rubbing against you."

Song Feijue still had the same indifferent expression, speaking the most childish words without changing his face, the corners of his eyes shone with a subtle light, which seemed extraordinarily vivid.

Like an unhappy puppy running home with its tail down, he sees sweet milk, soft bread, and fragrant ham for dinner today.

The master never asks: "What's the matter, why are you unhappy?"

But the owner will hug the puppy when it wags its tail again after dinner, and ask the puppy in a very gentle tone: "Are you happier?"

Fang Zhilian is that puppy who is more than a little happy.

He was stunned for several seconds before spreading out his palms, bending them, and shining them on the side of the hand shadow puppy.

"happy."

The two shadows were very close, but Fang Zhilian's shadow was not so much a hand shadow, it was more like a bent palm, and there was no animal shadow at all.

Fang Zhilian noticed Song Feijue's gaze. He probably wanted to ask what kind of animal it was, but in the end he turned his gaze away and didn't ask anything.

On the wall, the shadow of the moon was even more curved, next to the shadow of the puppy's hand.

Fang Zhilian was inexplicably excited. He shrank his thumb inward, trying to make the shadow look more like the moon.

The puppy fell into the moon.He remembered that WeChat signature from a long time ago, but he didn't expect that after so many years, it would become a prophecy.

The author says: