desensitization therapy

05:30am.

Fang Zhilian woke up from a nightmare, opened his eyes only to find that Crescent Moon was lying on his chest safely.

Since returning home after ending her wandering career, Yueya has gained at least three catties.At this moment, a big lump came up, leaving aside the panic caused by the nightmare, Fang Zhilian always felt an indescribable tightness in his chest.

Crescent Moon acted nonchalantly, and sniffed his chin closely.

Fang Zhilian hugged Crescent Moon to the side of the pillow, turned on the lamp again, then sat up and stared blankly for a while.

It's been less than an hour since he fell asleep.

The text message page on the phone was still stuck on the two messages sent an hour ago, Fang Zhilian flipped up a few pages with his fingers, and returned to the original position.

Number one: I seem to have a fever.

Article [-]: I want to eat canned yellow peaches.

Song Feijue didn't reply.

Fang Zhilian hugged his knees and thought about countless possibilities, but he still couldn't press the call button.

Crescent Moon arched and arched on the side of the pillow, and finally found a most suitable position.

"He promised me," Fang Zhilian rolled up the hem of his short sleeves like an obsessive-compulsive disorder, and then smoothed it down little by little. He lowered his head and murmured to himself, "Maybe he just fell asleep, right? ?”

Of course Crescent Moon would not answer him.

Fang Zhilian muttered a few words to himself, then fell silent, and lay back on the bed.

However, this time he didn't feel sleepy anyway, he tossed and turned on the bed for a long time, and finally couldn't stand even the crescent moon, so he jumped out of the bed lightly and walked away on catwalks.

It is already sunrise.

Fang Zhilian sighed, he opened the curtains with his bare feet, and in an instant, a beam of drunken light poured in through the gap.

The phone on the bed rang.

Fang Zhilian turned his head and saw a moon call note jumping on the screen.

He didn't care about the sunrise, he rushed to the bed and pressed the switch.

The knee accidentally hit the corner of the wooden bed, but Fang Zhilian seemed unconscious, only his face wrinkled slightly: "Auntie is okay..."

"Break up." The voice on the other side said.

Song Feijue's voice was as calm as ever, as if talking about breaking up was as simple as saying "where will we meet tomorrow" for him.

For a few seconds, Fang Zhilian's mind was blank, unable to respond.

"What's wrong with you?" Fang Zhilian probably didn't notice that his voice was trembling all the time, but Song Feijue heard it clearly, "Where's your father? Are you at home now? I'll go find you, you..."

"Stop looking for me again."

"Didn't you promise me?"

"..."

When Fang Zhilian asked this sentence, tears also fell. He wiped it with his arms in a panic, but it seemed that he couldn't finish it.

Song Feijue's breathing was very deep. If Fang Zhilian stood in front of him, he would see the unconcealable emotion in those dark eyes.

The other side was silent for a few seconds, and Song Feijue repeated what he had just said: "Let's break up."

He didn't hang up the phone.

This time the silence lasted longer, and Fang Zhilian's tears fell drop by drop on the bed sheet, fainting out in different shades.His throat seemed rusty, and he couldn't even utter a single word.

"No", or "Don't break up", he couldn't say it.

Just like a child who is obsessed with his parents' promise to buy toys, knowing that the other party has broken the contract, knowing that the other party has changed his mind.He didn't dare to fight, so he could only repeat the invalid promise over and over again.

The silent silence is like the countdown of an hourglass.

Fang Zhilian finally spoke at the moment when the hourglass stopped. His voice was extremely hoarse, but he was still stubborn: "I won't break up."

The noise of electricity passed through the microphone, rustling.

One second, two seconds.He heard Song Feijue's lowered voice: "You said that."

"Speak with numbers, Fang Zhilian."

"Then did you mean what you said?" Fang Zhilian shouted hoarsely.

However, this time Song Feijue did not answer his question, but hung up the phone without hesitation.

Almost at the same time Song Feijue hung up the phone, Fang Zhilian grabbed the phone and ran downstairs.

Crescent Moon, who had just returned from drinking water on the stairs, was startled by him, and her tail suddenly became thicker.Fang Zhilian didn't care to pay attention to others, and stumbled to the porch, almost falling down.

The more disturbed the mind, the easier it is to make mistakes. Fang Zhilian's hands were shaking all the time, and he entered the wrong password several times. When the door lock issued an alarm, he heard a voice behind him: "Where are you going?"

Fang Zhilian turned around in a daze.

It's Cheng Lei.

Cheng Lei was wearing a dark gray nightgown, without makeup, and her face was gloomy.She stood behind Fang Zhilian with her chest folded, staring at Fang Zhilian's fingers on the door lock.

Fang Zhilian was so full of eyes on the door lock that he didn't even have time to find a reasonable explanation, so he turned his eyes back to the combination lock.

He re-entered a series of numbers, and the noise of the combination lock alarm finally stopped.

But Cheng Lei grabbed his arm.

"say!"

Unlike her usual calm and indifferent voice, Cheng Lei's voice was full of anger and despair that had never been seen before.

She didn't give Fang Zhilian time to react, and walked straight to the living room with his arms around her.

Cheng Lei's nails were very long, deeply embedded in Fang Zhilian's skin, causing him pain.

But Fang Zhilian could no longer feel the pain. He watched Cheng Lei lift up an iPad, and then hit the ground heavily - the lit screen fell to pieces, and the screen was full of chat records.

The sound of things falling on the ground was loud, but no matter whether it was downstairs or upstairs, there was no sound at all.

Fang Zhilian finally remembered dully, just now when Aunt Chang opened the door for him with a hesitant and somewhat disgusted expression, and the light in Cheng Lei's room was still on at four o'clock in the morning.

"If it wasn't for Aunt Chang who found out after cleaning up the room," Cheng Lei grabbed his hand with blanched knuckles, "How long are you going to lie to me?"

Fang Zhilian replied mechanically: "I didn't intend to lie to you."

Cheng Lei's expression froze on her face: "Did you intend to lie to me not to go abroad, or did you intend to lie to me that you are abnormal and have sex with men?"

She seemed to be crying, but also seemed to be laughing.

"You hate mom, are you taking revenge on mom in this way?"

unusual.

revenge?

Fang Zhilian seemed to be unable to understand Cheng Lei's words anymore. Everything happened so suddenly tonight, as if the weight hanging in the air finally fell, smashing the intact peaceful surface to pieces.Everything is getting narrower and narrower in an unexpected direction.

He watched Cheng Lei slumped on the ground in tears, unable to say a word of denial.

This was the first time Cheng Lei showed a gaffe.

"You hate me? Do you know what I lived in those years?" She was almost hoarse, "I wasted my best years to give birth to you, and I had to start from scratch as an listing consultant when I came back! What about Fang Huo? How do you think he is? Before he remarried, he had no money. He just played mahjong and asked me for money every day. Everything you need for food and housing was given to you by working hard outside! In the end, you hate Me, want to take revenge on me?"

Cheng Lei laughed until tears came out.She propped herself up on the floor, shaking her head uncontrollably, as if mocking herself.

"Now you think that Fang Huo supports you to study abroad, is it good for you? You think I treat you badly, and remind me again and again, and now you simply go to have sex with men, just to see me like this, right? ?”

No, no, all wrong.Fang Zhilian stared blankly at Cheng Lei, he wanted to refute, but he asked another sentence.

A question he had thought about many times.

"Why didn't you take me away?"

After a long silence, Cheng Lei wiped away her tears and stood up unsteadily.

She seemed unable to restrain the laughter in her chest, coughed and laughed, but answered another question.

Ask yourself, when Cheng Lei saw the chat history on the iPad, her first reaction was to be in a trance.

She was thinking, if she had helped Wen Peitang get a divorce back then, the result would have been different.Whether Wen Peitang will not become what he is now, will her son not meet Song Feijue, and the chain reaction behind will no longer exist.

"Break it," Cheng Lei turned her face away, "You thought you were taking revenge on me, but you were lied to by him from the beginning to the end."

Fang Zhilian asked hesitantly, "...what?"

Cheng Lei seemed to have let go of all the strength in her body. She slowly sat down on the sofa and answered, "Song Feijue."

This name was a bit awkward for her to pronounce. Before that, she had never had any impression of this name until the parent meeting.

The little boy who accompanied Wen Peitang is not clear in her memory. Cheng Lei vaguely remembered that the boy 11 years ago had a thick bandage on his forehead and lost his voice for a short time due to mental stimulation.

And 11 years later, that little boy turned into a still taciturn, but thinner and more handsome boy.

Cheng Lei saw them holding hands behind their backs, but soon, Song Feijue let go of Fang Zhilian's hand, and greeted her with a smile and an unwavering voice.

Fang Zhilian almost thought he heard it wrong.

Cheng Lei spoke very slowly. She restored everything that happened in that small office 11 years ago without any omissions.

Fang Zhilian listened to her quietly. He thought of many things, related and unrelated.For example, Song Feijue let go of his hand that day, for example the phrase Song Feijue said "Can't you be responsible for yourself", or for example the first kiss in the snow.

Did Song Feijue ever think about revenge?Or the reason they are together, itself is the beginning of revenge.

Fang Zhilian didn't know.He raised his eyes and asked Cheng Lei softly, "Why did you tell Aunt Wen those things?"

"That was my job, and I couldn't do anything under the circumstances." Until now, Cheng Lei raised her face, still deceiving herself, "The one who makes the final decision is herself."

"You have a way," Fang Zhilian's bangs were wet on his forehead, he looked up at Cheng Lei blankly, "Your job is to help Aunt Wen win the lawsuit."

Cheng Lei closed her eyes in vain and said nothing.

For a long time, no one made a sound.

"Mom." Fang Zhilian's voice was hoarse.

He slowly bent his knees, knelt on the ground, and looked at Cheng Lei from an upward angle.

Whether it's revenge or not, it doesn't matter anymore.

"It's still too late, you help Aunt Wen."

"Help him," Fang Zhilian bit the tip of his tongue forcefully, his mouth was filled with the smell of blood, from the base of his tongue to his heart, "he promised me."

The author says: