Su Huaijun

I have lived in Shushan for more than a hundred years, and even though I have Wen Heng by my side, I still feel unsatisfied.

I have had many dreams. I dreamed that I was dancing a sword in a courtyard where catkins were fluttering, and someone was playing the piano by the side.

Shushan does not grow willows, and Qingqiu does not grow willows. In my impression, weeping willows were planted only in the mansion of the beautiful fairy who played the piano when he and his second brother went to the Heavenly Palace.

I dreamed that I was holding someone in my arms, and he turned his head and didn't look at me, his ears were red with shame, I didn't recognize him, but I had the urge to keep hugging him.

I dreamed that I was lying on the bed, and there was someone sleeping next to him. He was shaking violently, and I couldn't resist hugging him. The faint fragrance on his body was really nice.

I dreamed that I was transformed into my original form, lying in someone's arms, shaking my head, I couldn't see that person's face clearly, but I saw that he smiled very beautifully, as if he could melt people's hearts.

I dreamed of a theater stage, the people on the stage finished singing a song, I stood below the stage and waved to him, but he avoided looking at me.

It's strange, that person is clearly dressed as my daughter's family, why do I always think it's a man?

I dreamed that I was going to release the krathongs. I was alone, but I bought two greedily, and I didn’t know who the other one was for.

I dreamed that I was wearing a wedding dress and said to heaven and earth: "Don't ask about the past life, don't ask for the afterlife, just this life. I would rather betray all living beings than never betray my heart."

I dreamed that I was recuperating in a room, and I wanted to go to Wenqing, but the person sitting on the couch wouldn't let me go, it's really annoying.

I dreamed that Wen Qing died in my arms. I cut off my own fox tail in exchange for his life, and then I was taken away by a man. I couldn’t see the man’s face clearly, only the weeping willows in the yard and the big chessboard with the chessboard on it. Stone.

Tail docking must be painful, right?Why don't I feel pain?

Maybe it's because there is no pain in the dream.

But why is that man trembling and unable to stand?

Why is he holding onto my hand?

What is he saying?

He said: "Su Huai, don't be afraid, with me here, you will be fine." As he spoke, he passed out.

I suddenly wanted to go and hug him.

I dreamed that there was a person in front of Zhuxian Terrace, he smiled with me, and said: "That's all, if you like it, I will follow you." But he turned around and jumped off Zhuxian Terrace.

A sentence echoed on Zhuxian Terrace: "From now on, I will reincarnate in the world, don't tell me to meet you again."

I dream of a person, I always dream of a person, dreaming back and forth, but I just can't see what he looks like, I just can't remember who he is.

I remember his good-looking smile, and the disappointed look in his eyes when he looked at me. Whenever I wake up at night, I always hope that person is by my side.

I seem to have forgotten a lot of things, or misremembered a lot of things, like drinking under a tree, like rafting in a lake, or walking by the edge of a fairyland. The person who has been with me in my memory is Wen Heng , but I always feel that it is not him.

I remember Wen Qing said to me that the feeling of liking someone is to miss him day and night, to be happy when he sees him, and to lose his soul when he doesn’t see him.

Both the eldest sister and the second brother said that Wen Heng is the one in my life, and I really like Wen Heng very much, and I can't allow others to hurt him.

However, Wen Heng is by my side every day, who is that person who makes me think about it day and night, as if I have lost my mind all day long?

Who is that person who told me to protect him?

Who is that person who calls me like a spring breeze and makes me feel at ease?

And who do I look up at every night?

Everyone hides it from me, I think, he must be the most important person to me, that's why I refuse to forget even if I have the remaining thoughts.

If he really said that he would protect me, I don't know if I cut off my tail now, can I ask him to show up?

At night, I dismissed Wen Heng and came to the back mountain alone.

The moonlight was just right, but it was a little chilly.

I called out my own fox tail and held the Linghua sword in my hand. After some hesitation, I pulled my own fox tail, closed my eyes, and prepared to cut it off.

The surrounding wind blew up, and before I could make a move, the Ling Hua sword had already been thrown to the ground.

I turned around happily, just in time to see Qin Yin withdrawing his sword.

The second elder brother behind him said angrily: "What are you doing? Who offended you and made you so upset? The majestic Suhuai Shangxian in Qingqiu is now like a girl's family. Do you want to risk your life?"

I said anxiously: "Second brother, I'm not overthinking, I'm just looking for someone, someone who is very important to me."

"Why do you need to use this method to find someone? Could it be that the person you are looking for is waiting for you in the underworld? Then you can just go down and look for it. Why bother?"

Although the second brother is always very strict with me, in fact the second brother cares about me more than the eldest sister, but his temperament is like this.

I remember someone said to me: "Although Su Zongjun is sometimes strict, it is for your own good. Think about it, Su Yue is not good at martial arts, and his immortal skills are not as good as yours, and he is not like your mother or your father." Now, if Su Zongjun does not establish a prestige in the clan, how can Su Yue Shangxian succeed the clan leader in the future, how can he restrain those clansmen and the many monsters in Qingqiu? Who will obey her?"

It's just that who said this to me, how can I not remember?

I put away the Ling Hua sword, walked up to my second brother with my head down, and whispered: "It was my fault, you should punish me."

The second brother sighed, touched my head, and said softly: "You can tell the second brother what you want to do. I will help you if I can, and I won't stop you if I can't. How can you take your own money? Life is a joke, let us worry?"

"Then you can tell me, who is the person in my dream?"

The second brother asked doubtfully, "The person in your dream?"

I said: "I told you, there are weeping willows planted in his yard, he can play the piano, and he can also play chess. He has a nice smile, and there is always a faint fragrance on his body, which smells good. He seems a little thin , but I like hugging him, and I like being hugged by him. By the way, he also has a folding fan with a painting of weeping willows."

The second brother was stunned for a while, then smiled and said, "I haven't seen you so happy for a long time."

He looked behind me, then back at me.

I asked, "Then can you tell me?"

The second brother shook his head and said: "This is just your dream, how can I know? There really is such a person in the world..."

He glanced behind me again, and when I turned around, there was no one else except Qin Yin standing upright under the moon.

I almost felt that Qin Yin was that person, but I thought about it, how could it be possible, I meet Qin Yin every day, why have I ever seen him playing the piano and reciting poems?

I looked back at my second brother again, his eyes were full of distress, and he said: "Even if there is such a person, you must have no fate, that's why you can't think about it just now. Why are you clinging to a person who has no fate? "

I shook my head and said anxiously: "No. He can suffer the pain of tail docking for me, how can I be a heartless person?"

The second brother was terrified when he heard what I said, and hurriedly asked me, "When did you lose your tail? Why didn't you tell us?"

I faltered and said, "No...not broken."

The second elder brother had a dark face, and said with a flick of his sleeves: "You dare to make fun of this kind of thing!"

I said aggrievedly: "I'm not joking, he really suffered the pain of tail docking for me, but it was only in a dream."

The second elder brother sighed, and said, "Go back to your room and rest, don't think about it any more."

Qin Yin stepped forward and said to his second elder brother, "Please, my lord."

The second brother left with his hands behind his back.

I was walking on the road, feeling a little uncomfortable.

I murmured softly: "I'll just be told to go back to my room to rest. Once I rest, I won't be full of him in my dreams, so how can I not think about it."

Qin Yin walked towards him, and said with a smile: "What's wrong with Shangxian, so listless? I just heard Wen Heng say that you went to the back mountain, and I thought you must have gone to eat peaches, so you should be happy. "

I said: "Why don't you make fun of me, you were also in the back mountain just now, didn't you see it?"

Qin Yin was stunned for a moment, then coughed lightly, and said in embarrassment: "I saw it, it's my fault, I shouldn't have said these things. Shangxian should rest earlier."

After saying that, he left.

I suddenly felt something was wrong, didn't Qin Yin send his second brother out, why did he come back so soon?

Even if they walked fast, they shouldn't have come from this direction.

It suddenly occurred to me that just now in the back mountain, the second brother and Qin Yin both saw that I was going to cut off my tail. If we were eager, the second brother should be more anxious, how could Qin Yin be a step behind?

That person is not Qin Yin, that person is the man of my dreams!

"Qin Yin" returned to his original appearance after walking away with his second elder brother, and he was a handsome fairy.

The second elder brother said to him: "You are all in his heart, and you can't let him go in your heart, why bother to torture him and yourself like this?"

The man said: "Mr. Su Zong forgot, I am the Wenqu Xingjun in the sky, and I should put the Dao as the most important thing. How can I bind myself with my children's selfishness?"

The second elder brother stopped, and he said: "Mr. Tianquan, Mr. Wenquxing, even if I beg you. For the sake of our friendship for tens of thousands of years, why don't you let him once? Isn't it because you don't like me?" Shecai didn't drink Mengpo soup, why did she pretend to be heartless to lie to herself?"

The man suddenly smiled, his expression was a bit bitter, he said: "Su Zongjun, Su Zongjun, do you know that I have protected him for tens of thousands of years and depended on him in everything, but I never thought about the cause and effect with him?"

"I know."

"Do you know that I am willing to pave the way for him to be with Lord Wen Qing, and change his life even at the risk of my own life?"

"I know too."

"Then do you know how many times he hurt me?"

This time the second brother did not answer.

He continued: "If I hadn't read Su Huai's fate, I wouldn't know that my tens of thousands of years of friendship would not be worth the short time Mr. Wen Qing spent with him. Even if I would be willing to suffer the death penalty for him Pain, he only has Lord Wen Qing in his heart, and my Xuanming Palace is just a place for him to heal his wounds."

He smiled bitterly and said: "But I thought, even so, it's good if he can live. If he is still alive, even if Xuanming Palace is just a rest station, as long as he laughs with me, I will be willing. But what about him? You can pierce my heart with a sword in a dream for Wen Qingjun, and you can also cut off your tail and give up your immortal essence for Wen Qingjun, but you can't allow me to lie to him once, so that he can't save Shen Wenqing. He said those unfeeling words At that time, did you ever think that I might not be able to bear the serious injury to save him? If I hadn't jumped to Zhuxiantai, I am afraid that he would never talk to me again in this life."

Presumably he had been brooding over that matter.

At the beginning, the second brother also trained me severely after he knew about it, but I couldn't listen to it at the time, and the second brother was also very disappointed about this.

Maybe it was because he felt that what he had said was too much, he took a breath, calmed down his emotions, and said: "In the life when I went down to earth as a human, he really took care of me, I am very grateful, and I also gave him his life back It’s clear. Mr. Su Zong, I didn’t drink Mengpo’s soup, it’s not because I’m reluctant, I’m afraid that if I drink a bowl of Mengpo’s soup, the scar will be healed and forget the pain, and I will suffer again.”

"Si Ming Xingjun went to Xuanming Palace just now and said that he was going to cut off his tail. You are so anxious, doesn't it mean that you still care about him?"

He smiled, and said lightly: "What can I care about now? It's just that I have protected him for tens of thousands of years, and I haven't gotten used to it for a while. When I go back, I will go to Si Ming Xingjun and tell him to see him again next time." What happened to Su Huai Shangxian, just report to Qingqiu, don't come to my Xuanming Palace to say these things."

The second elder brother asked: "Does Lord Tianquan really want to do this?"

He nodded, raised the corners of his mouth habitually, and said, "It's late at night, it's time to go back."