Forbidden

At the end of the 80s, Jiang Yu was born in a small county in the south.

The mother is the daughter of a farmer. She dropped out of junior high school and has little education, but she looks pretty.When I was a teenager, I went to work in the county, and met my father who opened a small shop, a man named Jiang Jianyin.

He not only runs a small shop, but is also a skilled chef.

There was a popular saying at the time: Those who engage in atomic bombs are not as good as those who sell tea eggs.It means that there was a storm of doing business in that era, and there were opportunities everywhere. As long as you dare to venture and work hard, you can make a lot of money. Doing a small business can earn more than doing scientific research and academics.

At that time, my father was considered a favorite, with a tall figure, good looks, and a little money, and there were many women who liked him.

After his mother got married to him, many people around her envied her. They all said that she was married well, it was true love, and she would definitely get richer and richer in the future.

If it wasn't true love, why would Xiangbobo fall in love with her among so many suitors with good conditions?Mother was convinced of this.

But during her pregnancy, her father cheated on her.

For an illiterate and illiterate mother, it was like her sky had fallen, and she had to make amends.She often heard people say that "he will take care of him when he has a child", so she pinned all her hopes on the unborn child.

Then Jiang Yu came to this world.

she is a girl.

But the mother wanted a boy to save the marriage and make up for her "heaven".

She named her Jiang Wanyin, which means "to restore the cause".

Simple and easy to understand.

But his father did not look back because of Jiang Yu's birth. On the contrary, the situation became worse and worse. The family had a big quarrel for three days and a small quarrel for five days. Jiang Yu's life before the age of five was spent in endless quarrels and beatings. of.

The mother couldn't control the father, so she vented her anger on her, controlled her, and watched the little girl let herself be bullied without any power to fight back. The pleasure made people crazy.

When Jiang Yu was five years old, everything was over.

Her parents divorced and no one wanted her. She was thrown to her grandmother and lived in the countryside for several years.

Grandma didn't like her, and asked her to do a lot of work every day, pressing water and chopping firewood, driving chickens to feed ducks, and she was not allowed to eat if she couldn't finish.As long as she is disobedient, I will take her and throw her into a small black house in the mountains and forests. She will not die of hunger and thirst for a day, but she will be subdued.

When he was ten years old, his mother, whom he had not seen for a long time, suddenly came back.She remarried to a repairman in the town and gave birth to a son who needed someone to take care of her, so she thought of her daughter raised in the country.

Jiang Yu was brought into a reorganized family.

She thought she escaped the nightmare, but instead just jumped into another nightmare.

At my grandmother's house, I just work. Here, besides working, I also have to accommodate my younger brother. She is his servant, taking care of him, eating, drinking, and messing around.

The mother especially disliked her name, but refused to change it, saying that she wanted to remember the ruthless scumbag, and also regarded her as a shame.And because she grew up taller than her peers and had a broad frame, she was always told that she was not a girl, that she would not be able to marry in the future, hated her, and hated her.

When she graduated from junior high school, her mother asked her to go to technical secondary school to learn a skill and go out to work early to earn money.At that time, she had been admitted to the best high school in the county. She knew that the strength of a person was very small, and she also knew that the school did not want to give up excellent students, so she mobilized teachers, the community and other external forces that could be mobilized. Mother.

Although he went to high school smoothly, Jiang Yu did not have a smooth life in those three years.The tuition fee was "loaned" to her by her mother, and she will have to pay it back in the future. She brings her own steamed buns with leftovers for meals, buys teaching materials with the money from selling bottles, and the school uniform that has been worn for three years will always be her mother's old clothes.

Her already shaky self-esteem was completely destroyed in these three years.

At that time, her biggest dream was to escape from this suffocating place, so she held her breath and stubbornness, waiting for graduation.

After finally getting through the third year of high school, the day before the college entrance examination, the house was calm, and her mother even told her to play well. On the morning of the exam, she was locked up and locked in the room...

That was the abyss of her life and the turning point of her life.

With a train ticket, Jiang Yu fled from a small town to a big city. He had no education or background, so he could only do odd jobs. He served dishes in a restaurant, and worked on an assembly line in a factory. Later, by chance, he signed up for a modeling contest for a prize of 3000 yuan. .

She is tall and thin, with a clear and three-dimensional face, which just meets the registration requirements. Anyway, I don't know what to do, so I might as well give it a try.

It was this attempt that changed her fate.

Before escaping from home, she secretly took the account book to change her name.

I hope that I will be safe and sound no matter how many storms I experience in the future, so I took the word "Yu", a very neutral word, and also intended to get rid of the pain brought to her by gender stereotypes since childhood.

She, Jiang Yu, only has a biological gender, not a social gender.She is a person first and a woman second.

If she was born to please others, she will live for herself.

She has been working abroad for more than ten years, from an unknown small wild model to an international supermodel, her career is a ray of light that shines into her empty and dark life, allowing her to reborn and find her true self.It's been a long time, so long that she thought she had walked out of the haze of the past.

But in fact, she just forgot temporarily.

The old name was a thorn in her heart, a proof that she was as humble as dirt, and a shame that could not be erased in her life.

Rabbits are herbivores, she is a rabbit, but she is not a vegetarian. Every time she sees the name "Jiang Wanyin", it reminds her deeply, go forward and don't look back.

……

The sky outside the window is getting darker, and the tall buildings are brightly lit.

Jiang Yu's whole body was stiff and cold, and the thin sheets of paper in her hands were creased. She stared at the word "Jiang Wan Yin", her shoulders couldn't stop shaking.

A little fog filled the corners of his eyes.

This is her humiliation, her embarrassment, and the embarrassment she tried her best to hide. Only the closest and most trusted people around her know the whole picture.And Cheng Suran, her canary, barged in so recklessly.

Her dignity, her barriers, were shattered in an instant, revealing her true and unbearable self.At that moment, she was suddenly at a loss and had nowhere to escape...

Jiang Yu fell down on the bed, his vision gradually blurred, the warm liquid hung in his eye sockets for a long time, and finally fell down.

- pat!

Tears fell on the words "Jiang Wanyin" impartially.

Born to please.

No one wants, no one loves.

So what if you are bright and beautiful, you are still barren inside, living on indulgence.You have no interest in understanding the world and people, so your arrogance is vulnerable.

You have only a lonely and arrogant glass heart.

Jiang Yu was talking to himself in his heart.

The sky was completely dark, and the light from outside came in dimly. The whole bedroom seemed to be submerged in the deep sea, dim and quiet, without a single sound.

An oppressive and suffocating feeling grabbed her throat.

Jiang Yu stood up tremblingly, wiped his face, and randomly folded a few pieces of paper and stuffed them into his bag. When he thought of Cheng Suran waiting outside to see his jokes, he didn't want to stay for even a second longer.

She put down the suitcase, rushed out sullenly, and entered the elevator as if fleeing.

And the living room was empty.

……

In the early winter night, the cool wind pierced the bone, and the cold air went straight into the collar of the shirt.

The driver went back, and was originally scheduled to pick him up tomorrow morning, but Jiang Yu just wanted to go home immediately, and couldn't wait to call someone to come, so he went out of the hotel gate and directly stopped a taxi and went up.

All the way in a muddle.

When I got home, Xiao Zhou and the nanny aunt were eating, and I was not surprised to see her come back suddenly. The aunt immediately went to help her get the ingredients—she usually made her own dinner at home, and she ate very little and casually.

"I've eaten, don't worry about me." Jiang Yu walked past the restaurant expressionlessly, and walked in like a gust of wind.

The master bedroom area has three sections. The outermost part is the main cloakroom, the middle part is the bathroom, and the deepest part is the bedroom with a large bed.There is a sliding door outside the cloakroom, which can be closed to lock the entire area and separate the independent living space.

This is the safe zone she designed for herself.

Jiang Yu stepped into the cloakroom, pressed the button on the wall, and the two doors closed automatically and slowly, and they were locked with a "click", as if her whole heart was enveloped in the safety barrier.

Go through the bathroom, enter the room, turn on the light, close the second door, lock it, and finally completely safe.

She hasn't lived for a long time, but the house is still clean without any dust. The bunny dolls all over the bed are neatly arranged, watching her quietly.

Jiang Yu breathed a sigh of relief, and fell limply on the big bed.

Like a walking dead without a soul.

The light above her head was a bit dazzling, she closed her eyes weakly, grabbed the rabbit closest to her and hugged her, curled her body up, and breathed lightly.

very quiet.

My ears hurt from the silence.

She heard her even and gentle breathing, felt her steady and powerful heartbeat, and her chaotic brain gradually became clear.But what followed was a burst of pain that was stronger than the next.

It turned out that nothing had changed.

The three words "Jiang Wanyin" can still easily defeat her.

For more than ten years, from being unable to let go of the camera, to being able to take the initiative to find a concave shape, from standing on the runway with trembling legs and almost falling, to being able to step on the [-] cm high and confidently appear on the stage, she has always thought that Transformed, reborn, renewed from the inside out.

But she is still her.

She is the one who can't get rid of the brand, and the one who can't get out.

Jiang Yu hugged the rabbit in his arms tightly.It's soft and comfortable, but it doesn't have human body temperature, so it can't replace that warmth...

Suddenly very cold.

She opened her eyes, let go of the rabbit, got up in a trance, opened the door, and rushed into the bathroom to turn on the hot water.

After soaking in a hot bath for a long time, the water in the bathtub is continuously discharged, and a steady stream of water flows in again, always maintaining a constant temperature.Her fingers turned white, her skin wrinkled, and she was drowsy from the soak, and her body finally felt warm.

Jiang Yu came out of the water, dried himself, and got into bed without wearing anything.

I came back in a hurry tonight, and I didn't bring the melatonin in the suitcase.She hugged the rabbit, curled up in the cold blanket, and warmed the big bed with her body.

I don't know how long I lay there, and the drowsiness gradually hit me...

The long dark corridor trapped her again.

This sleep was very restless, I woke up intermittently, my heartbeat was fast and slow, and my breathing was a little messy.I don't know how many times she woke up from the dream, the bright white light above her head made her squint her eyes, but it was dark outside.

Only the upper body was warm under the quilt, and it was freezing cold below the knees. Jiang Yu shrank back, got up, and rubbed his temples tiredly.

I grabbed my phone and looked at it, it was 04:30 in the morning.

There are unread WeChat messages on the screen.

Clicking in, it turned out to be a small account, and Cheng Suran sent her several messages.

Children: [-transfer 50000-]

Children: [Sister, I'm sorry, I shouldn't touch your things, I know I did something wrong, I don't quibble, but please believe me, I don't have any malice. ]

Then there are two voices.

"Sister... When I came back in the afternoon, I found the door of the master bedroom was closed. I thought you were inside, so I knocked on the door. No one answered, so I opened the door... I saw a stack of papers on the bed. I thought it was strange, so I went to have a look. ...When I saw your name written, I wanted to put it down immediately, and then you came back..."

"Don't worry... I only saw the photo and name... I really don't know anything else... I... I know I violated the regulations... I will return the money to you, and I will go away... woo woo woo... ..."

The girl choked up and cried, her nasal voice was thick, and she kept gasping as she spoke.

It seems that after crying for a long time, I can't control myself at all.

Sent time was one hour ago.

After listening, Jiang Yu fell into silence, the loud applause echoed in his ears, and the girl's choked sobs made him a little irritable for a while.

A faint trace of regret surfaced in my heart.

Like an ant gnawing.

Is she wrong?

No, how could the gold master do something wrong...

His head ached, his body was tired and sore, Jiang Yu closed his eyes, took a deep breath, threw the phone aside, and lay back on the half-warm bed.

When I woke up again, it was already dawn.

Waking up to the phone ringing.

"Sister Yu, where are you? I didn't see you when I arrived at the hotel, but the box is still here..." Tian Lin's anxious voice reached her ears as soon as the connection was made.

Jiang Yu half closed his eyelids, and said weakly, "I'm at home."

"Why did you go home suddenly?" Tian Lin was slightly relieved.

"Change your mood."

"Oh. By the way, Miss Cheng told me that you have terminated the contract. She moved back to school today and gave me the backup car key just now."

"What?" Jiang Yu opened his eyes suddenly, "When did I say to terminate the contract? What about her?"

Tian Lin paused, and said, "Wash your face in the room."

Jiang Yu woke up instantly, got up from the bed, and said in a deep voice, "You stop her, I'll go over right away."