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I haven't celebrated my 20th birthday yet, but I have experienced too many things in the past four years. After breaking up with Yan Minglang, I was severely depressed for a while.

In fact, Yan Minglang did not hit me the hardest.It’s just that after my parents passed away, before I had time to suffer from the great changes in my family, I was already deeply in debt. I only cared about money every day, and I didn’t have time to take care of my mood.

Ever since I broke up with Yan Minglang, I have often dreamed of my parents falling from a building, and my grandfather who was as dead as a bone.I couldn't eat anymore, the esophagus always seemed to be blocked by something, and I felt like vomiting after eating.Can't sleep at night, even if I fall asleep, I will wake up soon.

I know Davis is worried seeing me getting thinner, but I can't control my body.When eating together a few times, he saw me rushing to the bathroom to vomit, and almost wanted to drag me to do psychological counseling.

But I always feel that is not the case.

I was indeed depressed because of Yan Minglang, but the feeling now is not the same as the psychological shadow left by my parents when they passed away.

Gradually, I realized that there must be something wrong with my body.

Every day when I took a bath, I felt a deep fear when I saw my rapidly slimming limbs and slightly protruding belly, and I didn't even think of Yan Minglang for a long time.

The fear of the unknown disease made me have no time to think about it.

I dare not tell Davis.I think I'm probably going to die, he's already worried about me too much, I can't make him sad anymore.

I think there must be a mutation in one of my organs, and I may have reached the terminal stage of terminal illness. Occasionally, I will find something rolling in my stomach, and I even think of those post-apocalyptic disaster movies.

In infinite fear, I spent my 20th birthday.

On the first Spring Festival after coming to country Z, I only experienced insomnia during the whole night of carnival in the whole city.

April [-]st was a hopeless day for me, but it was also an important turning point that changed my life.

At one o'clock in the morning, I was awakened by a sharp pain, and I broke out in a cold sweat the moment I woke up.

The mutated thing in the stomach seemed to be wriggling, the lower body was wet and sticky, and there was a faint smell of rust in the air.I reluctantly turned on the bedside lamp and lifted the quilt, and was stunned by the scene in front of me.

The white sheets had been stained a bright red.

Staring at the pool of blood in a daze, the bone-piercing pain once again hit every nerve in me. I lay slumped on the bed until the sharp pain passed. I climbed to the side of the bed, trembling, picked up the The cell phone on the bedside table.

The cell phone was given to me by Davis. Although I hardly ever use it, I have even used it as a decoration, but it has become my only life-saving straw now.

I opened the address book, and there was only Davis' phone number in it.

The short "beep" sound seemed to me to have passed a century. The moment it was connected, I couldn't help but shed tears.

"Hello."

It's not Davis, it's Chen Jin's voice.

I bit my bottom lip and tried to say in my calmest voice, "Is Davis there?"

"Shaw?!" Chen Jin's pleasantly surprised voice came, "Where did you go, why did you..."

"Honestly," I interrupted him, "Where's Davis?"

"We were playing outside. He just went to the bathroom. Do you have anything to do with him?"

"Trouble you...uh..." A burst of pain hit me, and I gritted my teeth to resist the painful moan.

"Shaw! What's wrong with you! Where are you?"

Big cold sweat rolled down my forehead, it hurt so much, I almost had the illusion that I was going to be torn in half.

I breathed heavily like a fish thrown on the shore, and I couldn't say a word for a long time.

Just then, I heard Davis' voice, the pain was too much for me to make out what they said, and then Davis said, "Shaw, don't be afraid, I'm going to find you now."

He kept comforting me on the phone, but I couldn't hear what he said. I was overwhelmed by the gradually dense pain, but I couldn't pass out. All my nerves were feeling the desperate pain.

I don't know how long it took, a sharp pain came from my lower body, and I yelled "ah".

The bedroom door slammed open as something rushed out of his belly.

I lay on the bed like a pool of mud, with no strength in my body.With tears in my eyes, I could only vaguely see the terrified eyes of Davis and Chen Jin, and my mind was gradually withdrawn, and I seemed to recognize a strange cry, and then I finally passed out as I wished.

Half a year later, under the arrangement of Chen Jin and Davis, I left Country Z.

Sitting on the private plane flying to Melbourne, I took a look at the little baby sleeping next to me. In less than two years, it seemed like a lifetime away.

When the plane took off, I looked up at the sky outside the window.

I don't remember if the sky was so blue when the plane landed more than a year ago, but my future days should be like this sky.

There is a bright future, and the future is promising.

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[six years later]

The weather in Melbourne this year is very strange. It has rained sparsely for nearly a month, but it doesn't last long for a single rain.When I went out in the afternoon, the sun was still shining brightly, and it started to rain when I walked on the road. Fortunately, this kind of thing happened a lot. I had already prepared for it with an umbrella, raincoat and rain boots.

Mrs. Jones handed Vito into my hand, smiled and said to me, "We will miss you and Vito, Mr. Kent."

"We will miss you too, Mrs. Jones," I smiled and shook hands with her, then lowered my head and pulled Vito's little hand, "say goodbye to Mrs. Jones."

Vito's eye circles were a little red. He let go of my hand and threw himself into Mrs. Jones' arms.

"Good boy." Mrs. Jones sighed and hugged him tightly.

Standing at the door downstairs, I knelt down to help Vito put on his raincoat and rain boots, and squeezed his soft little face.

He put his arms around my neck and said, "Dad, where are we going tomorrow? Never come back? Never see Mrs. Jones again?"

I picked him up with one hand and walked into the drizzle holding an umbrella.For this child, I am very guilty, but there is nothing I can do.I can't give him a complete family, many things, I don't know how to explain to him, I don't want to deceive him, even if I can make up many reasons to prevaricate him.

Gradually, as he got older, he stopped asking me questions such as "Where is my mother?" and would pester Mrs. Jones to share secrets with her.I know that he is more dependent on Mrs. Jones than I am.

I said: "We are going to a far away place, don't worry, we will come back when Dad finishes his business."

"Is it far? How far? Are you leaving Victoria?"

"Not only are we going to leave Victoria, we're going to leave Australia and go to a country called Country Z."

"Country Z? I've never heard of it. Has Dad been there?"

I paused slightly and turned my head to look at his bright black eyes.

"Country Z," I said softly, "that's where you and Dad were born."

I saw the deep interest in his eyes, but I couldn't tell what it was like in my heart.I think he actually wanted to ask me a lot, but judging from previous experience, it was impossible for me to explain it to him, so he didn't ask anything.

The rain stopped soon, but after several days of rain, many small puddles accumulated.

I put Vito down and put away the umbrella. Vito stood in front of a puddle and looked at me expectantly: "Dad, can I play in the puddle for a while?"

I nodded: "Only this time."

He cheered, put his feet together and stepped into the puddle with a "slap", splashing a large amount of water.

I looked at his innocent smile, but felt a little uneasy in my heart.

But I think I should think too much.

Six years have passed, and I have even forgotten Yan Minglang's appearance, and it is even more impossible for him to remember buying a sex partner six years ago.Even if I remember, the me now has changed a lot compared to then.

In the year after Vito was born, I inexplicably grew a full thirteen centimeters. It seems that half of the Australian genes in my body began to recover. My eyes became completely dark blue, and the bridge of my nose was more straight than before. Rounded face shapes become more defined.

Compared with my overly delicate appearance when I was 19 years old, I am very satisfied with my current appearance. Even if I walk with Eric who is still taller than me, I am no longer as inferior as before.

Vito is a very worry-free and self-disciplined kid. Even his favorite puddle game, he only played for 5 minutes before obediently returning to me and holding my hand.

When we got home, we were not surprised to see Eric.

Carrying Vito on his shoulders happily jumping at him, Eric asked me: "Is everything packed?"

I pointed to the small suitcase next to the sofa.

He said in surprise: "Just bring such a little thing?"

I said: "Davis and Jin will help me prepare." These two people often come to Melbourne to see me and Vito in the past few years. Also, you have to be polite to them even for a meal.

What's more, they have seen my miserable appearance and know my most private secrets. Even Eric doesn't know about those things.They have become like family to me.

Although I know, until now, Jin still loves me.But we both understand that my feelings for him cannot become the one he wants after all.

Had one last meal with Eric and we hugged tightly as he left.

"I will always keep the house for you, come back soon." He said.This house is his property. Since I returned to Melbourne, he let me live here for six years.

I smiled and teased him: "I hope to see your girlfriend when I come back next time."

He shrugged: "I still want to play for a few more years. I don't want to be like you. I have to change the diaper of the child at the age of 20. The child is still someone else's cute." He pinched Vito's small face .

I laughed and shooed him out.

Vito looked at me thoughtfully, I don't know what was going on in his little head.He's smart, and sometimes I'm amazed at the maturity of his ideas.I know that not all children of this age are like him, he... must have inherited Yan Minglang's genes, at least when I was as young as him, I knew nothing but mischief.

In the evening, we took a shower early and went to bed. After a while, he suddenly said to me: "Dad, you...if you want, you can find me another mother. I'm fine."

I laughed dumbfounded, not knowing how to react, so I pretended to be asleep.

I heard him mutter in a low voice: "With a new mother, dad's eyes will smile, right?"

At that moment, my heart seemed to be pierced.

[The author has something to say: It's started, student Yan, prepare to die! 】