So handsome, how could he be a cannon fodder

When Pan Gu created the world, there was no such thing as hell.In the darkest depths of the underworld there is only a lone murky river flowing day and night.

No one knows where the end of the river is, and no one knows where the end of the river is.

In the prehistoric era, although it existed, it never had consciousness, just like an ordinary river, ignorant and ignorant.No living beings will approach it, because the river water is too muddy.

Later, 33 days appeared, and the fairy world appeared, and he gradually began to have sanity, thinking and flipping, but he couldn't transform into a human form like other naturally raised spirits.He watched the underworld being built day by day, Yan Luo Wang lived in, Judge Cui lived in, Ox Head Horse Face Black and White Impermanence also lived in, and there were even day wandering gods and night wandering gods...

In the beginning, Black and White Wuchang was the first to discover that it was a "living creature".Immediately afterwards, the gods realized that it could not transform into a human being, and felt sympathy for it after being surprised, fearing that it would be too lonely to stay by a river, so they decided to squat beside it to play mahjong from now on.

He could bear it for the first few hundred years.

However, as the number of creatures on the ground increases day by day, the number of ghosts in the underworld also increases day by day. The mahjong table has changed from two tables for eight people at the beginning to a long dragon stretching hundreds of meters along the river bank...

How far have you guys rolled!

King Yan Luo had no choice but to build another square in front of the main hall of the underworld, and all the mahjong tables were moved there to Mortal Real Immortal Road.

It breathed a sigh of relief, and the Huangquan River became quiet again.

However, the leisurely life still didn't last long, and after thousands of years passed, the Huangquan River... was short of water.

The Huangquan River is short of water.

Sounds weird, right?But think about it, although this river is endlessly long, and the water flow seems to be infinitely large, but at that time there were still ten suns hanging in the sky. Let it evaporate a lot of water.In fact, it is quite good. Some small rivers are dried up without any drops of water left, leaving only a dry and cracked riverbed there.

To be honest, the hell is actually so hot right now that King Yan Luo and the others are almost too lazy to play mahjong, and they scratch their heads and scratch their heads all day thinking about the solution.

Fortunately, it didn't take long for them to figure it out.

It's hot and there's no water, what else can I do?Then it will rain!

Yan Luowang and others invited Thunder God and Lightning Mother, Feng Bo Yushi, and asked them to come here to make thunder and rain.The rumbling thunder sounded in the dark sky, and soon the heavy rain fell, and the water was rising. Huang Quan said that he was a little happy.

The days of the ten suns are still going on, and the days when the gods such as Lei Gong and Dian Mu wait for the rain from time to time are still going on.

There is an experiment in the modern world. Raise a dog and give it food after ringing the bell every day. Over time, as long as the bell is ringing enough, it will know that there is food to eat and will secrete saliva... This is called conditioned reflex .

Yes, Huang Quanhe also suffered from this terminal illness called "conditioned reflex"...

Thunder = it's going to rain = rising water = a little fun.

Therefore, thunder = happy ⊙v⊙.

******

Recently, Lei Gong felt that something was wrong.

He was transformed by the first thunder and lightning when the world was created, and he spent tens of millions of years cultivating human form. He and his elder sister Dianmu were responsible for thundering all over the world to herald the coming of heavy rain.But they are not under the control of the gods in the heaven, and they don't even live in the fairyland. Instead, they dug a big hole on the cliff of a big mountain, with a stone bed, a stone bowl, a stone table and a stone stool. , will not be tired or hungry, as long as there is a place to live, it doesn't matter how the conditions are.

He is now squatting on the stone table in a daze.

"Why are you squatting on the table again? Don't be afraid of prolapse if you squat too much!" Dianmu poked him down with a fork, and said, "I told you, if you dare to come up again... What's wrong? ?”

Lei Gong didn't listen to what she was saying at all, let alone refuted, and didn't even stand up, just continued to squat on the ground in this forked position.

"It's okay, you." Mother Dian cared about her younger brother.

"No..." Lei Gong replied, "I just feel that something is wrong with the river in the underworld."

"That river?" Dianmu's brain is not very good, she thought for a long time before saying, "The Huangquan River?"

"Well, that's it." Lei Gong said, "I don't know how to describe it, but I feel that every time it sees me... it seems very happy."

Electric mother: "..."

"Is your brain okay?" She said blankly, "Can a river have a cross-species relationship with you? It doesn't look like another river. I don't think your face has grown to that level yet."

Lei Gong ignored her again.

In fact, he also felt that it was impossible for him to think this way, but he couldn't help thinking about it.Dianmu's words just now seemed to touch something magical, a strange feeling suddenly rose in his heart, he couldn't explain it, but it was still growing, and it snowballed, making him more and more restless.

He decided to go for a walk.

When I came back to my senses, the surroundings were pitch black, the sky was gloomy and there was no light at all, and not far away, a long dim river was flowing quietly.

He actually walked to the underworld without knowing it.

"Huh la la..." Huang Quan splashed water, and was a little happy to see this person again.

Lei Gong walked over slowly, squatting by the river to watch it.

"Huh la la..." The spray of the Huangquan River slapped him in the face.

"Are you alive?" Lei Gong asked it.

Huang Quan raised a bigger splash and said "ok".

The river really is alive!

Lei Gong felt incomparably surprised, he had been to the underworld many times, and he was considered a frequent visitor here, but he never talked about the largest river in the underworld with King Yama and the others.He thought about how many years this river has been flowing down here, and it must have been a long time to have sanity, but it still can't transform into a human form.Yama and the others must have looked down on it, so they left it here and ignored it.

Lei Gong's strength is very strong, there are not many people in the entire fairy world who can beat him, so those who can beat him are some crazy cultivators who don't bother to pay attention to him, and those who can't beat him won't come to him at all, which makes him so far He is still a naive and innocent fool who takes things for granted.

Of course, Huang Quanhe wasn't going to correct his thinking, on the contrary, it thought it was pretty good. For example, Lei Gong didn't like to pay attention to the gang of idiots who could only play mahjong in the underworld, but always squatted beside it and babbled.

Probably because he has been used to the excitement for so many years, even though it has not been a long time now, he still doesn't hate this person for disturbing him.

"Why can't you transform into a human form?" Lei Gongxian's Dantong was playing with stirring water, halfway through the stirring, he suddenly found something wrong and took it back, saying, "It's not right, it's dirty."

The water in the Huangquan River doesn't seem to be clean.

Huang Quan: "..."

It rewarded the person in front of him with a beautiful wave several meters high.

"By the way, do you know illusions?" Lei Gong's eyes lit up and said, "You can't transform into a shape, but you can use illusions to appear, then it looks like you are so good at taking pictures of waves!"

The most important thing is that such a tsundere must be a beautiful girl with big breasts!

Huang Quan was also very moved. He had been thinking about turning into a human for thousands of years, but he still couldn't find a way to get started.Ask Lei Gong, Lei Gong is also ignorant, he only said that he broke through when he fell asleep, stretched his waist... drink, when did he come out with five more legs!

Huang Quan really couldn't find a reference, so he had no choice but to create an illusion to satisfy his hunger.

Out of a certain mentality known to all men, Lei Gong expressed 12 points of support for it, and searched for all information related to transfiguration for it, trying to make the girl as beautiful as possible.Even Dian's mother wanted to help him, but she was sternly rejected. The reason was that the elder sister was ugly, and she was afraid that the younger sister would be brainwashed after seeing it.

That would be too sad, right?

Mother Dian said coldly: "I don't know if that will be very sad, I only know that you are going to be fucking miserable soon!"

Lei Gong was taken back to the underworld, with fork marks all over his back.

The Huangquan River welcomes him with splashes of water. It has seen and touched his hard work these days.It still doesn't know what kind of illusion it will turn into. It would be a lie if it said it wasn't nervous. It didn't want to disappoint Lei Gong.

"Clatter..." It summoned Lei Gong to come over.

"What's the matter?" Lei Gong squatted on the bank of it and smiled like a fool.

"Wow..." It suddenly didn't want to say it anymore.

Let's just wait...wait, wait until after he takes shape.At that time, I proposed marriage to him and went to marry him.

It is said that only when two humanoids are married can they be together in a fair manner.

Although I don't know why Yan Luo Wang Judge Cui and the others play together all day even though they are not married, but it thinks it is better to have an official certificate.

Everything was ready, and soon, the day for the human form that Lei Gong specially chose for it arrived.

The entire Huangquan River began to churn gradually, splashes of water collided, and mist floated on the surface of the river.The fog was thicker and thicker, gathered together by a whirlwind, and it was not at all translucent like before.

Oops, it looks like the girl will be a yellow-skinned girl qaq.

As a Lei Gong who advocates classical beauty, he has to admit that he still hopes that the other party can be fair and beautiful... If I knew it, I would have changed the water of Huangquan River first!

Huang Quan didn't know what he was thinking, the mist slowly gathered and condensed, first it was the simplest five fingers at the end of the limbs, and then gradually spread upwards, slender and strong arms and long legs appeared in the air, and then the tall and straight trunk and head, ink-colored The long hair was loose and fluttered in the wind.

Finally, a dark yellow brilliance flashed, a simple robe covered his body, he looked no different from those gods running around outside.

It really doesn't make a difference.

He was just imagining a shape, but judging from the current situation...he seems to have successfully transformed into a human...

Lei Gong stood there in a daze, looking up at him with his mouth open, with an expression on his face as if he had been struck by lightning.

This girl... No, no, no, she's not a girl at all... He's a man! ! ! ! !

That is why ah!

God blame me!

Huang Quan raised his hand and looked at his body curiously. Even though he had seen so many people coming and going over the years, none of them were him.

"Hey..." He was about to express his joy to Lei Gong, when he saw the other party squatting on the ground, exuding an aura of lovelessness all over his body.

He had no choice but to change his mouth and ask, "What's wrong with you?"

As he spoke, he looked up and down about his appearance, and even condensed out of the water mirror to look at it again and again, as if he was no different from other humanoid creatures...

"No, no, don't talk to me now." Lei Gong said sadly, "Leave me alone for a while, just for a while."

After speaking, he wiped his face twice, and left in tears.

Huang Quan: "..."

Does he not like the way he is now?

The original joy and excitement all disappeared at once, the human figure disappeared, it...or he turned into a muddy river again, rushing forward.

Lei Gong rushed back to his yard and cried loudly.

"What's the matter, you!" Dianmu's forehead was throbbing with veins.

"Man..." Lei Gong said darkly, "My wife has become a man, and the man is a father again!"

"I thought it was something wrong, I made a fuss." Mother Dian sneered when she understood what he said, "What's the matter with the man, as long as he looks good."

Is it good to look good?Lei Gong really thought about it, he was indeed very good-looking, he had never seen such a good-looking person.

The mother of lightning said again: "If it really turns into a beautiful girl, do you still expect that a thunderbolt and a river will give birth to a child?"

Lei Gong was stunned.

It seems to be the truth.

But is there still something wrong.

Forget it.

"You are my own sister!" Lei Gong rushed back again.

Ahhh, my daughter-in-law who ran away halfway must be heartbroken!

Electric mother: "..."

Are you sick? I was your own sister!

Huang Quanhe saw Lei Gong who had gone and returned. At this time, he had completely disappeared from the appearance that he could not accept just now, but he was very energetic.

"Huangquan Huangquan!" Lei Gong appeared on the stage with a loud noise in the sky, "I've figured it out, you marry me!"

Huang Quan suspected that he heard it wrong: "What?"

"My sister said." Lei Gong squatted beside him and said, "Anyway, even if we have a baby, we don't know what it will be, so we just don't want it. It doesn't matter if you are a boy!"

"Oh." Huang Quan hesitated for a while, but finally asked, "What is a boy?"

Hey?

Yi Lei and Yi He stared wide-eyed.

Just like in the eyes of human beings, all sparrows look exactly the same, in the eyes of a river, there is no difference between human males and females, that is, whether there are two lumps of flesh on the chest... What, face?But don't you all have the same face?

He felt that the two lumps of flesh of the "female" looked cumbersome, and the Lei Gong he was most familiar with didn't have such a thing, so he subconsciously became the existence of the same gender as the closest person.

Lei Gong and Huang Quanhe somehow became a couple.However, this incident did not cause much fluctuation in the fairy world, because the relationship between the two of them seemed too normal, and they did not deliberately tell others, resulting in the fact that not many people knew about the two being together for hundreds of years.

The only ones who knew about this matter were Dianmu and a group of people in the underworld. Dianmu had a violent personality and no one dared to approach her, while everyone in the underworld was a bunch of nerds, and they had no chance to interact with other gods.

The days in the underworld were very peaceful.In this world that is not governed by the fairy world, Yan Luo Wang is the one and only boss, and they don't need to give anyone's face when they nest here.It's just that Lei Gong was born to be restless. Although Huang Quanhe didn't like to move, he still dragged him to travel for decades. When he came back, he brought a wolf cub with him. It is said that he picked it up in the mountains and his parents died. In the hands of the monster, he simply hugged it back to the underworld to raise it.

This wolf cub was originally a descendant of a great demon, and he grew up beside two natural gods and gods all year round. His cultivation base is even better than blue.The original gray-white fur has turned into a mighty and domineering blue-black because of the death energy of the underworld and the excessive power of thunder and lightning on Lei Gong's body.

Such a day seems to be very beautiful, Lei Gong is free to move stones, and is going to build a bridge over the river, and repair it when he has time.

Until he decided to respond to the Jade Emperor's call to go out, he happened to fix three things.