The man rescued from Kabukicho

Jiro glared at Yijuin, breathing heavily due to unstable emotions.

This man, are you kidding me.

How can you say the word "death" with such a careless attitude.

It's so uncomfortable.

Angry with grief, and sadder with anger.

But his hand covering Ijuin's mouth was taken off and fell into Ijuin's gentle palm.

Yijiyuan squeezed his hand and said in that indifferent voice: "It's so fierce."

Obviously said it so solemnly, but "so fierce" or something, it's like being coquettish.

Many complicated emotions in Cilang's heart melted away in an instant.

It feels like the cat is wrapping around the owner's calf, so no matter how angry you were at the cat for destroying the scene before, you can't get angry at the moment, even if you know the cat is trying to be good.

It seems that in front of Yijiyuan, he is often so helpless.

Maybe it's better not to treat Yijuin as a cat, this person will get worse.Cirou had this premonition.

But no matter what Cirou was thinking, Yijuin finally confessed at this moment.

Yijiyuan said indifferently: "It's human nature to avoid talking about it and be afraid of death. But maybe it's because you avoid talking about it and don't think about it in normal times, which makes it even more mysterious and terrifying."

"Since I knew there was no cure for my insomnia, 'death' has become a problem that I have always considered. It would be a lie to say that I have never been afraid, but I really don't think 'death' is so much to fear, Even as a teenager, it was the same.”

Ci Lang worriedly asked: "Why?"

Yijuin analyzed him calmly: "People cannot compete with death, everyone will die. That is to say, a person's life, from birth, is on the way to death. The so-called 'life' is a person's death. past history."

"Instead of being afraid of such boring questions as 'how' and 'when' it's useless to think about, it's better to use time effectively and accomplish what you want to do before the inevitable death comes. Writing suicide notes regularly, in fact, In essence, it is not much different from the annual summary..."

"Not much difference?" Hearing this, Cilang had to interrupt Yijiin.

Yes, what Ijuin said is not unreasonable, on the contrary, these words can be called philosophical thinking, let Cirou realize another view of death, and if you think about it carefully, it may be a more optimistic view Maybe.

But what makes Jirou uneasy is not Yijuin's thinking of living towards death, but the absence of any emotional elements in Yijuin's words.

What Ijuin said all emphasizes "time" and "what you want to accomplish".

But the reason why death is scary is because it means the most complete farewell to the world, and it is impossible to meet with relatives, friends, and lovers again.And the things that can no longer be done must not only be work and career, but also places you want to visit, food you want to try, a boring obsession that only has special meaning for you...

So, how come the suicide note is not much different from the annual summary?In other words, if there is not much difference between a person's suicide note and an annual summary, what kind of life is this person leading?

Cilang knows that such a man standing at the top of the social pyramid has no turn to worry about a criminal like himself. In the eyes of the society, his life is not even qualified to compare with that of Yijuin.And what he was worried about might be something that Yijuin didn't care about at all.

But Yijiin is the one he loves, even if it may be unnecessary worry, it is impossible to sit idly by.

Cirou didn't know how to explain the deep uneasiness in his heart at this moment, and he didn't know whether he should use his own common sense to deny the concept that Yijuin had pondered over and over since he was a teenager.

He thought for a while, and chose to talk about his own affairs: "When I was alone and bumped into walls after I was released from prison, I once thought, let's stop here, maybe life can no longer continue. I was just struggling in the quagmire. The ideal life and family I once wanted and were once close at hand no longer had the opportunity to have, and were not expected by anyone. Even if I died, no one would be sad for me. At that time, I thought too give up."

Hearing Jirou say this, Ijuin's pupils opened slightly, and since the topic of death was mentioned, he finally had a not-so-easy expression.

Jiro, who was held in Yijuin's arms, was relieved and even a little happy when he saw Ijuin's expression.

Cilang couldn't help holding Yijiyuan's face, lowered his head, pressed against Yijiyuan's forehead, and said with a low smile: "So you are also afraid. I was sitting there just now, watching you write the suicide note, and thinking about the possibility of losing You, once again become a human being living in this world, already feel uncomfortable to die. You see, 'die of happiness' and 'death of discomfort', in the eyes of ordinary people, 'death' is related to feelings This is something that cannot be overcome with reason. Even if I thought of giving up at that time, it was because I was unwilling to die like this. I was full of anger and sadness, but I still missed this life, so I persisted. Then you saved.

"Now I, because of you, although if there is an unavoidable accident, I will feel grateful and regret to pass away without complaint, but subjectively speaking, I don't want to die at all. Maybe it is reasonable to accept this ending. I want more time. I want to get back to normal and be with you. I want to work hard to make money, pay you back, buy you gifts, and take you on dates... I want to work hard to find Go back to your own life and want to be a reliable lover.

"To put it bluntly, I want to see some day in the future, when you are thinking about the issue of 'death', you will show the expression of a little fear just now. If you can't do it in one year, it will be two years, if you can't do it in two years, it will be ten years, 20 years, 30 years , if it wasn't for the fear of losing me, but for something else, someone else... I'd be happy."

Ijuin hugged him tightly and didn't speak for a while.

He wrapped his hands around Ijuin's neck, as if holding Ijuin's head in his arms.

When he finally spoke, Yijiyuan deliberately said maliciously: "Other people can?"

Cilang, who was anxiously waiting for a reply, couldn't control his glaring at Yijiyuan: "You're bad, uh..."

When the kiss was over, Jirou was still staring at Yijuin.

Yijiyuan didn't seem to take it seriously, stared at Cilang for a moment, and said calmly: "I'm a little afraid of you."

Afraid of him?Cilang's heart turned cold, and he asked stiffly, "...why?"

Ijuin rubbed the back of his neck soothingly with his hand: "Because, I found out that I like you more than I thought."

Hearing these words, Cirou felt the temperature of his face rise sharply, his heart was as soft as a rice cake, and his spine seemed to be unable to support it. He couldn't help but put all his weight on Ijuin's shoulders.

"Then, I will try my best to make you like me more," Jirou looked at the ends of Ijuin's hair, and said in a low voice in order not to reveal too much the joy in his heart, "but I still don't understand why you know that I have always liked you, I don't know?"

Hearing this, Yijiyuan revealed indifferently and indifferently: "Your eyes can't hide anything, even Fengzao can see it."

what?

Ci Lang was a little flustered: "Mother Feng Zao already knows?"

He was still thinking about how to talk to Granny Fengzao, and was still worried if Granny Fengzao would mind that they were all male... How unconscious he was, how could Granny Fengzao see it?

But why don't you know it yourself?

Yijiyuan didn't answer kindly, but instead said: "When I met you, I found that you didn't mention family affairs at all. Generally speaking, most of the topics of junior high school students with insufficient social experience revolve around school and family, even if they pay attention to privacy , There will always be one or two gossips such as "Mom burned the text last night", "I got up late and was scolded by my father". You have been nagging me, and you will tell me when you see cats and dogs fighting on the road, and you don't talk about it at all. Parents, I guess there's something wrong with it."

Cilang was stunned when he heard it, and he didn't realize that it was true until Yijiyuan said so.

Because the family atmosphere is very cold and his parents don't care much about him, he subconsciously doesn't want to think about it, and he won't mention it at school.

Yijuin continued: "One day you suddenly said happily that your father asked you how you are studying recently. This should be a very common conversation in an ordinary family, but you are very happy. So I think, you may be the kind , People who deliberately forget and don’t want to remember after being emotionally hurt. This was just my guess at the time. To prove it, it’s probably because you mentioned ‘Shi Yan’ yesterday.”

This analysis reminded Cilang that he tried desperately to forget Yijiyuan... But at the end, Cilang was a little confused: "What's wrong with 'Shi Yan Go'?"

Without directly saying it, Yijiyuan just reminded: "Poems are written in Chinese characters."

What about Chinese characters?

Cilang recalled that line of poem: Shijiu is lovely, beauty is pitiful.Eat cigarettes from time to time, and pass the sky with one breath.

beautiful pity.

Cirou was taken aback.

He didn't notice at all that the poem included the name of his ex-girlfriend, but only Shi Yanqu.

This level seems a little unreasonable.

Cilang said confusedly: "I also know that I will try my best to forget the bad things. After I broke up with you, I tried my best to forget you, but when I was in high school, I still thought of you from time to time. In the previous program, college classmates It also said that I wanted to make up with you after I was drunk. Why can't I think of her at all when I read the words..."

"Did you really like her?" Yijuin saw Cilang's gaze and explained, "I don't doubt your character. According to your personality, you must have not bothered to get along with her. But from your reaction Judging from her repulsive state, I think she used tricks in getting along. Have you ever thought about what you liked about her at first? Appearance, character or conduct?"

Even though it was listed like this, Ijuin really didn't think there was any merit in that woman.

What do you like about Mirei Kasuga?

Agreeing to date seems to be because of loneliness, liking seems to be a natural development after getting along, and it is already an abnormal emotional relationship after being belittled repeatedly. Even if I was not sober at the time, I have understood it now.

When it comes to what he likes her, Cilang is even more confused, trying to recall: "I don't know. Maybe it was that time, I thought it was the first time we got along, her performance. She acted so that I couldn't refuse, I feel It's like facing..."

face you.

Ci Lang's face turned pale, and he closed his mouth tightly.

Contacted the former college classmate and said that during the trip to Kyoto, Mirei Kasuga interrogated him who was drunk... What did he say to Mirei Kasuga?

Yijuin guessed what Jiro had left to say.

This is a big joke. If Mirei Kasuga came prepared and could imitate his words and deeds, it means that she has studied him, or at least paid attention to him.If Mochizuki's suffering is related to him, thinking of this possibility, Ijuin lowered his eyes.

So the current treatment is far from enough.

For dinner, the chef came to the hot spring private courtyard to cook Western food on the spot. After the meal, when they left, they went to enjoy the festive Karuizawa. The beautiful Christmas lights made Jiro feel better.

When I returned to the private courtyard, the maid had replaced all the supplies, especially the bedding.

But when he fell asleep after soaking in the hot spring, Yijiin hugged Cilang, but he couldn't fall asleep for a long time.

"What's the matter?" Sensing the displeasure in Yijuin, Cirou asked worriedly.

Yijiyuan said indifferently: "You get up first."

Jirou who was let go by Ijuin sat up and left the bed.

Then Ijuin got up too.

Ijuin stood by the bed, looking at the bed.

This scene was too weird, Ci Lang broke the silence: "...What's wrong? The bed is uncomfortable?"

"Well," Yijiyuan lifted the sheet, "There is something."

have something? !

For a moment, Cirou thought of ghost stories, as well as horror scenes such as business war assassinations.

But under the sheets was a white soft mattress without any foreign matter.

Yijiyuan lifted the soft mattress, and underneath it was another layer of pure white soft mattress.

Ci Lang raised his forehead, no matter how many times he still wanted to sigh, this cat is really difficult to raise, no, this bed is really soft.

Yijiyuan lifted the soft mattress, and finally found something on the mattress that disturbed him.

One was probably a paper clip that the maid used to fasten the neckline.

And it's a well-coiled paperclip, not an unrolled one.

In theory, it would be impossible to detect it through three layers of soft mattresses!

Ijuin stared at the paper clip coldly.

Cilang greeted Yijiyuan sincerely: "Princess Pea, don't look, let's make the bed together."

The author has something to say: *The cat in Yijiyuan is a black cat with golden pupils!It's the abyss lord!Jiro: It's the Princess and the Pea