woman wearing irish linen shirt

Miss Pender's eyes were wet, and she was totally defenseless.She had never looked at me like this before, and for a moment my heart trembled.

I looked at her and nodded silently.

"When?" She lowered her eyes and flicked her index finger on the screen boredly.

"Yesterday." I immediately explained, "But I'm not sure, I didn't deliberately hide it from you, you know we only met once..."

"Twice." She interrupted me, "but I didn't call you, after all you released my pigeons."

I couldn't refute, and looked at her with some guilt, but Miss Pender didn't look up at all.I whispered, "I'm sorry..."

"I should have asked for your phone." Miss Pender closed the tablet, but she still refused to give me even a little look.She looked at a corner of the small coffee table: "I waited for two days, and then tried to find out about you from my friends at the University of Massachusetts. I also wondered if you were from Amherst or Mount Holyoke, but everyone They say there is no one like that.”

"I……"

"I know. You're an hour's drive away, just outside of what I can think of." She didn't give me a chance to argue, "And then about a week later? I remember it well, it was Independence Day. My friend Tell me that there is indeed a long-haired East Asian girl in a black vest who showed up in Pioneer Valley for two consecutive days last week, and then asked for calls from more than a hundred people."

I just felt a surge of blood rushing to my head, and I couldn't squeeze out half a word, and even the roots of my ears were numb.

Miss Pender finally looked at me: "Were you recording some kind of challenge video?"

"I have a friend who's—it's true, I didn't make up a friend—" I fumbled to explain, opening my mouth but not knowing how to put it, almost incoherent, "Well, she's from Mount Holyoke. , very passionate about gender studies. We didn’t go back to China during the summer vacation, so she took me to be a volunteer, collecting data for her project...”

"What project?"

"The title of the thesis is "Analysis of the Success Rate of Women of Different Races in the Field of Same-Sex Hook-Up: The Multiple Oppressions of Lesbians"." I was the only one who slipped this sentence, because Qu Zhizhi and I came up with the title together, and she Also listed me as the second author, "For some reasons you can imagine, this paper has not been published anywhere, but I should still be able to find the paper itself, and if the corresponding author agrees, I can show it to you."

"So for academic purposes?"

"I'm not using it as an excuse..." I curled my hands together and looked at Miss Pender pitifully.If possible, I really want to hold her hand, but this matter is my fault, and if I want to really explain it, I can't play tricks.

Miss Pande leaned over and tucked my hair behind my ears: "I'll give you a chance to explain. Considering that you've met so many people, but you can still think of me, you earned this chance yourself."

I must have blushed.I didn't dare to breathe when she came close to me, now I cleared my throat and said, "I really want your phone number."

She froze for a moment, her expression unnatural for a moment.Miss Pender seemed a little shy.

I was more shy, but wanted to make it clear: "You asked me, 'Seriously?' and I said 'yes', right? I was serious. But your boyfriend was staring at you the whole time. Staring at me like a wolf, I thought he was your boyfriend. Uh, maybe not a good excuse, but I was in a bad mood at the time. Not sure if I should start a date..."

Memories flooded me like a sluice flood.The heat at the end of June in Massachusetts is similar to Singapore today, but there is a connection between fantasy and reality: I was at the end of the bridge and at the end of the road 11 years ago, and there were people waiting.

Miss Pender stared at me, taking me back in time.

After recovering from the illness, I didn't want to move at all, and Zhizhi couldn't help begging me again and again, so I reluctantly drove to the University of Massachusetts with her.There were also three mice in the same car, all of whom were Zhizhi's classmates in Mount Holyoke. They were persuaded by the high price of five hundred dollars a day to get on her thief boat.

Among them, only the African-American girl was openly gay.I was very closeted, but Dr. Qu obviously felt that I was in line with the mainstream aesthetics of lesbians at that time—or maybe that was the reason why she lured me on board, and she would do anything for scientific research results.

It was already four o'clock in the afternoon, wasn't it?I seem to have just finished my second bottle of mineral water of the day, and Miss Pender showed up by a dozen or so.

Of course I don't know her name, but there is a crimson figure standing out in the crowd. She and her male companion walked very fast, neither of them wore makeup, and their clothes clearly belonged to the stage.Is there any show tonight?I followed and looked over, and before I knew it, I was in front of her.

I want to know her.That was all I had in mind at the time.

But when I was about to speak, I realized how abrupt I was.They were obviously in a hurry, and the boy was still staring at me with very unfriendly eyes. How could I bother a lady in a hurry at this time?However, I even glanced at the male companion with a half-smile, looked at her and said, "Hi. Can I have your phone number?"

She stopped in her tracks, not seeming at all offended.Her eyes are so charming, I thought, and saw her soft lips part slightly: "Seriously?"

"Of course." I handed the phone over, "I want to meet you. I like your eyes, by the way."

Her male partner was going to kill with his eyes.

"Thank you." She handed me the phone.

"I'll call you later." I moved out of the way, "I'm sure we'll meet again."

And it really happened.

The back of Miss Pender's hand brushed my cheek lightly.Even her warm skin feels gentle to me, so what kind of warmth is in her eyes?She said softly, as if to comfort me: "I thought at that time, if I have the chance to see you again, I will take the initiative. Then you did appear again, on the flight from Boston to Frankfurt. Guess what?" Quite right, we did take the same flight."

I whispered, "Did you talk to me?"

"No." She shook her head, "You slept all the way. We sat behind you, and even my partner recognized you, but you just didn't even glance to the side."

I bit my lip: "I'm sorry..."

I temporarily changed to Hamburg for an exchange. I was very reluctant when I left, but I have to think about it in the long run.

I made up my mind to change my major to engineering. It is easier to get a full scholarship during my doctoral period, and it is easy to find a job and will not bring too much burden to my family.

"You don't need to apologize." She touched my face again, "It's just a conversation. I was too serious."

I muttered, "Are you also going to Germany as an exchange student?"

"No. Peter and I were invited to the headquarters of WDSF for an exchange meeting. We were the youth representatives of the bull dance. We also got the invitation for the following year. My life focused more on dancing, so I didn't Then think about developing a romantic relationship."

The one she mentioned was probably some kind of dance association, I hadn't heard of it.But since the transoceanic flight also invites people to participate in the exchange meeting, it must be a rich organization, and the abbreviation at the beginning is W, I am a little surprised: "Are you a world-class dancer?"

She laughed: "No no. My mom used to be famous. I'm just in her light."

"Oh." I was speechless.There are almost no famous Latin dancers in Asia, and my knowledge of dance is really limited—I finally thought of an angle and quickly said: "Considering the age, your mother must be a very pioneering Indian woman .”

She froze for a moment, laughed harder, her shoulders were shaking.

I was so embarrassed that I stammered, "Am I being too offended?"

"It's not because of that. Few Indian women born in the 60s are willing to learn Latin dance. Your stereotype is not wrong. I'm sorry." She finally stopped laughing, "My mother is Polish."

My face must have turned red.

India has a vast territory and a wide variety of races. Miss Pande is indeed not a high-browed Aryan, but because of her surname and skin color, it is also out of political correctness, and I have not guessed about other possibilities.I apologized in a low voice, I really wanted to bury myself in the ground, my whole face was burning.

Miss Pande caressed my face, rubbing her fingertips lightly, bringing a trace of coolness: "Your cheeks have turned rosy."

"Really?" I struggled to make a little noise, "I'm embarrassed and shy."

Her eyes lightly passed over my eyes, slowly slid down, followed the bridge of the nose to see a deeper place, and finally stopped at a certain place.Her voice was also softer than before: "Why are you shy?"

She is looking at my lips.

My mind went blank: "I don't know."

"Did my face turn red?" Seeing me shaking my head, the corners of her mouth slightly curled up. "Actually, I'm also a little nervous. Yao..."

"Ok?"

"You made me realize that I like girls." Miss Pender looked at me like a burning flame in the dark, "But apart from you, for a long time, no one of the same sex has asked me to call number. I wonder if I'm unpopular among girls—"

"You're super popular!" I blurted out. "You've got chasers all the way from here to France!"

She tried to suppress her smile, but failed, she was stunned for a moment and then laughed again: "Is that a common saying?"

"Uh, she's a very beautiful actress..." I just felt my tongue was fighting, I didn't know how to explain it clearly in a few words, and my heart was broken, "It means you are very beautiful!"

The air suddenly thinned.

"That's fine."

Miss Pender's eyelashes drooped.My face is so hot, can she feel it?Her cheeks were covered with a hazy and unfamiliar heat, and her long eyelashes almost touched mine.Our noses were touching, and she rubbed against me lightly, like a silent whisper, but also a fatal temptation.

Miss Pender's lips almost covered her lips.