imaginary rival

Everyone seemed to agree that Jiang Shiyu didn't want to live with Jiang Xing, and he didn't mention Jiang Xing much, and Jiang Xing didn't take time to see Jiang Shiyu, anyway, Jiang Shiyu didn't want to see him, so he was happy to be quiet and directly Moved to my aunt's house.

In two days, when grandma is discharged from the hospital, he will stay with grandma for two days before leaving.

He hasn't finished his homework, and school is about to start, and the third year of high school is heavy, so he has many excuses to use.

Jiang Shiyu put his luggage in the guest room and opened the windows for ventilation.

My aunt’s family has a cousin who is one year younger than him, named Song Guansheng, who has a more lively personality than Yan An, but he can play clever tricks in many places, a little bit in person. Jiang Shiyu doesn’t like this very much. feeling.

Also lively and clever, Xie Lanlan is much more likable, Yan An... Yan An doesn't seem to have any cleverness, he seems to be a little silly all the time.

Jiang Shiyu looked at Song Guan and thought.

No matter how you look at it, Yan An is more likable. There is no way, no one would dislike someone who catches Zhou and cotton.

It may be that the distance is getting farther, Jiang Shiyu has more breathing opportunities and free time to think about how he felt when he saw Yan An for the first time.

It wasn't the first time either, their meeting at the station should be counted as a reunion.

After the reunion, the first impression of Yan An was that he was dumb and stupid, not only these two points, but Jiang Shiyu always felt that Yan An was a little too dazed.

But in the later get-togethers, that kind of stupid feeling subsided little by little, and it was like laying a blanket on the bottom of my heart when getting along, soft.

Yan An is like a little golden retriever, once he gets to know him well, he treats people wholeheartedly.

The puppy’s fur is soft and fluffy, and it feels like velvet. Scratching makes the palms and the top of the heart itchy. He still looks at you so innocently, his eyes are wet, and his lips are wet... Jiang Shiyu remembered the day when he was drunk At night, in the taxi, Yan An insisted on leaning towards him.

Yan An's expression in Jiang Shiyu's mind became very clear, and the light that sometimes came in from the car window just fell into his eyes. Yan An was drunk, and his eyes should be cloudy, but Yan An's eyes were dark that night. Abnormally clear.

……and then?

He didn't dare to look, didn't dare to approach, shouldn't approach.

Jiang Shiyu sat at the table with a long sigh, took out the textbooks and arranged them as if offering sacrifices, and began to write.

There was nothing serious about grandma's health. Jiang Shiyu went to the hospital to accompany her until she was discharged. On the day of discharge, he saw Jiang Xing who came to pick them up.

"Hey, it's a shame," grandma patted Jiang Shiyu's hand vigorously, and said with a smile, "This child, his mother took him away and raised him for so long, and his father doesn't even recognize him?"

"...No," Jiang Shiyu said, looking at Jiang Xing, "Dad."

"Hey," Jiang Xing replied, smiled and walked over to squeeze his shoulders, and helped carry grandma's things into the car, "Mom, I'll take you home first, remember the medicine you need to take?" ?”

"Remember!" Grandma replied loudly, "You can't die if you eat the wrong food!"

Jiang Shiyu didn't say a word, leaning on the seat.When he got home, he helped grandma put the luggage in the back room, and grandpa left them to eat here. At night, Jiang Xing drove Jiang Shiyu back to his aunt's house.

"I should have taken you home," Jiang Xing said while driving, "but you probably don't want to go back, do you?"

"Is that person there?" Jiang Shiyu looked out the window and asked.

"Yes." Jiang Xing replied.

"I don't understand," Jiang Shiyu looked forward, trying to find Jiang Xing's eyes in the rearview mirror, "Why?"

"Have you wanted to ask me for a long time?" Jiang Xing smiled and parked the car on the side of the road.

He opened the car window, lit a cigarette, and handed Jiang Shiyu another, but Jiang Shiyu didn't pick it up.

"You have changed a lot." Jiang Xing put the cigarette back into the cigarette case, "If it was before, you wouldn't ask me about something you didn't understand, and you wouldn't ask me if that person was at home. Just tell me you're not going."

Jiang Shiyu said nothing.

"Why did it change?" Jiang Xing unbuckled his seat belt, turned to look at Jiang Shiyu.

"Now I'm asking you." Jiang Shiyu said.

Jiang Xing smiled, lit the cigarette, and the smell of smoke instantly filled the entire compartment.

"I have no choice, understand?" Jiang Xing said slowly, "I married your mother... because of pressure, I have no choice but to marry her."

"Is the cheating also due to pressure?" Jiang Shiyu asked.

Jiang Xing smiled and said nothing.

Jiang Shiyu suddenly realized that such a conversation was meaningless at all. It was impossible for him to understand Jiang Xing, and it was impossible for him to find a reasonable reason for him to do so.

He doesn't love his mother, this is the most intuitive thing Jiang Shiyu has experienced.

Like, love, these are some very illusory things, you can talk about it, you can hide it in your heart, but... Who can tell who is true and who is false?

Maybe I like someone now, but I don't like it later, who knows.

Jiang Shiyu opened the car door, Jiang Xing didn't stop him, but said, "Remember to come back and see your grandparents when you have time, they didn't do anything wrong."

Jiang Shiyu looked back at him, noncommittal, walked out, took a taxi back to his aunt's house, and Song Guansheng just came down from the upstairs.

"Hey, are you going to play?" Song Guansheng asked, "There will be a fireworks display in the square tonight, let's go and see it."

"Ah." Jiang Shiyu looked at him.

"Let's go!" Song Guansheng gave him a hand, "Go and see!"

"Hey, isn't this your dress?" Mom picked up a dress and gestured, "I didn't see you wearing it."

"This is from Jiang Shiyu." Yan An took the clothes and folded them.

"It was put here a long time ago. After washing and hanging it up, you can confiscate it." Mom pointed at him, "It's not the clothes of this season anymore!"

"Ouch," Yan An said happily, "I forgot."

"Bad habit." Mom said, carrying all the folded clothes into the room to put them away.

Yan An also carried all the clothes in, and opened the closet. Jiang Shiyu had several clothes with him, and he never took them back.

Sometimes after playing on weekends, Jiang Shiyu would eat at his house and sleep here by the way at night. He changed into a set of clothes and put them here without mentioning that he would take them back. Yan An also forgot. Yes, it was only when my mother mentioned it that I remembered...it was time to return the clothes to Jiang Shiyu.

Otherwise, it's strange that there are so many Jiang Shiyu's clothes hanging in his closet, and there is even a coat.

How long has Jiang Shiyu been gone?

Yan An didn't dare to think about it. Whenever he thought about it, he wanted to comb Xiao Binghai's hair. Little Binghai was almost bald.

But...it's been a long time, right?

There are not many days in the summer vacation and it takes so long.

You can't come back until the summer vacation is over, right?

Or... are you planning to come back?Back to the north?

Yan An threw the clothes into the closet, closed the closet door, frowned and thought for a long time, and finally took out the phone.

"It's a bit noisy!" Song Guan yelled, "There are candied haws sellers over there!"

"Ah!" Jiang Shiyu couldn't hear what he was saying at all.

The sound of fireworks around was too loud, mixed with noisy human voices, which made Jiang Shiyu's head hurt from the noise.

"What do you want to eat!" Song Guansheng continued to yell.

"All—OK—" Jiang Shiyu dragged out the ending, too lazy to yell.

At this moment, the sound of fireworks exploding in the sky is really disturbing. Song Guansheng bought him an apple candy, ate candied haws and went forward, probably to meet up with friends, but Jiang Shiyu didn't follow, planning to watch for a while Just go home by yourself.

People held up their mobile phones to take pictures of the brilliant lights constantly exploding in the sky. The air was filled with the smell of gunpowder. Jiang Shiyu would feel that those sparks seemed to jump on his face. When he recovered, he realized that he was far away from those lights. .

He took out his phone and took a good photo at the right time. He didn't know who pushed him behind him. He didn't look back. He clicked on the photo and looked at it for a long time. He wanted to send it to Yan An, but hesitated. I don't know if I should post it or not.

He hasn't been in touch with Yan An for a long time. On the one hand, it's because of himself, and on the other hand, it's because Yan An's inexplicable energy hasn't passed.

Yan An is a straight man, a straight man who seems to be homophobic.

Jiang Shiyu almost printed out this sentence and hung it in his room, praying three times to the banner every day to stop his uncontrollable mood, he was too sober.

For the moon that can't be picked up at the bottom of the lake, the best stop loss he made was not to go to the lake, and not to get close to it.

Jiang Shiyu didn't understand why the relationship developed like this, maybe it was because Yan An was too kind, as if God stuffed all the good things he hadn't experienced in his previous life on Yan An, and asked Yan An to bring him without asking for anything in return.

Can't like Yan An.

This kind of liking that is destined to be unrequited is unnecessary. When they graduate from high school and distance themselves, their relationship will definitely become estranged. Just like Jiang Xing and his mother, after more than ten years of marriage, they will subtly erase everything. feelings?

Like it or not, is it really that important?

The most important thing is... Yan An has someone he likes, and he won't like him, or even reject him.

Jiang Shiyu put the phone back into his pocket, and was about to pull his hand out of his pocket when a series of vibrations brought him back to his senses, and subconsciously took out the phone, it was a voice call from Yan An.

The voice rang for two seconds and then hung up, and did not call back. Jiang Shiyu waited until the screen automatically turned off, and a video popped up directly.

Jiang Shiyu's fingers point uncontrollably to accept, Yan An's face appears on the screen, it seems to be thinner, it seems to be gone, but it is definitely dark, it is impossible for Yan An's character not to wander outside.

"Jiang Shiyu? Jiang Shiyu!" Yan An yelled, Jiang Shiyu came back to his senses, took out the earphones and put them on, Yan An's voice was completely filled in his ears, and he could barely hear it when the volume was turned up to the maximum.

"Fuck, what are you doing?" Yan An widened his eyes, "It's so noisy!"

"Yeah." Jiang Shiyu stared at the people on the screen for a while, then adjusted the camera to face the sky, "Watch the fireworks."

"... Oh." Yan An stared at the screen intently for a while, and Jiang Shiyu also stared at the screen.

During the interval between the fireworks show, the whole square fell silent. The people whose ears were a little ringing from the sound of the fireworks just started laughing and walking to other places. Jiang Shiyu found a place with few people and shook the candy apple in his hand in front of the camera. shake.

Yan An didn't care about his apple candy, "Are you staying in a hotel now?"

"No," Jiang Shiyu hesitated, and turned the camera to the front, "I live at my aunt's house."

Yan An was stunned for a while looking at Jiang Shiyu's face that suddenly appeared on the screen.

The two of them suddenly stopped talking and stared at the screen in a daze. Jiang Shiyu squatted under a telephone pole, the orange light above his head fell down, and his face was illuminated a little by the light from the screen. Yan An even Can see a blurred shadow of himself in the reflection of his glasses.

The silence caused a lot of embarrassment. They seemed to have been separated for a century, and they couldn't find anything to talk about anymore. Yan An suddenly asked, "How long are you going to stay there?"

"Let's stay a few more days." Jiang Shiyu said.

"The summer vacation is almost over," Yan An fixed the phone, lay down on the table, and muttered, "Just...then what, why don't you come back early to see Little Hail?"

"Ah." Jiang Shiyu responded.

"Xie Lanlan's birthday is coming soon, it just happens to be the last day of summer vacation, I..." Yan An paused for a while, then whispered something, the fireworks next to him rose again and exploded, completely covering Yan An's voice.

Jiang Shiyu raised his hand and pressed the earphone firmly, staring at the screen: "What?"

Yan An opened his mouth and said nothing. What did he want to say just now?Almost blurted out what?No matter what he wanted to say, the good thing was that Jiang Shiyu didn't hear it.

He took a breath cautiously, and just about to speak, Jiang Shiyu said, "The day after tomorrow."

"What?" Yan An asked.

"The day after tomorrow at the latest," Jiang Shiyu said, "I'll be back."

Yan An stared at the screen for a long time, then smiled in relief: "I see."