sweet kiss bitter summer

"Brother Wen Mao——" Tan Xin called Wen Mao, and the sound of footsteps came from the direction of the kitchen. Tan Chen overlapped.

Wen Mao helped bring Tan Chen's luggage into the house, and told Tan Xin very casually: "Brother is back."

Tan Xin was stunned for a while, bit her lower lip, and opened her mouth a little, as if she wanted to say something, but in the end she just returned to the kitchen silently.

Tan Chen put his coat on the back of the sofa in the living room, stood at the door of the kitchen and looked at it for a while, the fire on the stove was burning, and steam was constantly evaporating from the pot. Stir.

She is very thin, wearing a light green pajamas, as thin as an underdeveloped flower branch in spring, her shoulder blades protrude from the surface of the thin cotton pajamas, her wrists and ankles are surprisingly thin, probably because she was too malnourished when she was a child Seriously, no matter how hard I tried to make up, I couldn't see her gaining any flesh.

Perhaps many reasons are the same, Tan Chen thought.

Children need a lot of things to ensure that they can grow up well. Once something is missing during the period, this lack becomes a hole in the body, and no matter how much it gets later, it can't be filled.

As the only blood relative, with an inseparable connection, Tan Chen naturally blamed himself for this debt.

Every time Tan Xin overreacts is like a mirror, reflecting Tan Chen's guilt and self-blame, so he always forgives his sister, restrains himself, and makes amends almost without limits, but in the end it is just futile.

Tan Chen walked to his sister, took the chopsticks from her hand, and continued to stir between the soft noodles cooked in the pot.

Tan Xin turned her body to the side, glanced at Tan Chen, then looked down at Tan Chen's hand, her voice was very small, almost drowned in the bursting sound of bubbles when boiling.

She said: "...Brother, you are back."

Tan Chen said "um", and asked her: "Have you eaten so late?" "I have eaten, and I will let my aunt go after dinner.

This is for Brother Wen Mao. "

Tan Xin's tone was obviously cautious, and she asked Tan Chen, "Brother, have you eaten yet? I'll make one for you too."

She wanted to take back the chopsticks from Tan Chen, but Tan Chen gently refused, saying that she had already eaten.

Tan Xin withdrew her hand awkwardly, and took another two steps away from her, with a look of disappointment on her face, similar to gaining something and losing it again.

After a long time, she asked Tan Chen in a trembling voice, "It's with Liang Luo'an again, isn't it?" Tan Chen put the lid on the pot, looked back at Tan Xin, and found that she was already crying, her scarlet eyes were filled with a kind of Looking at him like hatred or disappointment, the whole body trembled with the frequency of breathing.

He wanted to get closer, but Tan Xin resisted very much, walked quickly with her inflexible legs, and limped away from the kitchen.

Tan Chen turned off the fire on the stove, put down his chopsticks, and followed him out.

The room was very quiet, Tan Chen glanced at the door, the slippers that Wen Mao put on just now were neatly placed on the floor mat, and found that he seemed to have left, leaving the brother and sister an independent space to solve problems very thoughtfully.

Tan Chen followed Tan Xin not far away, called her, and said to her: "Brother has something to tell you, can you listen to it?" "Is there anything good to say?" Xin turned around, her words choked up, but she was aggressive, "I'm a burden, right? Are you fed up with me? You think being Liang Luo'an's brother is happier, so you send him home, and go on business trips with him, together Have a meal."

Tan Xin made a hasty conclusion in despair: "You have your own home, two brothers, and parents, so happy.

And your own sister, I, is a complete outsider, so you will soon leave me behind in order to go back. "

"will not."

Tan Chen denied it very seriously, walked over and wiped the tears hanging from her sister's chin with her fingertips, and gently pushed her shoulder, "Go sit on the sofa, stand still, your legs will hurt."

Tan Xin was still sobbing intermittently, she shook off Tan Chen's hand for the first time, but Tan Chen held her arm very patiently again, she did not resist too much, and was supported by Tan Chen to sit on the sofa.

Tan Chen went to the bathroom and twisted a hot towel to wipe his sister's face, went to the kitchen to warm a glass of milk, and put it on the table in front of her sister.

"Xinxin."

Tan Chen suddenly felt a little nervous at this moment, but as his sister's emotional support at the moment, he could only keep his tone as calm as possible, "Actually, there are some things that my brother has never said to you, but under the current situation, brother Finding that you too are always disturbed by this, I thought I should tell you about it."

"Maybe these words will make you think that brother is a very strange person."

Tan Chen paused, "But brother won't treat you badly because of this, or leave you, brother will always love you, you know?" Tan Xin looked straight at Tan Chen, as if listening to what Tan Chen said However, he still maintained a state of vigilance and asked, "What is it? Is it something related to Liang Luo'an?" Tan Chen nodded and said, "My brother wants to tell you that my brother likes Liang Luo'an." install."

He pursed his lower lip nervously, and continued to speak slowly, "My brother also likes you, but the two likes are very different and do not conflict.

Brother's love for Liang Luo'an... is the kind of love that he wants to fall in love with and wants to get married. "

The corners of the lonely and reluctant lips looked like Tan Chen was laughing at himself, "So brother has become a strange person?" Tan Xin just frowned, without expressing too much expression or speaking.

Tan Chen also said: "Many people can't accept it, how can a man like a man, just like Luo'an's family, they don't accept this matter now.

So if you think your brother is strange and unacceptable, he will not force you, nor will he mention this matter in front of you.

Your elder brother will not be less kind to you than before. If you feel that your elder brother has changed, you can tell him or lose your temper. But don’t think that your elder brother will abandon you, because your elder brother needs you very much. "

"Because my parents are gone, it's just you and me, we are a complete family."

Time paused for a long time, Tan Xin's eyes moved slightly, she picked up the milk cup in front of her and took a sip from her mouth, the temperature spreading on her lips soon turned into warm liquid gushing out of her eyes.

Same as at this moment, Tan Xin is not unable to see the very restrained and forbearable sadness that appeared on Tan Chen's face countless times in the past, on the contrary, perhaps because she has been hurt a lot since she was a child, her emotions are more fragile and sensitive Some, so she can carefully detect every bit of Tan Chen's emotions.

But in reality, she is very conflicted.

Most of the time, she uses this ability to be a sensible and good sister in exchange for the qualification not to be bored or abandoned.

But after all, there are many kinds of human emotions. There are always many people to share in friendship, family or love. This will make Tan Xin feel a sense of crisis, like a small animal that smells danger, and falls into a state of stress that is difficult to control.

She knew she shouldn't be like this, but every time Tan Chen's guilty and terrified expression became a tranquilizer for her to get whatever she wanted, the morbid dependence so induced made Tan Xin selfish. The sharp edge of emotion pierced into Tan Chen's heart.

Because in an unbalanced debt, someone has to be more sad.

But seeing Tan Chen's expression at the moment, such silent and peaceful sadness, Tan Xin felt turbulent, and completely overturned the barriers she had built.

She used to think that her brother was like a white island, which could only anchor her small boat that was precarious.

She used the drift scars on the ship to ask the island to isolate the surrounding sea, so the island dried up into a lonely sandbar, but she was not happy because she was no longer injured.

Even if symbiosis isn't exactly the right mode of survival, she definitely doesn't want to see Shazhou die because of her.

She thought, maybe she should try to let go of herself, and try to be considerate of her brother.

As for my brother's confession, about men liking men, perhaps Tan Xin would think that this is slightly biased against the normal world, but what does it matter.

As long as Tan Chen is her brother and her family, if no one understands, she can be the only one.

"elder brother."

Tan Xin stretched out her hand and tugged on Tan Chen's cuff, "You're not surprised, and you're already a very good brother."

Tan Chen shook her cold hand, "You are also a very good sister."

Tan Xin couldn't help crying after hearing this, and wiped away her tears, Tan Chen leaned on her shoulder and hugged her gently.

"Brother, I'm still scared."

Tan Xin buried her head on Tan Chen's shoulder and cried, and asked sullenly: "You like Liang Luo'an, if you are with him, won't you become far away from me?" "This is a difficult question to explain, But the answer is no.

Xinxin herself is also growing up, and she will meet someone she likes in the future, and then she will understand that liking is neither sharing nor separation. "

Tan Chen thought for a while, and then said: "And a long time ago, Luo'an told me that when we can be independent, we will take you over together, and we won't be wronged anymore.

He will care about you and treat you as well as his brother, and will love you more. "

Tan Xin got up from Tan Chen's shoulder, turned her head to one side, looking a bit stubborn, "You didn't do it then.

Although you have done it now, he has not. "

Tan Chen smiled and said, "Yes, I will in the future."

Tan Xin cried until her eyes were red and she was very tired. She drank the milk in the cup and said in a nasal voice, "Brother, let me serve you the noodles I just cooked."