mark of the rain gl

The rain in April always comes lightly.

Raindrops stick to the petals of the soft white chrysanthemums, and the people in the black and white portraits are smiling quietly. In the silence, there seems to be a low sense of sadness spreading around.

On the Ching Ming Festival, Qiu Zixin followed Ms. Yang and Mr. Liang to the cemetery to pay respects to Ms. Yang's deceased parents.

Is it that after a person dies, the mistakes made by the other person during his lifetime no longer seem so worth pursuing?

Qiu Zixin rarely saw such a lonely expression on Ms. Yang's face. Fortunately, Mr. Liang was there to comfort her.If only Qiu Zixin was alone, she might be a little at a loss.

Every time this season, the atmosphere at home will always become sad.

Back at home in Q City, Mr. Liang had just left to go back to the company to deal with customer issues. Ms. Yang closed her eyes and rested on the sofa due to exhaustion.

"Take a sip, Ms. Yang, so you can relax." Qiu Zixin sat down beside her, and glanced at Ms. Yang.

Ms. Yang lowered her eyes, staring at the teacup with a sad expression, "Are you still...don't want to call me mother...?"

Qiu Zixin lowered her head, half of her face was submerged in the dark corner of the light, "I just... can't call you that for the time being."

Ms. Yang put her hand on the back of her hand and said in a low voice: "Xiaoxin...Although I have never told you frankly about some things, I still hope you can understand."

"The me in the past...couldn't even be sure about my own future, let alone raising a child alone."

"After divorcing your father, I sent you abroad only because I didn't have the courage to take on this responsibility at that time."

"You are not necessarily the child expected to be born, but you are definitely not the one who is hated by others."

Seemingly incomprehensible emotions surged in his heart, Qiu Zixin lifted his chin, and his eyes unconsciously settled on the thin silver strands on the top of the opponent's hair.

"Xiaoxin, I hope you can let go of the past completely and don't need to take those medicines..." Ms. Yang lowered her eyes, recalling the pills Qiu Zixin had just swallowed in the car.

"You know, I'm not young anymore, people are like this a lot of times, many things can only be let go after many years."

Ms. Yang reached out to caress Qiu Zixin's cheek, "At least, your current father and I really love you."

Qiu Zixin was a little dazed. In her memory, Ms. Yang had always been a very strong person who was unwilling to show weakness to others.

When I was young, on the day I sent myself away, Ms. Yang didn't even give me a hug as a souvenir, so she turned around and left without looking back.

So far away, the mother's back.

It is obvious that she often refuses to pay attention to her mother with a straight face, but now she talks to herself in such a low voice.

Qiu Zixin pursed her lips and felt Ms. Yang's fingertips gently stroking her hot cheeks, "Even if Mr. Liang and I leave in the future, you still have to remember..."

"Please don't say those words."

Qiu Zixin said suddenly.There was helpless sadness in his voice.

"What left...? You never made it up to me."

"Please don't be so irresponsible..."

Qiu Zixin lowered her head, and her voice seemed thin in the air. Ms. Yang looked at her with a sudden pain in her heart. She leaned forward and hugged Qiu Zixin without leaving any gaps.

"If I had hugged you like this at that time, I would definitely have the heart to send you away..." Ms. Yang said softly, stroking her back.

"Actually, what Liang Sheng and I hope to see the most is that you have someone to rely on, and someone to accompany you to the end."

"I understand how painful it is to marry someone you don't love, so I won't force you, Xiaoxin."

"As long as you like it, even if the other person is not so perfect, as long as it makes you happy, Liang Sheng and I... will support your choice."

Ms. Yang let go of her, and said firmly but tenderly.

The mobile phone placed on the table rang softly, and Qiu Zixin stared at Ms. Yang with deep eyes, then settled down again, looking hesitant to speak, as if she had something to express She is hesitating.

Silently, Qiu Zixin felt a burning sensation on her body. She clenched her palms tightly, looked directly at her mother, and tried to say in a calm and steady tone:

"I...if I say, I..."

"...I already have someone I want to be with for the rest of my life."

"Damn."

"It's all damn it."

Thin rain fell from the sky. In the smoking area of ​​a certain office building, Fu Meixuan lit a cigarette, fidgeting and watching the movement in the corridor outside.

Her complexion is a little pale now, and she looks haggard and thinner. She has smoked countless cigarettes since she came in.If one is not enough, I will have a second one, as if to burn all the sorrows with the cigarette butt, and let it disappear with the ashes.

Fu Meixuan coughed several times in succession, feeling some pain in her head, and the involvement of her nerves made her so uncomfortable that she couldn't straighten her back.

The security guard standing outside watched Fu Meixuan's every move, hesitating whether to drive her out, but since she and Miss Xie knew each other and didn't really want to act... Although I don't know why the superior gave The answer was that Miss Xie didn't want to see her.

Fu Meixuan stood up uneasily, and dialed the phone again, just like the other party didn't answer.

The woman clenched her fists, her heart was burning with anxiety, if it wasn't for the front desk and security guards, she would have rushed to find Xie Kexuan.

Thinking of this, she lowered her head and took a puff of cigarette, her cheeks sunken, her fingers trembling slightly.

In the past few years, she has been entangled with Xie Kexuan.Even if the other party is married, Fu Meixuan is determined not to let go, even if the other party has a child, Fu Meixuan still can't let go of the obsession in her heart.

Often the more deeply in love with the party, the more difficult it is to leave gracefully.

Fu Meixuan often thinks back to the past nights when she and Xie Ke lingered together.She looked into her eyes, with such blurred but penetrating eyes, revealing every inch of her heart and body to herself without any concealment.

She caressed Xie Kexuan's face, weakened rarely, and said waveringly:

"Keep spinning, sometimes..."

"I will feel as if you still love me...but..."

"I never said I didn't love you."

Xie Kexuan attached the back of Fu Meixuan's hand, she turned her head and leaned against the palm of the woman's hand, staring at her, with countless twists and turns in her eyes.

"It's reality, it's life that forces me to leave you..."

"Meixuan, tell me...it would be great if I were a man." She lowered her head and kissed the back of Fu Meixuan's finger.

"But I... am not."

"My mother was diagnosed with uterine cancer last month, my cousin needs to go to college, and the only pillar of my family is me... Can you understand, Mi Xuan."

Fu Meixuan slowly withdrew her hand, turned her face away, and said in a low voice:

"I... don't want to understand."

Obviously the real third party is that man... He is the one who intervened between us.

Fu Meixuan hated all of this. She hated that man, hated this woman who could easily leave her. Similarly, she also hated herself who was powerless.

Being so filthy, unbearable, and despicable, he desperately grabbed Xie Kexuan and refused to let go.

Fu Meixuan deeply remembered that when Xie Kexuan came to the North Courtyard, the uncle at home was so annoyed that he pulled Fu Meixuan's arm on the spot because he discovered their relationship, and cursed:

"You shameless coward!"

"Why do you continue to associate with that woman!? Being a mistress is not enough, do you still have to help others raise their children!?"

Fu Meixuan still remembers his uncle's horrifying look bloodshot with anger, his ferocious gaze, the hot slap on his face, and the scolding voice that was as sharp as the tip of a knife:

"Are you awake!? How can you tell me to explain to your dead father like this? The Fu family's face will be lost by you, a dead homosexual!"

His scolding alarmed the school teachers next door, Xie Kexuan immediately asked them for help, looking at Fu Meixuan, he turned back and begged her uncle not to beat Fu Meixuan again.

There is always a gap between the strength of men and women, not to mention that Fu Meixuan is facing a man who is almost insane.

Fu Meixuan was thrown to the ground by the opponent, Xie Kexuan was about to go to defend her, but his uncle kicked her away in a fit of anger.

The scene was very chaotic for a while. For the first time in her life, Fu Meixuan spoke rudely to the elders in her family. In the past, no matter how willful she was, she still knew how to measure it, but this time it was different.

Uncle grabbed her by the hand and insisted on dragging her away from this ghostly place. He also cursed and warned Fu Meixuan:

"If you dare to meet this woman named Xie again, I will break your legs. You know who your uncle is, and you will do what you say."

In the end, it was Gu Beichen and Xiao Yiyan who arrived in time and pulled the person away, otherwise Fu Meixuan's arm would be dislocated in a short time with her uncle's pulling method.

After that, Xie Kexuan was unwilling to meet Fu Meixuan again, even though Fu Meixuan approached her many times, Xie Kexuan was still unwilling to meet with him.

Damn.

This damn everything.

Fu Meixuan was trembling with anxiety, she couldn't wait to stand up and rush out the door, the security guard was startled by her, and quickly stopped her:

"Miss Fu, please don't...! Ahem, smoking is prohibited in the office area, please go back to..."

But Fu Meixuan suddenly grabbed the other party's sleeve, and his red eyes were bloodshot, and said urgently:

"Please, let me see Xie Kexuan, please!"

"I'm sorry Miss Fu...I want to help you too, but this is out of my control..."

"Let me see her!" She suddenly gritted her teeth and said harshly.

"Call that selfish and weak dog woman to come out and meet me!!!"

The employees in this area couldn't help being frightened when they heard the dispute. Some came to watch, and some called other security guards to come over. In the noisy morning, Fu Meixuan became an almost crazy and uneducated woman.

until that woman appeared.

"Have you had enough trouble, Fu Meixuan?"

"Can you please don't come to the company if there is something wrong?"

Xie Kexuan took Fu Meixuan out, and the two entered the elevator. Xie Kexuan's expression was very bad. Just when her embarrassing and embarrassing anger was about to erupt, the person behind her suddenly hugged her.

"You know I can't live without you..."

Fu Meixuan hugged her so tightly that Xie Kexuan was almost breathless. She struggled to get out, but the people behind her ruthlessly forced her to be imprisoned in front of her.

"Why... Xie Kexuan, why are you not sad at all...? Why can you just let it go..."

The person behind him seemed to have suddenly lost all his strength, and leaned his head against Xie Kexuan's neck. The trembling breath of the woman's voice, as well as the wet tears, all pierced Xie Kexuan's flesh like silver needles.

Xie Kexuan was stunned, the wound that had been buried in his heart began to rot in pain because of the woman's words.

If the society was more tolerant of them, if her family could allow her to pursue, if she was not afraid of any eyes and criticism from the outside world...

But at this moment, the material and benefits are realistically placed in front of her.

Besides... there is no if in this world.

"Beauty Xuan..." Xie Ke turned around, and the elevator descended from the tall building. In this alone space for two, they faced each other honestly for the first time.

No longer evading responsibility, no longer indulging in the past, looking directly at the suffering and embarrassing situation of the two of them.

At the age of more than 30, there are indeed many things to worry about. The willfulness and recklessness of youth should have been replaced by reason.

"Mei Xuan..." She whispered her former lover's name again.

Xie Kexuan hugged her tightly, and his fingers penetrated into Fu Meixuan's long hair. This was the first formal hug between the two of them in a long time.

Also the last one.

"Let's... stop this shit."

"What you want... I am destined to not be able to give you."

Xie Kexuan's voice fell softly in her ears, but Fu Meixuan felt as if someone had force-fed several tons of drugs in her head, and the pain continued to expand repeatedly, occupying the nerve lines of her whole body and forcing her to stop thinking .

So this is finally coming to an end, isn't it?

Fu Meixuan shook her head desperately without even thinking about it, and begged her earnestly, "Don't...why...Ke Xuan, don't do this..."

"... Big deal, big deal, let me take a step back and go to the head office. I won't come to the company again, and I won't go to your house anymore. I can... I can wait for that man to go out..."

"Your child...I can take care of it for you too, right, I must still have something you can use, right...?"

Fu Meixuan was going crazy with anxiety, her eyes were bloodshot, and tears were streaming down her cheeks. She looked haggard at the moment, like a very sick mad woman, trying her best to support herself not to die on the spot with her broken soul.

Xie Kexuan bit his cheek to hold back his crying, "Meixuan...I don't want you to love me so humblely..."

"I'm sorry for you, you should scold me and beat me, at least that way I can feel better..."

The reflections of the two were reflected in the mirror of the elevator, thinking that this was the last meeting with Fu Meixuan, Xie Kexuan finally couldn't help but shed tears.

Her fingertips caressed Fu Meixuan's thin face with lingering affection, and told her softly before parting.

"Quit smoking in the future, okay?"

Fu Meixuan's mind was full of thoughts not to be separated from her, but she couldn't listen to what Xuan said, she just begged him not to leave.

The elevator came to the lobby on the bottom floor with a ding, and Xie Kexuan let her go completely.The elevator door slowly opened to both sides, and the outdoor sunlight poured cruelly on Xie Kexuan's body.

The last words she said to Fu Meixuan were:

"I just called your uncle...go back with him."

On the rainy day, God kept crying as if mourning something.

The bustling street was sparsely populated, and there were a few puddles on the ground, and the raindrops continuously rippled on the water.

The pace of life in this city is like this, sometimes slow and sometimes fast.Gather all kinds of human beings, happy or sad, there are always thousands of complex emotions shuttled between day and night.

In rainy days, umbrellas of different colors gather together, each heading in a different direction.Holding an umbrella, Qiu Zixin ran towards a certain direction in the underground passage quickly and without a clue.

"Mei Xuan, Mei Xuan!" Qiu Zixin called out eagerly.No one answered her.

It took a long time before she found the down and dirty woman at the back of the waste area.

"Fu Meixuan..." Qiu Zixin stopped in disbelief, then bent down again, trying to hug Fu Meixuan with his own strength.

It was the first time she saw Fu Meixuan's dejected appearance in her life, dirty and disheveled clothes, unkempt messy long hair, and blood-stained, bloated right knee.

Qiu Zixin didn't know what she could do for her now, she tried hard to find words and countermeasures in the panic, and only heard Fu Meixuan whispering weakly in her ear in the quiet underground tunnel.

"Xiaoxin... my foot... hurts..."

"Can you... call Ke to spin out for me, I want to see her..."

She tugged at Qiu Zixin's skirt feebly, her voice was so dry and hoarse that she was about to lose her voice, like a withered flower that was dehydrated and about to wilt.

Qiu Zixin suddenly became hoarse, she couldn't bear to see her friend for many years reduced to such a state.

She supported Fu Meixuan, and while calming her emotions, she kept telling herself to be calm.

"Don't think about that, Meixuan, I'll take you to the doctor..."

"I know it will be difficult to do it for a while, but... I will accompany you, step by step."

"...Let's forget about her."

Fu Mei lifted her chin and looked at Qiu Zixin with cloudy eyes, "Forget about her...?"

"Can it be done...?"

After finishing speaking, Fu Meixuan chuckled again with self-pity, and shook his head while asking himself an answer.

The author has something to say: I will try to finish this article within 3-4 months

Come and help me urge more~

Special thanks to the little angel who irrigated the nutrient solution! :

April Day 47 bottles;

20 bottles of Xiaoxiaoxue;

3775244420 bottles;

16 bottles of Vivian;

Si Tian's Shi Yi 12 bottles;

Send Chaoyun 10 bottles;

10 bottles of a pencil;

6 bottles of orange;

6 bottles of Thorndike's kitten;

aloha5 bottles;

Alfira 2 bottles;

2 bottles of Mirror;