Swimmer of Rebirth

The light in the bedroom was on, and the light fell on Yao Ye's face, Liu Yang could see it clearly.

Yao Ye was lying on his side, his eyes fell on his face laxly, his eyes were moistened with a film of water, his brows were tightly frowned, and a drop of transparent liquid was slipping from the corner of his eyes.

Liu Yang's pupils shrank sharply.

He really, plainly saw the deep feelings that had been suppressed in the past from these eyes, the pain contained in the love, the reluctance in the nostalgia, this struggle, no longer concealed, completely unfolded before his eyes.

Liu Yang's heart felt like a hammer, and a pang of sourness welled up in his eyes.

this person……

Liu Yang didn't know how to answer him, his brain was in a mess.

There is an old saying that speaks the truth after drinking.

Maybe Yao Ye didn't even know what he said, but it really touched Liu Yang.

Liu Yang raised his hand, stroked his face, gently wiped away his tears, and smiled, "I won't leave."

Yao Ye blinked, then smiled.

There were still tears in his eyes, his brows were tightly frowned, but the corners of his mouth were grinning upwards, revealing his bright white teeth.

He said: "I'm disgusting, right? I actually like men, but what should I do? I'm sick, crazy, they all think homosexuality is disgusting, but I don't want to, I can't help it, and I don't want to be Treating people as crazy, you...would you look down on me? Would you think I was disgusting? "

Yao Ye's expression was very strange. After finishing these words with a smile, his eyelashes fluttered up and down, wet with tears, but it was uglier than crying.

Liu Yang was enveloped by this pair of eyes, he was dazed and flustered inside, without confidence, without the radiant brilliance of the past, as if he had lost his goal, his eyes were covered by fog, and he couldn't see the target in those eyes all the time.

A breath of despair infected the entire space.

Liu Yang sighed, covered Yao Ye's eyes, and blocked the eyes that made him wonder what to do.

Yao Ye struggled to break his hand away.

Drunk people are very strong, and Yao Ye himself is stronger than Liu Yang, Liu Yang's hand was easily pulled away.

Yao Ye said, "Let me take another look at you, okay? I know you're avoiding me, just this once, let me take a good look, and never get close to you again, okay?"

This is a very humble tone, this person begged him with this tone, Liu Yang could only feel the bitterness in his mouth.

He looked at this man, and suddenly felt that this man was not the one he had always been aiming at and wanted to surpass. This man was not Yao Ye, the man who was destined to attract the attention of the world and stand upright forever.

Feeling distressed, Liu Yang suddenly hated himself, because he made this man so weak and humble.

Looking at this face, the palms stained with tears seemed to be dripping hot lava, scalding through the flesh and sticking to the bones, a little bit of corrosion, the body seemed to be burned.

Liu Yang suddenly didn't understand what he was insisting on. During the time of separation, he thought of this person again and again, and it seemed that he was repeatedly imprinted in his heart again and again. Looking back again, the memory of getting along was so vivid, he smiled Happy and content, he likes this feeling, the feeling of being loved by others.

As they looked at each other, Yao Ye's eyes gradually became hollow, and when the last bit of strength was exhausted, he closed his eyes tiredly and passed out drunk.

Liu Yang raised his hand and gently wiped away the last bit of moisture from his eye sockets. His thumb slid across the bridge of his nose, and finally stayed on this thick lip, stroking from one corner of his mouth to the other.

Bloody, soft, and moist, the air exhaled from the tip of his nose poured onto his fingers, which was almost unbearably hot for him.

The thumb trembled slightly.

He lowered his eyelids and closed them, his pupils were dark and far-reaching, his upper body was supported by his arms, his head was tilted slightly, and he approached inch by inch, like the slow motion of a movie, all senses were dulled at this moment.

three inches.

two inches.

one inch.

The alcohol exhaled by the other party was inhaled, passed through the throat, buried in the lungs, and spread to the limbs and bones.

The arms supporting the body seemed unbearable, and the whole body was trembling slightly.

Liu Yang's eyes flickered again and again, looking at the lips that were so close.

Let's go... let's go.

He told himself, go on kissing, so that this person will not be so painful anymore, and make himself feel better.

Across this single-plank bridge, let two people stand in the same place at the same time.

but……

This step is so difficult.

Liu Yang sighed suddenly, let go of his arms, and fell down on the bed.

face, wiping the bed sheet and leaning towards Yao Ye, his forehead pressed tightly against him, feeling the temperature from there.

He closed his eyes in pain.

Time, he needs time.

Liu Yang opened his eyes and looked at Yao Ye's sleepy face, opened and closed his lips, and said silently: I'm sorry, give me some more time.

Yao Ye slept very deeply this time, and didn't wake up until after 10 o'clock in the morning. He sat on the edge of the bed and pressed his forehead, his head was in a mess.

Memories of last night flashed through my head 2 minutes after waking up.

He wasn't sure what he said, his chest was so congested.

A sense of dread as if everything was over swept over him.

He didn't even dare to check if Liu Yang was still in the dormitory.

He bent down, resting his forehead heavily on the arms resting between his knees.

Regret constantly haunted him.

He almost hated himself to death.

Why go to drink.

Why drink to death.

Why did you tell others about your sexuality?

Why is there such a damn confession memory.

If you are drunk to death, you can simply die without knowing anything.

The emotion of wanting to escape kept popping up in his brain.

Leave here and return to a familiar place, where he can protect himself.

Leaving Liu Yang, as if nothing had happened, he was still the considerate Yao Ye, and Liu Yang was still the person with a bright smile.

but……

he asked himself.

is it possible?

Everything happened, and there was no escape for him, he couldn't get out of here.

It is his dream to train himself so that his swimming performance will continue to improve and his life will go as far as possible.

Dreams and love are intertwined, but let him make a choice.

But both are out of his control.

Even sadder, he couldn't find the balance in it.

Splitting headache.

He got up and went into the bathroom.

Standing under the shower head, the cold liquid poured on the face, pooled into streams and flowed across the chest, gathered under the feet, and finally flowed to the drain and disappeared without a trace.

The chaotic brain is barely awake.

He lowered his eyes to look at the entrance of the sewer, showing a wry smile, the water was irreversible, but he couldn't let this emotion control himself.

Time will always pass by every minute and every second, and you won't do it all over again because of regret.

Belonging to Yao Ye, his life will still go on.

He has already confessed everything, and now, he can only passively wait for the moment of sentencing.

His ultimate relief can only come from Liu Yang's answer.

Yao Ye didn't dare to think how Liu Yang would reply him.

But there is always more hope than despair.

This is the essence of human yearning for beauty.

Of course, more often than not, it is an illusion of self-deception.

The sound of the door being closed came from outside the bathroom, Yao Ye raised his head suddenly, as if he wanted to see Liu Yang's expression through the door.

Is it nausea, or fear, or a smile in anticipation.

Yao Ye thought it was funny, he knew Liu Yang, this person has the ability to whitewash the peace, he can bury everything cleanly, from this month of getting along, and the calm way of handling his feelings, he can It can be seen that this is a child who does not look like a 14-year-old.

The maturity surprised him.

It made him unable to control it.

It is also a crucial factor that attracts his attention.

Firm eyes, careful thinking, attitude in dealing with things, bright smile, 14 years old, a complex of contradictions, in this world, he will never find another person like Liu Yang.

Like a magnet, it tightly attracted his gaze, and when he looked back again, this feeling was too strong for him to bear.

There is always a time when the shower is over, and when he goes out, he subconsciously packs himself up neatly, shaved off the new stubble, patted his face, made his cheeks tinged with blood, stretched the hem of his clothes, and even He took a breath out of his palm and smelled it for any peculiar smell.

Careful, wanting to show the best side in front of Liu Yang.

Even if that moment did come, he couldn't show the frustration and pain in his heart.

This is his pride.

In fact, the moment he saw Liu Yang, he almost softened his body in surprise.

When he opened the bathroom door, he took a breath, his chest puffed out, his back was straightened, his chin was lifted slightly, and he even pulled the corner of his mouth to show a smile that he thought was natural.

But in the next second, the air in his chest was spit out in surprise, his mouth was slightly opened, and he wiped his eyes again and again, not believing what he saw.

Liu Yang stood in the kitchen directly opposite the bathroom, wearing an apron, holding a fruit knife in his hand, staring wide-eyed, gnashing his teeth to cut the meat on the panel.

The light outside the window fell on Liu Yang's body, carrying a hazy beauty.

Yao Ye blinked and moved two points closer.

Liu Yang raised his head to look at him when he heard the voice, smiled naturally, then shrugged helplessly, and continued to lower his head to cut meat.

The scene in front of him was so weird that the entanglement in Yao Ye's head disappeared instantly, and he asked him curiously, "What are you doing?"

"Cooking." Liu Yang glanced at him sideways, "I almost vomit after eating steak and fish steaks every day."

"You know how to cook?" Yao Ye moved closer to Liu Yang. He looked down at the sliced ​​and shredded meat on the cutting board, "What are you doing?"

"Stir-fried beef and curry beef." Liu Yang pursed his lips and said dissatisfiedly, "I didn't see fresh meat in the nearby supermarket, so I had to get the beef from the refrigerator." After finishing speaking, Liu Yang slowly Slowly lowering the knife, feeling very unfamiliar, Yao Ye was afraid that what he would eat later would be beef with human blood.

Liu Yang cut for a while, looked up at him, inhaled the fragrance of the bath, and his eyes flickered, "Hey, why are you looking at me? Although I can't buy other dishes, the rice really makes me I met it, it’s northeast rice, it’s in the pot, go and look it up.”

"Flip!?" Yao Ye looked away from the meat on the cutting board and landed on Liu Yang's face.

"It's cooking porridge. You drank so much yesterday. I don't think you can eat anything. The porridge is yours, and the meat is mine. Take care of your own lunch."

When Yao Ye heard this, his face suddenly collapsed. He moved to the porridge bowl and stirred it a few times before looking at Liu Yang, watching him lower his head and focus on cutting the meat, and at the plaid apron he wore around his body. Happiness.

He is not sure whether Liu Yang has accepted him.

But for now this outcome seems to be the best so far.

And Liu Yang's behavior couldn't help but surprised him again.

The first embarrassing meeting after what happened last night was easily diverted, naturally even he didn't feel awkward.

Liu Yang was so stared at by Yao Ye that he was about to explode.

I really want to knock on this elm head and ask him if he knows what it means to find the steps by yourself?Or do you really think that everyone in the world has lost their memory and forgot what happened last night?Or is it that the person Yao Xiaoye confessed to after drinking is a cat or a dog, or is it Liu Yang?

Liu Yang secretly shed tears, feeling that he was very sad, he was easy, he hadn't cooked for many years, it was still in the middle of the day, under the sun, he went to four or five supermarkets in a row, Just to find a bag of rice.

Looking at the knife in his hand, Liu Yang thought maliciously, if the knife stabbed into Yao Ye's stomach, the world would be quiet, and he wouldn't be so anxious.

The two of them muffled their voices, thinking about themselves.

The beef in Liu Yang's hand was sliced ​​thinly, and then fell down with a knife and cut into shreds.

The spoon in Yao Ye's hand circled around the inside of the pot, making a slight noise as the rice grains turned in the white water.

Just like an old couple, a quiet atmosphere surrounds them.

After the meat was cut, Liu Yang poured oil on it and heated it up. The beef fell down and made a crackling sound.

Yao Ye watched Liu Yang jump far away to avoid the hot oil splashing in the wok, and then stared at the meat in the wok, without thinking, he took out a spoon from the porridge pot and fiddled with it.

"Wow—" There was a loud noise, and the water and hot oil reacted directly.

Yao Ye hopped faster than a rabbit, and stood with Liu Yang foolishly looking at the frying pan splashed with oil.

Liu Yang glared at him sideways, and cursed bitterly, "Pig." He rushed up and began to fiddle with him.

Yao Ye looked at Liu Yang's frightened expression and his trembling hands, and suddenly burst out laughing.

In fact, Yao Ye can't really be blamed for this.

He lived to be 20 years old. He started to learn to swim when he was 5 years old. He started to live in school when he was 9 years old. He trained, did laundry, and cleaned up. There is a cafeteria in the house, and the organizers will contract for competitions when they go out, and their parents will take care of them when they return home. It is not an exaggeration for Yao Ye to be called an idiot when it comes to cooking.

Uh, at that time, it was a truth that children understood that hot oil would explode when it met water, but Mr. Yao just made a mistake in his busy schedule, and the more he helped, the more busy he became.

Curry beef takes a long time, and it happens that cooking porridge also takes some time, so Liu Yang asked Yao Ye to watch it inside, and went outside to rest by himself.

Liu Yang sat on the sofa for a while, thought for a while, then went to Yao Ye's bedroom and opened the window to get rid of the strong smell of alcohol in the room.

The light from outside the window slanted in, and Liu Yang's eyes fell on the big bed in the middle of the bedroom.

He woke up in the middle of the night on this bed last night. First, he was not used to sleeping with someone next to him. Second, if two people woke up together on this bed, he didn't even know how to face Yao Ye's situation. eyes.

He sighed, unable to imagine if Yao Ye had said these words while awake last night, would he have really agreed.

He had to admit that he couldn't calmly look at the painful expression on that face, because his heart was already shaking, and he was drawn by this person named Yao Ye, so he couldn't ignore it.

But he also tried, kissing a man, but it made him resist instinctively.

Next, he thought, was his problem, and he needed time to debug himself.

Moreover, what he needs most now is to confirm that he does not accept this person out of sympathy...