Kitten's Escape from Marriage

A few days before the wedding...

The nightmare that the kitten can't open, how can I forget two years ago:

It was evening, and the rays of sunlight covered the rows of bamboo buildings.

That day, he was standing outside the gate of the village, biting a carrot, and before he had time to say hello, he said, "My little lynx at the foot of the West Mountain... was surrounded by the servants of the headman who came out, crying and howling:

"Miss, you have only been out for a day, why are you like this!"

"Miss, come into the house quickly, the headman is looking for you, your hair is all white, look at you child, you are such an adult, you still don't know how to take care of yourself!"

"Don't talk about it, let the eldest lady come in, two days will be a happy day, let the people over there see it, what is it like!"

"Miss, I think that boy is a bit rigid, but he is not bad at heart!"

"Yes, miss, don't worry about children talking..."

The chattering voice made the little bobcat very sure that they got the wrong person!

First of all he is a man!Secondly he is an orphan!And poor and white.

Little Shanmao thought to himself that these stupid people, men and women are not distinguished, but this saves my little Shanmao the trouble of meeting the first person.Immediately, I feel at ease... I just feel that the good day when Titque'er is wearing a bright red wedding dress and shyly follows him into the bridal chamber is not far away...

Ha ha ha ha……

Ha ha ha ha……

Before he had time to distinguish, his little bobcat would be sent directly to the woodshed by the headman:

"Who sent you as a spy?" The leader sat on a chair, with a whip in his hand, barbed!Ruthless as a Rakshasa!

"Master, I'm just a little bobcat raised in the temple at the foot of the mountain in the west. Because I have no money, I want to come to you to find a job!"

The little bobcat knelt on the ground, and the two big men behind him would try to make up for his poor ass at any moment.At this moment, this butt has left an unknown number of footprints.

"The temple at the foot of the mountain in the west?" The headman's voice sank, and a hint of surprise flashed by.

"Yes, Master Ah Sang is my master!" The little bobcat looked at the nail board under the headman's feet and felt sweaty.

"What do you use the money for?" The headman took a cup of tea and sipped it carefully.

"Returning to lead the adults, the younger ones just have no money to marry a daughter-in-law, thinking that the leader must need manpower to marry a young lady, so I came..."

"You have a good brain?" The headman sneered.

"No money!" Little Shanmao laughed dryly, but was dripping with cold sweat!

"I think you are here to pretend to be a young lady and to steal, Agui, what should you do with the theft?" the leader said coldly, ready to get up.

"Master, chop off your hands!" Agui replied immediately.

"Leader, I've been wronged, I've been wronged! The little Shanmao dared not take your advice!" The little Shanmao immediately hugged Appa, the leader of Lingxi Legs, crying like ghosts and howling like wolves.

Everyone wanted to kick the little lynx away, but the Apa head waved them away and said: "Now everyone says that the eldest lady is back. If I don't punish you, how can I explain to my people who you are?"

"Find something to do!" The little bobcat continued to hold the headman's thigh.

"Then how did you get in?" the leader asked.Little Lynx was silent, the way he came in was indeed deception.

"Please let the leader spare the little Shanmao, the little Shanmao is willing to serve you in the future! No wages for the rest of his life! Heartbroken." The little Shanmao felt that the leader didn't kick him away immediately, so he must have a way to survive, and instinctively grabbed this last survive.

"Speaking of which, I think you are nimble and quick-witted, but if you think about it, there is one thing that really needs you right now, it depends on whether you have this loyalty?" The headman continued to sit back on the wooden chair.

Little Shanmao kowtowed immediately, saying that he would do everything from the mountain of swords to the sea of ​​fire, and he would never let the leader down.

So the headman said: "You also know that the eldest lady has not been found yet."

Little Shanmao nodded and said: "The little one will go and find it, even if..."

"You can't find her! I have someone to find her!" The headman smiled and was calculating.

The little lynx was puzzled, and looked up at the leader.

The headman said: "The day after tomorrow will be an auspicious day for marriage selection from above. You can marry her on her behalf!"

"The head...the head...I...I am...a man!" Xiao Shanmao couldn't understand this logic at all, and couldn't make a sentence. He had heard countless legends, but he had never heard of a man marrying a woman.

"You... don't want to? Agui..." the headman frowned.

"I am willing!" Little Shanmao said immediately, thinking that even ghosts and snakes would marry him!

"I knew that you are a smart person, and smart people will always have good results!" The leader laughed.

The little bobcat was decadent.

But the headman then said: "Don't worry, anyone who is loyal to me, Appa, will have a good life!"

The little lynx raised its eyes, and the leader patted the little lynx on the head. It was really "kindness"!He said, "As soon as Missy comes back, I'll give you money to hold a wedding for you, how about letting you marry your sweetheart?"

The little bobcat's eyes were bright.

The headman said: "To show my sincerity, you can have this silver jewelry as long as you are in Shicheng from now on!" A woman carried a tray of silver jewelry from head to toe.

The little lynx's eyes are brighter!

The leader said: "However, you must remember to do a good job. The so-called doing a good job is: first, you can't let people know that you are not a eldest lady. Don't worry, Miao Sanniang will help you.

Two, you can't make Prince He unhappy, you have to follow his heart and his wishes.Don't worry, he is only a half-grown child, you are a smart man!If you do this, once the eldest lady comes back, you will have money and be able to marry your daughter-in-law. You can kill two birds with one stone.

But if you can't do it, or if you miss the trap, and Lingxi can't keep it, I'll kill you with my own hands! "

cut you...

The kitten thought of the fear at that time, and felt so far away.

"Are you asleep?" Little Leopard asked quietly.

"No!" The kitten yawned a little tired.

"It is said that the wedding was very big. Many unmarried men and women in the mountains went there, and the tits and I also went, but we met outside Dazhai on the way. There were people everywhere. At night, some people wrapped red paper with red paper. The pancakes and eggs were brought out, one egg and one pancake per person. In the morning, dozens of large pots boiled white rice porridge. I still remember the smell. Did you know that there was salt in it, and I don’t even know the smell now. forget!"

The little leopard was drooling while talking: "You are inside, eat better!"

"Well, the porridge is mixed with minced meat, and there are vegetables that look like flowers..." The kitten held his head, thinking about it was like a dream, but it was a pity that he was a bride in the dream.

"That night, we sang folk songs. We sang and sang all night! Then we started singing again the next day, as if we would never get tired. You said, how beautiful it is for one person to get married once like this! Isn't it?" Leopard is intoxicated.

"En." Kitten nodded unconsciously.

The wedding is beautiful, but the newlyweds are not real couples, the one who lives in the new house tonight is the real hostess!

The elders will no longer urge the "Miss" to have children!

"You don't like that wedding?" Little Leopard couldn't help asking when he saw that the kitten was silent.

"I like it..." the kitten thought, in this life he has not been so eye-catching, and he has been in a mess again!

When thinking of the wedding, the first thing Kitty thinks of is the few days before the wedding in Miao Sanniang's pharmacy.

The pharmacy was full of jars and jars, exuding a strong aroma of old wine, and the aroma of each jar was different.

He was spared by the headman, let out of the woodshed, and soaked in a pile of flowers and plants like pickles.It is said that in the last few days before marriage, I soaked for two hours a day.

Then he was laid naked on the "cutting board", and allowed to mix a pile of spices on his body, piling up a thick layer, and it took another half an hour, but it was not over yet.

For him, the little cat has become an out-and-out woman, from soaping, to shaving, hands, and pedicures... all the vellus hair has been shaved, not to mention a bald cat!

After repairing, it took a while to mix and dry...

Let the naked little bobcat lying on the bamboo building unconsciously think that the sauced meat before the Chinese New Year probably did the same thing——

Wash, pluck, salt, sauce...then when the time comes, it's ready to cook.

It's just that the green hills are left without worrying about no firewood. At that time, he thought, as long as he is alive, he must turn over and wipe it away!Put your heart on the side, leaning on the chopping board, with a look of letting others slaughter you and seeing death as your home - it's just...

When the wind blows, the witch doctor Miao Sanniang promises to the leader:

"Don't worry, headman, for the safety of our Lingxi, my Sanniang will risk her life and promise to let this local cat, in my hands, smooth and smooth, thinner than the red satin in the capital..."

He couldn't help being covered in cold sweat all over his back then, shivering!

It's ridiculous to think about it, the kitten put down his hand and touched his neck, the water is still slippery!Sanniang's secret technique is indeed terrifying!

"Are you sleepy?" Little Leopard asked with his head raised.

The kitten waved away the little leopard's fly head naturally, not daring to push Haoye, he waved the little leopard casually: "Don't get so close to me!"

"You are feminine!" Little Leopard laughed.

The kitten stood up vigilantly and pushed the little leopard away; "I think you're crazy about women!" But when he was about to get out of bed, he regretted it, he was already a man, so why make such a fuss.

Even Haoye.If I knew I was a man, I'm afraid I wouldn't even look at him...

"When you came back from Dazhai, why are you making such a fuss? You seem to have lost your nerve!"

Little Leopard lay down again. He likes kittens, but men and women are clearly distinguished.

"You think Dazhai is a place of gods!" The kitten lay down and said, "I worry every day that I won't be able to get out, and I will die inside." Especially that Haoye, who was young, didn't want to study hard, Hanging around him every day makes him hungry and sleepless, and he has to think about the things about having children every day.

To have children, his kitten can do it, and the rooster has laid eggs!Isn't this tormenting people!

"How scary?" Little Leopard stared.

"Maybe others are different from me! Little Leopard, don't ask me about things in Dazhai anymore!"

The kitten closed his eyes and didn't want to mention it. When he remembered that the old man wanted him to find a way to get the child, he became even angrier... child, child!His kitten is male, not to mention having children, even a bridal chamber is impossible!

Take a deep breath, there is no need to give birth now... The kitten is so comfortable...

I just feel bewitched, I must be bewitched, and I keep thinking about that little pervert Hao Ye.

"Good! We are good brothers!"

Little Leopard laughed, but after laughing, his heart sank suddenly. He seemed to have forgotten something very important.