[SSHP] End of life

"Harry, Harry!"

When Harry came to his senses, he saw that his fork was cutting a pie, which was now as disgusting as a plate of vomit.The main meal had disappeared, and all he had in front of him were desserts.He didn't even know how the meal got over it, but now it was over.

Beside him, Hermione was glaring at him.He blinked in confusion.

"Harry, what's the matter with you lately? I'm talking to you like I'm talking to a table or a wall—"

Harry looked towards the teacher's table.Snape was drinking from something in his cup, which he assumed was coffee, perhaps tea.He didn't know if Snape drank, but there was no doubt that alcohol would not be served at any of the tables during term time, and it seemed unlikely that Snape would drink milk or pumpkin juice.

Dumbledore was listening to Umbridge deliver what she presumably had to be a tirade about schooling, and the expression on the unknowing Toad|Toad's face was intense.Harry's gaze stayed on him for less than two seconds when he suddenly looked up at Harry and winked at him.

Harry was taken aback.But Dumbledore didn't say anything more to him, instead smiling and nodding at Umbridge nonchalantly.

Harry looked away.Most of the time, he felt that Dumbledore actually knew a lot of things.Dumbledore must have noticed the trio's interaction, and Harry guessed his wink was to encourage him to examine and be honest with himself.

Just at the end of the last conversation, Dumbledore told him not to worry too much, he can tell his friends what happened to him, after all, a lot of things happened to them too - it's not really a historical event big change.Thinking of that night now, Harry suddenly felt that his conversation with Dumbledore seemed to have happened a long time ago, and these busy months made him feel that he was out of time.

Hermione was still glaring at him.She even forgoes her all-time favorite blackberry pudding in order to keep the pressure on.Ron's eyes wandered to another plate of pudding, but finally he put down his fork, deciding to forego sweets for once and listen to Harry's explanation.

They care about him.

"Eat, eat," grumbled Harry, dragging a plate of pudding, "and then I thought we should go to the Black Lake. That's a long story... we'll have to talk."

But unfortunately, dinner time was over before Harry could eat the pudding.All the food disappeared out of thin air in an instant, and Harry's fork poked on the plate, making a harsh scratching sound.

Harry stared regretfully at the empty plate, his stomach telling him it was empty at the moment.Probably the pie he poked into jam and the pudding he ate only one bite of were the only two things he brought for dinner, but it was over before he ate it.They had to go to the kitchen and ask the elves for a small basket with a lid, so they could take enough food to go to the Black Lake.

They were sitting under a tree by the Black Lake, the Ravenclaw team practicing Quidditch in the distance, and there was no one else by the lake or on the lawn.Harry devoured the pie, and for an hour and a half he was dealing with Ron and Hermione's constant stream of questions, not a single second to eat, and the pie was cold.

He should insist on eating before talking to them about these things.Clouds blocked the moon, and a huge squid or octopus was floating on the water, playing with an aquatic plant on the lake with its tentacles.Hermione and Ron looked stiff, but he couldn't see the color of their faces clearly in the relatively dim light.He guessed Ron was blushing like every vein was exploding one by one.As he ate, he felt unapologetically sorry for Hermione and Ron's state of mind.

Harry finished his last mouthful of pudding and waited another ten minutes.Finally, a broken exclamation that seemed to be finally out of suffocation stumbled out of Hermione's mouth: "God! I can't believe you've been through so much, and we don't know anything!"

Ron didn't say a word, he looked very depressed.His tall, lanky frame seemed to be shrinking until he was a Grindyllow, his long, clumsy fingers curling around the grass on the ground.

After a while, he said, "I don't want to admit it, but I have to say... I'm acting like an idiot."

"I guess I'm not much better." Hermione replied immediately.Both Harry and Ron looked at her in surprise.

An owl hoots from the Forbidden Forest.The narration is different from the Pensieve, the language seems to have a magical power, which revives many of Harry's emotions.Every time he heard that cry in the dark forest during the last winter, he thought painfully of losing Hedwig, but now he was no longer in pain.Now, two years later, he realized for the first time that he had always been so grateful to his friends: grateful that they cared about him, scolded him, quarreled with him, might interfere with his freedom, might dismiss his decisions, but always accompanied him. by his side.Despite his refusal, they never let him fight alone.

"You're all fantastic, really. We wouldn't have survived so much danger if it wasn't for the three of us," said Harry.He spread his palms, and suddenly felt that it was difficult for him to express accurately: "Hermione, you have always been the smartest, and you have been protecting us during that time. Ron, too, I dare say that you showed that year We are all amazed at the talent of leadership. I never knew you had this talent before. During my lowest period, if you were not there, we might have been caught or lost confidence. You don't need to say goodbye I'm sorry, but I owe you an apology. You've put up with so much for me, and I've always limited myself to my own emotions. I shouldn't be asking you to hang around me, and I shouldn't be asking you to pay attention Guess all my thoughts down to every detail... I should be more frank—”

"No!" the two said in unison.Ron shut his mouth and turned away.

The three of them were silent for a while amidst the wind in the Forbidden Forest.When Hermione finally spoke, there was rare frustration in her voice: "It shouldn't be like this. If it wasn't for us—"

"No!" Harry retorted immediately, "Hermione, you saved me. If you hadn't slapped me at the end, I wouldn't have had the chance to do it again." He said, laughing sincerely, "None of you Fool, right? Who wants to leave a safe life and run away hungry? You see me as a brother, trust me, and always support me. I only see what you expect from me, but ignore the expectations The trust behind it - I didn't realize at the time that expectations were based on trust. I ended up being a little too whiny, too anxious...Ron, you're the one I'm most sorry for."

The clouds moved away from the moon and the light finally became brighter.Ron's face was as red as his hair.He opened his mouth and squeezed out a few words: "You are my friend."

Harry patted Ron on the shoulder.Ron was not good with words, and Harry understood everything he couldn't articulate.He hoped that this time he could do as well as Ron: don't hate anyone, endure pain, and be determined to do the right thing.Maybe there are still many injustices in the world, and maybe he needs to kill himself, but in front of responsibility, nothing matters.

"So that's the end of our conversation for today?" said Harry, eyeing the empty basket hopefully and considering the possibility of another trip to the kitchen.He had never intentionally concealed anything from his friend for so long before, and once he let go of the big burden in his heart that he had been deliberately ignoring all this time, now his stomach seemed to grow bigger again like his heart.

Hermione looked at Ron, as if she had finally made up her mind: "Harry, I don't know what to say... This may be a repetition of the past for you, but for us, it is getting through Life. You shouldn't be stuck in the past."

"No, no," said Ron, "sometimes you have to remember the past. I looked good when I destroyed the Horcruxes, didn't I, buddy?"

"Yes, a hundred times more handsome than when I caught the Snitch."

Ron grinned: "I still think it's a great pity that you quit the Quidditch team. But we'll have plenty of opportunities in the future. You're so talented at learning Charms, maybe you won't be studying with Snape next semester?" Speaking of Snape, his face twisted a bit, "Merlin's beard! I still can't accept that he's on our side."

"Learn to accept it, it's not that difficult." Harry smiled, "Besides, it doesn't mean he's fair because he's from our side, he'll still deduct points. Once you've made sure of that, you won't have the illusion that he's being nice to you —I guess what you really can't accept is this."

"Ron!" Hermione warned, "I told you a long time ago that you can't doubt Professor Snape. You doubted him for five years, but it turned out that you were wrong every time. Now you agree with me! You You can't hate him!"

"But Harry said he cut off Fred's ear," said Ron.Harry was sure he was deliberately contradicting Hermione.

"Ronald Weasley—"

"Don't call me that, Hermione!" said Ron, his voice trailing off a little by the end. "You're my girlfriend after all."

He finished, peeking a little nervously at Hermione's face.Hermione's face also turned red in an instant.She coughed very deliberately and said to Harry: "I also think it's a bit weird that he's on our side. I think we'll all have to digest the news...but you can't keep fighting him. Whatever he Whatever he does to you, I now believe that he is doing it for your own good."

"I know. He's still a jerk a lot of the time, but I don't hate him, no matter what he does to me, I can't hate him any more," Harry said, lying on his back in the grass, feeling a sense of relief , "When Sirius died, when Professor Dumbledore died, and when I heard the truth about my parents' death, many times I wondered why it wasn't Snape who died. He killed everyone around me Killed me and messed up my life. But I don't think so anymore."

"Then why have you been in a trance these days?" Ron asked suddenly sharply. "Surely you weren't planning to tell us this, were you? If Hermione hadn't asked you today, you wouldn't have planned to. Things started to go wrong when you came back, what did Snape do to you?"

"I thought I concealed it well." Harry rubbed his nose. "I started learning black arts from him that day. The bastard said he wanted to exercise my mental strength, and he taught me the Death Curse in the first class."

His memory goes back clearly to that night.After Voldemort's form rose from the ground, he instinctively took a step back.

"How did you do it?" he asked. "I never knew of any spells that could turn animals into people, except Animagus."

He thought for a moment, then turned to Snape in horror under Voldemort's red eyes. "You didn't really happen to catch Voldemort, did you?"

"Calm down, Potter, don't talk nonsense." Snape said angrily, he obviously failed to get any sense of accomplishment from Harry's surprise and ignorance, "It's just the superposition of two spells. If you only see one Form is too scared to stand still, and you can no longer be a special boy."

He pauses briefly. "Look, Potter," he said, raising his wand at Voldemort, articulate and slow, "one of the peculiarities of the Unforgivable Curse is that it doesn't care about gestures. It can't be silent, it's entirely spell-driven. Pay attention to my pronunciation, listen to every stress and syllable length - Avada Kedavra!"

Voldemort let out a shriek, a faint, rat-like sound.With its death, the spell was lifted.It fell to the ground without any marks on its body, without twitching, just simply not moving.

"Understand? Practice the spell on him now. Imagine him as your enemy instead of a mouse." Snape grabbed another white mouse, and Harry watched it transform into Voldemort in five seconds, "I might go find a Boggart if need be..."

Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath.Snape's explanation was concise and on point, and he himself trusted his judgment to a large extent - in fact, when he nodded, he didn't use much brain at all.

Although he foolishly promised Snape to start with the Death Curse, he really didn't expect to learn it today.He looked at the dead mouse and thought again of the spider that flew over Ron's head.It was the first time he had seen a killing curse since he could remember.In the following days, he saw this spell more frequently. The dazzling green light and chaotic loud noises were not as shocking as the first time he saw it. He thought he had gotten used to it.It was only now that he had to make up his mind to learn the spell before he really realized what he had promised Snape.Snape was watching him, waiting for him to start practicing.It was too late for him to regret it.

"Avada Kedavra!" he yelled.

A green light shot limply from the tip of his wand, the slender body shuddered, and the mouse Voldemort huddled, unscathed.

"The strength of a spell has nothing to do with its volume, Potter," said Snape.

Harry shivered, and replied, "But I can use the running alarm clock. If there are voices shouting death curses in all directions, it may cause some disturbance to the Death Eaters..."

"Don't talk nonsense!" Snape said sternly.

"You can think about it," Harry insisted.After talking about some irrelevant topics, he felt his courage come back a little.

He took another deep breath.

He cannot realize that this life is innocent.It's not a rat, it's Voldemort.Voldemort killed his parents, made the first half of his life utter misery, he killed Voldemort's Horcruxes, one of them was Tom Riddle, he wasn't that scary.He is not afraid of him, on the contrary he hates him.Parents, Sirius, Lupine, Snape died directly or indirectly because of him, he must die.Harry Potter's anger towards Voldemort is not just out of justice, because he is not only the boy in the prophecy, the savior, but also an Avenger.

"Avada Kedavra!" Harry said, taking another breath, at the same volume.

The mouse screamed, bleeding from its mouth and nose.But it still didn't die, it just became more frightened and cowering.

For a short, long time, no one spoke.Snape looked at him thoughtfully.Unlike the usual active hard practice, Snape didn't issue the next order, and Harry just stood there, motionless.

"Time is limited," Snape reminded. "I'm not the kind of teacher who counts to three for you every time, Potter."

Harry was taken aback by the unusual calm in the man's tone - he had expected Snape to reprimand him harshly for his inactivity.He passed his wand into his left hand and rubbed his palms on his trousers.Perhaps counting to three was an effective buffer for him, but he felt that it was more like a countdown to the next new torture.He didn't answer.

"Can't do it, Potter?" Snape said softly. "Don't want to learn?"

Harry shook his head, avoiding Snape's scrutiny.He hated admitting he couldn't do something, but he couldn't deny his inner resistance.Snape was right, it was indeed difficult for him to learn the Death Curse.

"I just want to do some mental work again..." he whispered.

"So until when are you going to build? Is this class over?" Snape raised his eyebrows contemptuously.

"Maybe until the decisive battle comes." Harry replied coldly.Snape's reaction angered him to a certain extent, he looked at the figure curled up on the carpet, and tried to convince himself that learning the Death Curse was for a greater good, but there was a high wall in his heart, and he couldn't get over it no matter what past.

"Very well," said Snape, "I wanted to use a relatively gentle teaching method, but it seems that this method is not suitable for you." He opened the cage roughly, and the spring of the cage door made a loud snap .Harry watched as Snape grabbed another little white mouse out of the cage and chanted viciously. An adult James Potter stood next to Voldemort huddled in a ball, looking terrified, dazed, and cowering.

That wouldn't be the look on James Potter's face.It's not James Potter, but next to it is Voldemort.The two human figures seemed to be extremely dazzling in the darkness, making his vision blurred.Rats, or people—he didn't think he knew what they were anymore.

"Out of body!" Snape said softly.Harry flinched and looked at Potter the mouse, but it was Voldemort the mouse who stood up.The blood dripping from its mouth and nose was terrifying and pathetic.It reached out and gouged the other mouse's left eye.

The mice trembled and screamed, and Harry knew he was screaming too.It's hard to tell who's screaming louder.Voldemort the mouse spread his pale fingers, and a blood-red eyeball rolled out of his hand and fell to the ground. James the mouse was shaking with pain, but he stood still on the ground. Snape pointed the tip of his wand at it, and it began to jump. A weird dance.

"No! Please, please stop!" Harry shrieked, "Why can't we practice Fuchsias or No Shadow first-"

"I told you, Potter!" Snape roared, his voice barely drowning out Harry's voice and the screams of the rats with great difficulty, "The Death Curse exercises your mental strength to the max! This is exactly what you lack! How much did you hate me the night Dumbledore died? After you know the consequences of Shenfeng Wuying, you can't even use Shenfeng Wuying!"

Jaime the Mouse dances more and more wildly.Blood was dripping from one of its eye sockets, and the blood was splashed everywhere, and even a drop of blood was thrown on Snape's face.Snape seemed oblivious to this, his wand raised, his black eyes icy as snow, staring intently into Harry's face.

"Potter, raise your wand! I hope you remember, I'm teaching you the Death Curse!"

"But that—"

"Look, use your imagination!" Snape roared. "This is the Dark Lord! If you fail to cast the spell, it will be James Potter!"

"But I can't—" Harry felt like he was going crazy, "Why did you have to make it like this—"

"Look at him, Potter, realize who he is!" Snape snarled. "Look at him! Think of what he did, and will do! He tortured your father, he gouged out his eyes, he might Do more - kill him, make him stop! Raise your wand, feel your resolve!"

"But it's just a mouse after all!"

"It's not a mouse, Potter! Don't take it for a mouse!" Snape growled even louder, and Harry took a step back, horrified to see the veins on Snape's temples. "Look at reality! Think about the past." Timeline! If you still don’t have the guts to go to the battlefield, if you still insist on your so-called benevolence, countless people will die for you!”

"So you dropped Snape, picked up your schoolbag and ran away?" Hermione asked.Harry was beside her, covering his face feebly.

"It's not such a good idea to run away." Ron sighed and shook his head. "But I can understand you. Why did he have to teach you the Death Curse? In this way? Snape is such a bastard."

"The way he taught me has always been such a jerk. I still don't know if the torture is just his interest or necessary...Maybe he thinks I can't learn without prodding me."

"Sorry, I didn't know you went through this," said Ron.

"I can't remember it if you don't ask," said Harry, musing over whether he should hate him. "I've had a hard time not having nightmares since yesterday."

"I'm as perceptive as I am sometimes, you can't expect me to be an asshole all the time," Ron said with a smirk, and then he straightened, "I think it would do you good to speak up."

"It's good," Harry admitted reluctantly, "but I doubt he'll teach me any more. He must think I'm a coward for running away from two mice."

"It's not your fault, Harry," said Ron, "after all, those two mice have the shape to trick your eyes."

Harry shifted his body on the grass, and he finally found an ally: "To be honest, I was confused in the end. I didn't know whether to regard them as mice or people, and Snape seemed to think I had to treat them as people." Only by seeing them can I exercise my mental strength more effectively, but I find it more difficult to see them as mice..."

"But how can the Death Curse be learned in this way? I thought it should be like this - when you really face him, the power will come to the body by itself." Ron said.

"Maybe... I can't be sure. Last time I thought I hated Bellatrix very much, but when I cast a spell on her, she was hardly affected." Ron's reassurance was very useful, but haha Leigh's rationality made him agree with only a part, "After so many things, if I face the Death Eaters again, a momentary explosion may allow me to succeed, but this state is not sustainable, it is very unstable. Nep wants to train me to maintain this strength. But it's really hard..." He said, feeling uncontrollably discouraged.

"Forget it. It's not your fault," said Ron, propping his chin, as if imagining himself learning the Death Curse, with a more distressed expression than Harry's. "You're strong enough. If it were me, Maybe I'll run away after the first spell."

"May I ask why, Harry?" said Hermione thoughtfully.

"what reason?"

"Why do you insist on getting a response from him?"

"What response? I didn't ask him to respond to my running away, I don't want to know how he responded—"

"No, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the topics you insist on talking to him about, about what he thinks of you and what he thinks of you trying to protect him," said Hermione. "You know He just doesn't admit that he wants to protect you, and you know he knows that you really want to reciprocate him, he must. Those two topics have become taboo between you, haven't they? But why do you insist? You feel insulted because he doesn't respond to your kindness? Why do you want him to say those things?"

"What words?" Harry froze for a moment, he had never thought about this question before, "I don't know either. Aren't we discussing my escape from Snape's class?"

"Then you don't even think about it," said Hermione, her expression showing that she was desperate for Harry. "Take your lessons and listen to him. If he decides to treat you like this, then you believe it must be necessary. "

The author has something to say: Note: git, idiot, useless person.

These chapters are really hard work.I will talk about the death curse tomorrow... I will not break my promise... Saturday will definitely start the SS relationship line.

I'm sorry, I don't know why SS asked Erha to practice the death curse on humanoid rats.How did his brain circuit jump to thinking that let Erha take the mouse as a real person, and then Erha can really treat the mouse as a human to kill so as to exercise his mental energy. How did Erha get so confused that if he cast a spell, he would think that the mouse is innocent The rat won't let him cast the spell and he thinks it's Jaime, and I don't know.Is the mouse a substitute for the Boggart?Maybe I just don't like James.shrug.

Erha collapsed a little quickly, right? Laughing.He was at an impasse, caused by preconceived ideas.Did you realize it?

There may be more problems in this area. In the next few days, I will try to be more careful and cautious, and try to get them all back.If I haven't come back after the update on Friday, it may be that my IQ is not enough and I won't be able to come back... Welcome to Paizan at that time.