Su Wei

After finishing everything and returning home, both of them were a little tired.

After taking a bath one after another, Su Wei and Da Huang nestled on the sofa and watched TV to relax their nerves.

Da Huang leaned on Su Wei's shoulder, Su Wei's eyes were fixed on the TV, and Da Huang's eyes were fixed on Su Wei.

After a while, Su Wei asked calmly, "Does it look good?"

Rhubarb's eyes were full of tenderness, and he gave a soft "hmm".

Su Wei sighed softly, turned his face, and met his gaze.

Rhubarb looked obsessively at Su Wei's uneven eyebrows, slightly long eyes, and brown tear mole, and his heart was about to melt. He wished he could look at this face all the time, as if he would have an appetite when he ate like this, and he would sleep even when he slept. It will be more fragrant.

Su Wei kissed him lightly, and Da Huang couldn't help but put his arms around his neck, not daring to take the initiative to deepen the kiss, but also reluctant to let go.

After a while, Su Wei stepped back a little, with a very shallow smile on the corner of his mouth: "Your heart beats so loudly."

Da Huang was slightly taken aback, trying to see if he really smiled, but Su Wei had already turned his head away.

Rhubarb rested his chin on Su Wei's shoulder, and pushed his hairy head straight into the hollow of his neck: "Doctor, what does he look like?"

Su Wei glanced at Gao Jin who was standing aside, and found that he was too blurred to see his face clearly.Now Gao Jin hasn't yelled for a long time, most of the time he is quiet, and even keeps some distance from Su Wei.Sometimes he would suddenly lean over and say something earnestly. As long as Su Wei made up his mind to ignore him, Gao Jin would fall silent again after a while.

He replied: "Very young... young like you. Wearing a pair of black-rimmed glasses, very handsome."

Da Huang asked, "Doctor, how old are you?"

Su Wei said, "27."

Da Huang said: "That's very young! When I am 90 years old, the doctor will be 99 years old. When I am 90 years old, the doctor will be 99 years old. In fact, it is about the same."

Su Wei couldn't help squinting at him, but Rhubarb had a serious face.

Su Wei wanted to bury him, but for some reason, a sentence popped up in his mind - "We will grow old, but he will always be 17 years old." Because of this sentence, his heart twitched violently , Pain slightly changed his face.

Da Huang didn't notice his strangeness, and continued: "Doctor, where is he now? On the sofa? By the TV?"

Su Wei pointed to the balcony: "It's over there." However, he glanced there, feeling that Gao Jin's outline seemed a little clearer than it was a few minutes ago.

Although Rhubarb couldn't see Gao Jin, he was still a little ashamed—after all, he was someone the doctor liked, and strictly speaking, it should be the doctor's first love.In the doctor's world, kissing and making out with oneself are all carried out in front of that person.Thinking of this level, Da Huang couldn't help but feel a little proud, as if he had really defeated someone.

After a while, Su Wei got up and went to the cabinet to look for nail clippers. When he opened the drawer, a red box was placed on the outermost side - that was the condom that Rhubarb bought a few days ago.

Su Wei stared at the box of Durex in a daze for a while, Da Huang suddenly remembered this, and rushed over, but when he arrived, he didn't know what to do - take it?Pretend not to see and take out the nail scissors for Su Wei?Close the drawer?In short, the atmosphere is awkward.

Su Wei took out the condom and lubricant, and with the accompaniment of rhubarb's beating heartbeat, he said unhurriedly, "Let's have sex."

Soon, the two of them rolled onto the bed in their naked clothes.

Su Wei caressed and kissed Rhubarb, but he hesitated in every movement, as if he had to make up his mind to do it.Although Rhubarb felt a little awkward, he could understand the contradiction in Su Wei's heart.He tried to tease Su Wei, but Su Wei held his hands down.

"Don't touch me, let me take the lead, okay?"

Rhubarb felt a little aggrieved, after all, he was also a man, and the way he was only allowed to bear and not take the initiative made him feel uncomfortable.But considering Su Wei's psychological problems, he still tried his best to cooperate.

Su Wei fiddled with it for a while, and finally had a reaction, but just after putting on the condom, he became weak again.

Rhubarb couldn't help complaining with some resentment: "Oh, dear doctor, if you can't do it, you might as well just lie down and enjoy it."

Su Wei lowered his head and did not respond.

After a few seconds, Da Huang sensed that something was wrong with Su Wei, and rushed forward to hug him, only to realize that his whole body was shaking slightly.

Da Huang panicked immediately, and quickly comforted him: "I'm sorry doctor, I was joking..."

When Su Wei raised his head again, Da Huang noticed that his eye circles were a little red.

Su Wei whispered: "I'm sorry, I'm afraid I still can't..."

Da Huang shook his head again and again: "No, it doesn't matter, as long as I can be with you, I am already satisfied."

Su Wei closed his eyes sadly.

In the evening, Rhubarb warmed up a glass of milk for Su Wei, and the two lay down on the bed side by side.

After about 5 minutes, Rhubarb turned over and arched into Su Wei's arms.

Su Wei stroked his hair, feeling his uneasiness transmitted to himself along the tips of his hair.

"what happened?"

Da Huang's voice sounded muffled: "Doctor, I'm very scared..."

In fact, he didn't want to show uneasy and sad emotions in front of Su Wei, because emotions are contagious.But he could hardly control himself. If he didn't say it, it would be difficult for him to digest it by himself.

Su Wei sighed lightly.

Rhubarb could also feel the struggle from the bottom of Su Wei's heart.He clearly remembered the five-year agreement he said, and Su Wei also remembered it, but the two of them chose to forget it tacitly, because neither of them wanted to wait that long—how many five years are there in life?Five years is too long.

Da Huang clutched the hem of his pajamas and said in a muffled voice, "Doctor, you want to be with me, right?"

Su Wei kissed his forehead, and Da Huang insisted stubbornly: "I want to hear it from you."

Su Wei could only say: "Yes."

"Even if I am your mental patient, even if one day I will forget you, even if you will lose your qualifications to be a psychiatrist, are you still willing?"

Su Wei grabbed the slightly trembling boy by the back collar, pulled him out of his arms, and looked into his eyes seriously: "So what about the patient, I like men, I'm gay, and there are so many deviant things like this." One thing?——I am not a qualified psychologist, so if I don’t do it, I won’t do it.”

After a pause, Su Wei asked softly to the boy who was holding his mouth and was about to cry: "I'm afraid my mental illness is more serious than yours. Will you despise me?"

Da Huang hugged him tightly: "No, no! Su Wei, I love you!"

Gao Jin, who was standing by the bed, closed her eyes and sighed lightly, her lightness was almost melted away by this breath.The outline of his figure has been blurred to the point of blending with the surrounding environment, leaving only a faint shadow.

Su Wei stroked Rhubarb's back, a little resigned to his fate, a little crazy, and even desperately thought: Then let's destroy together!Even if he is destroyed, he must be with him, no matter what, he will never be alone again.

A selfish thought was growing crazily in his heart—he hoped that the boy in his arms would always be his rhubarb, and never change into Lu Xiao again!Lin Yinran loves him, Yang Shaojun loves him, and even his older brothers and younger brothers love him, but no one is as unreserved as Da Huang, because Da Huang has no way out.In the world of "Rhubarb", there are only doctors, no family ties, no need to care about other people's strange eyes, and only live for him.

This thought made Su Wei feel excited, but also a little scared.He didn't dare to think anymore, closed his eyes, and told himself to fall asleep quickly.

Unlike the previous few days, Su Weiguo really fell asleep very quickly.

However, when he was drowsy, he felt his soul leave his body.

He walked to the bed and watched helplessly that his body was still lying on the bed.The teenager beside him was sleeping peacefully, with his head resting in his arms, and his hands clasped tightly around his waist, as if he was afraid that he would leave.

Su Wei looked at all this with a frown, and stretched out his hand to touch Da Huang's face, but his hand went through his body.He panicked and lay down on the bed again, wanting to return to his body, but he couldn't.

"Su Wei." Gao Jin came out from the dark corner.There was no light in the room, and it should be dark, but Su Wei felt that Gao Jin's face was clearer than ever.

"Su Wei." He called again, with an expression of indelible sadness: "I'm leaving."

Su Wei slowly sat up from the bed, giving up the idea of ​​returning his soul to his body.

Gao Jin said, "But I can't bear it..."

Su Wei's heart ached like it was being torn apart.He kept repeating: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

Gao Jin raised his hand slowly, Su Wei seemed to be manipulated by some thread, he couldn't help leaning forward, and pressed his face against his palm.That's the real sense of touch, the cold, somewhat rough palm lines.

Gao Jin said, "You just want to find someone to accompany you, why bother dragging him into the water."

Su Wei turned his head and looked at Rhubarb lying on the bed. Rhubarb seemed to have a sense, and gently rubbed his face against the chest of that body.

Gao Jin said, "Don't hurt him..."

Su Wei felt the coolness on his face, raised his hand to touch it, and there were tears.

Gao Jin gently wiped away his tears: "I will accompany you, okay? I will never betray you, why bother to drive me away, I will accompany you for the rest of my life... Let Rhubarb go."

Su Wei shook his head: "But you are me."

Gao Jin smiled softly: "If you don't want me to go, I will never leave you. Rhubarb is a real person, he always wants to meet and associate with other people, and I only belong to You are alone, only you can see me, only you can touch me, and I will always only exist in your consciousness."

It's an alluring promise.Su Wei's heart began to waver, but he shook his head in vain: "No...you can't..."

Gao Jin did not suddenly become fierce when he refused as before, but was still gentle: "Why is it not good?"

Su Wei felt at a loss: Yes, what went wrong?

"When I am 90 years old, the doctor will be 99 years old. When I am 90 years old, the doctor will be 99 years old..."

Da Huang's words suddenly sounded in his mind, making him startled, and he took a step back abruptly.

"When I was 17, you were 17... When I was 27, you were still 17... When I was 97... You will always be 17..." Su Wei shook his head desperately, tears streaming down his face In the neck: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you will always be 17 years old..."

A huge suction sucked him back into his body.He opened his eyes again, and raised his hand to block the glare of the light.

Da Huang cried out in a crying voice: "Doctor, don't scare me, wake up quickly."

Su Wei slowly got used to the light, opened his eyes, and raised his hand to stroke Da Huang's hair.

Rhubarb fell limply on him as if all the strength had been pulled from his body: "Woo...doctor, you just kept crying and repeating 'why are you always only 17 years old'...I'm so scared..."

Su Wei got up and took out a board of psychoactive drugs from the drawer.This time Rhubarb didn't stop him, and even poured him a glass of water and medicine.

Su Wei took the medicine, panted by the bed for a long time, and said, "He said he was leaving and wanted me to go with him..."

Da Huang covered his face sadly: "Doctor, your guilt almost killed you."