Sea King's Self-cultivation

Since his 14th birthday, Tsunayoshi Sawada has always dreamed of someone.

The location of the first dream was in the boulevard of Bingsheng Middle School. He was surrounded by several senior boys in the corner, punched and kicked, sarcastically speaking.Some students who passed by were afraid of being retaliated by the senior boys and left in a hurry, some had nothing to do with themselves, and some dared not speak out, and gave him sympathetic eyes, but even stepped forward to say something. I dare not speak.

This level of bullying is already commonplace for Sawada Tsunayoshi. His father is not at home all year round, and his mother has always been simple and weak. He would confide a thing or two to his mother, and whenever he was asked about the injuries on his face and body, he could only put on the same cheerful smile as usual, and answer that he accidentally fell and injured himself.

Sawada Tsunayoshi has never resented his classmates for turning a blind eye to him because of campus violence or for helping him. If he doesn't have the courage to resist, how can he expect others to help him?

But what happened in the dream was completely different from before.

"Hey! You are going too far! How can you bully your classmates because of your own numbers?! I have already called the school security office. If you don't want to be invited by your parents, I advise you to stop!"

who is talking?

Who...is helping him?

"Are you okay?" The visitor squatted down and handed him a handkerchief, "Wipe your face."

Sawada Tsunayoshi was slightly taken aback.

It was just an ordinary square white handkerchief, which could be seen everywhere. It didn't even have a logo, and it still had the residual warmth of a girl's fingertips.

But this is the first time he... felt the kindness of someone other than his parents and elders so directly.

Even though it's just a small, insignificant handkerchief.

But it also made his eye sockets slightly hot.

He raised his head, but the appearance of the girl in front of him seemed to be covered with a layer of tulle, vague and ambiguous, and he tried his best to see what she looked like, let alone remember her appearance.

Even her voice was indistinct.

After that, he often dreamed about that girl.

He dreamed that they had become good friends.

They participated in the fireworks display together, and he gave her the white butterfly hairpin that he had carefully selected for a long time.She happily accepted it, and immediately pinned it to her right temple. When she was walking, the butterfly wings fluttered gently in the wind, ready to fly.

They sat on the grass watching fireflies together on a midsummer night, and talked about what constellations were flashing in the night sky at this moment. The train passed by on the rails. She took his wrist and ran, chasing the train that the wilderness could not catch up with. Night Breeze Blowing through the sleeves of clothes, a series of ginkgo leaves were brought up.

The contents of the dreams are not all pleasant. He often dreams about his near-death scene. The pain is too real, as if he has experienced it himself.At the end of his life, he would always hear her voice, and the hand that firmly held him——

"I will save you...I will definitely save you!!!"

He tried his best to keep his eyes open, trying to see her appearance and hear her voice clearly, but it was all in vain.Fear arises in his heart, people can't control their dreams, although now he can see her in his dreams every day, but if she disappears one day...whether he can't dream of her anymore?

The dream is always jumping and blurry, he can't remember how many times he died in the dream, and he doesn't know why he died, what he experienced in it - after countless deaths, he heard her low and sad voice: "I'm sorry... ...Maybe I still can't save you...This may be the last time..."

Sawada Tsunayoshi wanted to say that he didn't care whether he could survive, or even whether she could save him in the end, and all his thoughts were attracted by her last words.

What is "the last time"?

The last time...does it mean the last meeting?

After this, he will never dream of her again, will he?

The hour hand ticked around and around, the train arrived at the destination in an instant, the lights of the fireflies went out, and the turquoise ginkgo leaves swayed and fell... Everything in the dream was passing fast, like time that could not be recovered.

Only she remained where she was.

He ran back desperately on the trajectory of fate that never turned back, trying to outrun time and return to the origin.

"who are you?"

"What's your name?"

"Can we meet again?"

"Can we...see you again?"

The dream ends here.

He never saw her again—the girl whose name, face, and voice could not be heard clearly.

The girl who had been with him for many years.

Until... that familiar handkerchief was handed to him, a concerned voice sounded in his ears: "Are you all right? Wipe your face."

This time, he finally heard her voice clearly.

The body responded one step ahead of the brain, and he clenched her hand tightly reflexively, and said eagerly, "What's your name?"

The girl seemed to be frightened by his reaction, she was taken aback for a moment, and then replied: "Kyoko Sasakawa. My name is Kyoko Sasakawa."

He finally found the girl who appeared in his dream.

Her name is Kyoko Sasakawa, just like in the dream, she is beautiful, kind and lovely, sincere to people, excellent staff, everyone likes her very much.

Compared with her dream, she seemed to be more shy and shy, but they still became friends smoothly.

He gave her a white butterfly hairpin at the fireworks display.

He told her about the constellations on the grass where the fireflies were flying, and led her to chase the train that she was destined to miss.

Ginkgo leaves swirled past them, light and unrestrained, without nostalgia.

happy?

Happy.

Satisfied?

Satisfy.

The girl he likes and the girl he admires are by his side, shouldn't he be happy, shouldn't he be satisfied?

But what about other than that?

Since meeting Kyoko Sasakawa in reality, he has less and less recalled Kyoko Sasakawa in his dreams, but every night when people are quiet, the loneliness that grows deep in his heart cannot be explained... What is it?

He couldn't find the source of this feeling, just like he couldn't catch a kite with a broken string.

If nothing happened later, maybe he and Kyoko Sasakawa would eventually get together, marry the goddess in his heart, and grow old hand in hand for the rest of his life.

But not long after, a transfer student came from Bingsheng Middle School.

The transfer student's name is Shimizu Xing. She is really a very familiar girl. She was full of energy and expressed her desire to be friends with him on the first day we met.Such sudden enthusiasm caught him off guard, followed by wordless resistance.

But Kyoko has always been a soft-hearted and kind girl, and she accepted her immediately.So after that, they often travel and play together, laughing and having dinner together.

Sawada Tsunayoshi doesn't want to be with her.

He didn't even want to have any contact with Shimizu Xing.

He initially thought he was bothered by Shimizu-Anna's sudden intrusion, which turned what was supposed to be a twosome into an awkward threesome.But it didn't take long for him to realize...it didn't seem to be the case.

not like this.

When they walked beside him at the same time, he couldn't help but focus on Shimizu Xing. He subconsciously wanted to continue when he heard her speak, and he couldn't help but want to smile when he saw her smile. When the three of them were submerged in the crowd, his first reaction was always to look for her figure first, and when he found her, he wanted to hold her.

Realizing this, Tsunayoshi Sawada was stunned.

why?

The person he likes is obviously Kyoko, why does he pay so much attention to Shimizu Xing?

Well, in all fairness, she is indeed extremely beautiful. She is the beauty who can separate the votes from No.2 in the school beauty selection. She is also cheerful and kind, funny and lively, like a little sun that is always bright and bright.

Are there any boys who don't like her?

There will be no boys who don't like her.

But it is clear that Tsunayoshi Sawada should not be included here.

Can a guy like two girls at the same time?He couldn't believe that he was so superficial that he could easily move on with his appearance and character?

If this is the case, then what is the Kyoko in his dream, the girl who made him fall in love at first?

He doesn't want to be that kind of man.

He gradually alienated Shimizu Xing, and when the three of them were together, he always forced himself to focus more on Kyoko, forced himself to actively respond to Kyoko's every word, and prioritized her feelings and thoughts.

But what frustrates him so much is... He is still attracted to Shimizu Xing even though he tried his best to suppress it.

It shouldn't be like this.

It shouldn't be like this.

If he could forget the girl in his dream in such a short period of time, and fall in love with Qingshui Xing just because of her beauty, how ridiculous would all this be?

He doesn't like her.

Of course he wouldn't like her.

Time passed day after day, and soon after, Tsunayoshi Sawada had no time to think about these issues.

His mother, Nana Sawada, was brutally killed at home, but he managed to survive because of attending Shimizu Xing's birthday party.

The entire six years after that were like a movie to Sawada Tsunayoshi. He sat off the screen and watched the protagonist carry out his revenge plan step by step according to the planned route.He killed a lot of people, including many innocent people who were affected. He learned to play tricks and tricks. These methods are dirty, but if he can't play tricks and tricks, he will be played to death by plots and tricks. He stepped on mountains of corpses and seas of blood, Facing the bloody storm and stepping on the throne of the godfather of the mafia, he became an uncompromising person in the world.

Everyone fears him, everyone envies him.

Many times, when Tsunayoshi Sawada holds red wine and talks about the division of interests with various forces with a smile at the banquet... he will feel that he is divided into two people in a trance.

One is a well-dressed and calm mafia godfather.

One is a frail young man looking at the night sky in an attempt to find familiar constellations again.

Not to mention sad and tired, just a little bit tired.

Sometimes, looking at the young man in black with indifferent eyes and calm expression reflected in other people's pupils, he would not recognize that it was his own face in a trance.

Along the way, he lost a lot.

Innocence, kindness, weakness, sincerity... He paid a terrible price for these qualities he once possessed. He stripped them bloodily and threw them away as if healed his wounds, transforming himself into a completely different Tsunayoshi Sawada.

It is impossible to regret it, want revenge, want to climb to the top of power, how can "kindness and sincerity" be able to do it?

What's more, no matter how much you lose, whether it's a companion or a subordinate, at least—

Shimizu Xing was still by his side.

At least she was still by his side.

Let him not be completely blinded by the flames of hatred, and never turn back until he is destroyed on the road of eternal doom.

On the day the revenge successfully killed the enemy, he drank a lot and became unconscious. In a dangerous situation full of murderous intentions, he developed a character of extreme vigilance. Sudden danger, but this time, only this time, he didn't want to control himself anymore.

This sleep was very deep, and familiar figures kept appearing in his dreams, including dead enemies, companions who sacrificed all the way, teachers who taught him carefully, and mother Nana who smiled gently at him, the last picture It was fixed on Shimizu Xing.

When I woke up, the sky was light.

The morning in Sicily after the rain brings the saltiness of the sea breeze, the astringency of the grass and the fragrance of flowers and fruits, and the wind blows into the room in the pink-purple morning glow.

He sat up from the sofa, covered with an off-white woolen coat.

This is Shimizu Anko's clothes.

The young mafia godfather was slightly startled, and looked aside as if feeling something. The girl who had silently helped him deal with the documents all night was so sleepy that she fell asleep lying on the desk.

He looked at her quietly, with an unprecedented peace in his heart for six years.

It was as quiet as if everything had settled down.

There is no need to lie to yourself anymore.

he thinks.

"Fate" is a word that appears very frequently in literary works, with great depth and connotation, but it is not a good word, because its appearance often indicates that things are falling rapidly in an unexpected direction.

In order to save him, Qing Shui Xing blocked a shot and was seriously injured and unconscious, but he also let the opponent reveal the chassis left behind, but when he wiped out the last remaining forces, as if guided by a god, he discovered that thin file bag.

The moment he opened it, he felt that the boiling blood all over his body was frozen in an instant.

[Shimizu Xing, a member of the intelligence department, was dispatched to Japan six years ago to assist in the execution of the 'Miemen Plan'. 】

Just one line, 27 characters, a piece of thin paper, the amount of information that can be read at a glance... His eyes stayed on that line of black words for a long time, as if staring at it long enough, he could discover all of this. It's an illusion, a trick to deceive the eyes.

The world fell silent for an instant.

It was so quiet that I could hardly find the sound of my own breathing.

No, that doesn't mean anything.How could such an absurd accusation try to convince him in just 27 words that the girl who had been with him for six years had been deliberately arranged by his side from the very beginning?

He thought calmly, trying to find evidence from his memory to refute it, but the more he recalled, the suspicious things that had been ignored intentionally or unintentionally in the past seemed to spring up like mushrooms after rain.

Why was she so enthusiastic about him the first time she met, and she knew him so well that she wanted to be friends with him.

Why did she know him so well, as if she had investigated him countless times.

Why on the day of the incident, it happened to be her birthday party that made him escape.

Why... She would abandon everything and insist on following him to Italy to avenge him.

One or two, maybe coincidence and other excuses can be used to explain, but what if these problems are put together?

Is it a coincidence that you can still deceive yourself?

He didn't want to wrong her. While she was in a coma, he used various resources to review the events of the past six years, tortured the captured losers, and conducted an in-depth investigation of Qing Shuixing's identity... Seeking evidence from various sources , Everything in front of him in the end... seemed to be mocking his past six years of life, it was a complete joke.

Shocking documents and photos were scattered all over the place.

The young mafia godfather sat in the empty chief's office, like a cold and numb statue.

Looking at the photos and documents scattered all over the floor, he smiled softly. He was obviously smiling, but it seemed that he was in extreme pain.

Even you will betray me.

Even you will betray me!

... no, not right.

It's not even a betrayal.

The first approach to him was ulterior motives.

Everything was false from the very beginning, so how could it be considered a betrayal?

In fact, he should hate her, shouldn't he?

It's best not to wait for her to recover from her injuries, but to use the evidence to question why she lied to him and why she treated him like this. When he was deeply saddened by his mother's tragic death...how is she feeling?Are you laughing?Are you mocking?At the last moment, my mother was still thinking about getting her a cake... Did she ever feel even a little bit guilty?

How could she still stay by his side in the name of revenge?How could she still accept his marriage proposal with peace of mind?

Shimizu Xing, do you really have a heart?

Do you really have a heart?

But he hated himself more than hating her.

Everything could not be more clear, and there is no excuse to shirk it. Obviously, the accomplice who indirectly killed his mother should be arrested now, even if she was let off because of the false love in the past, the engagement should be dissolved immediately. She disappeared in front of her forever, didn't she?

His eyes stayed on the engagement diamond ring that had not been given away for a long time.

... She is still lying on the hospital bed.

She is still lying on the hospital bed.

Gunshot wound for saving him.

He lowered his head, buried his face in his hands, and laughed in a low voice, laughing so hard that tears almost came out.

He can't.

Yeah, he knew everything was fake, with ulterior motives, and calculations, but it didn't matter.

It's ok.

Because even if everything is false, quicksand between fingers...

That was all he had left.

He will never forgive her.

But he wouldn't let her leave him either.

On the day of the engagement banquet, many people came, but the faces of the male and female protagonists at the wedding banquet were more serious than the other, making the guests suspect that what they came to attend was not a wedding banquet, but a funeral.

Halfway through the engagement ceremony, the occasion for exchanging rings.

"When the engagement is over, it's really a foregone conclusion. Are you really happy to marry me?" she asked.

"What about you?" he asked her. "Are you happy?"

He didn't hear her answer.

At that time, Sawada Tsunayoshi didn't think that just after, not long after...he would never hear her answer.

When he killed the enemy, he uprooted and wiped out the remaining forces of the opponent. However, relying on the arrangement of the opponent for many years, he finally left a fish that slipped through the net.

The members of the undercover medical department successfully gained the trust of Peng Gelie's subordinates by relying on their connections over the years. On the night of the wedding banquet, he kidnapped the frail Kyoko Sasakawa and her newborn daughter without anyone knowing it. And secretly conveyed this message to Shimizu Xing, asking her to exchange for the safety of Kyoko's mother and daughter. If she dared to tell others, he would immediately kill Sasakawa Kyoko and detonate the bomb.

He set up a very ingenious small bomb device.

The bomb was not very powerful, it exploded just enough to shatter the heart of the nearest person.

Two bombs of the same type were installed on Shimizu Anko and Sasakawa Kyoko, and they have been activated. The only controller is in his hand, but the problem is... the controller can only stop one bomb.

Once you choose to stop a bomb, the countdown of the other bomb will instantly reset to zero and explode.

If you choose neither, both will die when the time comes.

When he heard the news, Tsunayoshi Sawada was very calm. With the emergency response that he has honed over the years, the more critical the situation is, the more calm the mind can help solve the situation.

"What do you want? Power? Wealth? Or save someone who was captured? I can agree to these conditions, and I can also guarantee that as long as you stop now, I will send you out of Italy and will never be held accountable. Kill who You can't even end it, so there's no need not to leave yourself a way out, isn't it?"

The voice of the other party came through the phone, mixed with the sound of electric current, and it was a little distorted: "As expected of the tenth generation of Peng Lie who was able to turn himself into a godfather in a desperate situation, you can still calm down and negotiate with me now... But You are wrong, I am different from those mobs who are loyal to the leader because of interests. We got together for our beliefs. When the leader died, the beliefs collapsed. What else do I want? What else can I do? What about the ones who are afraid? I have lived so far, and my only wish is to take revenge on you. I thought about it, how can I make you feel the same pain when you die only for a moment?"

"That's why I asked you this multiple-choice question, come on, choose a woman to survive." He said with a smile, "Now that things have happened, I only enjoy watching you suffer."

Sawada Tsunayoshi did not reply him immediately.

He was stalling for time, and during their conversation, he had sent his subordinates to the location of the kidnapping to rescue people.

But to control the time, don't make him suspicious.

He flipped through countless strategies in his mind, pinpointed the timing, and just opened his mouth when he heard a familiar voice from the other side of the phone: "...Gun Ji-jun?"

It's Shimizu apricot.

But how did she get the phone?No matter how fast the rescuers are, it will take at least 10 minutes to reach their destination. How long has it been?

She didn't wait for his reply, and immediately spoke again, as if she couldn't wait a second: "I just broke free from the rope when he was careless. Although I have average physical skills, it is still enough to deal with a medical logistician." Yes. He is no longer a threat. Jingzi is very weak and unconscious, but she is fine. I put her not far from the exit, so as to ensure that she will not be affected. When you come here... ah! found it……"

"What does it mean to ensure that you will not be affected?" He interrupted her almost roughly, "What are you looking for?"

There was a second of silence on the other side: "...Controller. The fastest bomb disposal expert will take 10 minutes to arrive, right? This idiot seems to have calculated this point, and the countdown is only 1 minute left. It's too late."

Almost instantly he guessed what she wanted to do, the blood was rushing through his veins, and his eyes were full of chaotic and complicated lines. He felt that he had never been so sober, sober and almost crazy: "Don't press! Qingshui Xing, you are not allowed to press!" !!!”

"I said, it's too late—"

"What is too late? How could it be too late?! Vengley's bomb disposal experts are the most experienced, ten seconds is enough! No, not ten seconds! Five seconds is enough! You stay there and don't move anything—"

"There are still 40 seconds." Xingxing interrupted him calmly, "Gangji-kun, I die, Kyoko lives or we both die, which of these two options should be chosen, normal people understand, I understand, I believe You must also understand. There is only this last bit of time left, are you sure you want to waste it on arguing with me?"

"No, I don't understand."

His voice was low and hoarse, rough as if it had been ground by gravel, and the smell of blood surged wantonly in his throat, as if he was about to cough up blood in the next second.

How could he understand?

How could he understand.

From a young and innocent boy to a thrilling young man, only she was by his side, six years, six years——

How many six years can a person have in his life?

She has seen his innocence and sincerity, his weakness and helplessness, his pain and despair, and his cruelty. She is the witness of his journey and knows him better than him. People have already become an indispensable part of "Sawada Tsunayoshi", and erasing her existence is tantamount to digging out his skeleton and flesh and blood.

He resisted her, hated her, hated her, and loved her—

Now, he can finally admit...

he loves her.

But she was going to die.

She is going to die.

Be it deceit, resentment, love, or hate, all of them will disappear with the disappearance of Qingshuixing.

everything is over.

everything is over.

If there is an epitaph written by God, it may be recorded on this page of Sawada Tsunayoshi——

He didn't die that night when he was 14, nor did he die when his body dissipated.

He died the day she died.