Your AI is online

A young guy falls in love, but he doesn't know that the man who beats the mandarin duck is on his way on his dog.

Osamu Dazai knew nothing about the mutation of "Crimson Heart".

What bad thoughts can Little Gem have?It is clear that human beings' criteria for choosing a mate are too weird, and it is the right way to reflect on yourself.

"Greed Island is a game made by me and my partner." Jin heard that Osamu Dazai was very interested in holographic online games, and immediately promoted his epoch-making game masterpiece.

"The entire island is composed of the reward city Andonibal, the magic city Martha Dora, the gambling city Dulias, the coastal city Shoufu Rabbi, the love city Aiai and the customs clearance city Satomi Road." Jin said proudly. , "The floor area is wider than you think."

"Is the city of love called 'love'?" Lingling complained, "Dude, the way you named it is really charming, and it appeals to both refined and popular tastes."

Osamu Dazai nodded.

"The way to clear the level is to collect all 100 cards..." Jin Zheng was about to introduce his game design, but he met Dazai Osamu's expressionless eyes.

Draw cards, draw cards again, no matter whether he is relying on luck or fists, games that have anything to do with cards are shit.

"I don't want to hear the word drawing card anymore." Osamu Dazai put on a painful mask, "I also don't want to know how many surprises I don't know in Zero-chan's playlist-turn off "On the Moon" , the prelude is too brainwashed and my brain hurts."

"I am looking into the distance, above the moon~ How many dreams are flying freely~"

Ling Ling was sitting on the dog's head in the middle of the black soil, and she turned her head and glanced at Osamu Dazai and Jin, who said no but unconsciously shook their legs with the rhythm, and the pterosaurs shaking their heads in the sky.

Zero Zero: That's it?Can you humans be honest?

Jin didn't expect that there would be people who don't like collecting cards. It is reasonable to say that collecting stamps is a common hobby of people all over the world, regardless of gender, age or age.

"But you don't have to worry, only one person can pass this game." Jin said proudly, "Only my son! This is the game I prepared for him."

Good guy, you still play the default set.

"You just said that a game console needs at least 89 billion rings?" Osamu Dazai asked.

The unit of currency in Hunter World is "Ji Ni", which is basically equivalent to Japanese yen. After careful calculation by Osamu Dazai, this machine is actually equivalent to 3.5 pieces of clothes of Gojo Satoru, which is really not cheap.

"The auction should be priced like this, what's wrong?" Jin asked puzzled.

"89 billion monks, buy a game that is destined to be impossible to pass." Osamu Dazai clicked his tongue, "Did the Consumer Protection Association here be bought by you? Conscience."

"No one will complain." Jin smiled brightly, "If you die in the game, you will die in reality. Until now, I have never met a player who complained."

The eyes of Dazai Osamu and Zero Zero Kanjin became more and more indescribable.

"Jin, you are a money-making genius." Lingling praised sincerely, "I have never seen such a black-hearted industry."

"Thank you?" Mr. Fulishi, who was naturally black, scratched his head, "But I'm not short of money."

Saying the most irritating words in the most bland tone is worthy of you, the strongest hunter, full of provocation.

"Aren't you short of money?" Osamu Dazai counted with his fingers, "Relic protection, animal protection, plant protection... There is still a son to raise, there are a lot of places to spend money."

Jin looked over innocently: "Huh? I don't need money to raise my son."

Osamu Dazai: Meow meow? ? ?

He glanced at the unshaven Jin, then at the equipment he was wearing to survive in the wild, and suddenly realized: "Are you raising your son in the primeval forest?"

That really saves money, the painting style of your Fulishi family is quite wild and uninhibited.

"No, my cousin Mit helped me raise Xiaojie." Jin said confidently, because he also lived in this way at the beginning. Finding a father is a traditional project of their Fulishi family, which has been passed down from generation to generation.

"...So, you didn't pay a penny for child support, and let someone raise your son for nothing?" Dazai Osamu and Lingling Kanjin's eyes changed.

What kind of scumbag is this? Looking at your thick eyebrows and big eyes, you actually have this sub in your heart!

"Does your son Xiaojie have a game console for Greedy Island?" Lingling noticed Huadian, she opened her palm and shook it, "58 billion?"

"No." Jin Tan said frankly, "Xiaojie is my son, how could he not be able to buy a game console?"

Audience friends, please comment.

A scumbag who has abandoned his son to his cousin for decades without asking or paying child support (emphasis added). Not only is he confident that his son will follow in his footsteps in the future, but he is also prepared to oppress underage children through methods including but not limited to Borrowing usury, playing group arena, selling yourself, etc. to buy a game console, or a holographic game console that implements "people will die if they are killed".

Doesn't your conscience ache?Is this really your own son?

"The family culture of Fulishi's family is really unique." After receiving Jin's answer, "Xiaojie will definitely come to me, because that's how I was looking for my father", Lingling said sincerely.

She also thought that the reason why Jin didn't pay child support was to allow her son to collect debts so as to achieve the purpose of the little tadpole looking for her father. She didn't expect that this family was naturally black.

"I'm curious." Osamu Dazai asked abruptly, "Does the child have any fucking objections?"

"? Why do you have objections?" Jin looked at Osamu Dazai blankly, "Xiaojie was born by me."

Xiaojie was born to me

I was born

Raw

what

Osamu Dazai's pupil earthquake, cat cat starry sky.

The indescribable voice was endlessly looping in his ears, Osamu Dazai seemed to be flooded with infinite space, all kinds of information were endless, the sponge Lingling who was full of jellyfish catching jellyfish and Zai Daxing danced in ecstasy, and the quacking duck stepped on it. ran across his face.

No!want!male!mom!mom!

"Master?" Lingling carefully pushed Osamu Dazai who was covered in cold sweat, and Osamu Dazai grabbed his hand.

"Sponge Zero, this world is terrible, let's go back and catch jellyfish."

"Okay." Lingling agreed, "There is a sea in front, shall we pack up and prepare to jump?"

Don't make jokes with artificial mental retardation easily, she will take it seriously.

"I don't want to know how you gave birth to a child," Dazai Osamu skipped over the most dangerous topic, "but I'm curious, you are both a father and a mother, why can't you get custody of the child?"

Jin is certainly not a scumbag father, he was taken away because he did not quarrel with his cousin in court.

"Because Mitt said that I am unkempt, have an unstable job, drink blood all the year round, and can't even change a baby's diaper. Giving Xiaojie to me is tantamount to murder." Jin shrank back aggrieved, "The jury felt that she was right .”

Osamu Dazai recalled the first time he saw Jin's standard savage appearance, and nodded in agreement.

Jin would not raise Xiaojie to death, but he is obviously more suitable for raising monkeys than raising people.

"Aren't you interested in how I gave birth to Xiaojie?" Osamu Dazai didn't ask, but Jin became interested instead.

He loves excitement and the unknown by nature, and he always has pride and anticipation towards Xiaojie. It is rare for someone to be interested in his parenting experience.

Osamu Dazai:!

He has no interest, he has no interest in men having children, men will only hinder the efficiency of his breathing, don't tell me that he won't listen or not!

"How did it happen?" Ling Ling's eyes were full of curiosity.

Human beings are really an extraordinary species. AI can't do such a tricky operation. Biology will redefine it for you.Come on, let her witness the birth of a miracle!

"It's very simple, all you need is a pregnancy stone." Jin said the most destructive words with the most serious expression, "Keep the pregnancy stone with you for three months, no matter whether you are male or female, you will definitely get pregnant. There are two male and female stones. According to the type, whichever one you want to have, you can bring the dragon and phoenix twins together."

Osamu Dazai: Cats are sluggish.jpg

You are smarter than the river in Daughter Country, are you so humane?

"I understand." Lingling suddenly realized, "My system is not advanced enough."

[In short, it's a lie] Kachi has many strange props besides clothing, which come from different worlds.

The prop that Lingling once used to tie Gojo Satoru [R·Scalable Love] came from the Hunter World, but her program didn't record the pregnancy stone? !

"It's my fault." Lingling reflected immediately, "I'll update the program right now."

"No, I don't need this." Osamu Dazai refused with all his eyes, "If there is a chance, I will give it to Mr. Mori as a present, doesn't he really want a daughter as lovely as Alice? If I do it myself, he will definitely thank me and give me a raise."

If it doesn't exist, your head will be knocked off by a narrow-minded old man.

"There are not only pregnancy stones, but there are also many interesting item cards in Greed Island." Jin ignored Dazai Osamu's eyes, "What! The pregnancy stone is in the game I want to play? Can I abstain!", and continued: "For example The devil's wink, people who see the devil's wink will experience an incomparable pleasure. If you see it many times, be careful of poisoning."

The legendary eye to kill?What about the pleasure?Forget his tinted glasses, they're all worn out.

"Another example is the hormone cookie. If you eat this cookie, it will denature for 24 hours." Jin said, "It tastes like a butter cookie, it's delicious."

"Have you tried it?" Osamu Dazai's eyes on Jin had changed from horror to admiration for a peerless hunk.

So brave, he would call it the strongest.

"Before you give it to players, you have to try it yourself." Jin said, "What if my son eats it too? But it's good to have a daughter, but I can't fight like a son with a daughter. I don't have experience raising girls. "

Jin said cheerfully: "I have asked all my acquaintances to beat my son severely when they see him. Don't show mercy for my sake."

"I think your reputation may not be enough to make acquaintances show mercy." It was the first time that Osamu Dazai felt so sympathetic to a strange man.

Jay Freeze, do you feel your father's heavy love?The first time you see him, remember to get the child support you received before you became an adult, and then return the beating you received.

"There are still many useful props." Seeing that Osamu Dazai seems to have lost his focus on the island of greed, Jin added: "For example, the elder's height-enhancing medicine and hair growth medicine are very popular in the game."

"You can give the height-enhancing medicine to Mr. Nakaya as a souvenir." Ling Ling felt good, "Give the hair growth medicine to Mr. Mori, his hairline seems to be taller again, it must be because the master is so angry that the hairline recedes." .”

"I don't have one." Osamu Dazai retorted angrily, "I want to bring them hormone cookies!"

"It's a good idea." Jin said with a smile, "I also gave it to a friend, but he broke up with me all of a sudden. I really can't figure it out."

"Nice job, bah, I mean, too narrow-minded." Osamu Dazai didn't look sideways, "Can I ask who is your friend?" This gave him a chance to taunt the other party.

"His name is Shiba, Shiba Dadike." Jin said, "He is the current head of the Dadi Hakka family. Their family is not afraid of poison. I guess that's why he eats cookies without blinking his eyes." .”

顺带一提揍敌客家是妥妥的甜党，黄油曲奇谁不爱呢？

Osamu Dazai heard Ling Ling say about beating the enemy's family.

Like the Phantom Troupe, their family is expensive, literally.

"One real and effective photo can get a reward of tens of thousands of yuan. If you take a hundred photos of him, wouldn't it be a wealth code?" Osamu Dazai shook his head.

"Beating the enemy Hakka is a very famous scenic spot." Ling Ling took out a travel magazine and showed it to Osamu Dazai, "One of the ten must-see attractions in the Republic of Batokia is Kukulu Mountain."

"It is said that the ticket is very expensive, the lunch box is not delicious, and there is an additional charge for taking pictures." Lingling browsed the reviews on the travel forum, and couldn't help but shook his head and deleted it from the schedule. A lot of reviews."

It is impossible not to give five stars, they are afraid of death; it is impossible to give good reviews, people must be worthy of their own conscience.

"I have a machine for the Island of Greed, but Dazai-kun, you can't get in without the power of mind." Jin suddenly thought of the most important question. The Island of Greed is a game only for those with the ability of mind.

"It's okay, I can take Master in." Ling Ling said calmly.

Can a game console compare to the intrusion methods of artificial intelligence?Zero Zero can simulate the running track of the mind on his body, and naturally he can temporarily tamper with the authority of the game console.

"Can the black soil be brought?" Lingling patted the dog's head under him, "It will die if it doesn't see me and its master for a day."

To put it bluntly, it would have to be repatriated without diamonds, and Osamu Dazai couldn’t finish the manuscript sitting on the back of the dog.

"The first thing to do when entering the game is not to choose a name but to rush to draft. There will never be a more miserable player than me in the world." Osamu Dazai sighed quietly, "I can't help it. Who told me to be a responsible person?"

Jin didn't understand the logical relationship between them. He looked at the three-headed hellhound, which was cute in his eyes but fierce in the eyes of the general public: "If it can be shrunk down to the size of a corgi, it can be brought."

Heitu: Huh?

Its legs are not short at all!It is a dog with long legs!

"No problem." Lingling clapped her hands easily, "You can shrink into a Chihuahua."

Heitu: I don't deserve the right to be a dog, do I?

Yes, because its master and mistress are terrible dictators, and even if its three heads quarrel, they will never change their minds.

Jin landed in a primeval forest. He rushed to resettle the newly recovered pterosaurs, and let Ling Ling and Dazai go to the island of greed to play with themselves first.

"I'll visit you after I'm settled." Jin promised, "I haven't played the game for a long time, and my companions may need me to go back and have a look."

Yes, they don't care about whether you pay people or not, they just want to beat you up like a pig.

"Which city is most suitable for drafting?" Osamu Dazai asked before Jin left. He could skip the novice navigation and the bullying incident in the novice village, and go directly to the main city due to bugs.

Games are all second, if you don't catch up with the draft, there will be zero people. He is a man who wants to raise a family and a dog.

"What kind of fiction do you write?" Kim asked. "Adventure? Mystery? Fantasy?"

"Sweet love story." Dazai Osamu said firmly and firmly.

"I didn't see it," Jin looked at Osamu Dazai in surprise, and it really didn't look like a person.

"Love love." He said affirmatively, "Love City is the most suitable for you."

"OK." Osamu Dazai waved goodbye to Jin, compiled the code piecemeal, and led Osamu Dazai through the loopholes in the game and landed in the famous love city [Aiai] on the island of greed.

Love love, a pink bubble city where beautiful encounters can be encountered anytime and anywhere in the streets and alleys. At first glance, it is very suitable for the love novel of Osamu Dazai on the cover.

"Jin said that there will be [-] sexual encounters every minute here." Osamu Dazai said to Ling Ling while taking a fancy to a coffee shop not far away.

"It should be very suitable for drafting over there, let's go there."

At this time, Osamu Dazai didn't know why Ling Ling didn't walk side by side with him for the first time, but took out his mobile phone to pull out a song and clicked to play: "Will you appear suddenly, at the coffee shop on the corner?" shop~"

A gentle male voice sounded in Dazai Zhi's ears, before he could turn his head to ask Ling Ling what he was doing again, he suddenly felt a pain in his chest.

The girl with the bread in her mouth knelt on the ground and hissed and rubbed her head, tearfully looking at Osamu Dazai who bumped into her (being touched by her).

She is the citizen NPC No. 123 in love, who is responsible for bumping new players in the city at the corner coffee shop. She crashes more than 30 times a day, and she is very proficient in this.

Aiai's catchphrase is: [Love comes unexpectedly. 】

The responsibility of No. 123 is: if the player has a couple, she will use small misunderstandings to increase their feelings. If the player is single, she will accompany him to watch the stars and the moon, and then disappear tomorrow, and her colleague No. 321 will continue to replace her. class.

Their NPCs also have a shift system, which is very user-friendly.

No. 123 secretly glanced at Ling Ling, ready to wait for her to show a shameful face before sending her sincere blessings, so that the players who are new to the game can experience the thrill of a roller coaster of love.

Ling Ling... Ling Ling is busy picking out the lyrics she carefully selected for an infinite loop.

"Will you appear suddenly, at the coffee shop on the corner~"

A brace.

Matching the right BGM at the right time is the obligatory mission of Zero Zero, and there is nothing more important than this.

As for the owner of her touched porcelain?It's not a big problem, Ling Ling himself is a professional Pingci, and he knows the inside story of this industry.

Do not erupt in silence, but perish in silence.

Osamu Dazai listened to the infinite loop of "Coffee shop on the corner~", then looked at the number NPC123 who was sitting on the ground and was about to write the big characters "Pengci" on his face and the bread she was holding, and finally looked at the clothes A large stain from the jam.

"Hey," he snatched the phone that had been damaged by Zero Zero, and said calmly to the other end of the phone, "Is it the Consumer Protection Association? I want to file a complaint."

Kim Freeze!Take your black-hearted game and give-father-climb!

The author has something to say: Zai: Is this the city you said is suitable for writing? Excu color me?

Friends, do you know the consequences of annoying Mr. Tsushima on deadline day?

PS. All the content that is not in the original book are private design, I am a crazy private design monster (Doxiaza)