Your AI is online

Gojo Gojo was so angry that he bit the candy in his mouth, and the candy wrapper crunched under his fingertips.

Osamu Dazai, who was opposite him, was still turning black and white, pouring dirty water on him with a glib tongue, and blah blah.

Tell him what's black is white, and what's white is what's black. In short, he can't hear a word of human beings.

The most annoyed thing was that the human-shaped curse spirit was still nodding like garlic, and almost took out a small notebook to write down and recite all the bad things Dazai Osamu said, with a deeply convinced expression on his face.

Osamu Dazai: "Look, Zero-chan, has he been staring at you with ill intentions? Facing this kind of shameless Stoka, you have to strike hard!"

Ling Ling: "Hmm!" Write it down.

There was a crowd of people in the crowd, and a white-haired man actually did such a thing to a young woman!Unforgivable!

"Cao, Jie, what did I do?" Gojo Wujo endured it and couldn't bear it anymore, and elbowed his "good brother" who abandoned him in the water and fire.

Xia Youjie had just coaxed Mimiko and Nanako to sleep. He glanced back at Gojo Satoru, who was depressed, and said objectively, "You tried to beat up innocent girls in the street without distinguishing between green and red and white and white."

Just for this point, the headlines of tomorrow's social news will definitely have Wutiaowu's name.

It is indeed the strongest in the world, and it is also the strongest in the rule of law channel.

"She's a curse spirit!" Wujo Wu's expression was indescribable, as if he suddenly found himself out of water after swallowing three cornbreads raw, "Isn't it a textbook standard operation for me to kill her?"

What did Wujo Satoru do wrong again? !

"You're racist." Osamu Dazai choked unceremoniously, "What's wrong with the curse spirit? Did the curse spirit eat your rice? Our zero sauce is pitiful, we can't even eat a warm crepe, you You still scold her while eating the candy she gave you, is your conscience okay?"

Gojo Satoru looked down at the candy wrappers piled up on the tatami in front of him, and then raised his head to meet the eyes of the girl with clear eyes.

Seeing him looking over, Ling Ling bent her eyes and smiled, the dull hair on her head dangling.

What a big white-haired cat, I want to rua!

Make him rua bald!

Osamu Dazai secretly glanced at Gojo Satoru's soft white hair, with a delicate mood.

Ling Ling has a special liking for Dazai Osamu's hair, since she has a body and rooted on his back, she likes to bury the tip of her nose on the top of Dazai Osamu's head whenever she has nothing to do.

Osamu Dazai has always been puzzled by her behavior. Logically, as an artificial intelligence, it is impossible for her to be enthusiastic about a certain behavior for no reason.

Until one day, Osamu Dazai saw a video of sucking cats with tens of thousands of rotations on his mobile phone.

In the video, the cat who was pushed on the ground and turned its belly out meowed loudly, but it couldn't stop the heavy love that the shit shovel officer sucked it up.

The case has been solved, and Osamu Dazai is not only her host in Ling Lingyan's eyes, but also her big brother, food-producing father and cute cat.

Osamu Dazai, an Oscar model worker who plays the four roles of master, pet, father, and son, did not get a penny of salary, which made people cry.

And now, there finally appeared a young man who could share joys and sorrows with him!

Looking at Gojo Satoru's eyes is so hot, so loving, so tolerant.

How could the kitten be wrong?Even if the sky and the earth are tense in the last second, they can turn enemies into friends and touch their claws in the next second.

"Master." Lingling tugged on Osamu Dazai's sleeve, and wrote two big characters "Want to raise" in his eyes.

Group to steal cats, are you coming?

Osamu Dazai's mood was a little complicated for a moment when he saw Lingling's anticipation and excitement, eager to take out the Poké Ball immediately.

On the one hand, he really wants to save his poor hair under Ling Ling's claws, and hand over the horrible consequences of possible baldness to the invincible Gojo Satoru.

On the other hand, he was a little upset, as if he smelled the smell of other wild cats on the shit shovel officer.

After some weighing, Osamu Dazai still felt that it was not right, it was wrong!

Tsk, where did the wild man try to join their harmonious family, but Zai Zai would not allow it.

Osamu Dazai pursed his lips, lowered his head and whispered in Lingling's ear.

His voice sounded extremely embarrassed: "Zero sauce, he has 25 yuan for a shirt, we can't afford it."

When two cats compete, one will lose favor. Even if Osamu Dazai risked being bald today, he would never allow Wujo Wufen to lose his favor!

If he doesn't steam steamed buns to fight for his breath, his man's dignity cannot be challenged.

A shirt is 25 yuan, how much is Dazai Osamu's handmade custom suit?

Ling Ling did some calculations and thought it was still affordable, but she took a look at Osamu Dazai's smiling face that concealed murderous intentions, and wisely gave up the idea of ​​raising another cat.

Why do two hot men make things difficult for each other.

This is the trouble of the parents of the second child, Lingling thought seriously, her anthropology foundation is not solid enough, this course is really broad and profound.

"Then I won't raise it." Ling Ling whispered, "He looks like he likes Yazi who sheds hair."

Although cats are good, shedding hair is not good.

Gojo Wu: Do you just treat Lao Tzu like a cat?Still shedding?Who are you insulting?

They are the strongest and will not be bald!If you say no, you won't!

Even if Teacher Saitama was standing here, Gojo Satoru would have to shout out loudly: He doesn't shed hair!

Xia Youjie: Brother, the moment you try to argue with them, you have already lost. (painful pat on the shoulder)

Only sand sculptures can defeat sand sculptures. Could it be that Gojo Satoru can't escape the fate of sculpture in the end?

This is really - well done!

Gojo Satoru raised his head and took a sip of a cup of tea, feeling normal as if he couldn't understand the thoughts of the two weirdos in front of him.

He drank tea and ate sugar, and it was time to talk about business.

"Jie, please explain to me first." Gojo Gojo's expression darkened, pointing at Osamu Dazai, "What's the matter with your ideal that sounds so wrong?"

When he laughed at the Empress Dowager, you who said that the mission of the strong is to protect the weak, when did you become like this?

Xia Youjie stared at the teacup he was holding tightly in his hand, and a small tea stem stood in the center of the teacup.

If the tea stems stand up, you will have good luck today.

The inexplicable courage made him suddenly relaxed a lot. Facing his best friend, Xia Youjie finally said what he had been holding back in his heart for a long time.

The evil ordinary people in the Riko Tennai incident, the ignorant human beings who abused the magician children in the remote wilderness, the dead Hui Yuanxiong, the disgusting K feeling when swallowing the magic spirit...

Xia Youjie is not Wujo Wu.His best friend stood at the top, overlooking everything in the world as normal, tolerant because all living beings are equal, so he didn't care about the difference between ordinary people and magicians.

——Left and right are just creatures living under his protection.

"Ordinary people's negative emotions will produce curse spirits, but conjurers won't. So I wonder if if we create a world without ordinary people, will death and parting never appear again." Xia Youjie's voice is very strong Low.

Osamu Dazai shrugged, not responding to his "purity theory".

What should be fought has already been fought, the personality modification punch is still cooling down, the next shot is the friendship breaking face punch, K move?

Wujo Wutiao listened to Xia Youjie first telling about his own mental journey, and then talking about the painful black history of being beaten up by him after meeting Osamu Dazai, and then all the way talking about how many sweaters he knitted for Quanpan Xingjiao piled up the warehouse , can only use the tragedy consumed by the gift-giving link of fan activities.

Gojo Satoru: Cat Starry Sky.jpg

Jie, is your experience during this time too exciting?

The same male high school student, the same innocent DK, why did he honestly work for the school, and you have turned into a boss?

You said that good brothers walked together all the way, but you swayed all the way on the rocket, leaving him alone and an eDonkey to walk the world.

Gojo Satoru probably understands the origins of Xia Youjie and Dazai Zhi. A simple summary is the story of an unreliable life mentor and a confused teenager who is forcibly interrupted halfway through the blackened progress bar.

Although Gojo Satoru feels that this incident reveals a strange message everywhere, but without Osamu Dazai and Ling Ling, Xia Youjie's massacre of the village and defection would have become a reality.

He and his best friend will be strangers in this regard.

"Okay, for Jie's sake." Wujo Wu muttered, and the [He] that had been condensed in his hand quietly dispersed.

Lingling's program accurately captured his movements, the main body in Dazai Osamu's phone bent down and touched Cerberus' dog's head, and the animal figure suspended in the air that no one but her could see slowly disappeared. .

"Are you still holding back?" Gojo Gojo turned his head, and the blue pupils under the sunglasses accurately met the black pupils of Zero Inorganic Matter.

"I don't understand what you're talking about!" Lingling said briskly, "Do you still want candy? I bought a lot."

The cunning girl hooked Osamu Dazai's neck, and happily sucked the pussy. She happily buried her face in Osamu Dazai's fluffy hair, and quietly made a "yeah" gesture.

Heh heh heh, she is a super multi-core top AI, this person dares to look down on her emergency handling program, stupid human being.

Lingling brushed away Osamu Dazai's broken hair with the tip of his nose, pressed his lips against his earlobe and said quietly: "Master, you don't want to eat that kind of red candy."

"What's wrong with the sugar?" Osamu Dazai asked with his lips, he knew Ling Ling could see it.

Lingling: "That brand is called Xiudou."

Gojo Satoru: "Pfft!"

Kekeke, grass (a plant), his teeth are going to be acidified.

"...So, Jie, are you working for Osamu Dazai now?" Gojo Satoru, holding his aching teeth, pushed through the fog and asked sharply.

"It can't be considered a part-time job." Xia Youjie hesitated, "Dream partner?"

No, Gojo Wu thought: I think you were sold and you helped count the money.

"That nonsense show "Into Science" is also part of the angel investment?" Gojo Satoru asked.

Only now did he know that Shuji Tsushima, the author of "The God's Bride" who made half of the conjurers cry into fools, was actually Osamu Dazai.

Obviously, the words in his pen are so delicate and moving, but in reality, how can a real person be beaten so much, disillusioned.

"Gojo-kun is so discerning." Osamu Dazai boasted, "Our program is pretty good, right?"

The rhythm is one after another, there is a lot of nonsense, and there is no urine point throughout the whole process. Different people can see different fun. By the way, reliable knowledge of Feng Shui has been popularized.

Isn't this more passionate than "Bo Ren Biography"?The neighbor's children were all crying.

"Not at all." Wujo Wu complained.

He now understood why the first-level curse spirit in the show crouched in the corner like a doormat, daring not to resist.

For a program group with super imaginary magic spirits in charge, it's hell to be able to pull out flowers at the first level.

People curse collusion, collusion.

Boasting and selling, smelly and shameless.

"Mr. Wujo, people must learn to see the essence through phenomena." Osamu Dazai's face was full of disappointment that "children can't be taught", ""Into Science" is not an ordinary program, but a program that can change the world great show."

"Take the super imaginary magic spirit as an example." Dazai Osamu held Lingling's wrist and waved it like a lucky cat, "Even though most people know that the legends are false, they still fear them , this terror will give birth to the curse spirit."

"The greatest fear of human beings comes from the unknown, the unknown of darkness, of confined spaces, of indescribable things."

Osamu Dazai casually held Lingling's fingers, letting her fingertips scratch across his pulse, leaving white scratches.

Like scars from sharks.

"Just as human beings are afraid of death, it is because of their ignorance of death." Osamu Dazai said with a smile, "I really like death. I only have one experience. No matter how you say it, it makes people look forward to it."

"Death?" Gojo Satoru looked up at the candlestick hanging in the Japanese room, thinking of the day when he was about to die, "Indeed, that's right."

"You understand very well," Osamu Dazai pinched Lingling's fingertips, and she protested with a small bite on the cheek.

"It hurts." The black-haired boy rubbed his cheeks and asked excitedly, "Have you tasted it?"

"Sweet." Lingling said with certainty, "It's the taste of honey muffins."

Sweeter than strawberry milk.

I really want to have another bite.

"Hey, don't be so arrogant in front of the magician." Gojo Satoru was dissatisfied with Dazai Osamu's behavior of ignoring people while talking, and he pointedly reminded: "Don't be so close to the magician, she is real. Will eat you, even with an odd pact between you."

Instinct is not something so easy to resist.

"Being eaten by Zero-chan and dying is also a good way to die." Osamu Dazai stretched lazily, "It's really heart-warming."

This person is so weird, Gojo Satoru doesn't really want to talk to Osamu Dazai.

"The unknown brings fear. I reluctantly agree with your point of view, so you made "Approaching Science" for the purpose of literacy?"

He is truly a conscientious, sincere and sincere life mentor, which is awe-inspiring.

"Bingo." Osamu Dazai snapped his fingers, and calmly treated Gojo Satoru's "You're out of your mind" gaze, "Don't believe me, Gojo-kun."

He tilted his head: "Do you not trust my eloquence, or my influence?"

When it comes to brainwashing, Osamu Dazai is a professional.

"Let's make a bet." Osamu Dazai put his hands together leisurely, his fingertips touching his chin loosely.

"After one month, the number of spell spirits in Japan will drop by 30%, and after half a year, it will reach 50%."

His expression was relaxed and determined, and he declared his victory before the game even started.

Gojo Satoru has never lost in his life, he is unruly and arrogant.

I am the only one in the sky and the world.

But today, he met a man who was as crazy as himself.

"What do you want to bet?" Wujou put his legs on the coffee table, Xia Youjie saw his unknowing excitement, and sighed tiredly.

Two large children got together, can you keep the buildings in Tokyo?

"What's the bet?" Osamu Dazai squeezed his chin and said to himself, "I don't lack anything... How about it, if Gojo-kun loses, you can come and do a free job for me, how about it?"

Dazai·Superior Black-hearted Capitalist·Ji: Hit workers, Modo Modo!

Work for nothing?Gojo Satoru glanced back at Xia Youjie, who was working for Dazai Osamu without pay, and the latter gave him a strange look of "what's the matter?"

Well, you Dazai, it’s not enough to cheat his good brother, but also to cheat him, is the young master of the Wutiao family used to work for you?

"It's a deal." Wujo Wutiao made a final decision, "If you lose, I want your curse spirit."

"Huh?" Ling Ling of the cue suddenly pointed at himself, confused, "Me?"

A good high school student, why is he acting like a human trafficker?

Uncle police, help, there are people buying and selling AI here!Even the artificial intelligence is not spared, boy, you are too hungry.

Hearing Gojo Satoru's words, Osamu Dazai paused imperceptibly.

His eyes were dim, as if covered with a layer of gray mist, and his iris-colored pupils looked over gloomyly.

Ling Ling keenly noticed that her master seemed to be not very happy. She raised her head and thought for two seconds, then stretched out her hand and scratched Osamu Dazai's chin.

Huluhulumao, be good, be good, don't be angry.

"Zero-chan, don't tease me by teasing me." Osamu Dazai said angrily, reached out to grab Ling Ling's troublesome hand, and gave Gojo Satoru a cold look.

He won't lose, but Wujo Gou stepped on the thunder too accurately, Dazai Osamu is not a good-tempered master, full of bad things, and he really wants to teach him a "profound" lesson.

Osamu Dazai was unhappy, but Gojo Satoru was happy.

He finally moved back to Yicheng, and looked at Lingling in a good mood: "If he loses, you will fight with me. I want to see your field."

As I said before, this fight is settled!

Facing the curse spirit, there is no need to talk about martial arts!

Dazai Osamu & Zero Zero: That's it?That's it?

It's just a fight, why did you express the temperament of a domineering president earlier?It made them think so crookedly!

Gojo Satoru: It is because you are full of yellow-color-thinking-thinking that you see everything is yellow (pointing)

"No problem." After being surprised, Ling Ling accepted Gojo Satoru's bet for Osamu Dazai without hesitation.

This little request she can satisfy him now, Ling Ling is ready to move.

It doesn't matter if you win the bet or not, she wants to beat Gojo Satoru into a pig's face!

The author has something to say: Ling Ling: Even if the opponent is a cat, you still have to strike hard!

Zai: I was the one who looked up to that primary school chicken (Dumbledore shook his head)