zombie log

When Bei Xinmiao returned to Xiao Zhengnan's house.There was no one there.

He stood outside the door thinking for a moment.Thinking that he didn't even have the key to Xiao Zhengnan's room.Feeling down again...

He thought of his basement.

He chose to walk back, observing those who were no different from him along the way.They were all busy on the road, rushing to their destination impatiently, no one was as leisurely as him.He stopped at a street corner and waited carefully for all the cars to pass before moving forward.At noon when the fog cleared, the sun shone directly on City A, and the happiness of being alive became obvious.

When he arrived at the residential area, he found that it was different from what he remembered. The dilapidated buildings in his memory turned out to be distinctive buildings painted in different colors.The moment he opened the basement door, he couldn't help taking a step back. The damp and cold feeling that came to him made him not want to go in at all.

As a zombie, he had spent long and lonely days and nights in this sunless hut, thinking about it now, it was like recalling a horror drama.

But he also realized the benefits of being a zombie before - he wouldn't be sad, and he didn't have any complicated feelings. The dead body wiped out his emotions.He has no heart-pounding pain, and of course he doesn't know what joy is.

Suddenly realized that he should be grateful and happy for being reborn.

He opened the only window.Letting a little wind and sunshine in, he packed up his things and left a note in the house for the landlord.He left without looking back.He can no longer live here.He thinks the first thing he has to learn is to be kind to himself.

In the previous, failed, and previous life, he didn't know the meaning of being kind.Thinking about it now, maybe he took things other than himself too seriously.Like a coward in a shell, just immersed in his grief.He was brooding over the pain that life had given him, unable to extricate himself.

And he never took a serious look at the boy in the mirror, that beautiful time that shouldn't be desecrated.

Or maybe he just wasn't lucky enough.Or his life was never favored.But those regrets and sorrows should not overwhelm him forever.Maybe he should just see them as something outside him that gets him lost, like a cloud around him.

Aside from these, he is still a complete self, never broken.

He carried a backpack with all his belongings on his back, took the bus for an hour, and found the little sister's house.

The little girl came downstairs cheerfully like a butterfly.To him, she was still that 16-year-old girl.I can't help but sigh, I have also experienced a difficult life, but now my little sister only has optimism and happiness in her body.Perhaps this attitude is the most correct.

"Second brother, you look better." The younger sister said, as if she knew everything. "The last time I saw you, you looked like a dead person. This time, you look like you have terminal cancer."

Bei Xinmiao was amused by her. "I want to take a bath with you and change my clothes. And... I want to leave my bag with you."

"You can live with me." The little girl led him upstairs without asking any further questions.

"I have a place to live."

"You have no place to live." My sister said firmly. "You're short of breath when you lie. I can see that."

"Well, I don't want to live with you."

"Is there anyone willing to take you in?"

Bei Xinmiao's mood was a little low again, "Am I a waste in your eyes?" Although she knew that the little girl was sharp-tongued and loved to joke.But if the joke hits the truth, it won't make people happy.

He avoided thinking about Xiao Zhengnan, his heart was wandering, and he had no sense of belonging at all.If he was going to seriously think about life, the two of them had little feasibility.

The phone has been out of power since yesterday. Before taking a shower, he put the phone in the living room to charge.I checked after taking a shower, but found that there was no text message or missed call.

Neither Xiao Zhengnan nor Tang Guan called.

He recalled whether he had said some unforgivable angry words when he left Xiao Zhengnan's house angrily.He was a little uneasy, thinking about whether he should take the initiative to apologize.

At that time, Chi Yang had caught up with him on the stairs.Just leave him a word. "Don't forget how you got here today."

He didn't forget it so quickly, but after he came back to life, everything changed.He began to feel problems in all areas of his life, stimulating and disturbing him.

He can no longer be like a zombie, with a dead heart and a single goal.He's more like aimless now.

He first unplugged Tang Guan's phone.

"Have you calmed down?" Tang Guan spoke on the phone before him. "It's scary when you get angry. It's the first time I've seen you, and I won't dare to mess with you again..." he said in a straight line. "I know I'm wrong, but I can't control it... If you don't like it, I won't do it again..." It was Tang Guan who apologized to him first.

Bei Xinmiao felt distressed. For the first time, he felt that he actually loved this boy so much. "Why do you apologize to me humbly?"

"Ah... haven't calmed down yet?" Tang Guan muttered.

……

Then he pulled Xiao Zhengnan's phone.And thought about it for a few minutes before that.

"I'm in a meeting." Xiao Zhengnan said calmly on the other end of the phone. "You turned it on at last? Where are you?"

Bei Xinmiao swallowed the apology she had prepared, and didn't want to say anything.

"You actually... Played with that woman with me?" He said in a very uncomfortable tone, and at the same time felt that he still couldn't let go. "When you were less than 17 years old?"

Xiao Zhengnan hung up the phone immediately.

Bei Xinmiao held the phone in a daze, thinking about the reason, was it because of a meeting?Within a minute, the bell rang again.

Xiao Zhengnan's voice came. "You also said that we were not even 17 years old at that time..."

"Are you saying that I should forgive? Is it okay to treat it as a child's prank? If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I would never believe that you would do it? Even if you are less than 17 years old, you shouldn't even There is no distinction between right and wrong!? Now tell me, did I read it wrong, is that really the case?"

Xiao Zhengnan was silent and did not argue, which showed that the matter was indeed what Bei Xinmiao thought.Bei Xinmiao was filled with anger.

"Why are you telling me this, why!" he growled. "You want me to know you're an asshole!"

"I used to think so myself." Xiao Zhengnan actually said that. "That can be regarded as the most incredible thing I have ever done... Looking back, my student days have always been called a veritable good student, how did I... want to do such a thing... But that night, I was really excited. I couldn't control the excitement. When Jasmine proposed to let me, I just..."

"Stop talking!" Bei Xinmiao could foresee what was going to happen next.

"Really don't listen anymore? Don't you want to know what your first time was like?" Xiao Zhengnan said with great interest, and the guilty tone he used to have disappeared, as if those feelings of guilt were just a fake.

Bei Xinmiao really wanted to tear him apart, but it's a pity that now he can only tear his hair in front of the phone.Xiao Zhengnan murmured: "However, this is also my first time... Didn't you ask me about my first time? Are you satisfied with this answer?"

"Bastard! You are with that woman...you are a real pervert!"

"If you want to know what happened, I will tell you in detail tonight. See you tonight." Xiao Zhengnan actually hung up the phone first.

Bei Xinmiao was so angry that she almost threw the phone out.

Why is he so angry?Didn't you want to forgive me?

But how can you really not mind at all?It's like rubbing sand into a glass of sweet milk.He would rather never know.

Thinking of those sweet moments with Xiao Zhengnan, the complex feeling became more intense, as if it was irritability, these restless emotions finally rushed to his body together.Let him start to swell.He gradually felt that he had to release it.

Just as he was about to return to the bathroom, the little girl walked over with some clothes in her arms.He had no choice but to hold back and put on the new clothes given by his younger sister.

"It's more energetic." The little girl praised him while straightening his collar. "How can such a handsome man be unlucky? You will definitely get better."

……

In the evening, when Xiao Zhengnan returned home, he looked around in front of the door, but he didn't see anyone, so he frowned suspiciously.

He almost confidently believed that Bei Xinmiao would definitely come.

It was almost midnight when his doorbell rang.

When he opened the door, he dodged hastily, but it didn't happen as he expected—no one rushed in frantically to attack him.

Bei Xinmiao outside the door looked at Xiao Zhengnan's funny behavior with a look of surprise.

Contemptuously said: "People who have done something wrong, the most afraid of someone knocking on the door in the middle of the night."

Xiao Zhengnan looked very happy, welcoming him in warmly and carefully.

Bei Xinmiao said calmly: "Don't think that I really care about those old things. I can regard you as important as Mount Tai, or as light as a monkey's hair. All I will come is to do you I just finished listening to the bad things. If there is no part of me in it, I have no interest at all..."

"Of course, of course." Xiao Zhengnan put his hand on Bei Xinmiao's waist. "Let's go to the bedroom and talk about..."

"Just say it here."

"But the computer and the USB flash drive are in the bedroom... It must be explained with pictures and texts to be vivid. Regarding the wonderful process of losing your virginity, you don't want to simply understand it in a casual way..."

Bei Xinmiao stared at him angrily, interrupted his words with a wave of her hand, and thoughtfully walked towards the previous pink bedroom.

When the computer was turned on, Bei Xinmiao gritted her teeth and asked calmly, "When you decided to do something like that...don't you feel guilty and disgusted?"

"I don't think so. Oh, I mean, it's probably not what you think it is. When she was going to be so bold as to do that... I woke up instead. I know this kind of thing can't make it happen. I can't let a Girl and a guy doing that in front of me. I stopped her and told her to leave, telling her the prank was over."

Bei Xinmiao was taken aback for a moment.There was an instant feeling of relief. "You mean nothing happened?" Paused for a moment, then annoyed again, "Have you been joking with me! Think this kind of joke is funny?"

Xiao Zhengnan opened the last folder in the computer's USB flash drive and showed him the last photo, which was the photo of Jasmine leaving the tent in disappointment.

Then Xiao Zhengnan played silently to the ceiling.

After Bei Xinmiao was relieved, she began to realize that the story might not be over, so he turned his head to look at Xiao Zhengnan. "Then what……"

"She's gone... But it's even more difficult for me to calm down." Xiao Zhengnan said. "I'm so excited...and you are lying beside me like that, I try to put clothes on you to dispel the thoughts you shouldn't have, but I..."

"You mean after Molly left, you..." Bei Xinmiao asked, her tone becoming unnatural.He turned the computer screen to himself, looking at a few photos of Jasmine before she left.Calm down and take a closer look, the unsightly appearance of the hand in the picture should belong to Xiao Zhengnan.

The picture of Molly's characteristic little hand was touching his cheek.She hasn't appeared since then.Then there's her departure.

After thoroughly seeing these photos, Bei Xinmiao breathed a sigh of relief, feeling that she was really overly excited before.He was stripped naked, and it was in front of a girl. Although this kind of thing is infuriating, but in short, nothing worse happened. It can only be regarded as the fault of the children.He pushed the computer aside and lay down on the bed gloomily.muttered. "I don't understand why you make such a joke."

"I'm not joking. I haven't finished yet." Xiao Zhengnan said.

Bei Xinmiao's heartbeat began to speed up, and she almost groaned in pain. "What the hell did you do again? Stop making up a history of bravery. No one will believe it!"

"I fucked up... this is the first time I've ever faced the real you... I guess you're too drunk to know anyway. I can't help it, I'm so excited, I have to get it out. I You can't go outside the tent to do it. And you're the reason I'm excited. I just do it so naturally."

Bei Xinmiao glanced at him contemptuously, making an expression of disbelief.But the strange thing is that the previous angry mood gradually faded, even if what Xiao Zhengnan said was true, he didn't feel it was worth getting excited about.Perhaps it is because now that they have reached a more extreme relationship, they feel that there is no need to make a fuss about what happened before.

"That feeling, the excitement and excitement, is unforgettable and indescribable. I couldn't sleep at all. I couldn't help but come again."

Surprised, Bei Xinmiao gave him another helpless look.He could imagine a ridiculous picture of an adolescent boy facing this situation. "It's better to say it directly. How many shots have you fired?"

Xiao Zhengnan turned his head and looked at him, "Aren't you angry? It's so strange that you're not angry when I talk about worse things?" Then he looked proud. "Many times. I just knew I was good."

"Bragging, I don't believe you had the guts at that time."

"Am I like someone who has no guts? In fact, I only have two shots on you, and nothing behind you."

Bei Xinmiao mocked him. "Couldn't it be that it's more convenient to cum straight onto the toilet paper? Forget it, stop making it up. It doesn't make your image any bigger."

Xiao Zhengnan whispered into his ear and said, "At that time, I already knew that men's can be used..."

Bei Xinmiao slowly widened her eyes.He's a little out of his mind.

"I was very nervous at the beginning...but you don't feel it, you won't resist. I went smoothly. However, because I was too excited, I got carried away and made it too intense. I didn't panic when I found out that you were bleeding gone."

"Enough is enough. Bragging should be done in moderation."

"I did." Xiao Zhengnan smiled and kissed him, and suddenly pushed him on the bed. "Recalling these, I am most excited. If you recall carefully, you will find clues. After you woke up, you said that you were not feeling well. I took the initiative to send you home. You rested at home for two days before coming to class. I once went to see I passed you and asked you what was wrong, but you refused to tell. I made up a lie to lie to you, saying that you fell down the mountain after being drunk, and you should have injured yourself. But you strongly denied it. I am secretly happy that you died To save face, it happened to help me. Otherwise, if you are willing to doubt, you will be the first to think of me..."

Bei Xinmiao suddenly remembered.That memory wasn't vague, because he was really in pain, but he didn't think about it at all.Of course it was because of inexperience.And it's really embarrassing to talk to anyone about such a question.Zeng really thought that he was drunk and fell.Thinking about it this way, what Xiao Zhengnan said is probably true.

"You?" Bei Xinmiao was too angry to speak again.

"You keep saying that you regret that we started high school. I thought it was time to tell you." Xiao Zhengnan laughed. "Now you know that it actually happened then, shouldn't you be extremely happy? Although it was in a situation where you didn't know it - only this is a pity. I thought you would never accept this... from After that day, I never forgot about you, I think about you every night. I even want to kiss you again, haha, I never thought we would have today, if I knew you could accept it, I should have acted earlier. "

"Rogue!" Bei Xinmiao was extremely angry.