traveling doctor

What is despair?

Manman was too young to understand, she would just cry and say "Mom doesn't want me anymore".

If you ask Yao Shuo this question, he will definitely show a very ironic smile, and then say some harsh words to greet other people's IQ, EQ, and everything. Pedestrians and children alone experience their own feelings.

Despair is - no hope in sight.

Life is passing away day by day, and old age is eating away all his pride.He felt that life was getting stronger and stronger, and he was shrinking more and more. Sometimes he sat up in a dream in the middle of the night and found that he had become a bug that had lost some armor and strength, so soft that he would die if he was pinched.

The world is full of fear, but he no longer has the power to be fearless.Every time a big tree grows a ring, it will expand a layer outward, while the human ring grows on every blood vessel, every hair, and every time there is an additional ring, the future will become narrower and duller.

However, there is no way to do this. A female writer said: Are you young?It doesn't matter, you will be old in two years.

From this point of view, life itself is a desperate and helpless process, forced to be born, grow up with difficulty, become stronger bit by bit, force the world to admit that you have a place here, and think that you have won, But when you get it, you lose it slowly, which is really a big joke.

If you ask He Xiaozhi, he will abstractly tell you that when the "demon" occupying his body leaves, every moment is heaven, and when he thinks, that demon will come back and never leave him, calm When it just exists like a gap, it is despair.

One of the most unsolvable questions in the world is "Why me", why am I the one who suffers, and why do each of them seem so happy?

Depression patients are like living in the perspective of a dog. The whole world is only in three colors of black, white and gray. They can't escape no matter what, and they can't even grasp a life-saving straw. Overcoming, the pain of being unable to control oneself, wanting to jump off a tall building, wanting to end this kind of life.

This night, except for those who were still awake, everyone seemed to be affected by some kind of brain wave connection, and a cloud seemed to hang over the city.

Huang Jinchen woke up at the slightest sign of trouble. He had trained for many years and his mind was extremely firm. When he looked up, he found that Kou Tong had woken up at some point and was standing by the window frowning.

"What?" Huang Jinchen asked.

"I don't know," Kou Tong opened the curtain, but no moonlight came in, "What's going on... I always feel like something is out of control."

At this moment, Kou Tong's mother knocked on the door and told about Manman's dream. After she left, Kou Tong sat back on the bed: "Old Yao turned on the light, and there was a sound in He Xiaozhi's room. They all Affected... I don't know what happened to Qin Qin."

"What about you?" Huang Jinchen only cared about this one question.

Kou Tong rubbed the center of his brows: "I didn't fall asleep just now—I don't know why, but I always have an ominous premonition."

Huang Jinchen bent down, lit a cigarette and stuffed it into his mouth: "Be quiet for a while, then come up to sleep."

He stroked Kou Tong's hair, and the feel was not as soft as it looked: "If you can't sleep again, I will give you a sleep, and I guarantee you will sleep till dawn."

Kou Tong felt that he had been molested, which was very fresh, so he leaned on the head of the bed, squinted his eyes and looked at him with a half-smile, there was an illusion that two lines of swearing came out of Huang Erpang's grinning mouth, which looked very funny.

In retrospect, except for the short period of discomfort after learning about the seed project, this man was always funny with a bit of deviant.

Psychology cannot surpass physical existence. When the problem is serious enough to a certain symptom, it must be accompanied by damage to the nervous system.

At least Kou Tong thinks that harsh physical training will largely increase a person's psychological tolerance—the heartless man surnamed Huang is a good example.

When Huang Jinchen was awakened by the biological clock again, he found that the room was still dark.He realized that something was wrong almost immediately, he jumped up from the bed, glanced out of the window, and then pushed Kou Tong's shoulder: "Hey, wake up, come and see this."

Kou Tong does not have such a thing as a biological clock. As long as it is still dark, his physiological function will automatically judge that he can still sleep. When he was pushed awake, he patted Huang Jinchen's face with the back of his hand in a daze: "Good boy, don't sleep." Quarrel."

Huang Jinchen: "..."

It's over, my wife is a pig, he thought silently—of course, he didn't dare to say it.

So Huang Jinchen calmly stretched his hand into the quilt, pinched Kou Tong's waist, and the latter immediately bounced up like a dead fish being shocked by electric shock. He squinted his eyes and adjusted for a while before asking, "What's wrong?"

"Look at what time it is."

Kou Tong reached for the alarm clock beside the bed, pressed the fluorescent light on the screen, and was stunned for a moment: "Seven o'clock...is it morning?"

At seven o'clock in the morning, even if it is the shortest time of winter, the outside cannot be completely dark. At this moment, it is like midnight outside. There are no stars, no moon, and even... no wind.

Kou Tong's eyes suddenly cleared up: "Put on your clothes, don't disturb other people, let's go out."

The two quickly changed their clothes, quietly left from the small passage in the living room, and then got out.

The lights in the corridor of Kou Tong’s house are voice-activated, and they are very sensitive. Generally speaking, not to mention the sound of deliberately heavy footsteps on the ground, even the rubbing of clothes can affect the lights on the upper and lower floors. As a result, the two of them walked out. But it didn't light up.

Kou Tong clapped his hands, but still no light.

"The power is off." He said softly.

"Then your computer..." Huang Jinchen asked.

"It's okay, the battery can last for two hours, and the data analysis will be finished soon." After Kou Tong finished speaking, he gave Huang Jinchen a meaningful look, "If you didn't come to disrupt the situation, maybe we would have gone out by now."

"Oh, I was wrong!" Huang Jinchen stamped his feet and beat his chest, "If I hold back, maybe the luggage has already moved to your house by now!"

Kou Tong stumbled and almost rolled down, he coughed dryly: "Little lady, take your time, even if we don't have Fengguanxiapei when we go back, we still have to carry the big sedan chair, you really don't need it!" ...so horny."

Huang Jinchen squeezed his throat and said, "Damn ghost!"

Kou Tong was silent for a moment: "Don't...don't, I...my waist is weak."

The two walked out of the building one after the other. There was no light in the whole city, and even the air was stagnant, and there was no wind.

All the voices were hidden, the occasional passing night car stopped halfway, Kou Tong bent down and leaned against the window, and found the driver with his head on the side, as if he was asleep.

"Master? Master?" Kou Tong knocked on the window, but the people inside did not respond.

The people in the whole city are unconscious, the light of the whole city has been taken away by something, the long street, except for the footsteps of two people, there is no other movement.

It's like...a ghost town turned into a dead place.

Huang Jinchen no longer had a playful smile on his face, and the two of them looked at each other, feeling that Qin Qin's small universe seemed to explode to a certain extent and explode.