Reborn Professional Soldier

Looking at the furnishings in the room, Lin Feng was a little surprised. There was only a bed and a desk in the small closed room. The lamp on the desk was still on, forming a strong contrast with the darkness outside the window.

He stood up and ran his fingers across the desk, the wooden table top felt rough.

Looking through the window with the guardrail, the street lamps outside were emitting a dim yellow luster, and the smooth concrete road reflected the lights, and a pair of patrolling soldiers were walking by.

The pictures that are deeply in memory are not the same anymore.

I remember that the flower bed on the left has been rebuilt several years ago and replaced it with a white stone flower bed in the shape of a large jar, which is full of colorful flowers. You can see a different color every two months, but now... …

Lin Feng stared at it, and he was sure that he was right.

The flower bed was still an old-fashioned flower bed surrounded by cement blocks, and there was a big gap at the end of the line of sight, which was hit by a car when he was 16 years old. After that, his father gave him a hard training. Dun, if it wasn't for Uncle Zhao persuading him to take the matter to himself, otherwise he would definitely be locked up that day.

Thinking of confinement, Lin Feng suddenly turned his head and looked behind him.

A small room with simple furnishings, a desk, a bed, a familiar picture, the bed is covered with blue and white checked sheets, and on the table, a letterhead is placed between the hands supported by him.

There was an opening letter written on the letterhead, a letter of repentance.

I'm wrong.

After a deep self-analysis, after reviewing the cause and effect, I was wrong.

I shouldn't use my status to form cliques, and I shouldn't let Sanhai and the others bully others, beat Tan Hailiang, but don't stop them.

I……

Most of the paper is blank, showing that there are still a lot of things that have not been finished.

The empty white paper made Lin Feng's thoughts wander, he couldn't find the north and south, some things were caught, but only a tail was left, wandering repeatedly in his brain.

In a trance, the memory wakes up in my mind.

It was a scorching afternoon.

A teenager stood in the corridor, outside was the blue sky, standing in front of him, his tear-filled eyes were full of anger.

The boy pointed at his nose and cursed, "How are you so superior? Don't you just have a powerful father? Why do you call me a coward!?"

Sanhai jumped out and slapped the young man on the head, "Just read your book well, what are you talking about, you want to be a soldier like a little chicken? You don't even want to die Know."

"What's wrong with me being a soldier? You are the princes, so you look down on others, don't you? If I had a powerful father, I wouldn't fucking be a soldier? I worked hard on my physical fitness and followed training all day long. Isn’t it just bad grades? Isn’t it just that you don’t have enough physical fitness? But what’s wrong with me going to the military academy!?”

It's nothing, it's just that you are suitable for finding an office, a clerical job, clean, and being a soldier is not suitable for you. I am doing it for your own good.

He still remembered that he thought so at that time, but before he could say it, he was extinguished by the boy's fist.

Perhaps it was because of his disdainful and sympathetic eyes, which ignited the anger of the young man on the verge of losing control.

He saw the young man rushing towards him, but San Hai raised his hand to stop him easily, knocked him to the ground, and the young man who fell on the ground yelled and cursed relentlessly. San Hai, who had a strong military aura, was completely enraged, and called Xiao Hua together to beat him up.

At that time, I still kept in mind not to bully others because of the children of high-ranking cadres, but just stood by silently, but did not speak to stop it.

Lin Feng silently picked up the letterhead, looked at the blank page on the ground, and a line of words appeared in his head unexpectedly.

……

Before today, I never knew that a simple decision of mine would hurt others. Maybe, I knew, but I acquiesced in the growth of this sense of superiority in my heart, which resulted in such consequences.

Lin Feng stood up abruptly, walked to the door and knocked vigorously on the door.

The loud sound of "dongdong" seemed to hit his heart directly, almost jumping out of his throat.

he remembered.

Such a scene, such a picture, was when he was 17 years old, and after such a conflict, he was unwilling to write a letter of repentance against his will.

And he is now 32 years old.

The hand that knocked on the door was dark and rough, with protruding knuckles and full of strength. It was by no means his hand that had become round and fair because of sitting in the office for a long time.

Lin Feng found that his throat was thirsty and bitter, his lungs could not take in air, and all voices were pinched in his throat and could not be uttered.

All the strength in the whole body was taken away, only the fist that kept beating still left a little feeling.

The flesh and the iron plate collided together, and there were bursts of pain.

"Have you figured it out?" Father's voice came from outside the door, speaking slowly in a low voice, with the majesty that he has always been irresistible.

Figured it out?

What do you want to understand?

Dad, where am I and why am I here.

He wanted to yell, but he couldn't make a sound. His beating heart was blocked in his throat. He couldn't get up. He struggled hard, but finally there was a tearing sound, "Dad..." Open the door, tell me, what's going on?

There was no sound outside the door for a long time, and my father must have gone away.

He pressed his forehead against the cold iron door, forcing himself to calm down.

"Dong dong." There were two soft thuds outside the door.

Lin Feng was shocked, his eyes widened as if he wanted to see the person over there through the door.

"Xiaofeng, stop making trouble, your dad is getting angry, take out the letter of repentance tomorrow, and have a better attitude, ah."

His mother's gentle and familiar voice made him feel at ease. He pressed his clenched fist against the door, took a deep breath hard, and said, "Mom, let me out." This time it did make a sound.

"You still don't know your father's temper? Don't bother, just calm down and reflect on yourself."

"No, Mom, let me go out, I want to see you." Hearing that his mother wanted to leave, Lin Feng hurriedly called out.

The mother's voice was full of laughter, "Silly boy, my mother will come out tomorrow to wake you up."

After waiting for a while, there was no more sound from outside. Lin Feng knew that his mother had also left.

Also, every time his father punished him, his mother always fully supported her. Although she felt distressed, she never defended herself. As far as the mother was concerned, her husband was always right.

Lin Feng turned around, leaned against the door, squatted down slowly, inserted his fingers into the hair gap and grabbed it tightly, his scalp felt bursts of pain, and his eyes were bloodshot.

At the end of the line of sight is the bedpan under the bed, which still has his urine from 15 years ago.

Oh shit.

Lin Feng understood a little bit.

I simply went back to 15 years ago.

Just why did I appear here?

No idea, he really couldn't figure it out.

But, that's what it is.

When the result has come out, the process is no longer important.

Lin Feng took a breath, tried his best to prop up his almost exhausted body, walked slowly to the bedside, took the paper and looked at it again and again.

He really knows how to write a letter of repentance. After being a civilian cadre for so many years, he wrote summaries, plans, and reports one by one by himself, but the letter of repentance is really unfamiliar.

Since the selection training was dismissed, his father, who was a major general, sent him out of the country, and when he came back, he found a leisurely civilian job in the army, and he never asked him to write any repentance. Book.

Now, in his drawer, there is still a self-criticism in the interlayer of the leather case of the diary, the self-criticism that he regrets the most, the most sincere self-criticism that he has not given out.

He still remembers the contents inside, vividly...

Review

I'm wrong.

After a deep self-examination, after reviewing the cause and effect, I was wrong.

I shouldn't deny my existence just because of what other people think.Let alone deny the efforts you have made because of your background.I should strengthen my beliefs and implement them resolutely, believe in my beliefs and work hard for them.

However, because of my complacency and misconceptions about my future life, I missed the deepest expectation in my heart.

When I looked at the peaceful scenery outside the window, and when the exercise reports representing the blood and beliefs of the soldiers slipped from my eyes, I realized that this place was never what I wanted, never.

I admit, I was crushed, I was destroyed by my haste and my absurd innocence, I lost my childhood dreams and let them slip through my fingers and disappear without a trace.

I think back to those passionate days, those days when I practiced and prohibited, those comrades-in-arms, those companions, those times spent together.

My remorse has broken me down.

In the back, there are many, many words, but they are blurred by tears, and I can no longer read them.

But now, just thinking about it this way, Lin Feng can recall the annoyance and sadness at that time.

The strength of his body was taken away, he fell on the bed, raised his hand to cover his eyes, the wet and scalding hand on his arm.

These long-gone memories are suddenly revealed now, which still makes him unbearable.

perhaps.

In a trance, he thought.

This may be an opportunity, an opportunity to fix mistakes.

Those memories that have already passed may be able to be guided on the right track again through my own hands.

Lin Feng wiped his face vigorously with his arm, jumped up, pulled out the chair and sat at the table.

One by one, the delicate handwriting is vivid on the paper, and all the apologies are sincerely written.

Only when I missed those dreams did I realize how abhorrent what I had done. Years of tempering have already polished away his edges and corners, and the haughty heart has also been smoothed because of an unruly life.

What right does he have to prevent others from realizing their dreams? Even if it is not suitable, it is not up to him to decide. Everyone needs a chance, and it takes time to prove, why does his superiority exist?

Is it because you have a good father?But a comfortable life is never what he wants, he needs a more passionate life to prove his existence.

When the eloquent piece of regret was written, Lin Feng couldn't help smiling wryly.

It seems that sitting more in the office is not without benefits. This beautiful handwriting is a few paragraphs higher than the previous opening chapter.

After struggling for a while, I simply copied it again.

Fortunately, there is a comparison, otherwise he really didn't know that his handwriting with a pen 15 years ago was so bad.

After the modification, although the beauty between the lines is still revealed, it has changed a lot.

After the last word fell, Lin Feng tore off the paper gracefully, lifted it up to look at it through the desk lamp, raised his finger and flicked it lightly, showing a smile on his face.

Whatever the reason, it's 15 years ago, but it's good, really good.

Putting the letter paper in order, Lin Feng stood up and shook his arms.

Looking at the gray and black concrete floor, I am eager to try.

If he remembered correctly, the place he wanted to go was not something he could do with his current physical fitness.