[Comprehensive] Die well, lie down every day

I am dreaming, but this time it is different from the past, because I am not the protagonist in the dream but a bystander's perspective.

What I'm spying on is a certain person's past...a love affair belonging to the real Mayu Sasaki.

I don't know how much that boy likes that child, but I know that the child must like that boy very much, to the point where he puts his heart and soul into it.

After opening his eyes in the morning, he would send a good morning text message to the boy, and before falling asleep at night, he would always put his mobile phone by the bedside, looking at his mobile phone expectantly until he fell asleep.When walking with the boy, I will be at a loss; when eating, I will write down the boy's favorite dishes; when talking to him, I will stutter; my eyes will always watch the boy's every move.

Logically speaking, she should be able to get something in return, but with all her dedication, she couldn't get the response she deserved.

I have never received a good morning text message from the other party, and I always fall asleep with a disappointed expression at night.The boy’s walking pace is always fast, only occasionally slowing down; the boy always calls a group of friends when eating, and doesn’t care about her sitting alone beside him; stayed on.

And the word she got the most from boys was "Kyoko Sasakawa".

...Then things happened just as I thought, the two finally separated.

The Sasaki Mayu I saw was a more timid and shy person than I guessed from reading the diary at the time.Because of her beauty, many boys admire her, but at the same time, she is always teased by others because of her personality.

"I can only say," I squatted on the side and sighed secretly, looking at the figure of the boy who was always lingering around that boy. "It's not nice to meet people, like this." With a little wry smile on my lips, I watched the lonely figure of the child leaning forward again and again, and being pushed away again and again.

To be honest, rather than saying that I think the little girl Sasaki is not nice to people, it's better to say that I didn't like her way of doing things in the first place.I can't say there's anything wrong with such behavior, but I just can't stand it.

Lancer might be right about one thing, I'm pretty...stubborn.

Even that guy would often smile wryly and say that I am stuck in a dead end, that I can't learn to restrain myself, and that I have an impulsive personality and can't bear it.And after saying those words, that guy would always add another sentence, saying: "But there is no way, I just like you like this."

Ugh, but in the end, the guy who said that broke up with me saying "you're always such an annoyance".

Sure enough, everything I said when I was a child was a joke when I grew up.

"...Senior Mochida...really," Sasaki Mayu once again stood guard at the school gate after school, waiting for the boy he liked, and said the same words again as before. "Really, can't it be me?" She asked with a teary expression.

With a beautiful face and always soft posture, even as a woman, when I heard this sentence, I probably couldn't bear to refuse it.But the boy actually refused.

"Sorry... tsk, what should I say." The boy scratched the back of his head in trouble. "Sasaki, you are really nice, but I really like Ms. Kyoko more. She is very gentle, and she is very close to others without putting on airs, so I... In short, Sasaki, you should give up! I am not suitable for you, that's it! "As if to get rid of some trouble, the boy fled after leaving this sentence.

——Better than gentle words, am I not more gentle?Am I not more approachable than being close?

In an instant, I read such a message from the face of the child Mayu Sasaki... In the unwilling eyes, I felt the child's unprecedented dark emotions.But because of her usual timidity, those emotions were only for a moment and disappeared immediately.

And the fact that she pestered a boy like this gradually spread in the campus unconsciously, and the girls around her who were full of criticism towards her before treated her more and more.

The most serious one was when the girls around her deliberately teased her, forcing her to wear clothes that she didn't like even though they were beautiful, and stood alone at the crossroads, waiting for the first boy to strike up a conversation with her.

She stood alone at the entrance of the street, while the other girls hid aside to watch and laugh.

The eyes of people passing by made her uncomfortable, and it was also sad that no one wanted to talk to her. Everything around her was incompatible with her.

Then, a boy appeared.Perhaps it was because of the expression on her face that seemed to be about to cry, which made the boy feel irrelevant, or for other reasons, the boy did come to her side. "Hey, what's wrong with you? I remember you are from our school..."

She said this to the boys as she had said to those girls before: "I, I like you...please date me..." Her tone was almost the same as crying, and she bit her mouth in despair.

"Ha..." The boy showed a slightly frightened expression, thought about it thoughtfully, but suddenly grabbed her hand. "Let's go." After saying that, he led her to run wildly all the way, and the boy didn't let go until the crowd was relatively small. "Sorry, I still have something to do. But it's still safe here, and there are few people. If you feel scared, you can go to the sushi restaurant in front and wait for me."

The boy probably meant that he could send her back, but she shook her head slightly and refused, - this place happened to be not very far from her home.

But the boy didn't notice her movement, but hurriedly ran away in another direction after yelling anxiously.

The next time I have the opportunity to meet, I hope to thank each other.Looking at the back of the boy running away, she muttered softly.

I recognize that boy, although it is a little different from the current one, but it is indeed Takeshi Yamamoto.But after that, although the two were in the same school, they never seemed to meet each other again.

And that incident was probably due to Sasaki Mayu's rare luck.I looked at the expression of the child looking into the distance with a little anxiety, and thought so.

Later, after school, she saw a boy in the next class cleaning miserably alone.

Perhaps it was because the figure of that boy was too similar to her own, but she, who originally planned to ignore it, stepped forward and helped the boy to share half of the matter.

The boy was shorter than the boys in the same grade, and his voice of apology was as thin as a mosquito. His timid appearance really resembled Mayu Sasaki's.

The intersection of the two is probably just like this, but one night, she sneaked into the school because she was looking for the notes left behind at the school, and she happened to see another side of that cowardly boy.

A dazzling orange flame burned on his forehead, his eyes were determined, and he became like another person completely.

Looking at such a young man, she couldn't help reaching out her hand.

In the end, it was such a restrained but dazzling young man who crushed her.

She liked that boy, ever since she accidentally saw the other side of that boy when she was 15 years old.Then around the age of 16, she finally worked up the courage to confess.That happened to be the time when her parents passed away unexpectedly. She believed that if it was that boy, he would be able to comfort her, hug her tenderly, and talk to her with warm words.

She believed so, and confessed that she tried her best.

got rejected.The reason is——

"I'm sorry... I have someone I like..."

Still Kyoko Sasakawa.

She, who was originally fragile and sensitive, has become a little distorted since then.At the same time, strange people approached her.

She is unwelcome, so no one would approach her proactively.She is not liked, so everything must be on guard.At the end of the story, her final end is just to choose to leave silently alone, preferably in a world where no one can find her.

She thought of a way to escape everything.

But I still want to see someone, someone with a gentle and tolerant smile.

But after all, it wasn't that person who came to see her, and she could only look at the back of a certain boy she seemed to know, and slowly entered a dream that would never wake up again.

Before going to bed, she said silently with her voiceless throat: "It would be great if... Sasaki Mayu's life... could be different." She was cautious, looking forward to it.

The dream ends here.

I was woken up by the non-stop ringing mobile phone beside the bed, "My head really hurts..." I muttered, with my eyes closed, I raised my heavy arms and took the mobile phone beside the bed to answer the call.

It's Tsunayoshi Sawada.