Daily life of roommates

On this day, the two dorms got together after a long absence, only Tao Jin did not come from abroad.

Chubby's appetite is still so good, and he maintains a kind of slightly fat and plump figure.

Shao Lang had to go on a diet for his career, so he said enviously, "You can eat so well, don't you want to lose weight?"

Fat Meng thought for a while and said: "Food, I want it; thinness, I want it. You can't have both, I'll go for it..." Ah Wu took a bite of a piece of meat and ate it.

In the middle of the night, Fat Meng asked Tong Zhuo to pick him up.

Wanfuhe wanted to leave at first, saying that there would be a morning meeting tomorrow, but Shao Lang gave him a bad meal, saying that he was not loyal enough to a buddy or something.

Gou Yi, who was drunk, also hugged him and rubbed his nose on his lapel, crying and said: "You are capable! You are fighting to be the dog of the leader! I, I can't even wag my tail well... If you dare to leave today, I will take off my clothes and go to your company to find you!"

Wanfuhe knew that he didn't dare, and that he wouldn't remember what he said when he was sober, but he was still in trouble, and in the end he simply didn't leave, loosening his tightly tied tie and saying, "Whatever the morning meeting, tonight Let's not go home drunk at night."

Shao Lang put his arms around his shoulders and the two brothers patted him nicely and said: "That's right, we are all single nobles, and we are light-handed - when you find someone to settle down, you can be qualified like Pang Meng." Did you say leave early?"

The group finished drinking and went to karaoke, then ate some skewers, and finally had nowhere to go to Gouyi, so they proposed to go to the place where he lived to play all night or something.

A group of people got out of Shao Lang's RV, helping the old and the young grinning obliquely. The night wind blew a slightly drunk wind, and the tail of youth fluttered. They seemed to have returned to a relatively simple university campus. They just opened the side door The uncle who grills skewers has meat and beer in his stomach, and he has nowhere to vent his happiness and inexplicable sadness.

They sang songs, from "Sister, you take the bow, brother, I will walk on the shore", to "The king sent me to patrol the mountains", and then to "Yaoyao Cheke makes trouble" and so on, they swayed into the door of the apartment.

When 2B was enjoying himself, suddenly a figure flashed beside him, pulled Gou Yi over and said, "I've been waiting for you all night, why did you come back?"

Gou Yi took a look with drunken eyes, yo, I know him, but he didn't want to see this person at all, so he shook off his hand, hiccupped and said, "You, what are you doing here... Uh, we have already broken up Don't come to me..."

It was Ke Hu who came out halfway. He managed to find out where Gou Yi lives now. He wanted to stop someone to talk to him and go up to have a cup of coffee, but he didn't expect that no one would come back. But it was a group of people, and they said that they broke up and don't come to me again, which makes people feel embarrassed.

He glanced around Gouyi's companions and found a person who looked like a dog, and said in a cold voice: "I said, why are you so eager to break up with me? It turns out that there are people outside, and there are more than one, you, you bastard!" goods!"

Gou Yi waved his hand, "You can say whatever you like, my business has nothing to do with you."

Ke Hu still can't believe that a person who used to obey him seems to be a completely different person now. He grabbed Gou Yi's collar and shook it back and forth, yelling at him: "You bitch! You seduced me! Why did you seduce me? Seduce me!"

Shao Lang and Wanfuhe rushed over to rescue Gou Yi, and Wanfuhe came forward to mediate—he was pretty good at such things.

"Sir, please be more civilized! Don't make too much trouble after breaking up."

Ke Hu rushed up to take Wanfuhe, Wanfuhe couldn't just sit still, so he gave two shots, and when Shao Lang saw that he had made a move, he also dragged Xiao Yuejian, who had been wandering in vain, into the battle circle.

Ke Hu originally wanted to fight hard, but today's posture seemed to be difficult to take advantage of, so he stared at Gou Yi on the other side of the human wall, panting and gritted his teeth, "I ask you, have you never Ever liked me?!"

Gou Yi scratched his face and frowned impatiently, "It doesn't matter if you like it or not! Anyway, I don't like it now."

Ke Hu said: "Are those things you confessed to me all fart?!"

Gou Yi said: "Then when I invited you for a drink to discuss business for the first time, you bragged to me about the length of your dick. If you use English letters to measure it, it can be placed from A to Z. As a result, see I didn't know until I saw the real thing, it really is from A to Z, but it's just the distance to be placed on the computer keyboard!"

Shao Lang imagined the length for a while, and then puffed out, his eyes lingering on Ke Hu's bottom.

Ke Hu subconsciously wanted to cover his lower body with his hands, and he argued shamefully, "The length of a man is not the key, but the hardness is the most important thing—you bastard! Loose! Big loose!!"

Gou Yi quarreled with him, "I'm not loose! It's you who is so small! A toothpick pokes a spittoon, and earthworms swim in Taihu Lake!"

Wanfuhe also snorted, and persuaded: "Don't talk about it, although he is a bit younger, but this analogy still means that you are loose."

Gou Yi didn't care now that the alcohol was coming back up again, he felt dizzy and uncomfortable, and felt even more annoyed, so he simply said: "How about I loose the goods?!"

Ke Hu glared at him as if he was carrying a sea of ​​blood and deep hatred, "Okay, you admitted this yourself, you are lewd and vulgar, hooking up and playing with my feelings! ——I want you to pay for my damages!"

Gou Yi said: "If you want money, there is no life! You come and get it!"

Ke Hu was about to rush over to beat him, but was held back by Shao Lang and others. Shao Lang said, "Mr. As far as I know, the rented house in Gou Yi was also given to you for nothing, even if it is a nurturing relationship, it is somewhat compensated."

Ke Hu regarded Shao Lang as an imaginary rival in love, and cursed: "Your new love is still someone else's broken shoes! I use old things and you still treat them like treasures! You don't think it's dirty!"

When Gou Yi was drunk, his ideas sprang up, and he immediately said: "It's not old! The chrysanthemum is only two centimeters old on the outside, and it's completely new on the inside!"

Ke Hu was so angry that he struggled hard, yelling and swearing, the scolding was very ugly, what kind of shit, they are all his concubines, they are all stinky hooligans, a few of them must be messing around soon or something.

Gou Yi jumped up and scolded him, hugged Gou Yi's cheek and kissed him angrily, and said, "This is my new girlfriend?!...Yes! We're going to play NP in a while. , without your share, I will piss you off!"

The commotion had already alarmed the big security guards. At this time, the security guards had already called a few people, asked who was the owner, and kicked out Ke Hu, who was not the owner.

When the surrounding area calmed down a bit, Shao Lang discovered that there was still a spectator in the corner of the hall, frowning and watching this farce with a contemptuous attitude.

Gou Yi was drunk and slumped on the ground, patting the ground, playing drunkenly, "You know how to bully me! I've had enough of little JJ's anger!"

Shao Lang and the others pulled him up and half dragged him to take the elevator.

Coincidentally, the spectator just now also took the unity, and what's more, he was on the same floor.

Shao Lang paid a little attention to the other party, it seems that this is Gou Yi's opponent, the former junior.

That being said, there is still a bit of a shadow of the past.

Shao Lang greeted him into the room, Gou Yi was almost unconscious, slurring some drunken words, he was thrown into the bedroom, after a little tidying up, he was let to sleep.

The three people who were still awake decided to play all night according to the original plan.

But what to play?

Shao Lang remembered that he had put a set of mahjong tiles here, so he found it out and put it on the table.Now it seems that everything is ready, only one person is owed—he, Wanfuhe, and Xiao Yuejian, the standard three are missing one.

Shao Lang thought for a while, went out, walked to the opposite door, and knocked bang on the door.

After knocking for a while, the door opened, and Xue Di appeared inside wearing pajamas with wet hair and an unfriendly expression.

Shao Lang looked up and down, leaned on the door and said with a smile: "Young fellow, don't come here without any problems, why didn't you say hello to the seniors just now, it's really rude."

Xue Di said coldly: "Don't dare. Senior Shao Lang, you are a big star now, so you don't dare to climb high."

Shao Lang chuckled lightly, "I still recognize this—why are you going to sleep? I just saw you come back alone, and I didn't see any playmates. It seems to be a lonely weekend."

Xue Di said: "Senior, do you have something to do?"

Shao Lang licked his lips and said, "It's nothing, I want to comfort your loneliness."

Xue Di raised his brows slightly, taking time to relax, "How do you plan to comfort her?"

Shao Lang tilted his head slightly and said, "How is it? We are playing 4P over there, are you interested?"

Xue Di said in a cold voice: "...Does that also include senior Gou Yi?"

Shao Lang paused for a moment, then smiled like a flower, leaned forward, pressed a finger on Xue Di's chest, and said, "You are not interested in me as a star, but you care more about your senior Gou. Why is that?"

Xue Di managed to calm down so that he would not be forced to retreat. However, this question also made him a little embarrassed and startled, and he said awkwardly: "I just... care about my subordinates... If there is any unpleasant scandal, I will not let you go." alright."

Shao Lang said with a smile: "I don't care, what's your position?" He turned and walked back to his room door, looked back and said with a smile, "This invitation is still valid for the time being, if you give up this opportunity, you will Never know what we did to your drunk senior Gou."

With a cold face, Xue Di slammed the door shut.

Shao Lang shrugged, and went back to his house indifferently. Wanfuhe and Xiao Yuejian were eating peanuts and beer found in the refrigerator, and said, "Didn't you go to pick up people? Where are people?"

Shao Lang said, "Don't mention it..."

At this time, the door suddenly slammed loudly, like a door slamming.

The corner of Shao Lang's mouth twitched into a smile, and he turned to open the door.

As expected, Xue Di, who had changed into casual clothes, was standing outside the door. He said sternly, "I accept the invitation."

Five minutes later, Shao Lang, Wan Fuhe, Xiao Yuejian and Xue Di sat around the table, shuffling the cards and playing mahjong.

Xue Di said dumbly: "This, is the 4P you mentioned?"

Shao Lang nodded happily, "Three missing and one missing just now, plus you are exactly four people, no more, no less, a game suitable for adults to play."

Wan Fuhe counted the cards skillfully and said: "I am a person who rarely brags, but to be honest, I also learned a lot of card playing skills from our chairman. Have you guys brought enough money today?"

Shao Lang rolled his eyes at him and said, "Don't blame me for not reminding you, your chairman is a famous stubborn boss, don't let that old man eat you up."

Wan Fuhe smiled and said, "I know it well."

Shao Lang sighed, "All those who drowned were able to swim, and those who fell to death were tightrope walkers."

Wan Fuhe said: "Encourage each other. Of course, the unspoken rules are not unique to the entertainment industry, but the clear will be clear, and the turbid will be turbid. Life is not a choice." He threw out a card.

Xue Di held back for a long time, but now he couldn't help but interjected, "Then where is Gou Yi?"

Shao Lang pursed his lips and said in the direction of the bedroom: "Here, sleep there. Naked Dog is the worst drinker. He is in a bad mood now, and everyone is drunk if he is not drunk—God stick, what are you waiting for?" ? It's your turn, too slow."

Seeing that they were listening attentively, Xiao Yue suddenly raised her hand to signal them to mute.

Everyone thinks that he is a god. Could it be that he feels something that ordinary people can't feel?

Everyone silently waited for his reaction.

After a while, Xiao Yuejian said in a firm voice, "There is a mosquito here."

Shao Lang jumped up and said, "My physique attracts mosquitoes, I hate them to death!"

Xue Di said, "I'll go back to my house and get mosquito spray."

Xiao Yuejian said: "No need, you all sit down, I'll take care of it."

Everyone was skeptical, but they sat down according to the words, and there really was an annoying humming that fluctuated from left to right, louder and smaller.

Xiao Yuejian took out a fruit knife and slashed at the air, she was as quiet as a virgin and moved like a rabbit!

After a long while, he suddenly retracted the knife and sighed with his breath returning to his dantian, then picked up the dead mosquito from the mahjong table, and said, "It's a crime."

There is silence, there is not even the humming of mosquitoes in the world, there is only deathly silence.

Xue Di said in amazement: "Senior Xiao, I have heard about your miraculous miracles since I was in college. Today is really an eye-opener—may I ask what kind of kung fu you practiced?"

Xiao Yuejian wiped the fruit knife calmly and said: "It's nothing, I played some mobile games recently, cutting fruit."