In the golden cage

Just like a drunk who refuses to admit that he is drunk, Li Chen's first reaction was: I'm not sick.

Anyone who is suddenly told that he may have a tendency to be mentally ill will have this kind of reaction. After all, the word mentally ill is often used as a curse, rather than as a pathological state.

The doctor understood very well, so he made his tone as gentle as possible: "Mr. Li, please listen to me first, in fact, mental problems are very common among modern people. Anxiety and depression are very common phenomena, and the proportion is about ten. Let’s compare. Genetic factors account for a part, and family factors also account for a part. I roughly infer that Mr. Li, you should belong to the latter, but it may also be a combination of the two..."

Ever since Ji Shaoting left, Li Chen's mind has been full of mixed porridge and rotten soup. It was not until the doctor spoke for a long time that he slowly formed a questioning sentence: "What do you mean? Do I have a psychological problem?"

The doctor paused for a moment, then said lightly: "What we call health is not just about physical health. Social and psychological aspects are also indispensable. Mr. Li, you are young and promising, and you have strong abilities, so you have natural requirements for yourself. It is high, easy to stretch for a long time, and belongs to the high-risk group. I have a teacher who is the chief physician of a tertiary hospital. He has practiced medicine for many years and has rich experience. I think you should have time recently. Why don’t I take him to see him on a weekend? look?"

"I'm not sick."

The doctor was silent for three seconds, Li Chen heard a deep and long breath, and then the doctor's voice continued: "Mr. Li, I have known you for four or five years. Although I only see you twice a month, I also love you." I understand a little. You have a strong personality, stubborn, suspicious, and do not accept criticism—"

"I do not have!"

Those who know the current affairs should silence such anger, but the doctor seems to have made up his mind: "Your fierce denial is actually a clinical manifestation—"

There was a short beep to interrupt the call.

Li Chen cut off the conversation.

The doctor stood dryly on the side of the street for a while, staring at the darkened mobile phone screen, thinking that the job was gone.Li Chen was indeed the person who could not afford to offend in this world.

In that case, he came back to his senses and pressed the lock screen: In that case, let's explain this matter clearly.Li Chen's mental state was already very dangerous, and he still couldn't do anything about it.

So Li Chen received the doctor's WeChat message, and there was only a short sentence: Mrs. Li's departure was completely justifiable.

After a few seconds, the second sentence was more straightforward: no husband would install a camera at home to monitor his wife.

Li Chen immediately blushed with embarrassment: his fault, his fault!The whole world is telling him that all this is his fault!

But so what?Want him to change it?What's the use of changing it?Ji Shaoting will not come back again.

——Is there nothing wrong with Ji Shaoting?

Why did you leave without saying a word, knowing that you loved him more than your life, why didn't you say a word, didn't give him a chance to correct, just disappeared out of thin air.

Isn't he kind?Don't you just can't bear to see people suffer?Now that he is deeply in pain, unable to save himself and is about to drown, why does he just abandon himself like this?

Li Chen rushed into the cloakroom in three steps and two steps, opened the closet suddenly, and pulled out Ji Shaoting's clothes one by one.

The scissors were originally in the closet, and the middle drawer on the penultimate floor was specially used to store cutting tools such as sewing scissors.

Ji Shaoting never thought of taking any clothes with him, so he deliberately forgot the existence of the wardrobe.

Li Chen pulled Ji Shaoting's clothes out.These clothes, these sloughed bodies of Ji Shaoting like cicadas, each of them resided in Ji Shaoting for a certain period of time, and now Li Chen cut and tore them apart one by one, as if dismembering Ji Shaoting alive.

Tear off the cuffs, unbutton the buttons, and hollow out the cotton wool.

Yes, when Ji Shaoting called him crazy, he was crazy; when the doctor said he was sick, he was sick.Which crazy love does not see blood, he is a terminally ill lunatic, he wants Ji Shaoting's blood, his flesh, bones, every inch of veins, every organ, he wants everything Ji Shaoting has, he wants his love .

The sun streamed westward on the wall, until the drowsy daylight finally came, and the mixed night diffused the whole bedroom like smoke.

Li Chen fell into a pile of rags exhausted, his eyes red like a dying beast.

A pale hand was feebly raised in the air, fingers pressed the phone screen, after a while there was a voice in the air: Li Chen dialed the doctor's number.

"This Saturday," he said, "nine o'clock in the morning."

"Sally, I knew you had a way, this place is really great," Ji Shaoting looked at the bright and tidy new residence in front of him, "My God, words can't express my gratitude to you!"

"No, no, don't talk about this," Sally put her hand on Ji Shaoting's shoulder, "There is still one fly in the ointment: this place is too far away from where we work."

But the price of the rent is very friendly, and all the furniture is available, Ji Shaoting can no longer be picky: "It's nothing at all, I really want to walk more."

Sally smiled and said, "Your words are not very reliable."

"It's true," Ji Shaoting turned serious, "I promise."

How long has it been since he walked by, not breathing the free air while looking at the blue sky and white clouds.

Sally didn't understand the reason behind this, she just smiled, the kind and silly smile typical of women of this age.Her other hand was also on Ji Shaoting, and she gave a warm hug: "Anyway, welcome back Jonas, we all miss you very much."

Ji Shaoting hugged Sally tightly, and said in a low voice, "Thank you."

Ji Shaoting has a bank account in the UK, where he saves his early working savings.When there was an accident at home, he originally wanted to transfer all the money back home, but then Li Chen appeared, so Ji Shaoting has never touched the savings, and it is enough to meet his daily needs.

What's more, he went back to work again.

During the year when he was absent, their NGO handled many more cases, and some timely financial donations came in. It took Berg a whole week to roughly explain it to Ji Shaoting.

Then he told Ji Shaoting that there was one more thing he had to say.

Ji Shaoting was making dinner for himself at that time. He is the kind of person who misses hometown food as soon as he gets off the plane. Hearing that, he temporarily stopped holding the shredded radish, turned off the speaker, and put the phone back to his ear : "The tone is quite serious, what's the matter?"

"I made a boyfriend."

Ji Shaoting's voice suddenly rose, and the surprise in his heart overflowed: "Congratulations!"

"Yes," Berg's voice became very gentle, "I'll take you to meet him after a while. He's a shy Japanese boy."

It is easy to make friends from all over the world in their line of work, because everyone is brought together by enthusiasm.

Ji Shaoting promised, and after hanging up the phone, he couldn't help heaving a sigh of relief: Now he can finally get along with Berg.

It was a little embarrassing at first, but it was inevitable, rounding it up could be considered a period of time.

He was also embarrassed when asked about Li Chen, he could only lie and say that he had communicated with her husband, and finally wanted to go back to work.Sally said with a regretful face, this is a genuine long-distance relationship.

No love, Ji Shaoting thought in his heart, no.

Even if there was, it was destroyed by Li Chen, leaving nothing but ashes.

Looking at the night outside the window, Ji Shaoting stood there for a long time before returning to dinner again. After putting the meal on the table, he did what he must do every night: video chat with his family.

Ji's family members were very considerate and never mentioned Li Chen, because Ji Shaoting never asked about him.

Ji Shaoting only thought that he had died and was reincarnated again. In a world without Li Chen, Li Chen no longer existed in his life.

But I don't know why this night, without him realizing it, he suddenly heard himself asking: "How is that person?"