red dust under the lamp

The air that day was not bad, the weather was clear, and there were five or six young people under the sun, still shirtless at this time of year, squatting opposite the clinic playing poker, pumping the poker on the concrete floor with a loud voice, as if they were slapping someone.

Ning Jue walked around them and bought a pair of thick socks for the woman. The woman was lying on the bed, still looking at other people's children eagerly, making her feel sad, and turned her face to sleep. Ning Jue put the socks on the bedside, As if she were Santa Claus.

"I made an agreement with the family. I will be a nanny for 700 yuan a month, including food and lodging. I said I won't live there, and I'll come back at night. I'll try it for a few days. You don't want to make trouble if you stay here by yourself." Ning Jue reminded, a little The child was impatient, and the children around were screaming and screaming. There was a girl quietly curled up in her mother's arms and secretly watching her. Ning Jue was very good-looking and very popular with children.

When Ning Jue turned her head, the little girl looked away shyly.

The woman immediately grabbed the candy from her pocket as if she had seen something, and asked Ning Jue to pass it to the child.

Ning Jue handed it over, the child stretched out her hand shyly, her mother smiled politely, said no, we won't take it, be good, thank you sister...

The woman chimed in anxiously: "Take it, give it to the child..."

The young mother's smile disappeared, she turned her back, grabbed the little girl's trembling outstretched hand, and patted it lightly a few times as punishment: "Don't take it!"

Ning Jue peeled off the candy and put it in his mouth: "Then I'm leaving, you call Wang Da when you eat, and you pay for the extra money."

Without waiting for a response, she turned and left.

Women like children, but they seem to be unable to have children for some reason, so looking at other people's children is greedy, as if they have been hungry for a long time, and their eyes are shining.Ning Jue had inquired about it, and said that it seemed possible to do test-tube babies, but the kind of things a woman does...that kind of thing, she couldn't find any decent man who could have a baby with her.

Ning Jue was still walking on the road.

She was thinking about Xie's family, she could go to work immediately, but she shirked it, and she left it to herself for a few days, wandering the streets, and she didn't know why.

It seems to be a buffer for myself, afraid of suddenly changing my living environment and forgetting about myself immediately.

She walked from north to south on the street, using her footsteps to measure the straight-line distance between each trash can. When she stopped, she made a fortune for herself again, and told the old man that it was a career.

Regardless of whether the old man was cheating or not, Ning Jue paid five yuan for his success.Then she ended her time wandering the streets and reported to Xie's house the next day.

Ms. Xie was not there, and Secretary Zhang was usually in charge of family affairs, but he didn't appear often.Use a phone to communicate with him, the phone is on the first floor, and the other one on the second floor is connected.

In addition to Xie Yichen upstairs, there is an extra aunt who cooks and cleans up. She looks like the hard-working women who plowed the fields in the village that Ning Jue saw when she was a child.She wanted to talk to her aunt, but found that she couldn't understand the other party's speech. The other party seemed to understand some of her words, but Ning Jue couldn't see what she said. The other party could understand, and the two had little room for communication.

Ning Jue immediately regretted it. She suddenly felt that she was trapped in this big house. Ms. Xie was not here. What was the point of her being here?

She decided to leave immediately. It was her wisdom not to sign the contract. She knew that she would retreat back to her own world.

As soon as she walked to the entrance on the first floor, there was a loud bang from upstairs, as if some large object suddenly fell to the ground.

Ning Jue went upstairs, looked around, finally pushed Xie Yichen's door open, and saw her fall to the ground with her wheelchair on all fours.

Xie Yichen raised his arm to cover his face, deceiving himself. Ning Jue looked at the door for a while and saw that there was no broken glass or sharp objects on the ground. Xie Yichen could still move.

So she stood there and watched, when the light from outside came in, Ning Jue's shadow lengthened and overlapped with Xie Yichen's face.She didn't move for a while, Xie Yichen finally moved his arm: "Won't you help me?"

"I don't want to work in your house anymore, so I won't help you." Ning Jue folded her arms, her eyes were cold and indifferent, and her words didn't sound human.

Xie Yichen’s posture when he fell on the ground was not very good. He got up on his own, because it seemed that there was a problem when he moved from the bed to the wheelchair. One leg was still on the bed, and the other fell to the ground. A wheel was stuck under the bed, and Xie Yichen's hands couldn't reach it, so she was almost trapped on the ground.

"Then why don't you go?" Xie Yichen breathed out, and crossed his arms in front of his abdomen, like the opening gesture of a certain dance move.

"I heard that after I finished scolding you, you got up to eat, so I came to do something good and scold you. You eat today, so I can explain it." Ning Jue seemed to not see Xie Yichen lying on the ground. Looking embarrassed, she looked at Xie Yichen's room left and right. Her room seemed to have been pasted with many things, and now it was roughly torn off. There were some old marks of tape on the wall, and a layer of foam was wrapped around the wooden and iron furniture. It seems to be afraid that she will touch it.

"Do you think I can get up? Do you think I can still eat now?" Xie Yichen didn't look at her either. Where she was, he had to raise his head vigorously and arch his neck to see Ning Jue standing upside down. She didn't work hard, and all she could see was Ning Jue's shadow.

"It's not my business," Ning Jue still didn't plan to help her, "If you don't get up by yourself, I'll leave and I won't talk to you anymore."

"I can't get up." Xie Yichen finally sighed.

Ning Jue said, "It's difficult for you to even get into a wheelchair, and you're afraid that people will say you're useless."

"The wheelchair is stuck." Xie Yichen confessed his predicament frankly.

"There are always more ways than difficulties."

Ning Jue said a lot of sarcastic remarks, but she didn't mean to reach out.She didn't want to reach out because she was wearing a butterfly shirt today, if she reached out to grab Xie Yichen, her sleeves would be dusted by the wheelchair.And Xie Yichen didn't ask her to help her, but just said something that Ning Jue didn't like to hear.

Xie Yichen stretched out his hand and tried to reach the corner of the wheelchair. His body was pulled and twisted, and Ning Jue suddenly said, "I don't think there is anything wrong with your legs. If they are broken, they will hurt your muscles and bones for a hundred days. You shouldn't be taken away." Throw it home and ignore it."

"Get out." Xie Yichen finally issued a clear order.

Ning Jue smiled: "Okay."

She went out, closed the door, and let Xie Yichen put on various embarrassing postures in the room to try to untie herself, then she went downstairs, and a woman called Aunt Shu sat on the corner of the stool in the dining room, struggling with old newspapers. Ning Jue couldn't understand every word.

Aunt Shu opened her mouth and greeted her a few times, but she couldn't understand, and then the other party struggled to switch into broken Mandarin, Ning Jue finally understood a few words, and asked her if she wanted to eat.

Ning Jue snorted, "Yes, it's time to eat."

Aunt Shu pointed upstairs: "She... also?"

"She eats too." Ning Jue decided on her own, then put her hands on the table and waited quietly. There was no one on the long white table. She sat in the middle of the long side, as if performing the last supper alone.

Finally, there were a few louder bangs from upstairs, and to Ning Jue's ears, it was as if Xie Yichen was dismantling a wheelchair to vent his anger.Of course, Xie Yichen couldn't take it apart, he didn't have the tools, he didn't have the skills, and it wasn't necessary.Aunt Shu leaned out from the kitchen, pointing her head with great concern, Ning Jue propped her face and waved her hands: "It doesn't matter."

If she continues to take care of her like this, Xie Yichen may die at her hands.

After the voice calmed down, Ning Jue smelled the aroma of chicken. She went upstairs and opened the door again without warning. Xie Yichen was still lying on the ground as before, but his hands were spread out, and his palms were red.

Ning Jue said, "Is it impossible?"

Xie Yichen didn't speak, his eyes were closed tightly.

"If you want me to help you, just say you want me to help you. If you think I'm good and want me to take care of you, just tell me directly, don't ask me to be a nanny, I will come to see you often -"

She wanted to continue talking, but Xie Yichen interrupted her: "I thought you hated me."

"Why do I hate you."

"After you left, I thought about it for a long time, and I realized that you decided to leave because I didn't welcome you very much." Xie Yichen put his arms over his eyes again.

Ning Jue said, "Huh? What? No, I left as soon as I wanted to, so I wouldn't get angry with you. Nanny, the police are too enthusiastic..."

"Not this, I mean, in Lianhua County. You were very young."

Is it... that time?Xie Yichen remembered?

That's right, Xie Yichen should have been nine years old at that time, and his memory must be clearer than her.

But why did Xie Yichen remember it?But not Ms. Xie?

Goosebumps sprang up densely, and Ning Jue wanted to turn his head and leave, but something stuck under his feet, fixed the universe, and there was a principle between this circle. At this moment, she and Xie Yichen wanted to recall the past, confront the details, and discuss her. Why did you leave in the first place.

"I was very ignorant at the time, because not long after my mother passed away, my aunt came to adopt me, and suddenly adopted another child on the way. When I saw you, I subconsciously thought that you would take away my aunt's love, so I... "

"I have a good intuition." Ning Jue really planned to take away Ms. Xie's love arbitrarily, but it was a pity that she met Xie Yichen.

She suddenly felt ashamed.

"I just treated you very badly, and I was aggressive on purpose," Xie Yichen sighed, "My back is very cold, can you help me? I really tried my best."

Ning Jue helped him up from the bed and put him on the side of the bed. Xie Yichen sat down, pinched his legs with his hands unconsciously, and continued the topic: "Then you left, I have been thinking about you, I never thought that it would be you who saved me in the end. .”

"This is life."

"So I...was, very depressed, and even now I...can't accept the fact. But for your sake, I think, act a little easier... don't want to trouble you, didn't expect them to, directly hired you here."

Xie Yichen wanted to say something more, but Ning Jue suddenly grabbed her hand: "Don't pinch it anymore."

Xie Yichen suddenly came back to his senses: "Ah..."

Ning Jue pushed Xie Yichen down on the bed, and pulled off her pajama pants. Black and purple bruises, old and new, were pinched out on both legs, as well as some faint blue, which seemed to be pinched out before.

Xie Yichen resisted fiercely: "You—"

Ning Jue shook her head: "Look aside, it's all fate."

If Ning Jue didn't look away a little bit, she would have been bumped to death early. Her life was strange, and she committed suicide, and she came to an unseemly situation, but she gradually looked away. She believed in everything she did, and her whole body Not a single talisman is hung, but the talisman and the totem of fate are drawn with painstaking efforts in her heart.

She put her hand on the bruise and pressed it slightly, Xie Yichen said in a low voice, "I can't feel it."

Xie Yichen turned his eyes away, supported himself with his arms, his upper body was well-proportioned and smooth, and the soft cotton cloth was pressed against his back, stained with a thin layer of sweat.

She lowered her head and supported herself vigorously, first her unconscious stumbling waist, then her torso, she moved herself onto the wheelchair, and finally looked at Ning Jue at the same level: "I can take care of myself, if you want to go... Just go."

"I want to leave, I left a long time ago. It's a pity that I took 700 yuan in advance. It will take a full month to work."

Ning Jue supported the wheelchair: "It's time to eat."