red dust under the lamp

Ms. Xie traveled thousands of miles and called to greet Xie Yichen. She was concerned about her health first, and when she learned that the fever had subsided, she said a few useless words. Ning Jue picked up the phone on the first floor to listen in on the conversation between the two. Said that everyone in the dance troupe cared a lot about her and would come to visit her this Wednesday.

Xie Yichen said, "Do you want me to watch one on Saturday? To prove Li Juanjuan's ability?"

Ms. Xie said in a harsh tone, "Li Juanjuan is innocent. What people say about her is that she is a member of a dance troupe. You should also consider her situation."

Li Juanjuan was her alternate, Xiaoqing, the one who could only take off her green gauze and put on a white dress when she was not around to become a shoddy white lady.The delicate eyebrows are drawn very high, like Deng Jie's Wang Xifeng, who doesn't talk much, like Xie Yichen's shadow.

Before Xie Yichen came, she was the only existence in the dance troupe. When Xie Yichen came, the foreign monks were good at chanting scriptures, so she immediately retired as a supporting role.

There is only one protagonist in a play, and there is only one Bai Suzhen in "White Snake New Edition". When the white snake turned into a fairy, she was decisive and ruthless. She left Xu Xian and Xiaoqing, just like leaving all the supporting roles.At that time, the White Snake left the crowd and went into the clouds, all of them melted into one, their faces were blurred, the sisterhood with Xiaoqing, and the husband and wife love with Xu Xian were all left behind by her.

The group dance is indispensable, but there is only one lead dancer, and no one can be beside her.

So Li Juanjuan doesn't like Xie Yichen.

Li Juanjuan once went to give advice to her superiors, saying that Xie Yichen is always individualistic, she thinks that Xie Yichen should not be the lead dancer, Li Juanjuan is the lead dancer—this is understandable, everyone is an opponent, and they all have three points of dignity Proud, the remaining three points are the undercurrent hidden under the arrangement of Inflection, and they have a bad relationship.

Everyone knew that Xie Yichen had a car accident inexplicably, so that Li Juanjuan, who replaced him, suddenly had a bad reputation.

Did Li Juanjuan harm Xie Yichen?no.

But in this way, people say that Li Juanjuan is not as good as Xie Yichen, and that she can stand in the middle is all based on other people's misfortune.Xie Yichen is unlucky, Li Juanjuan must be secretly happy - as if Li Juanjuan expected Xie Yichen to have a car accident.

People don't know Li Juanjuan's thoughts, but everyone guesses, and they always feel that their thoughts are inseparable.

So the dance troupe contacted Ms. Xie, hoping she would persuade Xie Yichen to come and see it in person to break the rumors.Anyway, Xie Yichen can't stand up anymore, it's not as beautiful as an adult, it's better to entrust this local rising star, Li Juanjuan is not bad, not worse than her Xie Yichen, which action is not in place?Which expression is not profound?Don't spoil this "White Snake New Edition", which Ms. Xie personally organized and cared about.

"I've thought about it, and I've appeared, is she still dancing?" Xie Yichen was silent for a while, and hung up the phone gently.

Refusing to stand up for Li Juanjuan made Xie Yichen appear arrogant, unpopular, indifferent, and ungrateful.

Xie Yichen knew this, but she couldn't stand under the stage to watch another person dance on the stage, to see the white snake change his appearance, and to see her own legs disabled.

People must say that she is small-minded, there are so many dramas in the world, why is she staring at this one?

There are a lot of female dancers in China. There are many beautiful and excellent dancers like her. She has a background and a few uncles she knows, but so what?Which familiar uncle would give an opinion in full view and let a cripple take the stage?

In the final analysis, it was just because of that innocent car accident. At that time, the street was empty, and there could be four cars abreast. How could the truck squeeze behind her, and the six wheels turned, crushing her honor for the rest of her life.

The phone line curled up and trembled emptily, Xie Yichen turned away from the phone and went to the stairs to call Ning Jue.

"If you don't take the elevator, do I have to work hard?" Ning Jue said, he had already arrived downstairs, raised his face, and delayed by leaning on the brass leopard and Xie Yichen.

Xie Yichen shook hands tightly and pushed the circle, looking down at Ning Jue: "Many people came to visit me on Wednesday."

"That's a good thing." Ning Jue said nonsense, she had heard what Xie Yichen didn't like, but she couldn't care about these things, so she had to pretend to be deaf and dumb.

"I might as well die." Xie Yichen suddenly decided.

Ning Jue was downstairs, not standing dignifiedly and humbly. A dozen or so steps suddenly lengthened.

The surroundings were dark and lonely. When she propped herself up, she felt a heavy weakness from her lower limbs. She couldn't get up, and she was dragged into a more lonely darkness.It was as if she had fallen into an infinite hell, surrounded by ghosts and ghosts. She leaned forward hard, but she couldn't see anything. There was only darkness, only a silent, falling darkness...

She suddenly heard a bang, and before that, several hurried footsteps.

It wasn't herself, she opened her eyes, she was halfway up the stairs, wrapped in a polyester blended blouse, raised her head, Ning Jue was half kneeling on the stairs, supporting her, her upper body was pillowed in Ning Jue's arms, her arms were blind Grabbing across Ning Jue's back, he scratched a few strands of hair.

The second half... bumped inconsequentially.

"You called me here to perform trapeze?" Ning Jue said harshly.

Xie Yichen closed his eyes in self-deception and lost the ability to defend himself.

"If you don't want to see anyone, just tell me what you want to do in front of me. I'm not your partner, and I'm younger than you." Ning Jue didn't show any face, and picked her up to put her in a wheelchair. Neglected seat belts, sending people into elevators.

But he went directly to the top floor, the fourth-floor rooftop, and when the elevator door opened, he walked through a concrete path, and there was an empty platform with water.

Some old flower pots and withered flowers were scattered here and there, as if they hadn't been taken care of for a long time. Xie Yichen was pushed up to the edge of the top floor. Ning Jue's movements were not gentle, as if he was picking up a shovel of sand and rushing to throw it somewhere.

The ending is tossed into the air.

Ning Jue unbuckled her seat belt and pushed her to the edge of the roof. If she was not careful, she would fall down, and the pieces would turn into mud, ashes to ashes, and dust to ashes.

Xie Yichen looked downstairs.

Ning Jue started talking nonsense: "The Soviet Union is gone, people still live, what doctrines, what ideals, in the end, not only the rich live, but those who don't have money will die. If you have money, there are still people to do it." Housework, sleeping on Simmons, I have no money, I sleep on cardboard, I have never thought about death, why do you seek death every day? I can’t understand, you can demonstrate to me, what dream is ideal, since you can’t complete it, then you are martyred go."

Xie Yichen had never heard of someone persuading her like this, who could directly turn life's wishes into naught.Ning Jue's persuasion revealed a thought that it would be better to die than to live, but the words were harsh, as if she was trying to push her down directly with aggressive methods.

But what Ning Jue said was irrelevant.

All she could think about was the days ahead.

On Wednesday, those people were going to pay her a phony visit.

On Saturday, she was going to witness Li Juanjuan's life and Xie Yichen's death.

She is not reconciled.

The rest of my life will be useless, so what if I... die?

Martyrdom?What a great word.

She looked at the bottom of her feet again, half in the air, there was a thin flower bed and a lawn under the third floor, she might have fallen on the flower bed, or on the lawn, maybe half of it was separated from her head.

She moved her hands from the push circle to the armrest, and then she lightly raised her arms, pulled her feet, and moved forward from the pedals, inch by inch, her toes hovering in the air ahead of time...

The body suddenly fell backwards.

Ning Jue stepped on the wheelchair and leaned back. She lost her center of gravity and fell on the backrest. Her eyes lost focus and she was moved away.

"I'm not forcing you to die." Ning Jue's voice was weaker than before, as if he sighed, and his tone lacked force.

Xie Yichen: "There is no hope of living."

"Why do you have to dance? Didn't your aunt talk about becoming an engineer or something... change to an industry that doesn't use legs to build socialism, and you are very young, only nineteen this year." Ning Jue finally weakened completely.

Convincing Ning Jue is like fighting on the street to see who is the most ruthless, who can throw an extra brick on his head.Xie Yichen wanted to die and kept it on his lips, Ning Jue sneered, Xie Yichen took a serious step to die, like swung a piece of granite on his own head, dripping with blood, sacrificing everything.

It's the same as she inexplicably chose to get out of the car and escape, because she had a bright light in her heart.

So Ning Jue respected her even if she didn't approve.

"I don't want to dance." Xie Yichen's voice died away like the wind, Ning Jue pushed her away from the danger zone, and looked back at those withered and useless flowers.

"I just want to dance The White Lady, this version, the one my aunt choreographed..."

Xie Yichen spit out this sentence, and suddenly noticed that Ning Jue's movements stopped.

Ning Jue seemed to want to say something, but in the end there was nothing, and she stopped for a moment before pushing her down.

"Do you want to say something to me?" Xie Yichen said.

Ning Jue said, "Nothing."

Xie Yichen lost the chance Ning Jue gave her to die, his expression collapsed, as if his spine had been taken away, his face was ashen, and he forced himself to sit here so as not to wander off.

"I'm willing to kill that driver in exchange for your two legs. But it's impossible." Ning Jue said suddenly.

What is this nonsense?

"There is a grievance and a debtor. If you die, you are martyrdom. It is not good for me. I managed to get 700 yuan into the account every month. If you die, I can't even eat meat. I would rather you live a good life than a good death." Live."