back to innocence

——Is heterosexuality necessarily good?

Maybe not necessarily, but heterosexuality must be easier.

When Fei Yizhen found out that he liked boys for the first time, he was actually very scared.He knew that he was an anomaly, a pervert, and would not be recognized by the people around him, so he carefully concealed himself.

When he was older, he slowly began to understand the existence of this ethnic group.

He checked some information and learned that homosexuality was a crime decades ago. Many homosexuals in foreign countries were beaten to death and not considered a crime. In China, homosexuals were even shot to death for a certain period of time.Until more than a decade ago, people were imprisoned for being gay, charged with "hooliganism."

Religions say that God loves the world, but homosexuals are absolutely not included in this "world".The gods who love the world marked their aversion and hatred for homosexuality in various ways of death.People who died under such religious laws have no tombstones, and no records will be left, because their crimes are ambiguous.

Fei Yizhen was once at a loss: Why would a person be convicted and lose the right to live because he or she loves another and his/her existence?

This question has troubled him for many years.Even after many years, girls keep claiming to be rotten girls, and danmei seems to have become a fashion, but only people like him know that this world still consistently maintains its true colors.

Society has never smiled at this crowd.

But Fei Yizhen also knows that this is not the past after all, even if his sexuality is exposed, many people will refuse to buy his works and boycott his movies and dramas, and they have no way to directly infringe on his life safety.

He isolated himself throughout his teenage years, so he was naturally not afraid of being actively isolated—although, there would be some regrets.

As long as his parents are willing to support him and Liang Qing doesn't regret it, what has he to be afraid of?

The small theme of the class meeting every five weeks was rarely praised and welcomed, and various amazing works appeared.Cross-stitch, sand painting, clay models... Although they are not technically brilliant, it is rare that they are meticulous enough.

The group that Fei Yizhen and Liang Qing joined made a relatively simple class webpage. Except for a few members who had HTML foundation, most of the rest learned it step by step from reference books.The built webpage is a bit rudimentary, but it has the basic functions of the webpage, and the database is hung on the computer of the school.

As time passed, Fei Yizhen's album also slowly spread.

The promotion of the album is actually quite a difficult process.When Times Media released "Graduation Ceremony", there was no hype.Although the lack of publicity expenses is also a reason, the confidentiality agreement signed between Fang Menglou and Fei Yizhen is also a reason.

Of course, Fei Yizhen was not so pretentious that he had to release the album anonymously, so the name of the singer of the album was still "Chonghua".He just asked not to use the teenage writer's name too much for hype.

Fang Menglou considered that Fei Yizhen was also unwilling to participate in various promotional programs. If he used this name, the debate between true and false might be raging again. The works are distributed directly.

Companies like Times generally have some distribution quotas, which are used when the company releases some old discs or albums that are not very popular.Some merchants will regularly put in some recommended discs, the number will not be many, but they can build a good relationship with upper-level marketers.

Fang Menglou used this line.

The album "Graduation Ceremony" is of excellent quality.However, due to various reasons, the packaging and publicity seem a bit too monotonous.So when they first received this batch of goods, most of the shops didn't pay much attention to the blue-covered album.

Some video stores have a habit of playing some popular tracks on a loop. In a large video store in downtown T, a clerk saw such a disc that had been on the shelf for a long time out of the corner of his eye when he opened the store in the morning, and inserted it into the optical drive on a whim.

The musical prelude of the first song is quite pleasant, but a little strange.But when the singer's singing sounded, another clerk who was arranging the display rack was stunned.

He was stunned for a long time, all he knew was that he had never heard this song before, and he had no idea who the singer was, but the moment he heard the song, he thought it was very pleasant.

He immediately turned his head and asked, "Whose song is this? Which new singer!?"

The clerk who played the song before was also very surprised, and said: "I don't know either. The singer's name says 'Chong Hua', which is the "Graduation Ceremony" that was placed over there before. It has been in stock for almost two weeks, and no one has yet I bought it."

"How is it possible!?" The male clerk was suddenly very surprised, "I have never heard this song before. This song is so good, why is there no publicity and no one buys it?"

The female clerk was also very surprised, and said, "It's still released by Times Video."

The two of them listened there for a while, and found that several songs in succession were very nice. The singer's voice was simply amazing, the voice of nature.

The male clerk said, "We're going to play this today! You bring that stack of music discs over here."

The female clerk immediately went to bring over a stack of song discs, but the male clerk casually pulled one out from the top and stuffed it into a plastic bag.

The girl was shocked immediately: "What are you doing?"

The male clerk smiled at her, took out another bag and put it next to her handbag, made a "shh" gesture, then took the album from her hand, and placed it on the shelf recommended by the best sellers. Said: "Okay. Such a nice CD has not been sold for two weeks, it's a waste of money."

Only then did the girl realize what he meant, stuck out her tongue, stuffed the money for the album into the cash register, and then knelt down to put the album into her bag.

Sure enough, on this day, with the sound of music drifting past, people kept coming in and asking whose song was playing.A mere dozen sets of song discs were sold out before ten o'clock.

After the last disc was sold out, several girls came in and asked, "What song are you playing? We want to buy this album."

The female clerk was stunned for a moment, and then said: "But we only have unpacked ones here..."

Then she was interrupted by the male clerk, who smiled and said, "I'm sorry that this song disc here is sold out, but a new batch will arrive in a few days. Would you like to come back and see it later?" ?”

The girls were immediately disappointed, and one of them asked, "When will it be available? And whose song is this song? Which new singer?"

"It's "Graduation Ceremony" by Chonghua, and the song that's being broadcast now is called "Ten Years."

The girl asked, "Which Chonghua?"

"I don't know. Maybe it's just some singer who happens to have the same name."

"Then when will you have the goods? Will we have them when we come back to you the day after tomorrow?"

The male clerk said, "Why don't you leave a phone number? We'll send you a text message when it's in stock."

The girls looked at each other in blank dismay, and one of them left her mobile phone number, telling her to notify her as soon as it was in stock.

After the girls left, the female clerk asked in confusion, "Don't we still have the music discs in the drive?"

The male clerk said: "Just wait, there will be more people asking about this song today... I'll make a phone call first to place an order."

The same story is happening in many other places.

There are also confused bosses who don't know what kind of album "Graduation Ceremony" is. Seeing someone come to ask about the album that no one cares about, they happily pack it up. They didn't realize it until the last one was sold out. The CD might be on fire.

Then he didn't know how popular the album would be until the next batch of discs came in.

Fei Yizhen received the call, and after listening to what the other party said, he laughed: "Isn't the record selling well?"

Fang Menglou was suddenly surprised, and said, "Why don't you look surprised at all? Now the factory is rushing to release discs, but it is still far from keeping up with the number of orders. Several batches have been reprinted, and I haven't watched it yet." Now that the craze subsides, why aren't you excited at all?"

Fei Yizhen said: "Brother Fang, it's a lie to say you're unhappy. But, have you forgotten where I am? Fashion trends and so on, nowhere can appear faster than schools. "Graduation Ceremony" just When I came out, some classmates came to me with song discs and asked me if the Chong Hua on it was me. Now the whole school can hear "friend/Where will you be in ten years/Will you still have the same smile/Is there any Fulfilling the ideals of the past / and the vow to meet again...'" He hummed softly into the phone, which just blended with the music on the school radio, and then smiled, "I know the album better than you It's red."

Fang Menglou laughed suddenly: "How does it feel to hear your own songs around your ears all the time?"

Fei Yizhen smiled, and said with a little pride: "Brother Fang, you have to know. I can listen to the scene anytime, anywhere."

Fang Menglou was speechless.

Self-singing and self-appreciation, can you listen to the scene anytime, anywhere?

Fei Yizhen hummed softly and typed, then Liang Qing suddenly took off his earphones behind his back and said, "Yizhen, I have received a new movie."

Fei Yizhen raised his head and asked, "What movie?"

Liang Qing handed him the script.

Fei Yizhen took the script, opened it to read it, and then froze.

The title of the play is called "Yu Guan Lou".

This is not a TV series, this is a movie.

Fei Yi really remembered this movie.

Yuguanlou talks about the grievances and resentments of a jewelry family in the period of national hatred and family hatred during the period when the old dynasty disappeared more than 100 years ago.This movie was later made into a TV series. The hero in the TV series version was played by a very famous actor of the new generation. The image is very classic, and it can be said that it is popular all over the country.

Of course, this movie is also very classic.

Fei Yizhen didn't read the script, but asked Liang Qing: "Who are you playing?"

Liang Qing replied, "I will play Yu Huiqing."

He was the youngest of the three brothers of the Yu family. His biological mother was unknown and he was very withdrawn and withdrawn. He disappeared in an accident, which directly caused his cousin Yu Mengxiang to go crazy—and his real identity was Yu Mengxiang and her uncle. The illegitimate child born.Yu Huiqing's disappearance is as secretive as his origin. Some people say that he voted for the revolution, some say that he was killed, and some say that he just ran away.

There is no sequel in the movie, but he appeared in the later TV series more than ten years later, when he had already become an official of the new government.

It's a very deep character.

Fei Yizhen said: "The role of Yu Huiqing is not easy to play."

Liang Qing was quite surprised: "Have you read the script?"

"I haven't read it. But I have read the original novel, Yan Wenxin's "Yuguanlou" is very famous." Fei Yizhen said with a little emotion, ""Yuguanlou", "Rebirth", "Furong Hairpin" ...they are all excellent works, the kind of novels with the unique prosperity and decay of the times, it is difficult for people of our generation to write that feeling."

Liang Qing shrugged: "My agent also said that this movie is very good. I read it and found the script very interesting and challenging, which made my blood boil a little bit. Don't you read the script?"

Fei Yizhen said, "Well, let me take a look first."

It is a rare opportunity to see the original script of "Yu Guan Lou".

The first protagonist in the story "Yu Guan Lou" is of course not Yu Huiqing, but Yu Zhiqing, the 23-year-old young master of the Yu family.The whole story unfolds from a love story between Yu Zhiqing and Su Maner, a new school girl student.The beginning of the story tells about the rumor that the Yu family has a Hetian jade pendant that is said to hide the secret of the treasure of the previous dynasty. In order to obtain the secret of the treasure, the Japanese army sent a female spy dressed as a schoolgirl to contact Yu Zhiqing.Su Man'er is actually a spy who was adopted and raised by the Japanese army at the age of eight or nine, but she played the image of a patriotic female student. In the process of getting in touch with Yu Zhiqing, her national consciousness was constantly called out, and for Self-awareness has been shaken.

In the end, Su Maner's identity was revealed. During the theft of the jade pendant, Su Man'er was shot and killed by Yu Zhiqing himself. Yu Zhiqing also grew up from a wandering rich young master to a later new-style businessman.

In "Yuguanlou", everyone's personality is very complicated.Su Man'er was originally the daughter of an ordinary family, and her parents were killed by the Japanese army.After escaping, she was caught and traded while wandering, and finally sold to a Japanese officer.The harsh training of the Japanese army distorted her heart, but in the process of playing the new schoolgirl, her national consciousness and hatred for the invaders were reawakened.

Su Man'er's death prompted Yu Zhiqing to mature.

The complicated and ambiguous secrets of the Yu family, Su Man'er's human struggle in national hatred, Yu Zhiqing's disgust for the old era and her expectation for the Utopia finally constitute this "Yu Guan Lou".

Fei Yizhen read the script, read about Yu Huiqing's disappearance, finally put the script down, and said: "I also think this is a good role. Ah Qing, have you decided to play it yet?"

Liang Qing said: "After reading the script, I want to act more. But I still want to hear your opinion before making a final decision. But since you have agreed, I will definitely continue."

Fei Yizhen said: "The role of Yu Huiqing is very interesting."

Liang Qing smiled and said, "I think so too."

Then he paused and said, "It's just that, I'm going to ask for leave."

So when the filming of "Yuguanlou" started, Liang Qing asked for leave and went to other places.

After several months passed, the relationship between Fei Yizhen and Mo Yao gradually became familiar.Although the two people are of different genders, they may be born with the fate of friends, and there are many topics that can be discussed together.

Although it is impossible for the relationship to be as close as it was in the past ten years, Fei Yizhen is quite satisfied.

After coming and going, there were rumors in the class that Fei Yizhen had a crush on Mo Yao.

For such rumors, Fei Yizhen always laughed it off.Leaving aside that he only likes boys, people in this world are always unwilling to believe that there can be pure friendship between men and women, but in fact, Mo Yao and Fei Yizhen have always been close to each other from previous lives to this life. Friends who can make friends.This kind of tacit understanding cannot be defined by mere words of liking.

In the past, Mo Yao was hostile by many girls because of this kind of friendship that surpassed that between men and women, which made Fei Yi really feel guilty for her.But Mo Yao is open-minded, and never alienated him because of such things.

Fei Yi really wanted to cherish this friendship.

As a result, Fei Yizhen was blocked in the corridor by several girls that day, forcing him to ask: "Fei Yizhen, do you like Mo Yao?"

Fei Yizhen was quite impatient with such questions, so his tone was not as gentle as usual, and he looked a little cold, and asked, "Does it have anything to do with you?"

Seeing that his complexion was not good, those girls were a little timid and pushed each other. After a while, one of them said, "Someone wants to chase her, let's ask."

Fei Yizhen looked at the girls from head to toe, and then from foot to head, and found that they were students in the same class.His eyes only looked at the girls until their faces turned red, and then Fei Yi really realized that they were lying.

If you like Mo Yao's boy, of course it's more convenient to ask him yourself, why would you ask a few girls?

It's hard for them to be quick-witted.

Fei Yizhen originally wanted to expose them, but after thinking about it for a while, he suddenly remembered what happened when Mo Yao was rejected by others, and suddenly changed his words: "I just talk to her, as naturally and comfortable as talking to boys. Don't you Talking nonsense."

The girls listened and asked, "Really?"

"real."

Then Fei Yizhen didn't wait for their reaction, passed the three of them and walked towards the classroom.

As a result, I saw a girl in front of me turned around and ran away.

He froze for a moment.

Back in the classroom, Mo Yao was reading a book.Fei Yizhen looked at her back and reached out to pat her shoulder, but Mo Yao ignored him.

Fei Yizhen called out: "Hello? Mo Yao?"

But Mo Yao turned her head, waited for him with a look that was about to cry, and then turned back.

she cried?

Fei Yi was really stunned.

He was stunned for a while, but instead of harassing Mo Yao, he covered half of his face with a book.

The running figure turned out to be Mo Yao.

But why did Mo Yao cry?

They have always been good friends, but even before knowing that Fei Yi is really gay, Mo Yao never showed affection for him between men and women, they have always been a very pure friendship...

...isn't it?

It turned out that the first time they became acquainted, it was Mo Yao who took the initiative to talk to him.

At that time, he was very withdrawn and indifferent, and he didn't have a good relationship with the boys or girls in the class.Although some girls would fall in love with him because of his good looks, they would soon be scared away by his indifference.

But only Mo Yao, although he doesn't talk often, always maintains a certain tacit understanding with him.They are in the same group, sometimes they will be separated together when they are on duty, and Mo Yao will chat with him casually, although sometimes he will reply with "um" "um" "ah" " Ah", but Mo Yao will not be angry because of his indifference like many girls.

Then one day, Mo Yao saw his painting book, and exclaimed that he painted so beautifully.

At that time, he was feeling restless and depressed because of the growing gap with Ye Minghe, when he heard Mo Yao's praise, he tore up the drawing book on the spot and threw it on Mo Yao.

Mo Yao was so startled by him that he didn't even dare to move, but he suddenly felt very happy.He knew it was wrong to vent his anger, and knew that Mo Yao was innocent, but he just felt very happy.

Then he walks away.

Afterwards, Mo Yao never spoke to him again.

After about two months like that, he was on duty again. Looking at the silent Mo Yao, he always felt very guilty, so he couldn't help talking to her and apologized.

Mo Yao shook her head and said "It's okay".

Later, they gradually started talking, and their relationship became better.The two discovered that their hobbies overlapped a lot.When Mo Yao accidentally found out that he was gay, she didn't find it annoying, and comforted him by saying that there was no difference between liking the same sex or the opposite sex.

However, how could such a Mo Yao like him?

Fei Yi really remembered the conversation he had with Mo Yao when they left the hotel.

——Why didn’t I rush forward and confess to the prettiest boy in school when I was 16?

—I thought I was the prettiest boy in school when you were sixteen.

He discovered that he might have been mistaken about something.

Mo Yao said: "Sooner or later, I will have my own wedding." "Oh? With whom?" "It must not be with you."

What kind of mood did she have when she said this?

She asked Fei Yizhen: Who will you be with in the future?

She said: Do you regret it?

She said: I suddenly regret it now.

She said: If this is the case, Fei Yizhen, your heart is too cruel.

She said: You have to be brave.

What kind of mood is she saying these words?

Fei Yi really felt that he was a scumbag.

Only then did he realize how big a mistake he had made.

If he knew about this earlier... How could he provoke her again?