The day when I was one soul with Dazai

Hearing XANXUS's remarks, Sawada Iemitsu felt something was wrong in his heart. He seemed to want to expel this referee from the government.

However, looking at XANXUS's irritable face, Sawada Iemitsu relaxed his vigilance a bit.

He looked at the figure of Dazai Osamu, thought carefully, and thought of the group of old-fashioned and irritable young people who supported XANXUS.Such involvement is not a good thing for Gang Ji.

Immediately afterwards, after proposing the terms of exchange, the Ability Secret Service Division replaced a 'supervisor' member to observe the whole process of the battle.

Dazai Osamu, who returned to the underground and continued to work, found Oda Tsukuru who had been working as a security guard.

When Dazai Osamu found him, the red-haired man was talking to the children in Rantang's foster care. Hearing the children's miss for him, Odasaku felt the sense of peace of his old father.Sensing the familiar footsteps, the black pupils dilated slightly.

After quickly finishing the daily phone calls with the children, Odasaku came to Osamu Dazai who was casually leaning against the door.

"Dazai, do you want to eat together?"

Looking at the still natural Oda, Osamu Dazai bent his eyebrows silently, looking at the bright red on the table:

"Then it's better to obey than to be respectful!"

Sitting face to face on the tatami mat, watching the spare bowls and chopsticks carefully put some into the bowl, and then put it in front of the eyes, and then admired the expressionless sweating of Oda Saku while eating big mouthfuls The appearance of spicy curry.

Following Osamu Dazai's gaze, Odasaku stopped hesitantly, looked at Osamu Dazai suspiciously, and then looked at the bowl:

"Is it too spicy?"

As he said that, without waiting for Dazai Osamu's answer, he turned around and took out white rice from the rice cooker behind him, and covered the rice to express his intention of neutralization.

Seeing the bowl full of rice, Osamu Dazai ate it all out of face, but the scene of crying while eating made people laugh.

Shuji Tsushima, who was awakened by the heat, had red and swollen lips and tears in his eyes, which made people feel maternity.However, in this community animal gathering place, for the time being, there is only a glass of water handed over by the old father's upper body, Oda Saku.

"Dazai is not happy!"

Shuji Tsushima was a little confused by Odasaku's sudden words, but the meaning was still clearly understood.

Recalling his recent interaction with Dazai, Tsushima suddenly found that they had become unfamiliar.Maybe it was because I was busy writing and ignored Dazai; maybe I realized that I was not that important; maybe it was just because of that!

Birth, old age, sickness and death, love parting, can't ask for it.

Dazai sees the eight sufferings of life so thoroughly that he always prepares early for the departure of others, so as to save his sensitive heart from being dragged into the abyss.

He always dreamed of being abandoned, and then left others before others, so that only death gave him a deep sense of security.

Through the fact that Liu Dao Mu set up a barrier for his own soul, Osamu Dazai saw through everything that might happen in the future.I also expected the progress of that matter.So much so that he turned himself into a closed door again, and now he is standing in the middle of the city wall and the door.It was the one who accidentally lost the key.

"Dazai, he's still a child!"

Odasaku looked at Shuji Tsushima's pensive expression, and sighed as he thought about his past relationship with Dazai.

Shuji Tsushima nodded silently when he heard Odasaku's words, affirming Odasaku's thoughts.

Wasn't Dazai, who was locked behind the door, a child who lost his temper with his parents, but didn't want to tell the reason for his anger, just sulking alone? !If you don't comfort him, then you will lose his trust forever.

Shuji Tsushima, who was thinking about how he should explain his snubbing behavior to Dazai, was pushed offline by Osamu Dazai, who was listening to their entire conversation.

Seeing Dazai Osamu who looked at him angrily, Odasaku blinked innocently, and asked naturally:

"Dazai, are you angry again?"

"Not angry!"

Looking at Dazai who was very unhappy written all over his face, Odasaku was thoughtful, looking forward to Odasaku's words, Dazai inadvertently focused his listening on Odasaku:

"So Dazai is acting like a baby?"

Blinking his iris-colored eyes quickly, Osamu Dazai looked at Odasaku who spoke amazingly, and immediately lost his temper.

"Odasaku, why do you think I'm acting like a baby?"

Sensing that Osamu Dazai's anger dissipated, Odasaku stared at Osamu Dazai seriously with his black eyes, and frowned:

"Because Dazai just followed me, Sakule got the hair tie I bought for her, and was very happy, but the color is her expression when she doesn't like it."

Looking at Odasaku who answered his own question seriously, Dazai Osamu was defeated, what, Odasaku still treats himself as a child.Obviously not much older than me!

"Don't you like Tsushima?"

The straightforward words pried out a crack in Dazai Osamu's shell-like heart, and subtle emotions flashed in his kite-colored eyes, but Dazai Osamu did not speak.

"If you don't like it, you have to say it outright. If you don't say it, some people will never understand it."

Do you hate Tsushima?

Osamu Dazai thought he shouldn't hate it, who would hate an existence who is always considerate?From Tsushima to his own body unintentionally, he is obviously just a timid writer, but forcibly endures the life of the mafia for himself and helps him to build a good relationship with his colleagues.

Even accepting the threat of life for himself, the attitude of giving completely, sincerely burned Dazai Osamu's heart like a flame.It was terrible, and when Osamu Dazai realized that he had inadvertently let Tsushima invade to that extent, he was terrified.

His willfulness, everything about him, is contained, but first, the appearance of Ryunosuke Akutagawa, and then the desire for writing, followed by the news from Pengo Lie.All shattered that beautiful dream that seemed to be a fantasy.

What is gained will always be lost, that is something he learned in that family!

He is very much like Jin Dao having a big fight with himself, venting some of his emotions, but Jin Dao has always been indifferent, like white water, and like air, that different world, and the fact that Jin Dao is dead, always It makes people feel that they can't grasp anything!

Dazai knew that he was just a coward. He was afraid that good intentions outweighed malicious intentions. Evil without reason is a real human heart, but love without reason is like a cloud in the sky that blows away.

How could Tsushima not understand what Dazai was worried about?After all, Dazai is another self.They are like people inside and outside the mirror, extremely similar, but very different.

Tsushima's outlook on life comes from the family atmosphere when he was young, the knowledge he was exposed to in school, and the impact of war when he was young.

He witnessed everything and experienced everything, so he made himself who would hide in bed and cry.

But he wants to make himself beautiful, or he wants to let him know that there are beautiful things in this world.Don't be afraid of getting hurt, because there will always be someone waiting for you with open arms behind you, so you can express your grievances to your heart's content, and don't bear it silently.

However, in the face of misfortune, there is a lack of ability to refuse.Afraid of rejecting others, it will leave a rift that will never heal in each other's hearts (1), such a Dazai, chooses to stay away from a person's existence even more decisively.He will only become permanently silent, and then let you retreat.

Tsushima and Dazai did not follow Oda Saku's suggestion to have an in-depth conversation, because the moment they spoke, they would know that the cooling atmosphere was a revelation that they would never go back.

They tacitly did their things step by step, pretending that the estrangement never happened.It's just that Osamu Dazai is no longer as sluggish in the face of work as before, but has become more serious than ever before.Tsushima kept revising his manuscript, turning his thoughts into pen and ink, waiting for the day when it would be revealed.

Time was going at its own pace, and it had been a year since he entered the underground office, which also meant Odasaku's departure.

The red-haired man who was worried about Dazai came to Dazai's dormitory silently with a bottle of wine on the day he left, and stayed in this dormitory silently until midnight, and then left silently, all words were left behind. In the words.

In the days when there was not even a single acquaintance to talk to, only the manuscripts of the inner world maintained Osamu Dazai's nostalgia for this world.

He watched the knife named Sanriyue Zongjin being born in Tsushima's book, through which he witnessed history, betrayal and loyalty, love and resentment, life and death, all in that unspeakable sword There are deep traces on the knife, and it is polished to a peerless elegance.

There were no words, but Dazai saw what Tsushima wanted to become. He lowered his eyes, sat on the chair in his inner world, and tasted the joy and coldness of loneliness under the dim light.

The paper flipped slightly, turned to the last page, and looked at the only sentence on that paper.

Well, tangible things perish, and I just happen to be here today. (2)

At that moment, Dazai felt an indescribable shock in his heart. He saw the transparency and openness in a knife, as well as the enviable freedom.He is really living himself!

After closing the book, Dazai looked at the handwriting pasted on the last post-it note of the book, and at that moment, he was completely coaxed.

'That's the way I want you to live, but I want you to be you and never need to change. '

'If you are worried about my leaving, then let's leave together when the time comes! '

'Maybe I'm too stupid, so I always want to sacrifice myself to help others, but I believe you will always have a better way!I will learn to depend on you, and you don't have to keep silent all the time. '

The boy with kite eyes was filled with a pleasant atmosphere, he took the post-it note on the desk, took a pen and left his answer.