How to face the past calmly

He's a human being who makes mistakes, and he's affected by a lot of things.

"It's nothing, it's just that I suddenly realized that I was an idiot before." Voldemort felt that he finally understood why he used to feel that Alphard seemed to have no feelings for him when he was dancing, because he was too nervous and cared too much about the other party's feelings for him. If you understand each other, it is difficult to find the other party's emotions.

"Oh, I already know that you are really an idiot if you can like me who is such a bastard in the future."

"I can't argue with that, strong testimony." Voldemort retorted.

Sirius and James on the side of the corridor were completely dumbfounded in place. They followed up because they were worried that Alphard and Voldemort would be alone, but they didn't expect to see the two of them dancing happily together.

"I think maybe the direction of our concern should not be whether Voldemort will be unfavorable to Al, but whether he will be too kind to Al. To be honest, you must never hit me. I always feel that if this continues, you The grandparents' family will have no children and grandchildren, and you will have an extra Dark Lord aunt, or uncle." James whispered to Sirius.

The soul-like Sirius said, sorry, the user you called is not in the service area, please restart later.

"Hey, gentlemen, are you enjoying the eavesdropping?" The blond Lawrence suddenly appeared behind Sirius and James.

"!!!"

"Sirius, when you meet your great-grandmother's nephew and grandfather's cousin, you really don't plan to say anything?" Lawrence continued, looking at Sirius who was obviously shocked.

"Long time no see, Grandpa Laurie." Sirius finally found his voice, and the roar in his heart finally changed from the adultery between Alphard and the Dark Lord to the bitterness of his seniority. Why is his seniority so low?James is the younger uncle, Alphard is the uncle, and this one here is directly a grandfather!

"Hey~" Lawrence smiled contentedly, and handed some Galleons to Sirius, "Pocket money. Alright, let's go and play after collecting the money, and be careful not to let anyone approach this place like the two of you."

After Sirius and James left, Liszt said, "Is it my illusion, or is their combination somewhat familiar?"

"The déjà vu of Lucretia and Walburga." Lawrence immediately found the answer.

"bingo."

"Why do you want to dress like this?" Voldemort asked Alphard a new question in the corridor.

"Because I have a transvestite?" Alphard asked deliberately.

"Although I've known you for several years, I really didn't know you had this hobby." Voldemort smirked, "You promised me not to lie to me."

"Oh my god, can't you really even keep some little secrets for me?!" Alphard complained, what else could he do for dressing like this, but he wanted to catch the big fish of the Dark Lord, but very Obviously, these words must never be said, and now he has regretted the feeling of being so eager for quick success.

"I'm even more curious about this little secret now. If you didn't tell me, I would think that you deliberately lost to Laurie so that you could wear women's clothes."

"Walburga's punishment." Alphard told part of the truth.

"What did you do to piss her off?" Voldemort asked with a smile. He guessed that it was almost the same. When he was in school, Alphard would always try to die in front of Walburga, and then he was killed by Walburga. Plus really kills.

Alphard looked at Voldemort: "Can I keep this little secret?"

"You know the rules, Al."

"I told Walburga that I recalled that I kissed Liszt." Alphard didn't know why he said that, but that's what he said. At that time, he always felt that he needed something urgently. To break the increasingly weird atmosphere between him and Voldemort, and then he screwed everything up.

With the sound of the wine glass falling to the ground, Voldemort, Alphard, Lawrence, and Liszt finally met their eyes, and the atmosphere was awkward, while Liszt had a puddle of liquid that was more dazzling than blood and glass shards in front of him.

Chapter 31 The World's No.30 One Malice: The Legendary Nozuonodiewhystilltry

Humans are a very complicated animal. There are always some weird psychological problems that will make you feel why the other party is so overwhelmed, such as autism and self-abuse. The self-destructive emotions of screwing up that thing.

Most of the time, the psychiatrist will tell the patient that there are roughly two reasons why you have this kind of situation. Start to find reasons for yourself desperately, and keep implying to yourself that you messed up on purpose, not that you really can’t do well; second, you feel that you shouldn’t have this kind of beauty, you don’t deserve it, you just can’t get it, If you do get it, you screw it up too.

Alphard didn't know which one he was, all he knew was that in his relationship with Voldemort, he had to be reunited with Voldemort or he would die, and he didn't want to die.

But he would always say things that were easy to mess things up, blowing their hard-earned relationship to pieces again.

Like this moment.

Voldemort's description of "the whole person is not well" is really appropriate.

Lawrence, on the other hand, condemned Alphard. Although he didn't say a word, he used his eyes to express a particularly long line of emotion-"Why do you have to pull me on your back if you want to kill yourself! What a hatred!" ?!!"

Liszt... Liszt has no expression, his brain is like a broken wine glass on the ground, a mess.

"Uh, any question?" Alphard felt that he was probably really sick, suffering from a mental illness called feeling unhappy until he was killed by the Dark Lord.Not only did he bravely break the silence, but he also pulled the only three pairs of eyes and hatred points left in the audience to himself.

Congratulations to the player Alphard for achieving the achievement of the little master of death, huh?Alphard laughed to himself inwardly.

"What gave you the courage to confess to me what you said just now?" Voldemort said this calmly, without irony at all, he really began to admire this amnesiac version of Alphard, so embarrassing death and fearlessness.But it was also through this incident that Voldemort began to really believe Alphard's promise that he would never lie to him again.Of course, there are some truths that he thinks he should suggest to the other party to think about it in the future.

"It was an oolong. We didn't mean to kiss at the time, but we just met like that. We were surprised afterwards." Liszt's first sentence made everyone understand that his ability to kill was not lost at all. in Alphard.

"Did I ask you to talk? Did I ask you?!" Voldemort finally broke out, "What's the matter with you!"

In fact, many years ago, Voldemort wanted to tell Liszt that.It’s like when Liszt transferred to Hogwarts and saw Alphard for the first time and said that you are beautiful like a painting; it’s also like when Liszt got involved in his relationship with Alphard; When the green hat on the head.

What's up between me and Al with you Lister Greengrass!

Liszt took a deep breath, didn't even look at Alphard, just looked at Voldemort and said bluntly: "I think there is really something about me in it."

"=口="← This is the expression of Lawrence and Alphard at this moment.

"You, are, say, one, time." Voldemort's strong magic pressure quickly swept across the entire corridor, making people feel like their waists are not straight for a moment.

"Liszt!" Lawrence was the first to save Liszt from the furious Voldemort. Regardless of his physical discomfort, he yelled at Liszt, "Do you know what you are talking about?! It's not just our lord, it's our Lord." Classmates for seven years, best friends for life! For a man who has been playing between the two of you for so many years, what are you doing?!"

Alphard always felt that Lawrence was not only asking Liszt, but also Voldemort, and he was lying innocently, and no one asked him if he would like to be that male vixen.

And Voldemort was also stunned by Lawrence's question. In fact, even he himself didn't know whether he was more angry with Liszt, or more angry with himself for not living up to expectations.He keeps asking himself, what is he doing? He is already an adult in his 40s, but at this moment he is like a stupefied young man still in school, and he feels ashamed for himself, But even so, he still didn't want this to end like this, there can only be one life between him and Liszt!

"Not at all." Liszt saved himself with this sentence, but the reason why he said this was not because he sensed Voldemort's killing intent, but because it was from his heart, "It's not at all."

Lawrence looked at Alphard triumphantly.

Alphard looked innocent, don't look at me, I'm just a soy saucer, and I didn't even know that Liszt actually liked me and didn't intend to kill me on purpose, so it doesn't matter what he said .In fact, if you continue this afternoon, I will think that you actually like Liszt.

Voldemort looked at Liszt with an unclear expression, crossed his chest and said, "goon."

"There is one thing, I wanted to explain it to you many years ago, but for various reasons...you understand. Today I just said everything. What you saw outside the door at that time was all fake, you misunderstood , the kiss between me and Al was an oolong, literally an oolong. If you recall carefully, did you see us go deep? No! Because it was really just an accidental encounter, I hug He was just reassuring him, and then I put my head down when he looked up. There was really nothing between us, from beginning to end, if you know what I mean."

"No, Alphard has already admitted it, cough..." Lawrence thoughtfully asked the question that Voldemort wanted to ask but didn't because of face.

Liszt took a deep look at Alphard: "I also don't know why he would admit it smoothly when you came in and questioned the relationship between Al and me. You didn't even give me a chance to explain, so you just put I cursed St. Mungo's, and my life is hanging by a thread. But I always want to tell you, Tom Riddle, I am a scumbag emotionally, but I also have principles, and there are certain things I will never do!"

For example, when the other party doesn't like me, I won't try to pry the corner of the wall out of humiliation.

Or do you think that when I first transferred to Hogwarts in the third year, I expressed a little ambiguous tendency towards Alphard, why did I stop so quickly?Because I realized that I can't get involved in your and his world at all!

But things like feelings, if they can be controlled, it’s not called feelings.

That's why later on Liszt couldn't suppress his feelings and wanted to get close to Alphard, but on the other hand, he only got along with Alphard as a friend.

Until Alphard returns after ten years of disappearance...

Of course, the reason Liszt is smarter than Alphard is that there are some truths that he will only keep in his heart.

"Wait, which time are you talking about?" Lawrence was a little confused. He always thought that Alphard used Liszt to betray Voldemort together, but now it doesn't sound like that at all.

"After Al disappeared for ten years and came back, you went to Al's temporary apartment, and you brought a bottle of red wine, remember?" Liszt replied to Lawrence, "Al was sleeping, so you said you left early ,after……"

"!!!" Lawrence once again used his magical ability to express long sentences with his eyes, [How dare you have so many fucking things happen when I'm no longer here!Can we still be friends!Holy crap, if I'd stayed... the Sith was empty! ] "So that was an oolong?" Voldemort now felt that this oolong was even more unacceptable to him than what Alphard and Liszt really had.He means, if it was an oolong, then what the hell has he struggled with all these years?Wasting time? ! "Why did Al deliberately mislead me at that time?"

The three of them looked at the shortest Alphard together.

"Don't look at me, I'm also shocked, I also want to know why, the amount of information is too much," Alphard, who is tall in the second grade, said he was really helpless.

"After so much just now, you don't have any memories at all?" After spending so many nights with Alphard, Voldemort has basically figured out how Alphard remembers the past, as long as he starts, he can always extend If he comes up with something, such as the knowledge he has learned in class, he can remember it and use it flexibly when he mentions it.But why is it suddenly not working now?Because it's been too long?That's not right, didn't Alphard recall that he and Liszt had their lips touched?

"I only occasionally saw Liszt and me in the clip, uh, skin to skin, I didn't even know you appeared behind." Alphard replied truthfully, his appetite was also whetted, okay?The feeling of suddenly stopping the broadcast at this critical moment is simply unbearable!

"Then what should we do now?" Liszt asked, and the clue was cut off.

"I think we should take a break tonight. After all, we drank some wine at the dance, and our minds are not clear enough. When we calm down tomorrow, we can sort out our thoughts and find out the reason, OK? Especially Al, try to recall , if you can recall the fragments, you will be able to remember the beginning and the end! This is a matter of many people and many things, you must work hard!" Lawrence, as the only party who was barely considered a party, said what was clear to the onlookers.

The four finally adopted the proposal unanimously.

On the way back to Liszt's office, Lawrence asked him: "So, you frequently want to lock Al up, and you really just want to get revenge on him?"

"If one day I deliberately injured you and lived in St. Mungo's for almost a year, but ran to France without an explanation, do you want to take revenge on me?" Liszt asked back.

"You will die in an ugly way!" Lawrence promised Liszt with a serious face, "I'm serious, if this relationship still doesn't end well and gets involved, I will definitely kill you and Liszt." Al's."

"Al, huh?" Liszt glanced at Lawrence playfully.

"If it's really just a misunderstanding between you and him, I can still forgive him. No matter how many people he finds outside, it's a relationship between him and the lord. The only thing I can't tolerate is that he put us five Personal relationships are messed up, like Walburga and Lucretia. I mean, they used to be so good, and 14 years of friendship ended up being a specious love? That's bullshit, I can't accept it !"

"I remember that the culprit between them seems to be Lord?"

"It's not a lord, but a specious love. Without a lord, there will be others." Lawrence insisted. It's not because the Dark Lord is his master that he doesn't help his family, but because he despises the most in his life. It's love, "Love? How much is love worth!"

Liszt smiled and hummed a French opera: "What is love and what is meaning? It's not that everyone deceives themselves. What is obsession and what is obsession..."

"It's just a man and a woman playing a show!" Lawrence hummed along with Liszt.

After singing, the two adults in their forties laughed together like two big boys.The reason why their relationship is so good in the five-person group is that they discovered that they both like this French opera.

"My father and my aunt had an affair in the opera house. When I found out, they sang this opera, the annual drama."

"My mother is also the same. She always prefers to choose the opera house when she cheats on her. When the background music is this opera, I think it's very ironic."

In my memory, the blond-haired boy and the purple-haired boy looked at each other and smiled, and thus began this strange friendship.

In the end, Liszt decided to keep part of the historical truth in his heart, and he would never tell others in his life that he had actually had a relationship with Alphard, and it was not an oolong.

While lying on the bed, Liszt was still humming his favorite opera: "If you fall in love with me, you are looking for bad luck. If I fall in love with you..."

You will die in my hands.

Chapter 32 The World's No.30 Second Maliciousness: It is said that Professor Snape told the story of the year, and he is also a very gossip person unexpectedly

When Snape sneaked out to spend Halloween with Lily that night, when he returned to the dormitory, he was taken aback by his roommate who was sitting in the corner with the lights on and pretending to be a ghost.

"What are you doing, creating a scary atmosphere for Halloween?"

Alphard glanced at Snape faintly, and said mechanically, "I'm trying to remember how much I love death in the future."

As for why the original owner misled Voldemort, Alphard came up with a strange idea in his constant thinking. He didn't know whether this idea was too big on his brain, or he finally remembered the way he wrote the article back then. It just suddenly felt that the original owner did this because he always felt that he would not have a good ending with Voldemort, he did not deserve to have a happy ending, so he had been trying his best to mess up the relationship between him and Voldemort.

There are two reasons for choosing Liszt. The other party is a playboy, so it shouldn't matter whether he is a lover or not; the other party is their friend, so the credibility will be much higher.

This unique new posture of death made Alphard feel like sleepwalking all the time. He always felt that he should yell to himself that you think too much, but there is always a small feeling in his heart. The voice said to him persistently, you are right, you are right, you have found the answer.

but why?Why did the original owner feel that he shouldn't be with Voldemort.

Alphard has never thought about this kind of problem since time travel. He said that he always felt that the past is past. He just needs to seize the present and let Voldemort fall in love with the present self instead of the shadow of the past. .So it doesn't really matter what he was like in the past.But now it seems that he was wrong, those pasts are very important, very important, he must know!

"Believe me, after I heard about you and Lord Voldemort from my mother, I understand enough about your death-loving character." Snape replied aside.

"Your mother?!" Alphard was taken aback.

Snape immediately explained awkwardly: "I'm not caring about you, nor gossip, I just, just, uh, in order to prepare for my future joining the Volpes Knights, I always need to understand the past between you and that lord Will it be an obstacle for me to join? So..."

"Tell me, tell me everything you know!" Alphard felt that Snape was his savior.

"OK, I'll tell you, but you need to calm down first, you look scary like this, you know?" Snape summoned the bell and asked Alphard for a glass of milk.From childhood to adulthood, whenever he felt sad and painful, his mother would always heat him a cup of milk and put some honey to sweeten his heart.

Alphard looked at the milk in his hand, silently: "You are really not creative, you know that?"

"I'd rather be uncreative than you've ever been creative about how to kill yourself." Snape always answered venomously, trying to make everyone understand how difficult he was.

"It seems that you really know a lot about my school days." Alphard looked forward to it more and more.

"More than that, my mother severed ties with the family and married my father in 1956. You graduated from Hogwarts in 1945, disappeared for ten years, and returned to the wizarding world in 1955. Do you understand what I mean?"

"You even know the first time I pretended to lose my memory!" Alphard really started to worship Snape.

Snape nodded: "In the year you returned to the wizarding world, you were a hot topic at the tea parties of the ladies. If you didn't have one or two things about you in your stomach, you would be laughed at. My mother At that time, it had been several years since she graduated from Hogwarts, and my grandmother had been trying her best to bring her to various tea parties and dance parties, so as to arrange... a blind date."

"The war of the remaining fighters." Alphard had an expression that I understood.

"Huh?" Snape didn't understand, because Alphard spoke Chinese.

"Those are not important, let's talk about what your mother knows according to the timeline." Alphard has always only got some points about what will happen in the future, and there is no way to connect them into a line. Now Snape finally brought him the gospel.

As Snape mentioned earlier, when his mother first entered Slytherin, it happened to be the peak of Voldemort and Alphard's seven-year student career. They and their friends were the most influential figures in Hogwarts. Even people who weren't in Slytherin fantasized about being able to sit at their table at dinner one day.

At that time, the Volpes Knights had already taken shape, and there was no Hogwarts student who would not want to join. Unfortunately, the conditions for joining have always been very strict. In terms of bloodlines, magic power, family background, etc., you always have to be top-notch. It's not enough to just get it.Especially the five-person group headed by Voldemort and Alphard, which has all the good external conditions and a body, whether it is blood, family background, appearance, or intelligence, they are the most outstanding children of heaven.

It was no longer news that Voldemort and Alphard had been dating since the fifth grade. They were inseparable forever, and their relationship was so strong that it was hard to get involved. Apart from their gender, they were a match made in heaven.

After graduating from the seventh grade, the best group of five decided to go on a graduation trip for several years, as every outstanding Hogwarts graduate would do, to study more advanced magic and practice it all over the world. , to practice, to feel the truth that they could not learn in school.

But as everyone knows, there were five of them when they set off, and only four of them left when they came back.

The four people who failed to complete the tour came back earlier than expected at the beginning. No one knew what happened to the graduation tour that year. They only knew that Alphard disappeared, where he went, and why he left. It was an accident. , or just really suddenly decided to abandon his friends, lovers and family... these questions have always been a mystery.

The remaining four people and Black's family tried everything they could think of to find Alphard, but they only got false news every time. They hoped again and again, but were disappointed again and again.

Ten years later, the reputation of the Volpes Knights has expanded from Hogwarts to the entire British wizarding world. Four of the five members have achieved great success and have taken over their family's business, and together they are working hard to develop Walpus. The Knights of Elpus.More and more outstanding people joined this organization and were proud to be its members. At that time, Voldemort had not yet become the master of everyone, and lord was just a joke when Lawrence and Abraxas joked.

The four of them never gave up looking for Alphard, and it could even be said that it was precisely because they wanted to find Alphard that they desperately expanded their power.

As a result... Alphard himself suddenly appeared one day, just like he disappeared back then, without leaving a word, no reason, no explanation, he left and came back again, he lived in an apartment in London, Say to every friend who comes to visit: "Hello, who are you? Sorry, I have Korsakoff syndrome."

Korsakoff Syndrome, also known as Organic Amnesia Syndrome, is an uncommon mental illness.However, there are many reasons that can cause this disease, such as chronic ethanol poisoning, mental disorders associated with craniocerebral injury, cerebral arteriosclerosis, brain tumors, and so on.The main manifestations of the affected patients are selective cognitive dysfunction, such as recent memory impairment, temporal and spatial orientation memory impairment, and imaginary disorder, but there will be no deterioration in IQ.

To put it simply, patients with the disease cannot retain the storage of information in the brain, such as the possibility of forgetting what they just said or what they did recently.

Alphard's performance is that he has forgotten where he has been for the past ten years and why he left.

"I have to say, the cause of the disease you found is really good. If you didn't destroy the Great Wall by yourself in the end, exposing that you didn't have amnesia, the entire magic world would believe you. The news of amnesia was published as important news, the headlines on the front page." Snape commented when he was talking about this, "Our school library has every issue of the Daily Prophet, if you are curious, you can find it yourself another day Look for the November 1955, 11 issue."

"Oh, now the whole of England knows I'm a liar." Alphard shook his head.

"No, probably the "Prophet Morning Post" also felt that it was a bit embarrassing to report that you didn't actually have amnesia. After all, what they said when they published your amnesia was sensational and touching, so in the end they did something about your follow-up report. Obfuscated. Not even a month after that report came out, and you left for France."

"Wait, when did I show up?" Alphard interrupted Snape aloud.

"In September 1955, exactly ten years before the day you disappeared, you came back on the day your friend held a commemorative party for you." Snape's mother was still in the Prince's family at that time Miss, I was also invited to that party.

Such a coincidental time, why do you think there is a problem.

In the autumn of 1955, Alphard appeared suddenly in September, and then hurried to France in December, even before Christmas. In just three months in the middle, something big enough to change the lives of many people happened.

For example, Liszt was seriously injured for unknown reasons and went to St. Mungo's to lie down for a year.

It's like Lawrence, on behalf of the Gump family, published a statement in the Daily Prophet newspaper to sever ties with the close in-law of the Black family, and angered his aunt Hesper who married into the main Black family.

Even better, Voldemort finally began to approach the dictatorial tyrant in the original story, ruthless, arbitrary, and gradually overshadowed the previous image of a leader as a master.

At this moment, Alphard finally discovered Liszt's lie in the corridor of the ball just now.

The author has something to say: Others may not be able to discover what Liszt is hiding, but Alphard must know about it XD