[Titanic] I can't help myself

"Who knows?" James said rascally. "Maybe it's because I'm more handsome?"

"James Durance!" I raised my voice and said seriously, "Don't forget, your wife is also in this house, are you not afraid that she will know?"

"Of course she will know." James' expression seemed to have heard some funny joke, "I never thought of hiding it from her."

"What?" I stared at him with wide eyes. "Oh, God, I thought you loved her."

"I do love her, otherwise I wouldn't have made such an effort to marry her home." James slowly adjusted his nightgown, covering the place that shouldn't be exposed, "But I love her and this matter Is there any necessary relationship?"

I took a deep breath and said, "I thought there shouldn't be such a big gap in the education we receive."

"Oh, my dear Saint Henry." James stood up with a smile, hooked my neck and dragged me to the sofa to sit down, "You think life is a love story? There will only be one person in your life. Love? Don’t be kidding, it’s impossible. You know, love is something that comes and goes quickly. There are too many wonderful girls in this world, fresh and exciting. You will know this after you taste it. How wonderful."

"And what about Carol?" I looked him in the eyes. "What is Carol?"

"Well, Henry," he paused, "Carol is different. How to put it? It's like, uh, you'll go to a lot of other places in your life, but whether it's for work, or for vacation, in the end Go back here, back to your home. Carol, she's my family, my wife, and I swear to God, she's the only wife I'll ever have in my life. But you can't keep me in a Don't go out, in that case, what's the difference with going to jail? Carol also understands this, so she won't be angry with me because I slept with other women, she knows I love her. "

Hearing this, I have nothing to say.Since he described his marriage in this way, it is useless for me to say anything else.I don't know whether Carol is really so generous, or because of the current situation, she can only pretend to be indifferent to her husband's blatant cheating.

"Don't just talk about me, talk about yourself." James put on a wretched expression.

"I don't seem to have any nasty scandals to share with you." I said with a straight face.

"No?" James smirked, "There are three things in this world that cannot be hidden, coughing, poverty, and love~" The last word, he used an exaggerated and dramatic tone to drag it out Yes, and then suddenly lowered his voice, and whispered softly in my ear, "You like Cal Hockley."

I stood up suddenly and looked down at him: "James, you drank too much. I don't want to listen to your nonsense anymore. I'm going back to sleep. Good night."

"Hey, don't go." He jumped up and pulled me back, "I'm talking to you seriously. Don't you want to talk about this with others? A person keeps all this in his heart and can't tell Anyone, don't you feel uncomfortable?"

"If you are changing the subject, congratulations, you succeeded." I shook his hand vigorously, "I really want to say good night, the sky is almost dawn."

The physical disparity gave James the upper hand, and he finally pushed me back on the couch.I felt that I was completely awake, and the last bit of drowsiness that remained was also driven away without a trace by the struggle just now.

I rubbed my face distractedly, "What do you really want to hear from me? Hear how I fell in love with him? Hear me analyze my heart? Hear me confess because I like my future brother-in-law?"

"Calm down, calm down." He patted me on the back, like coaxing a child, and I waved his hand away impatiently.

After a while, when I calmed down, he opened his mouth and said: "Poor child, only innocent teenagers will suffer like this for a hopeless secret love. Because they are too eager for a high level of spirit and body. Unified and beautiful love, but they don’t know that all love is just as simple as taking off your pants and putting them on again.”

I stared at him, so disgusted by his choice of words that I could barely speak, "So, this is your suggestion? Let me go with Carl..." I couldn't really say the last word, "You really... No shame!"

"Of course not! How could I be so mean?" James' tone was full of surprise, "Of course I can't make such a suggestion! I mean," he put his arms around my shoulders and said affectionately, "I It means that after you have tasted the beauty of sex, you will find that the bitter and sweet secret love that made you distressed before, compared with the enjoyment of the body, the former is nothing but something you couldn't get when you were young Toy."

I remained silent, and relaxed my body and leaned against the sofa.I'm not really a virgin. I'm not as naive as James thinks.His thinking is naturally irresponsible and unreliable.However, I think his suggestion is not unfeasible. During this period of time, I also thought about this: I really need something to divert my attention, and a physical lover might be a good choice.

Maybe it was because my expression softened, James said briskly: "Is your heart moved? Oh, it seems that the Christmas gift I gave is about to work."

"You mean the poetry anthology full of stilted, sleazy stuff?" I said deliberately. "I'm sorry, but I don't need it for love letters yet."

"It's that invitation card, I know you've seen it." He pushed me with his shoulder, "It's an invitation card from the most upscale ... brothel in London. It's different from ordinary ... brothel. The service of your needs." He puts the emphasis on the word "yours," and the implication is self-evident.

I pursed my lips and couldn't speak for a long time, "I'm curious how you know."

"Sometimes, after eating too much dinner, I would like to change the taste and eat some exotic food." He squinted his eyes, leaned his head back, and looked at the ceiling, "The taste is really delicious. Not bad. How about it, when will I take you to see it, and make you a real man."

I gotta say this really got me.The memory of the body from the previous life flooded up, and I suddenly felt a little parched.

"I'm really going to go back to sleep." Finally I stood up, "You should go to bed early, too."

James raised his eyebrows, but wisely he didn't ask further, "Okay, good night."

"Don't forget about Beth." I reminded, "You'd better handle it beautifully. If there is a scandal from Acton because of this, I will kill you."

"Beth? Oh, oh." He said casually, and walked out of the guest room with me, "I see, but a necklace or a pair of earrings can solve the problem. I have more experience in dealing with this than you. It's a pity Well, if only you'd been a little later, she's a real stunner."

"Shut up." I said impatiently.

The next morning, I was sitting at the table eating breakfast when Rose came in like a whirlwind.The men quickly stood up politely.

"Why did you fire Beth, what did she do wrong?" she yelled at me angrily.

"I think you should sit down first, or everyone will have to stand," I reminded her.

The manservant waiting at the side pulled away the chair, and Rose sat in angrily.

"Why did you fire Beth? She has served me for five years and has never made a mistake," she pressed.

"Did Beth tell you I fired her?" I asked back.

"She didn't say anything like that." Rose looked reluctant, "But when she said goodbye to me, she left crying. She said she didn't want to leave me, but there was no way."

This woman is really...I really shouldn't save her face by leaving her until morning!I cursed secretly in my heart.I thought she was a victim of being seduced by James, but now that I think about it, an unmarried woman who took the initiative to climb into the bed of a married nobleman must not be a pure and good person.

"So you're guessing about me firing Beth? Oh, Rose, you did me wrong, and I didn't fire her," I breathed a sigh of relief, without looking at her again, and shook her head away. The newspaper, "she was going to leave herself, and she was very rude when she knew that she was going to leave, that is, last night, and she told Mrs. Ford that she seemed to have found a more promising job. I also paid her three dollars for this." month's salary. As for why she told you that, it's probably because she knows that you are soft-hearted and easy to deceive, and she wants to make a good impression on her former master so that she can leave a way out."

"If she was going to resign, why didn't she tell me earlier? Leaving in such a hurry will cause huge inconvenience to the employer, and I'm afraid it can only leave a bad impression. So it doesn't make sense at all logically!"

"Then how do you explain it?" I put down the newspaper, "If she really did something wrong, I will never pay her an extra penny, and I will let her leave here immediately, where will I leave her time with you?" bid farewell."

Rose couldn't speak.She sat on a chair and looked at me angrily with her chin raised, her chest heaving up and down due to her violent breathing.

"It must be you who fired her. You are too much!" After she finished speaking, she stood up abruptly and rushed out like a whirlwind.The men hurriedly stood up to see her off.

There was silence at the dinner table.I saw Uncle Connery wink ambiguously at James, and Viscount Stewart glanced at them with a more serious expression.

Suffice it to say, I am amazed at how quickly gossip spreads in the castle.I would have liked Beth to go away quietly, and to cover it up with an excuse, to put the matter down.I didn't expect this woman to be so ignorant.

I glanced back at Charles standing in the corner.He immediately understood what I meant and nodded slightly.After serving our meal in a while, he will go downstairs and beat all the servants to stop the spread of this pornographic news.

After breakfast, James stopped me in the corridor. Seeing that there was no one around, he lowered his voice and asked, "How are you thinking?"

I was silent for a while, then replied, "Where is it?"

James laughed immediately when he heard my question: "It's just on the outskirts of London. You know, this kind of place can't be built in a location that is too eye-catching. Whenever you want to go, I will take you. In addition to invitations, that place also needs a regular customer to lead the way."

"Its entry criteria are as strict as the White Gentlemen's Club." I sneered.

"After all, it's different, and everything should be careful. I heard from Emily that my mother and Aunt Ruth plan to live in Bath City together for a period of time in late January or early February. If I have time, I can drive I'll take you there. It's halfway between Bath and London, less than an hour's drive away."

I thought I was so crazy that I actually discussed with my married straight male cousin to go to a brothel to buy sex, and the ticket was still a man.But what is more in my heart is an inexplicable excitement and expectation.For a moment, I suddenly felt that James might be right. A hearty feast of the flesh might really make the bitter and hopeless secret love insignificant.

The author has something to say: The college entrance examination will be held tomorrow~ I wish all the third-year seniors can get good grades in the exam~~~~ Come on! ! ! !Wait until you come back from the exam~~What~~~~