keep watch

There are no objects, only motion - Bergson

Shen Yiyan came back early, and checked the latest payment on his mobile phone. The work in the laboratory has entered the final stage. Liu Bo recently assigned several professor assistants, and Shen Yiyan was among them.

"Yiyan, this is the application form for exchange students." Liu Bo pushed his eyes. Every year, foreign friendship schools will provide three places. Liu Bo picked two graduate students. Shen Yiyan, an undergraduate student.

"Yiyan, you are a very good kid, I hope you can cherish this opportunity." Liu Bo said.

"Liu Bo...I..." Shen Yiyan hesitated.

Liu Bo frowned and sighed: "Yiyan, this time I recommended you to them, and they agreed. This opportunity is hard-won."

Shen Yiyan lowered her eyes: "Professor, how long will this exchange take?"

"Two years."

"Okay, thank you professor." Shen Yiyan finally took the application form.

Two years... Will it be too long?Two years can't...

Shen Yiyan leaned against the door, the light from the outer ring penetrated vertically, and the building was surrounded by fog and clouds, without the blessing of the so-called Tyndall effect, it could only scatter in all directions, swaying on Shen Yiyan's white face.

Shen Yiyan gritted his teeth, and left after a while.

Zhou Xingchen's exam was over, and he was already relaxed. He received a notice from the landlord that something happened to the maintenance master's house, and there might be a delay of a few days.

Zhou Xingchen said repeatedly that he was very happy to live in Shen Yiyan's house these days. Although Shen Yiyan was cold on the surface, he was very good at taking care of himself.

Zhou Xingchen bought the food, thinking that he should show his skills and make more dishes, so that Shen Yiyan can also see his cooking skills.

Recently, he deliberately downloaded textbooks from the Internet and watched videos of some bloggers, with the purpose of learning a few dishes.

When eating at school before, Zhou Xingchen always thought with disgust that this dish was not as delicious as Shen Yiyan's cooking. When he saw a kitten on the road, he would think of Shen Yiyan's clear and clean eyes every time he looked at him...

And recently, the number of times of waking up at night has become more frequent. The most embarrassing time was meeting Shen Yiyan who came out of the room in the middle of the night.

At that time, Zhou Xingchen was suffering from suffocation, and his lower body was hot and dry repeatedly, and he needed relief.

Shen Yiyan thought he was uncomfortable, approached him, and asked with concern: "Are you uncomfortable?"

Zhou Xingchen lowered his head and could smell the fragrance of Shen Yiyan's hair, a faint scent of cypress, and further down, he could see the trembling eyelashes, like a butterfly kissing a flower bud, and the narrow and long eyes, followed by the small white The face, the gap between the clothes and the skin, and more indescribable obscurity.

For some reason, Zhou Xingchen's brain swelled, and an evil fire rushed into his heart. Shen Yiyan reached out to touch his forehead, but Zhou Xingchen avoided it.

Shen Yiyan looked at Zhou Xingchen strangely.

"I'm fine, I'm just going to the bathroom." Zhou Xingchen sullenly poured cold water on the bathroom repeatedly, only to extinguish the evil fire.

Zhou Xingchen sighed helplessly, feeling that he needed to calm down for a while.

"Shen Yiyan, don't you know what I think about you? It's been so long, and I still miss you. I came to look for you as soon as I returned to China."

Zhou Xingchen stopped, and in front of the house, Shen Yiyan was confronting a man, who seemed to be the man in front of the supermarket last time.

Not a boyfriend?Zhou Xingchen pursed his lips, it seemed that this man was pestering Shen Yiyan, and he was actually a little excited.

"Liao Yining, I said, I don't like you, you can go." Shen Yiyan frowned, feeling a headache.

Liao Yining had stayed in the laboratory for a while before. He was a senior brother who was one level older than himself. He seemed to like to ask him for help. Shen Yiyan didn't pay much attention to this senior brother. It wasn't until one day that Liao Yining suddenly confessed to him that Shen Yiyan suddenly realized.

But he really couldn't understand Liao Yining's motivation for liking him, he didn't have much impression of this senior brother.

"Aren't you even willing to give me a chance?" Liao Yining asked anxiously, looking at Shen Yiyan's indifferent eyes, a little embarrassed.

He, Liao Yining, is a typical rich second generation, and it is unavoidable to have a lot of flirts. Most of the people he dated in the past were attached to him, and the first time he was attracted to Shen Yiyan was Shen Yiyan. So he used some tricks to enter the laboratory, and chased him for a while, but Shen Yiyan ignored him, and before going abroad, he went to make a confession that everyone knew, but Shen Yiyan didn't even look at him, turned around and walked away. By leaving, I humiliated myself in front of everyone.

He thought that there was no one he couldn't deal with, and his obsession took root in his heart, and he asked for Shen Yiyan's address as soon as he returned to China.

"Liao Yining, you are really annoying." Shen Yiyan suppressed the irritability in her heart, not wanting to argue anymore.

Liao Yining didn't give up and wanted to make another bet for the last time. He grabbed Shen Yiyan's hand and wanted to take this person away.

Zhou Xingchen immediately turned dark, walked out, pulled Liao Yining's hand away, threw him to the base of the wall, then protected Shen Yiyan behind him, and said to Liao Yining, "Get out."

"Zhou Xingchen..." Shen Yiyan murmured, a little panicked

He's seen it all... Will he think I... like men... Zhou Xingchen doesn't like men.

Zhou Xingchen didn't notice that Shen Yiyan was wrong, and looked coldly at the man who fell to the ground in a panic.

"Who are you?" Liao Yining looked pained, clutching his shoulders, just now his shoulder hit the corner of the wall, and now he was in pain.

"It has nothing to do with you." Zhou Xingchen said, "Don't let me see you again."

Then he took Shen Yiyan's hand, opened the door, and walked in.

Leaving behind Liao Yining, who was ashamed, he seriously doubted whether he had read it wrong. Shen Yiyan hated having physical contact with others the most...

"Zhou Xingchen...I..." Shen Yiyan lowered his head, words choked in his throat.

"The next time you meet him, just tell me." Zhou Xingchen reached out and stroked the hair on Shen Yiyan's forehead.

"Don't you find it strange?" Shen Yiyan looked at Zhou Xingchen.

"What?" Zhou Xingchen asked in confusion, only to see Shen Yiyan's eyes dodge, avoiding his sight.

"You're not afraid... I like men..." Shen Yiyan teased, her nails digging deep into her flesh.

"I'm not afraid." Zhou Xingchen said, and then showed a peaceful smile, there was no sarcasm or disgust in his eyes, it seemed to be distressed.

"Okay, I'll cook today, just wait." Zhou Xingchen pushed Shen Yiyan onto the sofa, and then went into the kitchen.

"Thank you, Zhou Xingchen." Shen Yiyan murmured, his eyes were wet.

Even if you are in darkness, keep your heart toward the light.

The sky is indigo blue, and a few wild geese fly across, across the chaos, but fly south in the sky.

"Xing Chen, will you come to this alumni meeting?" said the other end. "Long time no see, everyone."

"I will go, I miss you all too." Zhou Xingchen picked up a few green radishes.

"That's fine. We'll send you the time and location later." The other end was happy.

"Okay, thank you." Zhou Xingchen poured water and placed them on the balcony. The half-palm-sized leaves were verdant and glistening, very pleasant.

Shen Yiyan often uses his eyes, looking at the green color will relieve fatigue, do you want to put a pot in his room?

Zhou Xingchen picked up a pot and came to the room opposite Shen Yiyan. There was only one bed, one table and one chair.

Zhou Xingchen put the green radish on the table, and when he was about to leave, he kicked the bottom of the table and hit something.

Zhou Xingchen squatted down and took it out. It was a photo album, and a thick layer of dust had already accumulated on it. After the dust was scattered, Zhou Xingchen wanted to put it back on the table.

I don't know if I can see Shen Yiyan's previous appearance

Zhou Xingchen withdrew his hand and opened the photo album...

When Shen Yiyan came back, the house was very quiet, the only difference was that there were a few more green plants under the TV, Shen Yiyan pursed his lips, last time Zhou Xingchen mentioned to himself that the atmosphere in the house was dull, and he wanted to buy some plants to add some color.

Walking around the house for a week, he didn't see Zhou Xingchen.

Where have you been?

The refrigerator was full of stalls, but Shen Yiyan didn't have much appetite, so he just finished two slices of bread hastily.

In the evening Zhou Xingchen sent a message saying that something happened at home and he has not been back for the past few days.

Shen Yiyan felt a little lost, staring blankly at those green plants, what's their name?

Shen Yiyan took out her phone and checked it.

Green dill

Flower Language: Watching for Happiness

Shen Yiyan felt a warm feeling in his heart, and he loved those green radishes more and more.

There is one person missing in the family, and Shen Yiyan is still not used to sleeping at night. In fact, his sleep is very light, and he can hear Zhou Xingchen waking up every night. I remember that it was the last time. He thought Zhou Xingchen was sick and wanted to touch his forehead , but he avoided it.

Thinking of this, Shen Yiyan felt irritable and rubbed against the quilt.

But as soon as he saw Luluo in front of the bed, his mind became much calmer, and Shen Yiyan fell asleep not long after.

Zhou Xingchen shook the wine glass in front of him, and was in a daze, feeling as if something was being shackled in his heart and could not be released.

"Xingchen, what's the matter, you've been absent-minded all night, and our old classmates are all waiting for you to join us." The squad leader laughed.

"It's okay." Zhou Xingchen suppressed the bitterness at the corner of his mouth.

In the middle of the journey, a girl joked: "Think that Xingchen was the school girl in our school at the time."

"That's right, there are piles of presents every day, I'm so envious." The tablemate shouted.

"Xingchen, do you still remember the grapefruit candies you often received at that time?" The deskmate touched Zhou Xingchen's arm.

Zhou Xingchen nodded to indicate that at that time he often received whole boxes of grapefruit candies, but later he gave them to others...

Grapefruit candy...Shen Yiyan likes grapefruit candy the most, could it be...

"Didn't you keep looking for this person who gave you grapefruit candies at that time? You said you hated grapefruit candies the most, but you waited for a long time for that person to come..."

"Then one morning when I entered the classroom early, I saw a boy stuffing something into your drawer. The boy ran away when he saw me. I walked into the drawer and saw that it was a box of grapefruit candies."

"That boy seems to have skipped a grade, what is his name Shen...Shen...Yi"

"Shen Yiyan." Zhou Xingchen said, clenched the water glass in his hand, the tip of his nose couldn't help sour.

"Yes, it's him. You already knew that. It's really boring."

"Hey, Zhou Xingchen still kills both men and women." Everyone was laughing, but no one knew the pain in Zhou Xingchen's heart.

Shen Yiyan likes herself.

Zhou Xingchen flipped through that photo album, each one was of himself, and the date was marked on the back, from junior high school to university, a total of ten years.

The neon lights in the bar were flickering, Zhou Xingchen drank a lot of wine, and was lying powerlessly on the sofa at the moment, staring at his shallow consciousness, the noise around him made his heart feel empty, and the inexplicable irritability poured out his raging nerves.

He vaguely recalled the first time he met Shen Yiyan, he should have sensed something was wrong at that time, when Shen Yiyan talked to him, he would always lower his head, not daring to look into his eyes, like a lost deer, nonsensical words, inexplicable concern , made Zhou Xingchen think that Shen Yiyan wanted to be friends with him.

Zhou Xingchen swept through his brain, and in those fragmented memories of the past, Shen Yiyan never appeared.

Why does he like me?Zhou Xingchen closed his eyes.

Shen Yiyan finished counting the last statistic, rubbed his sore shoulders, looked up at the big clock hanging on the wall, it was already ten o'clock, he got up, couldn't hold back his thoughts, turned on his phone, and wanted to see if Zhou Xingchen was there Send yourself a message.

The answer is no, Shen Yiyan was in a daze, not knowing whether to go home or not, since Zhou Xingchen left three days ago, there has been no news from him.

After a few minutes, Shen Yiyan got up, tidied up the materials on the table, and turned off the lights in the laboratory.

Let's go back.Shen Yiyan sighed.

When he opened the door, the light was on, and Shen Yiyan subconsciously realized that Zhou Xingchen had returned.

Zhou Xingchen was cooking porridge in the kitchen at the moment, when he heard the sound, he walked out of the kitchen and met Shen Yiyan just in time.

He froze for a moment, and just asked, "Did you not eat?"

"No." Shen Yiyan replied, Zhou Xingchen's hair was messy, the dark circles under his eyes were a bit heavy, and there were bruises drooping under his nose, and he looked haggard.

"I made porridge, you can eat it while it's hot." Zhou Xingchen said.

"Did you not rest these days?" Shen Yiyan took a step forward after speaking.

"It's okay." Zhou Xingchen smiled wryly, then took the initiative to walk into the kitchen, opened the lid of the pot, hot steam rushed towards his face, picked a bowl at random, filled it with porridge, came to the living room, and signaled Shen Yiyan to come over: "Try it. "

Shen Yiyan sat down obediently, and began to drink porridge, which tasted very light, but the mellow taste stuck to his stomach.

The smile in the corner of Shen Yiyan's eyes was very warm, and he said to Zhou Xingchen, "It's delicious."

Seeing Shen Yiyan like this, Zhou Xingchen was stunned. He had been staying at a friend's house for the past few days, thinking about how to face Shen Yiyan in the future. He had never liked a man before, and he didn't know how he liked him just now.

Shen Yiyan finished eating quickly, and saw Zhou Xingchen staring at him, his ears burning, and asked curiously, "Aren't you going to eat?"

"I cooked it specially for you." Zhou Xingchen heard this, crossed his hands in front of his chest, and leaned his back slightly forward, feeling a little cramped.

"Thank you...thank you." Shen Yiyan was a little surprised, and then moved.

"Shen Yiyan." Zhou Xingchen called out suddenly, the air was inexplicably silent, even though there was a lingering coolness in his heart.

"Huh?" Shen Yiyan said.

"Did you go to the same school as me before?" Zhou Xingchen said in a low voice, his eyes secretive.

Shen Yiyan's brain froze for a second before slowly answering: "Yes."

"I went to a class reunion before, and they talked about you, so I realized that you and I are in the same school." Zhou Xingchen sneered. "Did you already know?"

"Yeah." Shen Yiyan nodded with difficulty, and said word by word: "You don't remember me, so I think it's the first time we met."

meeting for the first time?Zhou Xingchen looked at Shen Yiyan, with his head down, looking a little nervous, like a child who made a mistake.I feel a little uncomfortable.

"Then you already knew me before, right?" Zhou Xingchen continued to ask.

"En." Shen Yiyan's hands trembled a little, he didn't know why Zhou Xingchen asked these questions, did he notice something?

"Shen Yiyan, don't you have anything to say to me?" Zhou Xingchen propped up Shen Yiyan's face, the slight heat from his fingertips spread to Shen Yiyan's skin, making people feel hot.

Shen Yiyan looked at Zhou Xingchen in puzzlement, her lips trembled slightly, but she didn't say anything in the end.

"Forget it." Zhou Xingchen sighed.I got up and said: "The maintenance master came to my house today and repaired the circuit. I will trouble you during this time."

Shen Yiyan paused, trembling slightly, a little caught off guard.Even the apex of my heart was pantothenic, "It's okay."

"Have a good rest." Zhou Xingchen said, and then left.

There are fewer people in the room, and it seems that the warmth is also missing, and the vigorous vitality is gone forever.

Shen Yiyan walked into the room, suddenly thought of something, he knelt down in front of the table, and looked down, the photo album was gone.

Shen Yiyan's mind was in a state of confusion, and his mind went blank. Apart from himself who knew the existence of this photo album, there was only one person who could find it.

He knew it all, Shen Yiyan only had this thought in his mind at the moment.

Did you leave because you liked him?

Shen Yiyan's heart ached terribly.