Diary of the poisonous brother

Someone once asked me, why do I hate romance novels so much?If you have nothing to do, you smash the romance novel stalls, burn the finished romance novels, eat romance novel authors and so on, and make so many romance novel authors turn to BL in anger, and write all kinds of meat articles about you every day, aren't you angry?

Regarding this kind of thing, I just want to say, why should I be angry when I write my total subject essay?If you want to be angry, it's because my family is angry. I can see that he is jealous because of me. I don't mind sacrificing my image. Anyway, those people can see it but can't attack it.Besides, Mr. Qingyuan thinks I'm unruly, self-willed and hypocritical. I hope that I will be virtuous and kind, so I will show him virtuousness.

As for the authors of romance novels, it’s not wrong to eat as much as you can, and if you eat one, you will lose one. If you are asked to write that kind of brain-dead novel, reading too much will reduce your intelligence, okay!

Great boy, just because you guys have turned into little brains, it's fine for him to become a little brainless, and he made me suffer.

BY The above content is excerpted from the article "The Autobiography of Jidao Demon Venerable Qi Qiandie".

"Little sister! Don't say that again, I understand." The boy interrupted Qi Qiandie again with a heartbroken expression.

Are you in pain?I'm really in pain!The balls are about to shatter!

"You know? What do you know?" Qi Qiandie couldn't help but ask, even though he knew that the guy in front of him was a big fool who liked to open his mind, and that curiosity would kill a corpse.

"I know you don't want to embarrass me, that's why you said that nothing happened to us last night." The young man looked at Qi Qian who was slightly blue with an expression of "I understand everything, don't try to escape". Butterfly comforted me very well: "little sister, don't worry, I'm not that kind of irresponsible man, so you don't need to say that kind of thing to comfort me, or say that you want to say that kind of thing to say that kind of thing on purpose. Get rid of me. I'm not stupid, really!"

You are so stupid, really!

Qi Qiandie silently turned her head to the side, bared her mouth and exposed two shiny white fangs where the young man could not see.

If it wasn't for the opponent's level being higher than his own, and disciples of this kind of great sect, when they go out, the so-called soul card will be ordered by the master to check the life and death of the disciples in the sect. If he can't bite him to death, he will be in great trouble. This thing is bitten to death.

The young man who still didn't know that he had just escaped from the clutches of the god of death continued to speak calmly: "Although, little sister, you are still young, but... just in case... just in case..."

Speaking of this, the boy's voice, which had always been loud and dignified, suddenly became like a mosquito. Qi Qiandie listened to it for a long time, but couldn't understand what the other party was saying.

"What are you talking about?" Qi Qiandie knew that curiosity killed the corpse, but she couldn't help turning her head around, trying to hear what the boy said clearly.

Absolutely not to satisfy any gossip, but just don't want to be called a deaf poisonous corpse.

The young man blushed, looking at Qi Qiandie's bright eyes full of doubts and curiosity, no matter how you look at them, his blushing became even more intense, "I'm talking... say... Although you are very young, in case ...you left me...you have a child again...so what should I do?"

"Ah? Child?" Qi Qiandie was startled, and instinctively lowered her head. There are still boys in this world... Bah!What boys and girls?Even if you can have a man and a boy, you must have sexual behaviors to have a baby. You can't give birth to a baby after sleeping. I have a little scientific knowledge.

"That's right! My child... I don't want my child to be left outside..." The young man didn't pay attention to Qi Qiandie's surprised expression, and was still immersed in his own thoughts, "I don't want to find a girl who looks like me in ten or so years. It's very like my child...and very smart and cute...and everyone says he's my son, but I... Anyway, I can't be like the one in "I Don't Want You, The Devil Lord: The Playful Girl Runs with the Ball", "Yuanying" The monk's genius baby: one-night stand, mother is a mortal", "Baby Goes to Battle: God Transformation Father Pursues Runaway Mommy Again", and..."

"Stop, stop, stop! What are you talking about? Running with the ball, baby geniuses, what are these things?" Qi Qiandie twitched her lips. Why do these things look familiar? I remember when I was in junior high school. At that time, the little girl at the next table was always talking about these things.

You are a cultivator who loves to read romance novels so much, does your master know that?

Romance novels are not only about running with the ball, but also the two labels of erroneous hits and accidental collisions, did you know that?

"Romance novels! I really don't like to read them, but my younger junior sisters like to read them. They said that after reading this, they can understand the little girl's mind, so I was curious and asked them to borrow a few books... Unexpectedly, It’s really useful.” There was a smile on the young man’s face, life is really like a novel, this kind of one-night stand with the ball running for more than ten years and then reunited, he actually met him, “I absolutely can’t let me The child of the family is wandering...hey...little sister, what are you doing?"

Seeing Qi Qiandie who suddenly stood up and roared "Even if I die, I will kill you", the young man did not dodge or dodge, but hugged Qi Qiandie into his arms and let him bite hard , crying and biting, just stroking Qi Qiandie's smooth black hair calmly, and said in a sad tone: "I know, this kind of thing is a big blow to you girls, so if you If you want to cry, you can cry, and you will feel better when you cry."

"Kuni Coal!" Qi Qiandie raised her head, her eyes were red and swollen, her face was covered with tears and snot, "What is swollen..."

Qi Qiandie raised her head and looked at the young man who said aggrievedly. Because his expression was too ferocious, his mouth couldn't help but open too much. The young man who was looking at his future daughter-in-law suddenly realized...

"Little sister, why did your teeth fall out?" The young man held Qi Qiandie's pink face and looked at his mouth. Two small black holes suddenly appeared on a row of neat white teeth. It looked particularly shocking.

"The child is not like Ni, Jie Moying, the teeth are full of birds (it's not you, so hard, the teeth have fallen out)..." Not only the teeth fell out, but also the words leaked.

The more Qi Qiandie thought about it, the more sad she became, and the more sad she thought, the more sad she became to the extreme, and she beat the young man's chest with her fingers.

"Boom boom boom!"

The fingers of the corpse poked the human chest, and there was a knocking sound.

ah?How is this going?

Qi Qiandie pressed hard on the young man's chest, oh my, the chest muscles are so hard, as hard as steel, no wonder the bite just now broke her own teeth.

Qi Qiandie covered her mouth, not only her teeth, but even her whole mouth was a little sour due to the strong shock force.

"What's going on?" Qi Qiandie looked up at the boy.

"This...then what...I think you want to bite me, little sister...I'm more afraid of pain, so I used a blunt gold talisman to make my skin..." Facing Qi Qiandie's menacing eyes, the teenager Letting go of Qi Qiandie, she shrank her body back, lowered her head and dared not say anything.

Damn!Brother hates this kind of pretending to be a pig and eating old... No, pretending to be pure and cute is eating up this little poisonous corpse of me too much.

"Put on your clothes first!" Qi Qiandie turned her head to one side with a dark face, biting herself desperately, she never thought that this guy would have such a trick, it really killed the dead.

"Clothes?" The young man was aroused by Qi Qiandie's words, as if awakened from a dream, and suddenly jumped up, "By the way, I haven't got any clothes on...Huh? Where are my clothes and my Qiankun bag?"

After the other party has been fascinated by "pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa blah", and then help people put on clothes, it is not the conscience of the industry, or it is a show for TV dramas.

Qi Qiandie has no conscience, nor is she a director of TV dramas, so she naturally doesn't know how to help the boy get dressed, so the boy is talking naked from the beginning to the end.

Practitioners are really not afraid of cold and heat, and have no integrity.

Looking at the naked boy who was hopping on the ground looking for clothes, Qi Qiandie thought of the number of spirit stones he had found in the other party's Qiankun bag, regardless of his exposed teeth, he was in a good mood and kindly reminded: "Ah... That? Could it be taken by that woman?"

Reminded by Qi Qiandie's words, the young man slapped his forehead suddenly, and said in a tone of sudden realization: "Yes! It must be that woman, she is really a hateful witch!"

OK!Planted successfully!Successfully cleaned up!

Qi Qiandie secretly made a "V" gesture in his heart, the corners of his mouth were raised high, and two rows of white teeth were exposed. He was about to have a sunny smile when he suddenly felt a small cold wind from the holes on the left and right teeth. Pour it into your mouth.

"Damn!" Qi Qiandie roared in her heart, her face was tense, she covered her mouth with her hand, and said in a muffled voice: "Big brother, I have..."

Qi Qiandie worked hard, really wanting to sell the Wududingguo set that was not sold to Yi last time.

Although the boy is not as tall and straight as Yi, he still has a good figure with an inverted triangle waist, six-pack abs and complete mermaid lines, barely worthy of his Ding Guo set.

"Fortunately, I still have clothes here." Before Qi Qiandie could express his kindness, the young man stopped searching, and Shen Nian already had a black bead in his hands, and then he, like magic, slid out of the bead Take out a Taoist robe and put it on yourself.

I saw him wearing a jade crown, dressed in white, with a handsome appearance and a noble demeanor, which is usually not obvious... This is actually a deep addict of romance novels, and he is also a rich addict of romance novels.

Qi Qiandie stared straight at the black bead in the young man's hand. Although he was ignorant and had little knowledge and experience, he didn't know what level of treasure the black bead in the young man's hand should be, but Qi Qiandie was sure that it must be a mustard space, and it was A mustard space better than your own "little floating island".

The Yunyang Spiritual World is a poor spiritual world, not to mention the mustard space, which already belongs to legendary treasures, even the Qiankun Bag... Think about what kind of bags NPCs sell on the sword level [-] and [-] maps, at best It's just a colorful brocade backpack with twelve spaces.

But this young man, not only can he take out a mustard space casually, even the Qiankun bags confiscated by Qi Qiandie are at least at the level of Tiangong brocade bags with [-] spaces.

Isn't he from Yunyang Spiritual Realm?By the way, he just said that he came from a spirit world called... Yunmeng.

Could it be that this Yunmeng Spirit World is an advanced map?Advanced maps mean more opportunities and more delicacies.

Qi Qiandie suddenly felt that maybe he could take advantage of the young man and get married or something.Don't you see that in the 21st century, there are many Chinese girls who engage in fake marriages for the purpose of immigrating to foreign countries.

It seems that next, I have to treat him well and hold him in the palm of my hand.

Unexpectedly, the young man who had become a good target for marriage and immigration changed his clothes, tied up his hair, took out two portions of dry food and water from the black pearl, handed one of them to Qi Qiandie, and said softly: "Just now After tossing and tossing for so long, are you hungry, little sister? Come on, eat something first, and we'll be on our way after eating."

"On the road?" On what road?Shall I send you to Huangquan Road? "Ahem, I mean big brother, do you want to take me back to your division?"

"Of course, a gentleman. Don't worry, I will definitely take you back to the teacher's door, and then tell the master to marry you." The young man looked at Qi Qiandie, who was holding on to the dry food with both hands, and his face looked a little frightened, and said with gentleness. He said in a calm tone: "Little sister, you don't have to be so nervous. Come on, eat some biscuits first, then drink some water..."

The tension on Qi Qiandie's face relaxed slightly, and then she was obediently coaxed by the boy, and took a bite of dry food.

As a poisonous corpse, human food is naturally optional for him.Also because of the existence of Bigu Pill, even ordinary monks can eat or not eat food, so before taking the first bite, Qi Qiandie was still slandering in her heart that local tyrants are local tyrants, and they still eat dry food when they go out. Will a bigu pill kill people?

Well, although eating Bigu Dan will not kill people, but eating Bigu Dan will make people feel so bad that they will die.

But Qi Qiandie still thinks that this guy is too inexperienced, and he talks about eating and drinking like this outside, no wonder he will be regarded as fat... huh?This pie is delicious!Not only does it taste very good, but it also increases spiritual power after eating.

Qi Qiandie looked at the spiritual energy number displayed under the Jiansan meridian system, and her eyes lit up. This is a cake made of spiritual rice.

Lingmi and Lingcai have very high requirements for the content of spiritual energy in the soil, so although there are many in Tianyi Sect, everyone can get some as long as they have the status of a disciple of the sect, but in the Tibetan Sword Sect This kind of impoverished sect is extremely rare, except for the sect master, the masters of various peaks and their direct disciples, other people can't even smell it.

Not only that, but in fact, even the sect master, masters of various peaks, and direct disciples can get very little weight every month, which is even less than the weight that an ordinary inner sect disciple can get from Tian Yijiao.

It is just a little exposed between the fingernails of the rich, enough to feed the poor for three years. It is no wonder that so many people hate wealth and strive for wealth.

The reason why Qi Qiandie knew the specific number of lingmi and lingcai servings in Zangjianmen was because Qian Qingchen, who was a direct disciple of the head of the sect, arrived at the time of monthly salary every month when he was in Zangjianmen. For a few days, he would carry his orders on his back, such as lingmi lingcai and the elixir he had practiced, and would come to him in a "squeaky" manner.

Thinking of the deliciousness of her dim sum, and the beautiful days when she licked a mouthful of dim sum, ate a mouthful of rice, ate another mouthful of rice, and licked another mouthful of dim sum, Qi Qiandie immediately felt that the dry food in front of her was a little tasteless, took a sip of water, and put the dry food in the On the ground, I started to sigh, "My sweetheart...I can't even eat without you..."

"Little sister, what's wrong with you? Is it not delicious? Or do you want some snacks? As for snacks, I don't have them here, but I heard that there is a place called Baihuaji in front. If you want to eat, I will buy them for you." The boy Looking at Qi Qiandie, who was frowning and looked anorexic, she said worriedly.

"It's okay big brother, I just... have a toothache." Qi Qiandie pouted, showing the two small black holes on her teeth for the boy to see.

"Oh, it's this...it's just a small matter..." The young man responded, then took out a spell from his pocket, and thought in his mouth, holding the spell with his middle finger and index finger, he gesticulated in the air for a while, and the spell in his hand emitted bursts of red light , and then spontaneously ignited without fire, and quickly burned to ashes.

The young man put the ashes of the talisman and the remaining unburned parts of the talisman into the water bottle, shook the bottle with his hand, and after making sure that the ashes of the talisman and the water were fully fused, he handed the water bottle to Qi Qiandie with a serious expression on his face said, "Drink it."

"Ah?" Qi Qiandie's terrified eyes drifted between the boy and Fu Shui, "Then what..." He cleared his throat, his voice was dry, "Do I have to drink it?"

Qi Qiandie looked at the boy with a serious expression, feudal superstition or something, isn't it?Fushui or something, it's too unscientific.

Seeing the doubts in Qi Qiandie's heart, the boy explained: "Little sister, don't worry, this is our special growth water made by Qianfumen. After drinking it, your teeth are guaranteed to grow back."

"Thousand Talisman Gate?" Although Qi Qiandie has never heard of this sect, he knew from the name that it is a sect that mainly makes talismans. This kind of sect with life skills is generally a sect of local tyrants. There will be side effects... I mean, apart from the teeth, there will be no other problems, right? Also, if the object of drinking is not a human being, but another creature... Let me make an analogy, if a mouse drinks it, it will My teeth are already growing fast, and I drank this... I'm just making an analogy..."

Seeing the young man frowning because of his words, Qi Qiandie couldn't help but slapped the sky.

Even if he is not afraid that this is some kind of Zombie Catching Talisman, if he takes a sip and will reveal his original shape, Qi Qiandie is also afraid that this thing will have side effects on his teeth. The two he lost are standard fangs, the main force of blood-sucking and biting people tooth.

"Little sister, why do you make such an analogy? As a disciple of the Thousand Talisman Sect, I have been dealing with these spells since I was a child. How could I mistake their performance. As for the mouse or animal you mentioned..." Professional knowledge, the young man immediately put on a "sacred and inviolable" look, and said in a tone of "you are insulting me": "Our spells must be tested on animals before they are used on humans, otherwise How could it be used recklessly on people? If something goes wrong, who will be responsible? So little sister, don’t be afraid, come and drink it.”

The boy brought the water bottle to Qi Qiandie's mouth again, and Qi Qiandie waved her hands in surprise and shouted "No, I'll do it myself".

What are you kidding?The animal experiments you do are nothing more than experiments on mammals, dogs, cats, monkeys, etc. Although these things are not human, they are still alive anyway. Brother is not even alive, and the heart is not beating. How can it grow again? New teeth?

Seeing that she couldn't evade it, Qi Qiandie grimaced, grabbed the water bottle, covered it with her sleeve, and seemed to drink the water into her stomach, but actually poured the water into the space.

"Okay, I'm done." Qi Qiandie wiped her lips, turned the bottle upside down, made the mouth of the bottle face the ground, and shook it lightly. After making sure that no more water came out, she threw the bottle to the boy and said : "Brother, tell me about you."

Fearing that the teenager would take care of her teeth again, Qi Qiandie decided to change the topic to something more interesting—for example, an unmarried couple getting to know each other's hobbies.

"Me? Little sister, what do you want to know? If you want to know, just ask, as long as you want to know, I will tell you." Although the young man has just come out of the rivers and lakes and is relatively innocent and romantic, he has read many romance novels. He still knows what it means when a girl asks a boy, especially her fiancé, these questions.

"Brother... Hey, stop yelling like a big brother or a little sister, you yell like a stranger." Now that she has made up her mind to use this thigh to go to the high-level map, Qi Qiandie doesn't mind being sweet-talking or something, "I My surname is Qi, my name is Qiandie, for Qiandie of a thousand butterflies, the eldest brother can call me Qiandie."

"Qiandie? Good name, really cute, really suitable for you." The young man looked at Qi Qiandie with a bright smile, and his heart felt hot. For some reason, he remembered the girl who had a light figure last night although he couldn't remember his appearance clearly. A beautiful woman like a butterfly flying among flowers.

Fortunately, Qi Qiandie didn't know what the young man was thinking, otherwise he would have replied, "That's necessary. The physics book said that under the same volume of objects, the density of the object determines the weight of the object. If you really like that Next time, I can try to add hydrogen or other gases, which are less dense than air, to ensure that it is not only as light as a butterfly, but it can even fly like a butterfly."

"Big brother, what's your name?" Qi Qiandie tilted her head and looked at the boy shyly.

"My name is Fu Yao."