Social animals don't deserve love

"Anwu? Anwu, wake up, did you have a nightmare?"

The gentle voice awakened the panic and helplessness, and Ango Sakaguchi suddenly opened his eyes and got up to look around.

—Fortunately, she is still...

The heavy breathing gradually calmed down, and the sore corners of the eyes slowly recovered.He held his wife's hand that covered himself with clothes and approached her, and the sweet citrus smell exuded faintly: "Sorry, I had a nightmare and dreamed that you left. No matter how I searched, I couldn't find you again, which made me feel very sad despair."

Her hands... are a little cold.

"It's just a dream..." She smiled and lowered her eyes to straighten the corners of his clothes: "What do you want to write today?"

"I don't write anything, can I accompany you to do housework?" Sakaguchi Ango couldn't help but said to his wife when he remembered the vague dream: "Is there anything uncomfortable recently? Go for a physical examination?"

Walking to the closet of the bedroom, the woman who was about to get into it answered with a buzzing smile: "I'm fine, why do I need a physical examination? I don't want to go. If you have nothing to do, come with me to buy ingredients. The housework has already been done."

The little complaint with a little anger was like being coquettish, her white and slender fingers brushed against the dark fabric, revealing a soft vein on the wrist that seemed to be easily broken.

How did Fubuki get so thin?

In a daze, she packed up the neatly folded thin blanket and walked out of the room. After a while, she came back with a cup: "Don't drink cold water, and don't ask for coffee. You need to have a good rest."

"Get up quickly and drink the medicine. After drinking, you can sleep for a while."

Such a conversation seemed to have happened before, but he couldn't remember when it was.

After taking the potion and drinking it obediently, and then returning the cup to her, Ango Sakaguchi followed his wife and refused to move, as if he would lose her track if he didn't pay attention.

"Why do you keep staring at me? Is there something inappropriate?" She really noticed her husband's strange gaze, and asked with her back turned to him while busy with the housework at hand.Ango Sakaguchi quickly looked away, persisted for three seconds and then turned back: "No, I just want to see you for a while."

- Fear of never seeing you again.

The young man was stunned by the roar that suddenly appeared in his mind, and his whole body seemed a little softer: "Chuixue?"

"Huh?" She responded.

So it was just a dream, right?

He lowered his head and wanted to support himself to stand up. He forgot that he was not wearing glasses, and the result was an error in distance recognition. Small table.

"Ah..." In the not-so-big bedroom, paper balls, pieces of paper, and stacks of washi paper were scattered around, and pens and inks dyed a round pattern on the tatami.

The clumsy husband finally turned himself over and sat down again, looking at the mess on the floor, he was at a loss: "Sorry, I seem to have caused you trouble."

"Pfft—!" She turned her face to the side and lowered her head to laugh, then turned back and squatted down to sort out the mess he created page by page: "Really, I told you not to stay up late to work, and you are not obedient when you are sick and recuperating." , I won’t clean up for you next time!”

Saying so, the movement of picking up the paper was gentle and gentle, as if he was afraid of breaking something.

"Sorry, sorry, I can actually..." Before he finished speaking, he stepped on the ink and slid down again in a hurry to save himself, lying down on the tatami mat, wishing he could not move.

Just... it's too much!leave!Face!up!

She stood up and walked to him, stretched out her hand and feigned anger, and said, "Just let you lie here, the more you help, the more you help..."

Ango Sakaguchi was pulled up by her, and he went around the floor and reported that he was placed on the sofa in the living room, covering another thin quilt with hot water.

He remembered that the reason why he stayed home in broad daylight and didn't go to work seemed to be... who was sick?

Oh yes, I'm sick.

His wife, Fubuki Sakaguchi, had just tidied up the kitchen and living room. She could have had a rest, but because of the trouble he created temporarily, she couldn't live in peace.

"Is there anything I can do for you? Let me do something for you!"

The man nestled in the sofa was terribly depressed, like a poor social animal beaten by reality.

"You can help me think about what to eat at night, so that we will know what to buy when we go to the market." Her voice was a little far away, and Ango Sakaguchi hurriedly sat up from a curled up position and stretched his neck to look into the bedroom... okay, okay exist.

"Hmm..." He mumbled a reply, and his heart, which was beating violently because of the nightmare, slowly slowed down.

The little purple pot in a nightmare is just a nightmare.

"Is it okay to eat stewed fish at night?" He then remembered the reason for the scene just now: "Chuuxue, have you seen my glasses?"

"Yesterday you hit the floor and stepped on it while washing your face in the bathroom, forgot?" She walked out of the room holding two stacks of papers: "From now on, you are not allowed to bring work into the bedroom, the study is not enough for you to toss about."

"But there is no you in the study, if you can't see it, you will feel very lonely." He apologized like a civet cat who made a mistake, raising the cup above his head: "I'm sorry, can you stay with me in the study?"

She sighed helplessly and laughed: "I won't go to your study, just in case there is something that needs to be kept secret!"

"No," Ango Sakaguchi hastily put down his cup and sat up straight to defend himself: "There is nothing that you can't let you know, everything about me and my family, whatever you want to know!"

As he said that, he got up and took his wife's hand and walked towards the study. Behind the door was a tall bookshelf and a sea of ​​wisdom crystallization.

The black-haired young man touched the spine of the book one by one with a trace of fanaticism and tightened his wife: "This is..."

His wife followed him with a indulgent smile and listened carefully to what he had to say.It was like looking at a naughty child, the smile remained unchanged from beginning to end.

— like a mask on your face.

"You bought this book when you graduated, right?" Ango Sakaguchi looked down at Fubuki Sakaguchi: "I remember it was in the bookstore in front of the school."

While talking, he froze for a moment: "Chuixue? Why don't you speak?"

"I'm listening to you." She immediately responded gently without any hesitation.

The young assistant officer of the Supernatural Secret Service Division ignored the surprise that was floating in his heart, and continued the topic.

An hour later, Mr. Sakaguchi even recognized where his private money was hidden, and felt that he had been forgiven by his wife.

Wait, why do you feel guilty?Why is there a sense of urgency of 'too late' no matter what to do?

"Ango?" Her call interrupted her thinking again, and Ango Sakaguchi withdrew the thoughts that were about to radiate: "I'm here, am I going out? I'm going to get the shopping bag."

"I'll wait for you at the door."

She stood on one foot in the hallway and hopped around, hooking her finger on the heel of her shoe and lifting it. After changing her shoes, she tapped the toe of her shoe lightly before walking forward and opening the door to wait quietly.

This is an ordinary day in autumn, the sun is shining on the body with the lingering power of late summer, but the wind has already brought a cold breath.Stuffing along the side of the road with shopping bags is horribly distant and never seems to have happened.

Satisfied, Ango Sakaguchi walked side by side with his wife on the community road leading to the market. There were few pedestrians and no vehicles passing by in the afternoon, as if there were only the two of them in an empty city.

"Oh! Mrs. Sakaguchi, I haven't seen you for a while, are you finally back from the hospital?" The neighbors greeted them warmly when they saw them, and the hostess pulled her husband's sleeve and nodded to them: "Yes, I just came back not long ago. "

Ango Sakaguchi thought she was talking about himself, and complained softly after walking out of the community: "This is the only time there will be no traffic jam." He remembered the embarrassing situation of rushing to the office every morning before he was sick and recuperated, and couldn't help shaking his head with a wry smile.

——It doesn't seem right, does he really rush to the office in the morning?

The sleeve was gently pulled, and the young man gave up thinking again and focused on looking up and calling his wife: "What are you in a daze for, turn left."

The market is located in a shopping street, and many merchants choose to close their doors to rest after a busy morning—the next peak time of crowds is before dusk, and there are still several hours before now.

"Eat stewed fish at night?" Fubuki Sakaguchi leaned over and glanced at the fresh ingredients swimming in the cement pool to confirm the recipe. Her husband followed up and nodded vigorously: "Well, I can help!"

"Then buy a fish, please clean it up."

She pointed at the "lucky guy" and smiled at the fishmonger. The enthusiastic boss gave a long answer, stepped on the black rubber boots to catch the fish with a net, and smashed the wooden stick in the other hand on the back of the head.

As if the back of his head was also smashed, Sakaguchi Ango took a step back, not forgetting to pull his wife: "It looks so painful..."

"Why don't you take it home and clean it up?" The obvious teasing almost overflowed from his smile, and Mr. Sakaguchi, who was feeling uncomfortable, turned around and stopped watching the fishmonger destroying the nerve tube with an iron needle: "I'm afraid I'll break my gut... ..."

That way you can only eat a pot of bitter meat.Although far-fetched, this reason finally made the rejection look decent.

Destroy the nerves of the fish, drain the blood, then cut open the belly to take out the internal organs, cut off the fish body and head, cut it into three parts with the spine as the boundary, and then take it home and clean it for cooking.

Obviously it was just a fish that was powerless to be slaughtered, but his palms were covered in cold sweat as if he was seeing a murder scene for the first time.

"Sheng Hui! Ma'am, this is your change, go slowly!"

The fishmonger was very skillful, and a black plastic bag came quickly.The inside is bulging, and the protruding part is full of imagination—a severed bone, or a tail?It may be a fish head, but of course it is more likely to be a cut piece of meat.

"Well……"

The smell of blood lingered in his nose for a long time, and Ango Sakaguchi couldn't help covering his mouth and nose and ran to the other side of the flower pond to retch a few times.There was the sound of clothes being rubbed behind her, and a cool palm touched her forehead: "Still uncomfortable? Go to the hospital for a while."

"It's okay, sorry."

He touched the palm on his forehead and tightened it: "If you don't go to the hospital, you won't be able to see you if you go to the hospital. I don't want to go."

"Don't leave me, okay? No matter where you are, don't leave me alone." Ou Lai's faint and broken emotions could not be explained, and he no longer cared about the occasional passers-by walking around and pulled his wife into his arms In the middle, the breathing became short again: "I'm sorry, please, don't disappear from my side."

"What are you talking about? Am I not, have I always... been by your side?"

The woman's docile voice seemed to stick behind her ears, and the smell of citrus seemed to cover up something.The cold wind suddenly blew up, and the fallen leaves piled up on the roadside were rolled into the air, and the yellow leaves scattered one after another were like cherry snow blown away by the wind.

The cool fingers in the palm and the thin figure in the arms are not illusory, Ango Sakaguchi suppressed the indescribable panic in his heart, let go of his hands and frowned and smiled: "Sorry, I'm probably confused, let's go home? "

"Well, okay, go home." She showed a contented expression, and the word "go home" made people smile, and saw his chest hurt: "I will never work overtime again, and I will go home when the time comes. OK?"

"I will bring you back a flower every day, and tell you I love you. If you want, we will have a baby. Of course, if you don't want to, forget it." Talking about her expectations for the future, she walked beside her earnestly Be quiet and listen.

Turning his head to confirm her figure again and again, his high hanging heart gradually fell back.

Returning to the small one-story apartment where they have been living since they got married, Ango Sakaguchi happily wandered into the kitchen and insisted on helping.Maybe it was because his condition was much better than before, Fubuki Sakaguchi pointed to him a place at the door that would not hinder his activities: "Go and sit there and pack the vegetables, you will need them later!"

Automatically thinking of peeling garlic as an important job, someone took out the most serious posture and carefully cleaned all kinds of vegetables as if they were facing an enemy.Don't look at the battered and pitted skin to probably show "appreciation" for his work.

"The cleaned vegetables are washed in water and then cut into equal sized pieces."

The right reminder came in time, so that he wouldn't let him sit still and lose his mind.

"Okay, what shape should you cut it into?" Sakaguchi Ango gestured with the kitchen knife, not knowing where to start.

The long-haired woman standing side by side stared at the white and curly fish in the pot and responded: "How many shapes can you cut? Feel free."

The shape is really not important, the key is that the size is uniform so that there will be no familiarity.

Dinner is served at dusk, a pot of stewed fish, vegetables, and rice.Warm and homely, the quiet and peaceful atmosphere fills the small living room.

After the meal, he rushed to wash the dishes. He put a sink of water and squeezed a few drops of detergent. The pots and pans were carefully wiped and rinsed, and they were left on the dish rack to be dried and then stuffed into the disinfection cabinet.It’s not that there is no dishwasher at home, but it’s a pity that people who haven’t been in the kitchen much before don’t know where it is, and even if they find it, they won’t use it. It’s better to do it manually, which looks sincere and clean.

"Huh... Fortunately, the tableware was not broken."

Mr. Sakaguchi let out a sigh of relief, looking at the neatly arranged bowls and chopsticks, he felt a sense of accomplishment.

It seems that he might consider developing a new hobby about cooking, just like he once complained about his friends... huh?

——Who am I complaining about?

"Can't Mr. XX develop some beneficial hobbies outside of XX? For example, sports, academics, or cooking, ah no, forget it."

Who and who is sitting on the other side of the dimly lit teak bar?

What did the dark-haired boy answer?

"Crack...!"

The spoon in his hand slipped to the ground and shattered, his wife heard the sound and said, "Ango, is your hand alright?"

"Ah!" His pupils dilated as if he was frightened and panted hard: "No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I..."

"Don't move." She lowered her head into the kitchen and knelt down in front of him, picked up the broken spoon and placed it in her palm: "Be careful of getting hurt."

The large pieces of debris were quickly cleaned up, and the remaining debris was swept into the trash can: "Okay. Do you want to read a book, or do you do something? Go for a walk?"

The desire to survive told him that he should choose to stay at home and read a book, he followed his intuition and got his wife's gentle touch after answering.She walked very close, almost leaning on him, the cool orange smell seemed to cover the ice: "Then go to a book, let's read the book you picked out this afternoon."

The idea of ​​two people reading a philosophy book together is a disaster of genius.But he didn't dare to refuse. Under the dim light, his wife's cheeks were too pale, even vaguely covered with an ominous blue-gray.

Fearful and unwilling to leave, stubbornly wandering in the place where the trajectories of actions overlap the most.

"Blowing snow... I used to..." What kind of illness did I have?

Changing the words already on his lips, he forced a smile and asked, "Which store did you entrust the glasses to? I can't remember."

"It's still the original place. After it's ready, it will be delivered directly to your door. Don't you worry about going to see it? Or can't you see it clearly and make you a little anxious?"

She took the book from the shelf and said, "It's okay, I'll read it to you. Don't forget to take your medicine later."

"Okay." Without glasses, he can only see people or things within close range, and he can't even go out alone.

The wife took out the book and sat beside her, reading slowly along the bookmarks.He didn't listen to those profound thoughts at all, and his mind was full of the image of her right in front of him.Like an animal that mistakenly thought she had stepped into a trap, she experienced panic and fear in her voice and gradually returned to calm, and once again had to confirm that this was just an ordinary day that was no different from usual.

I just got sick and recuperated at home, yes, that must be the case.Fubuki won't lie to me, she never hides anything from me.

Thinking of this, he involuntarily stretched out his hand to his wife, and she leaned against his arms as gently and obediently as in memory, and the cold citrus smell rose.

With limited vision and sharper sense of touch and smell, Ango Sakaguchi couldn't help but bury his face in his wife's long silky hair: "Will Fubuki feel bored with a boring man like me all day long?"

"Why?" She put down the book, raised her hand and brushed his face lightly: "I'm very happy to keep you at home like this, and I won't be bored at all."

"That's really great, otherwise I don't know what to do for you." Clenched her hand that touched his cheek and moved to his lips to kiss lightly. The cool temperature made his eye sockets red for no reason: " Don't leave me alone."

"I won't leave you behind." Responding to his neurotic repeated request again, Fubuki Sakaguchi smiled patiently and let her husband touch her, lowering her eyelids to cover her pupils without highlights: "As long as you don't feel bored, I can follow you anywhere."

"I'll listen to what you say, and I'll do whatever you want."

Like a drowning man clinging to a driftwood, Ango Sakaguchi hugged his wife tightly.

"Really?" She chuckled close to his ear, "I don't believe it."

"It's true!" He was extremely firm, afraid that she would turn around and leave after a moment of hesitation.Fubuki Sakaguchi put his arms around her husband's neck and smiled briskly: "Really, I don't believe it either. Who told you that you promised so much in the past."

"Unless you can trust me no matter what anyone says to you...or I will never listen to you again!"

With a bit of innocuous willfulness in his coquettishness, Ango Sakaguchi thought... If he doesn't believe in Fubuki, who else can he trust?She is his wife who loves each other, and even his last relative in this world.

"Okay, I believe you, no matter what others say, I will only believe you." He swore so hard that he wanted to slap his chest as a guarantee, and she lowered her head and said, "You have been training at home for a while, so there must be someone coming to the door recently... I I don't like having strangers come into our house, it's scary, you go and drive them away."

The wife who will be scared by strangers is also very cute. Ango Sakaguchi nodded seriously and agreed: "Okay, no matter who comes, I will drive them out. Don't be afraid, I can protect you."

Then she raised her head and smiled again: "Well, then I will trust you one last time."

The fact that the youngest official of the Ministry of Internal Affairs has not been on duty for several days in a row cannot be dismissed lightly.However, considering the pressure from the "Five Decays of Heaven and Man" incident on the top and bottom of the Supernatural Secret Service Division, and the subsequent troubles brought about by Fukuchi Sakurachi, Ango Sakaguchi, who supported the operation of the entire department and secretly cooperated with Osamu Dazai to direct the operations of the detective agency The need to recuperate has become a natural thing that couldn't be more natural.

Especially...his wife Fubuki Sakaguchi was seriously ill until she passed away, but she couldn't wait for her husband to show up. Feeling guilty, Taneda Shantou sent his favorite student back for vacation—bereavement leave.

Ango's state is not suitable for continuing to withstand high-pressure and high-intensity work in the short term. Without him, there will be no successors in the Secret Service Division.

But for a few days in a row, Ango really stayed at home and didn't care about world affairs... This is too strange.It's not that he didn't call, but unfortunately no one answered.The monitoring personnel said that the water and electricity meters of Sakaguchi's house were operating normally, and it was confirmed that Mr. Sakaguchi did not have any accidents.

Although resting, it doesn't seem to be Ango's style not to answer the phone and disappear. After three or four days in dire straits, Chief Taneda decided to entrust Dazai Osamu of the Armed Detective Agency to check the situation again.It's not that he doesn't want to visit the door in person, it's that he has a serious injury and needs to give instructions, and he really has no skills at his disposal.

In fact, he was afraid. He was afraid of seeing the resentful or dead eyes of his disciples. He couldn't bear Ango's almost collapsed expression when he handed over the bone jars in the office that day.Young couples are separated by yin and yang, think about it in their own shoes, touch their chests with fire on the top of the farm, and sigh with their heads up——life!

Just ask Ango's friends to check it out, it's best if there's nothing wrong, and if there's something wrong...

Sakaguchi Fubuki's death record is quite confusing.Although he commissioned an armed detective agency and failed to find out the clues, but as a person who has dealt with crimes of different abilities all his life, his intuition told him that something was wrong.

The course of her disease developed so fast that even if it was cancer, it would not be out of control in less than a year. This did not match the doctor's record of "having a strong will to survive and being relatively optimistic."

And the actual dose of chemoradiotherapy she received was not quite right—too high.The dosage prescribed by the doctor is very different from the investigation found after the event, even a healthy adult can't afford this amount, let alone a weak woman who is already in poor condition?

However, it is inconvenient to inform Ango Sakaguchi of these suspicious details before the investigation is clear, lest he act impulsively in a hurry.From this point of view alone, Zhongtian Shantouhuo would rather his disciples rest for a few more days.

A day later, a tall, thin, black-haired man in a sand-colored trench coat with bandages on his limbs knocked on the door of Sakaguchi's house.The host blocked the door vigilantly: "Who?"

"Ango, it's me, your old friend. I'll come and see you." Out of rare humanitarianism, he barely suppressed his cynicism.

However, the people inside the door completely ignored the old friendship, and still lowered their voices: "I don't know who you are, hurry up, I'm going to rest."

The hand touching the door lock stopped, and the man chuckled lightly: "Don't be kidding, Ango, when did you learn to play pranks? It sounds like that."

Ango Sakaguchi behind the door was not joking with him, he fumbled all over his body looking for pockets in a panic, only to realize that he hadn't seen his mobile phone for several days... well, apart from his glasses, he didn't even see his mobile phone trace.

Looking back at his wife hiding in the bedroom, he saw only a piece of sleeve that wasn't covered.She must have stayed at home alone for too long, and was so frightened by this sudden appearance of a strange man that she didn't dare to come out.

"I don't know you, I can't open the door, so hurry up and go."

The voice from inside the door made Osamu Dazai lose his eyes.

The friend was sent home by him on the day he received the news of his wife's death, and he personally confirmed that there was no possibility of outside invasion or Tibetans in the room.That is to say, Ango Sakaguchi, who stayed at home to cultivate, is in a closed state, and no one can hurt him except himself.

After a few days without external force, Ango Sakaguchi lost his memory?How can it be!

He immediately changed his strategy: "Well, you really don't know me, I thought I could be friends with Mr. Sakaguchi, but I didn't expect... Mr. Tanada asked me to come and have a look, and remind you that it's time to return to work! "

"understood."

The door was pulled open a crack, and the light hit the eyes of the person behind the door.Dazai stretched his neck and glanced from far to near, and the door quickly closed: "You have seen me, I am fine, and I will return to my post in a few days, please tell Mr. Farmer not to worry."

How funny... The man who was ruthlessly rejected raised his hand and stroked his chin.

How can it be possible for a person who is confirmed to have died of illness to reappear in the world?If you really want to discuss the operability of this matter, you have to ask Dostoevsky who always insisted that the remaining half page of the 'book' was destroyed.

I hope those idiots in the parliament can live up to it and not rush to let him go. Once this Russian is allowed to escape, who knows how many waves he can make.