Let go of the past

At ten o'clock in the evening New York time, on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, at the Mandarin Oriental Hotel.

The curved white leather sofa is in the center of the living room. Outside the window is a large group of lush banyan trees in Central Park. The Bethesda Fountain Square in the distance is hidden in the forest. The Isle of Man is brightly lit in the middle of the night. The reinforced concrete creates indifference and temptation. The center of the world that keeps pace with each other, here is heaven, and it is also hell.

There was an unfinished meal on the dining table by the window, Ji Bing sat on the chair next to him with his legs bent, his expression indifferent and somewhat confused, the phone was held in his hand, and his eyes cast over from time to time , vaguely as if waiting for something.

About ten minutes later, the pitch-black screen suddenly lit up. Ji Bing broke free from his gloomy and anxious mood as if his acupoints were unlocked instantly, his eyes became clear again, and he moved his thumb quickly to open it.

"Hey, have you finished the meeting?" Li Ru's rough and unrestrained voice was heard across the ocean amidst the noisy background.

"Well, are you looking for me? Is there something wrong?"

"It was something, but it's gone now. But read the text message, you said it was a coincidence, who would have thought that I would have a table with Li Ziqing for dinner?" Li Ru's speech was always unfocused. Move faster than your brain.

Ji Bing frowned, exhaled a breath of depression from his lungs, and asked him with a sinking heart: "What's going on?"

"Oh," was asked to the top of his head, no matter how inconspicuous Li Ru was, he knew that he should tell the whole thing: "Isn't I forced to come to work in our company? I attended a business dinner last night, and I didn't expect the opposite It's actually Li Ziqing's company. You know it at the wine table. Can you not drink? We toasted each other a few glasses. I was afraid that he couldn't drink, so I sent a text message to ask you, but you didn't reply me. Later, Li Ziqing I went to the toilet halfway, but I didn’t come back, and I couldn’t reach you on the phone, so I called you when I was in a hurry, but who knew that your assistant picked me up, saying that you were in a meeting abroad.”

Listening to what he said, Ji Bing leaned back in the chair uncomfortably, paused, and said quietly, "At around eight o'clock this morning, I have a call from Li Ziqing."

"Ah? Oh," Li Ruyi paused again in surprise, and continued, "Then I don't know, but I contacted him later, and he said he was in a hurry, so he left before he could say hello. I asked him what was the matter , I hung up when he ignored me. You also know that we have nothing to say, and I don't want to make fun of myself, but from his tone, he seems to be fine. If you are worried, just call him and ask."

"Hit." Ji Bing said lightly, "He didn't answer."

"I guess you're busy." Li Ru didn't know that the relationship between the two was on thin ice, so he speculated wildly, "Then you can fight later."

"Then I'll hang up first."

"Wait," Li Ru stopped him and asked, "When are you going back to China?"

"Is something wrong?"

"Isn't it Xiaobai's birthday next week? I was abroad a few years ago, and I wasn't there every time he had his birthday. I'm sorry. I want to make up for him this year. Why don't you come?"

Ji Bing said in a perfunctory tone, "Let's talk about it."

"Hey, what's going on?" Li Ru's tone was filled with astonishment and confusion: "When did you and Xiaobai become so estranged? The three of us have grown up with each other since wearing open crotch pants, so we can't be so ruthless." ah."

"No problem," Ji Bing said coldly, "Busy."

After hanging up Li Ru's phone, Ji Bing got up and walked to the window, quietly overlooking the night view of the Isle of Man at his feet. The tall buildings were lined with bright lights and shadows, and if the vision was a little farther, you could see a few floating on the broad Hudson River. The cruise ship gave him the illusion of returning to the Lujia Riverside Hotel in S City.

Letting his thoughts drift aimlessly for a few minutes, Ji Bing picked up the phone again, found the number that was ranked second in the call log, stared at it for a moment, and dialed the other party.

At around nine o'clock in the morning Beijing time, a private hospital in S City.

Li Ziqing was sitting beside the hospital bed, tightly holding Uncle Li's skinny left hand. After only about a month, the disease, with its destructive momentum, tortured the originally hale and hearty old man to the point of disfigurement.

The acacia tree outside the window has sprouted new buds, and the sunlight is split into irregular beams of light by the branches, shining in through the glass window, and printing mottled broken shadows on the smooth marble floor.

The door of the ward creaked and was pushed open from the outside. Gu Xien walked in slowly, followed by another figure.

Li Ziqing didn't realize it, and continued to maintain a motionless posture, tightly holding Uncle Li's hand, staring fixedly at his shriveled and sallow face under the oxygen mask.Moving down the line of sight, the white and flawless thin chest covered by the mask can hardly be seen any ups and downs, the breathing is laboriously and weakly maintained, and even the white mist on the mask is very faint.

"Mr. Li," Gu Xien approached, and said softly, "You haven't closed your eyes all night, go and have a rest."

Li Ziqing shook his head, stared blankly at Uncle Li and said, "He's out of time. If I take a look now, I'll miss one..."

"Brother." Huang Jingzhi, who was following behind Gu Xien, took off his sunglasses, glanced over the hospital bed, and finally couldn't bear to turn his face away, and said in disbelief: "...how is it possible? At first I thought it was you who was following me I am joking……"

Gu Xien patted him on the shoulder, stretched out his hand to pull a chair, and said to him, "Sit down."

Huang Jingzhi shook his head quickly, walked around to the other side of the hospital bed, carefully held Uncle Li's other hand on the bedside, his throat choked, and he raised his head and asked Gu Xi'en: "Doctor, what do you say?"

Gu Xi'en didn't answer, but just said lightly: "Just spend more time with him these two days."

Huang Jingzhi was stunned, and immediately said with a little excitement: "Why don't you go abroad to see? Just give up like this?"

Gu Xien sighed: "I contacted the professor of Anderson Cancer Center in the United States a week ago. The situation is not optimistic. The cancer cells have already transferred to the brain tissue. And Uncle Li said that he doesn't want to be a lonely ghost who died in a foreign land. Wherever you are born, you will be there."

Huang Jingzhi lowered his head dejectedly, only the beeping beeping of the heart rate meter in the quiet ward made one's heart tighten.

Li Ziqing stood up from the chair quickly, and maintained a movement for a long time that made his legs and feet sore and numb. He staggered twice. Gu Xien firmly supported him and asked him, "Are you going to rest?"

"No..." Li Ziqing's voice was dry and hoarse, "I want to get some hot water for..." He was a little incoherent, as if his brain was not enough, "Get some hot water...Wipe Uncle Li's hands, his hands Dry and cold, neither warm nor hot..."

Gu Xien looked at him, put his hand on his shoulder, and said softly, "I'll do it."

"Thank you..." Li Ziqing murmured.

Gu Xien patted him on the back, turned around and walked towards the bathroom on the right side of the ward.

Li Ziqing turned to the ward again, but did not sit down, his left hand was weakly supporting the bedside table, and his gaze was cast somewhere outside the window.

"Is your phone ringing?" Suddenly, Huang Jingzhi asked.

Li Ziqing slowly retracted his gaze, took out the phone from his pocket, but didn't answer it, just stared at the screen without saying a word, letting it vibrate noisily in his hand, making his palms feel numb, until there was no answer. Perception, and finally stop by itself.

Huang Jingzhi's mind was clear, he only lingered on him unexpectedly for a moment, and didn't ask why the other party didn't answer.

Gu Xien took the warm water and brought it over, and handed it to Li Ziqing, who took it slowly, put the basin on the bedside table, wrung out the towel after it was soaked in water, sat down again, picked up Uncle Li's hand, and began to carefully Wipe it carefully again.

"The phone is ringing." Gu Xien looked at the vibrating phone on the bedside table and said to Li Ziqing.

"Never mind." Li Ziqing replied calmly.

Huang Jingzhi on the opposite side gave Gu Xien a probing look, but the next moment, his own cell phone started singing directly.

Huang Jingzhi didn't have time to close the expression on his face, so he hurriedly retreated to the window, fearing to break the quiet atmosphere here, then pulled out the mobile phone from the pocket of the wide denim jacket, saw the caller ID on it, his face suddenly became ugly, even somewhat It means gnashing of teeth.

Gu Xien looked at him suspiciously, Huang Jingzhi turned around, turned his back to the hospital bed and pressed the connection button. Before the other party could speak, he cursed in a low voice: "Are you fucking sick?"

After waiting for a sentence or two, Huang Jingzhi's face became more gloomy, his shoulders heaved up and down, as if he was desperately suppressing his anger, he paused, and said coldly, "Get out."

When he put away his cell phone and turned around, his face still hadn't adjusted. It was the first time Gu Xien saw him expressing his emotions, so he asked in surprise, "What's wrong?"

"It's okay." Huang Jingzhi replied casually, and added a sentence after finishing it: "A rubbish bastard."

Suddenly there was a slight noise on the hospital bed, pulling the eyes of the three at once. Li Ziqing got up quickly, bent over and approached, and called tremblingly: "Uncle Li?"

Uncle Li slowly opened his cloudy eyes, the eyeballs could no longer move freely, and he tried hard to turn his head to look in Li Ziqing's direction.

"Take off the oxygen mask first." Gu Xian said, "He wants to talk to you."

Li Ziqing stretched out his hand slowly, and took off the oxygen mask from the old man's face. Uncle Li breathed out tremblingly, turned his face sideways with great effort, his lips moved, trying to make a sound with great difficulty, but his speech was already incoherent , can only read out word by word: "... Qing... Qing..."

"No..." Li Ziqing tightly clenched his hands on his chest, and the emotions he had tried to control before collapsed in an instant, crying hysterically: "Uncle Li... don't go... okay?"

As if he suddenly borrowed strength from God, Uncle Li turned his bony palm over and grabbed Li Ziqing's wrist tightly. He uttered a few messy words: "...Qing...Qing, you...happy...I..." Uncle Li's words got stuck in his throat, he opened his mouth and took a few breaths, Li Ziqing cried while thinking He went to grab the oxygen mask and put it on for others, but his hands were tightly held by Uncle Li as if he was dying, and he exhausted the last bit of strength in his life, and said to him vigorously: "...Uncle loves you...you... Okay... okay?"

Li Ziqing stared blankly at the old man, as if he had lost the ability to receive words, until the heart rate monitor issued a series of regular and sharp alarms, and Gu Xien behind him hurriedly pressed the emergency bell on the bedside, and then turned and ran to the door of the ward, anxiously Calling the doctor.

Doctors and nurses rushed in in the blink of an eye, Li Ziqing was pushed to the side, hit the coffee table with his body, almost fell to the ground.

Gu Xien supported him again, looked at his dull eyes, squeezed his shoulders hard, and comforted him against his will: "Don't worry... I have been rescued before..."

The mobile phone placed on the bedside table vibrated again suddenly. The nurse grabbed the mobile phone and handed it over, and told the three people standing aside: "Patient's family members, please wait outside first."

Gu Xien helped to take the phone, Huang Jingzhi walked in front and opened the door, and the three of them exited the ward together.

Standing in the corridor of the hospital, Gu Xien handed the mobile phone that was still vibrating persistently in front of Li Ziqing, and the other party took it, glanced at the caller ID on it expressionlessly, reached out and pressed the hang up button.

Ji Bing was standing by the window holding his mobile phone. It was past eleven o'clock in the middle of the night in New York, and he hadn't closed his eyes for nearly 24 hours, and half of the time was spent in a highly concentrated meeting.

But at this moment, he still didn't feel sleepy. The phone calls that were hung up one after another were like slaps louder and louder, slapping his brain more clearly.

And angry.

And under this anger, there is vague anxiety, nervousness and panic, the heart seems to be grasped and tightened bit by bit, the torment is intensified inch by inch, the perception is infinitely magnified, and the troubled thoughts are entangled Form a group and drive without hesitation to the ominous territory in the unknown domain.

He took a deep breath, turned around, walked to the curved sofa and sat down. The room was not turned on, and the only light came from the neon lights outside the window, but it couldn't reach the sofa, so his side face was completely covered in half. In the half-dark light, his expression was gloomy and indifferent.

The whole room was soaked in dead darkness, Ji Bing stared at the mobile phone on the coffee table motionlessly, struggling with all kinds of chaotic emotions in his heart, so he didn't know how long it took, maybe a few minutes, maybe half an hour, he finally Finally, as if he had made up his mind, he reached out to pick up the phone, paused with his fingers on the screen, and dialed the call to the person on the other side of the ocean again.

The door of the ward was opened, and after half an hour of alternating between hope and disappointment, the door of the ward was finally opened again.

Li Ziqing pushed away the doctor at the door without hesitation, and rushed towards the bed, but the next moment, his whole body froze, and then he staggered two steps, his lips began to tremble uncontrollably, and he looked at the doctor in a daze. Looking at the figure on the hospital bed not far away, covered from head to toe with a white cloth.

"No..." He completely collapsed. Even though he had a premonition long ago, being hit in the head by the cruel reality still made him feel like falling into an ice cave in an instant.

"No..." He rushed to the hospital bed, and then completely collapsed on the ground. His whole body was like a helpless grass in the hurricane, trembling with the wind, unable to grasp his rough fate.

"Please!" He cried hysterically towards the medical staff who had begun to put away the medical equipment: "Please save him, he still wants to live! He still wants to live! Please!"

"Mr. Li!" Gu Xien rushed forward, stopped Li Ziqing's hands that were struggling to grab the doctor's arm, and tried to calm down but said in a trembling tone: "Don't get excited, let Uncle Li go quietly."

Li Ziqing closed his eyes, then turned around, leaned on the edge of the hospital bed with one hand, covered his face with the other, and finally burst into tears.

Although the doctors and nurses have seen such scenes a lot, they still feel a little bit of pity because they have a strong heart.

"A person cannot be brought back to life after death. Cancer is already tormenting people. Now that the old man is gone, he can be regarded as completely freed from the sea of ​​suffering."

Gu Xien nodded, Huang Jingzhi stepped forward, looked at the figure on the ward with the same grief, then moved his eyes to Li Ziqing, sighed heavily for a long time, walked over and pulled him up.

"Get up first." Huang Jingzhi said to him, "Uncle Li doesn't want to see you like this either."

Li Ziqing ignored it, so Gu Xien also stretched out his hand, and the two of them worked together to help Li Ziqing up, who was limp, and took him to the sofa in front of the ward to sit down.

"The phone is ringing again." Xu Shi wanted to deliberately find a topic to divert from. He didn't want to continue watching Li Ziqing sinking into the abyss of grief. Huang Jingzhi heard the buzzing vibration in his pocket, and reminded him.

However, Li Ziqing seemed to be unable to hear any sounds from the human world, and sat motionless. Huang Jingzhi simply took out the mobile phone for others, handed it to him, and said to him: "I'm so anxious to find you, you just pick it up." Let's go."

Li Ziqing glanced at the other party, his eyes were red, like a fierce but powerless little beast, he slowly raised his hand to take the phone, but the next moment he raised his arm, and then there was a loud bang, the phone fell to the ground, and the screen shattered Cracked, the bell tremblingly broke at the end, and hung up completely.

Gu Xien glanced at Huang Jing, Huang Jingzhi: "..."

"Okay." The air condensed for a few minutes before Gu Xi'en said to Li Ziqing: "Take it easy, don't be too sad. You still need to deal with Uncle Li's affairs. Death is like a lamp going out, but everything Those who are alive should live well."

Li Ziqing covered his face with his hands, leaned back on the sofa, and said nothing, as if his soul followed Uncle Li to the bank of the Santu River.

After a long while, he heard his hoarse voice, barely able to hear the original voice, and said slowly, "...Thank you, I will."

The author has something to say: the few people in the ward, except Uncle Li, are all other people’s wives~