Can't cross by oneself

77.

Chang'an lives up to his name.Looking at her, one can imagine how she grew up in such a pure environment, with clear eyes and long hair, she is the kind of girl who needs to be protected.

Even for me, it's hard for me to get sick of her.

She carried two bags and handed one of them to me with some coyness.

You... well, here is a gift I chose for you, I hope you like it.

Auntie pretended to be surprised.

Oh, why is An An here?Have you eaten yet?

no no.

Come, come, sit down and eat together. Auntie will get you a pair of chopsticks.

Mr. Xia and I were very embarrassed to see my aunt happily entertaining after busying herself.I deliberately avoided Mr. Xia's sight and concentrated on playing with the gift in my hand.

A black gold inlaid fountain pen, heavy and nice to the touch, must be of great value.

Mr. Su, I heard Xia Xia said that you like writing articles, so I gave you a pen, you...

I love it, thank you.Just call me Sue.

She smiled sheepishly.

78.

Chang An began to come here often, not to enter the door, after all, it was not convenient for her to come in as a girl.

Stand at the door and send some soup you made yourself, gadgets you made and so on.Accidentally asked us out to take pictures.

Very delicate and gentle girl.Smiling lightly, occasionally shy, it makes people feel sweet when they look at it.It could be seen that she liked Mr. Xia very much, and she looked at him tenderly.

Mr. Xia's company has also started to receive big orders, and it really has a bright future as he expected.Mr. Xia excitedly told me about his future plans.

Jie began to prepare oral language and visa. He was preparing to fly to Mexico within two years.

Only me, cleaning the porcelain white coffee cup every day, the sun rises and the moon sets, killing time day by day.

79.

At night, people become sentimental, perhaps because the moon's tides can affect people's emotions.

I had a dream, woke up in the middle of the night, but forgot all about it.It should be an extremely sad dream, but the palpitations left a lingering feeling, throbbing and throbbing.

I touched my face, it was moist.

He got up and secretly smoked a cigarette, feeling that the depression in his chest had dissipated a lot, before returning to the bedroom.

I crawled into Mr. Xia's arms. He was in a drowsy sleep, but instinctively stretched out his arms to hug me.

I have seen the face for four years, it seems to be engraved into my life, and I want to see it for a longer time.

Bury your face into the side of his neck.

Husband, will you leave?

uh~

will you go

Um......

do you like me?

Ok.

Then why are you leaving?

He seemed to be woken up by me, and touched my head in a daze.The voice is hoarse.

What are you doing?

I shook my head.

80.

Mr. Xia, I want to go back.

go back? !no!You are not allowed to go!

Tomb-sweeping day is here, and I'm going to offer incense to my mother.

So... when will you come back.

Soon, can you come with me?

He was a little surprised, and then he was embarrassed, but nodded.

I don't remember what my mother liked, but we lived in my hometown when we were young, and there would be sweet-scented osmanthus in autumn.

I like the calmness of the laurel that fills the world, making the whole autumn sweet and greasy.Reminds me of my childhood, with its remote ease and pure mystery.

I buried my mother under a laurel tree, I think she liked it too.

Using mother's ashes to support the osmanthus tree, when the osmanthus blossoms, is her life extended?

Mom, I brought your daughter-in-law.

After letting Mr. Xia talk to Mom, I sent him away.Talk to Mom alone.

Mom, this is my favorite person.Sorry, he's a man.I didn't tell you before I was alive, because I was afraid that you would not be able to rest in peace, forgive me, and bless me, regretting that you gave birth to me.sorry.

We have been together for four years and this relationship is unacceptable and blessed by no one, including ourselves.But we still persisted, persisting until the last moment.We call it love, can you believe it?

Dad cheated on you, you taught me not to cheat on other girls, but I may not have the chance to do so.

I... I'm tired.

Mom, I'm not filial.

I said a lot in bits and pieces without logic, and I couldn't remember it myself.

81.

The weather is starting to warm up, which is the most beautiful season.The environment of this city is very good, and it is an ancient city with historical heritage.Wherever you turn, you will suddenly see a ruins.

Thick sycamores are planted on both sides of the street, with luxuriant branches and green leaves growing early, covering the sky and the sun.The sunshine in April and May penetrates the leaves and hits the ground in small pieces, like stagnant water and bright sky.

It is said that during the period of the Republic of China, a lady loved the French phoenix trees, and her husband planted the phoenix trees all over the city.

You see, the story has been handed down several times, and the whole city understands their love.

This breath makes my heart beat.I want to write a story.

82.

Chang An dressed more and more softly, her long skirt dragged the floor, and she seemed to be able to melt into the sun when she smiled.

I watched Mr. Xia stiffly go out on a date with her.And I, with a blank face, brushed and wrote on the paper.

It is about the love story between a young master and his servant during the period of the Republic of China.They were childhood sweethearts, secretly in love, and finally broke through the barriers in their hearts and came together.However, the young master was asked to marry a young lady of a similar family. The young lady was talented in literature, well-read in poetry and books, generous and extraordinary in bearing.

Servants are humbled.

The young master doesn't want to marry a young lady, and he doesn't dare to make his relationship with his servant public.

Suffering and exhausting every day and night.

The servant thought he was a drag on the young master and left one night.

The young master searched for him for a long time but to no avail, and finally married the young lady.

A few years later, the young master learned that the servant had already died under the plane tree behind the courtyard. The young master was so sad that he transplanted plane trees all over the city to commemorate the servant's death.

Later generations thought that the phoenix tree was planted by the young master for his wife, but they didn't know its true meaning.

Its name is "Indus Tomb"

I would have liked to give them a happy ending.Let the servants live, they will always be together, even if they will never be accepted by the world.

The reality is so cruel, why not get relief in the story.

But that's out of my control, their stories and thoughts are their own.All I can do is write it down.

It turns out that even in the story, we can't get relief.

83.

Are you the same?Jay asked.

I was washing the cup when my hand slipped and it broke.

I am sorry.

Nothing.

Silently cleaned up the debris.

I'm.

really.

How did you see it?

I don't know, it's just a feeling.

If you feel disgusted, I can resign.

No, I don't discriminate.

Really?

Ok.

Thank you.

Jay chuckled.You don't have to be trembling, that Mr. Xia is your lover, right?

Yes.

Alas, I hope you can go on.

How about you, why don't you have a girlfriend, you are so old.

I just feel like a good person.

Don't your parents urge you?

I've already cut ties with them.

what?

I also have a brother and a sister, it doesn't matter if I have me or not.

why?

Because I am the same.

84.

I talked a lot with Jay.Talk about how I met and fell in love with Mr. Xia, about my mother and his family, and about Chang An.

There are endless words that I want to pour out.

Four years of emotion and no one listening.I said it to Jie, and I also said it to myself.

Jay talked to me about his former lover, whom he met while working, and Jay came out for him, but he backed down.Now I can't get in touch anymore, so the unforgettable relationship is like a dream, coming and going.

We drink and comfort.

I went back very late that day.Don't even want to go back.I wander the city, going into the dark where there are lights.The city is beautiful, full of people and plane trees.

so what.