green mosquito blood

I didn't expect Zhang Qian to use this trick.

Think about it, this has been seven or eight years, so Zhang Qian suddenly mentioned it, and he didn't know where he was.

Everyone thought that it was the first time I knew Zhang Qian when I stood under the stage and listened to Zhang Qian sing at the freshman welcome party.They asked me why I like Zhang Qian, and I also said that it was because I looked up that day, and fell in love with one glance.

Actually yes, but also no.

It’s just that some things poke at my deepest and most embarrassing past, so I don’t want to mention it. Every time they ask, I pick up a similar reason and say that at first it was to prevaricate them, but later because of half-truths and half-false, I really overshadowed it. False, even I believe it myself.

In fact, subconsciously, I don't want to think about those things.

My parents died in a car accident the day before my college entrance examination.

We had agreed to make a "College Entrance Examination Smooth Soup" for me tonight, which is actually my favorite seaweed and egg drop soup. My mother gave it such a strange name to encourage me.

I don't know if it has any effect.

Because I didn't drink it.

In the afternoon, I was called out by the teacher when I was in the middle of class. It was my aunt who came to pick me up from my school. The teacher was not willing.

"Can't it be two days later? Tomorrow is the college entrance examination..."

"It can't be helped. He is a full-time student. He will know sooner or later that his parents are not here..."

At that time, I didn't understand what they were talking about. I was still thinking about the physics problem of the ball passing through the magnetic field just now. When the ball was about to pass through the magnetic field, it hit the wall hard and fell back to the ground. .

The magnetic field disappears, but the ball has nowhere to go, and even loses its target.

My aunt has no relationship with my mother, but she is not greedy for my family's money. She helped me deal with a lot of things quickly. When I realized that my parents were dead, they had already been burned to ashes.

It wasn't so fast at first, but then my aunt said, the child has the college entrance examination tomorrow, let's finish it early and let the child take the test.

I went to the examination room with my eyes open all night, and when I came out of the examination room after the last exam, all the candidates around me ran to my parents, and I was the only one standing at the school gate.

Like the last physics problem I did before the exam.

My stomach growled, and I realized that I hadn't eaten all day.

I don't have parents anymore.

I wanted to cry but I couldn’t cry. A rambunctious relative who wanted money wanted to come to me after being scolded by my aunt. I handed him the card that contained all my parents’ inheritance and said to him:

"If I give you all the money, can you give me back my parents?"

Maybe it was because my expression was too serious and scary that night, like some kind of ghost, so that there was a flash of lightning, and he ran away like a shit.

But I'm sad.

Not even money can tempt a money-loving liar to lie to me.

That means that there is really no hope for that matter.

I dragged my days until the announcement of the results of the college entrance examination. I took it for granted that my test was average, but it was not that bad.The students were chatting enthusiastically about which school to apply to. I looked at the wish list and didn't write for a long time.

The teacher was worried that I would miss the time and kept urging me.

There are many schools that I could go to, but I don't want to go to any of them.

Like me, there are several who did not fill in their volunteers, but they are entangled in which one to go, which is not the same as me.The teacher gathered us together, found a few of his previous students, and took us to visit universities including ours and several nearby cities.

I tried my best to perfuse them, but I was still very tired, so when I went to a certain university, I went back to the hotel with the excuse of feeling uncomfortable and left the big team.

I originally wanted to go back directly, but I went astray and ran to a strange place.

It was exam week at the university, and the summer vacation was coming after the exams, so the student union wanted to hold a small party.

They set up a shed in the open area of ​​the school to make a kitchen, with all kinds of kitchen utensils in it, but because many of them were taking exams, there was only one person here at that time.

That was the first time I met Zhang Qian.

He was tinkering with those kitchen utensils, and he saw me coming out of the corner of his eye. He mistook me for a member of the student union, and said, "Is it from the student union? Can you help me get the spoon over there?"

I actually just wanted to ask for directions, but he had a good attitude, and he helped me if I could help with a little effort. I gave him the spoon, but because I didn't have time to deny it, he automatically classified me as a member of the student union while he was busy. So he stuffed a small white porcelain bowl into my hand and said, "My tongue is numb, help me taste the saltiness."

I was going to refuse, but that bowl of soup was "Successful Soup for College Entrance Examination".

The bowl of soup I didn't get that night.

I shook my hands and brought the bowl to my mouth. I only took a sip, and the tears couldn't stop falling down.

I am obviously drinking soup, but there is more soup in the bowl.

Zhang Qian was taken aback, and hurriedly asked me what was wrong, but I shook my head and was speechless.

He froze for a moment, then took a pack of tissues from his pocket and handed it to me.

I still remember that there was a little bear printed on the package of that pack of tissues.

I couldn't stand crying, Zhang Qian hurriedly took a stool and asked me to sit down, and then worriedly asked the classmate what's wrong with you.This feeling of being taken care of made me think of the past. When I was a child, I loved to pile up building blocks, and I forgot to do other things when I piled them up. But standing and stacking was too tiring, and my dad would take a stool behind me between reading newspapers.

At that time, I didn't know Zhang Qian, and I didn't even know his name, but this soup gave me an inexplicable sense of security.

"Zhang Qian!" Someone called him in the room, but he didn't seem to be looking this way, so he didn't notice my existence, "Will you go to the Second Teaching later?"

Zhang Qian stepped up and wanted to leave, but I grabbed his arm.

That was the first time I pulled him, and one of the few times over the years.

It was the only one that succeeded.

My sudden selfishness made me reluctant to let go of this moment of familiarity, so that I spoke nonsense for a while and cried to him:

"Can you not go? Please, just stay with me for a while, just for a while..."

I held Zhang Qian's arm with one hand, and held the bowl of seaweed egg drop soup with the other. Zhang Qian didn't leave without spilling the soup.

He moved a stool and sat beside me, silently giving me, a stranger, a little quiet tenderness.

I didn't like him at that time, and he didn't remember me later. I applied to this university after I went back, and I was just grateful for the long-lost familiarity at that moment.

After crying completely, I seemed to think about it a lot. I didn't feel sad anymore, and I was able to pick up my life again.

Some people will never come back, but some people will live on.

I tidied myself up and went to school again. During the summer vacation, I learned a little about financial management. Some were saved, and some were clumsily invested.

There are losses and gains, but fortunately, there are degrees, and the life is not bad.

Everything seemed to be back to its best until I met Zhang Qian again.

At the welcome party, he sang "Red Beans" on stage.

I recognized him.

The rough lights shone on him, but he looked like the most exquisite divine residence in my eyes.

Like my parents watching in the sky, sprinkled starlight on him.

I recognized the tenderness of the moment I craved.

Zhang Qian only gave me this moment, but since then, I have been addicted to it for many years.

-

I was sitting in the driver's seat, Zhang Qian's pale hand was still on the window.

His arm protruded a little from the cuff, and a red mark was clearly visible inside.

It looked like a bruise, but I didn't care.

My silence made the two of them uneasy, Zhang Qian was worried about my answer, Wei Hongxin was worried about whether I would waver.

He is very smart, even if he doesn't know what happened, he can probably see the sadness that I can't hide in my expression.

Zhang Qian didn't know about it at first, but later when I was drunk, I dragged him to beg him to accompany me, and said a lot of nonsense, he remembered it and knew the reason.

Like that time, I mustered up the courage to beg him not to go.

After falling in love with him, I only asked for this once.

But he would rather leave his tenderness to strangers than to Geng Jiayou.

Just because Wu Chunxian said: "Zhang Qian, I want you."

He went.

No matter that day I just got burnt on my arm because of him.

"Zhang Qian." I lowered the car window a little, and Wei Hongxin held my hand tightly.

"Actually, I never hated you." I said, "Because I know that I have brought all the blame on myself. You never said that you liked me. It was I who insisted on following you and waited for you to respond to me."

Zhang Qian wanted to say something, but was interrupted by me: "Do you know why I gave you 20 yuan during the divorce?"

Zhang Qian is silent now.

Probably he didn't know how to say it himself.

He doesn't know if it's because I love him or because I pity him.

"Actually, I still hope that you will live a good life." I looked at him and said, "Maybe this idea is ridiculous and naive, but I really didn't think about what I want to do to you. Because I don't hate, I don't think about revenge. , I even feel that as the person who has been with you for so long, I should leave you something, especially when you are still pregnant and have no source of income."

"Zhang Qian, I never thought that you would have a bad life, it's true."

I saw Zhang Qian's eyes light up, but unfortunately, it wasn't what he thought.

"So compare your heart to your heart, and I hope you will make me feel better."

Zhang Qian opened his mouth slightly, as if he understood what I was saying, but he didn't seem to understand.

But it doesn't matter, I will make it clear to him.

"I have a lover, and I have decided to marry him, and we will be together for the rest of my life. My next life plan has nothing to do with you, and I hope you don't want to, and expect more from me."

"I don't hate you, but I don't love you either."

Our lives intersect, that's all.

"I won't invite you to my wedding, what will happen to you in the future, please don't come to me again."

I forcefully took Zhang Qian's hand on the car window, raised the car window, and stepped on the accelerator.

I held the steering wheel with one hand, and interlocked the fingers of Wei Hongxin with the other hand.

All the love and sustenance of youth will eventually be exhausted in waste again and again.

I'm not a moth, so there's no need to keep fighting fires.