self-deprecating

Gu Lan woke up once in the middle of the night, and she couldn't help crying when she saw Gu Ze beside the bed.

Drop by drop of tears flowed down the corners of the eyes onto the pillow, leaving dizzy water marks.

Gu Ze raised his hand to stroke the tears in the corners of her eyes, and said with a smile, "Don't cry, don't cry, why are you still crying? It's not beautiful to cry."

When Gu Lan heard his words, she cried even more sadly.

Gu Ze wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes, and gently held her hand, "It's okay, isn't it all right? Take good care of your illness, you'll be fine, everything will be fine."

Gu Lan also wanted to comfort him, and pulled the corners of her mouth, revealing a shallow, almost invisible smile.Then close your eyes, trying not to let the tears flow out.In the end, it seemed to be tired, and fell asleep again.

Gu Ze fetched a basin of hot water, wet a towel and gently wiped Gu Lan's face, wiping away the tears on his face.Then sit by the hospital bed and look out the window.

Han Zizhou: Rest early.

The screen of Gu Ze's cell phone lit up for a moment, and it was particularly eye-catching in the dark night.

It was Han Zizhou's news.

Gu Ze moved his fingers and replied: You should also go to bed earlier.

Han Zizhou: Good night.

Gu Ze: Good night.

For a moment, Gu Ze suddenly wanted to tell Han Zizhou, his worries, his panic, he wanted Han Zizhou to hug him, and tell him that it was okay.

But counting the time, Han Zizhou was already in the capital, and it was the last moment before the exam, so he couldn't be distracted in the slightest.

Gu Ze clicked on the WeChat chat history, and looked at the message from Han Zizhou, it seemed that Han Zizhou said "good night" to him himself, so Han Zizhou was with him.

It wasn't until the sky outside the window showed a kind of gray that Gu Ze realized that it was almost dawn.

There were all kinds of footsteps in the corridor, the sound of pulleys across the ground, busy and noisy.

The hospital is a place where salvation and death, hope and farewell are staged. Too many tears stay in this place, and you will find that life is always small and fragile.

"Di-di-" The detection machine rang all night, weak and at a fixed frequency, like a heartbeat, constantly beating.

Gu Ze washed his face with cold water, and felt it with his hand on his left chest.Still dancing, calm and powerful, that's enough.

The nurse entered the ward and wanted to push Gu Lan to continue to do some examinations.Gu Ze ran before and after, paid the fee, took the examination report, and went to the doctor.

□□ came in the afternoon, Gu Lan had just eaten and rested, and the two sat on the seats outside the ward.

"Don't worry too much. You're recovering well after the operation and it won't affect your daily life. You stay with me in the hospital these days. Don't worry about anything else. Take care of your mother and yourself. If you collapse, who can How about taking care of her?"

"I see, □□."

□□Looking at Gu Ze's not-so-good-looking face, "Did you rest last night?"

"No, I just finished the operation, and I can't sleep at all. I can feel relieved just looking at her." Gu Ze smiled, but the smile didn't reach his eyes, like a programmed robot, with the corners of his mouth curled up. Fixed arc.

□□Silent for a long time, did not speak.

Before leaving, he said that he wanted to go in and have a look at Gu Lan.

Gu Lan was still asleep, so she left without stopping to disturb her.

□□After leaving, Gu Ze discovered that there was an extra plastic bag beside Gu Lan's bed.Puzzled, he opened it and found that it was two stacks of cash.

Gu Ze looked at the money and realized that it was left behind by the police.An ordinary high school math teacher, with the most ordinary salary, only exchanged two down jackets, how could he be so active in giving him money.

Gu Ze put away the money and didn't move it.

In the evening, Lei Ge rushed over in a hurry.

As soon as he saw Gu Ze, he said angrily, "What's the matter with you? Why don't you tell me about such a big thing? If I didn't pass by your house to have a look and found no one at home, did you never plan to Tell me? You have to ask me to call you before you speak?!"

Gu Ze knew Lei Ge's kindness, so he could only keep smiling, "Lei Ge, calm down, I didn't mean not to tell you, it's not too late."

"What's too late? You can't spare just one phone call?" Lei Ge glanced at him, "You just don't want to tell me!"

After finishing speaking, Lei Ge sighed, "I know you don't want to owe anyone, but this kind of thing is unusual. I'll help you, and you can just find a chance to pay me back in the future. Why should the distinction be so clear? Do you have any friends?"

Gu Ze smiled, "Well, thank you Brother Lei."

After teaching Gu Ze a lesson, Brother Lei entered the ward. Gu Lan was lying on the bed, her face was pale, but she still had some energy.

"Xiao Lei, I have caused you trouble."

"Sister-in-law, don't say such things. You have taken care of me before. I should help you now. You should take good care of your health. I still want to eat the pancakes you baked." Brother Lei sat down Beside the hospital bed, he said with a smile.

After chatting with Gu Lan for a while, Gu Lan was about to rest.

Lei Ge pulled Gu Ze aside, "I will guard tonight, you can rest for a while."

"No need." Gu Ze directly refused.

"Look at what you look like now!" Lei Ge pointed to his face, "It's so ugly."

"Brother Lei, you still have something to do in the store."

"You don't care about me, you can't take care of the things in my shop even if I close the door." Lei Ge knocked on his forehead.

Gu Ze didn't feel any pain.

Gu Ze still stayed by the bed, not intending to leave at all.

Lei Ge had no choice but Gu Ze was so stubborn and strong that even ten cows could not be pulled back.I had no choice but to prepare food and blankets for Gu Ze.

"It's December, sitting here at night won't freeze you to death."

Covering Lei Ge's blanket, Gu Ze waved his hand at him, "Go back quickly, the hospital only allows one person to accompany the bed at night."

Lei Ge glared at him angrily, "I'll come over tomorrow morning."

The blanket was very soft, Gu Ze could not fall asleep leaning on the chair, he only occasionally closed his eyes and then opened them again, looking at the dark ward.

Gu Ze thought it was a bit fun, he was always sleepy at school, even in class he couldn't stop himself from being sleepy, and he fell asleep as soon as he touched the pillow when he returned to the dormitory.

Now he can't sleep.

The temple seems to be throbbing and hurting, I don't know if it is because of insomnia.But with his eyes closed, he didn't feel sleepy.

Gu Lan's medicine contained calming ingredients, so she slept soundly at the moment.The wound always hurt so much that she couldn't rest well, and now she can finally rest.

But Gu Lan still frowned slightly.

When waking up during the day, Gu Lan was very calm, showing no discomfort at all, and only after falling asleep at night did she show pain and sadness.

With his eyes closed, he didn't know how many sheep he had counted, because Gu Ze always counted wrong.When I opened my eyes again, it was another morning.

The winter sun always climbs up very late, and the gray and gloomy sky is a bit depressing.

Lei Ge arrived very early and brought it with him early.

"It's really cold this morning, it feels like it's going to rain, hurry up and eat something." He said and handed the food to Gu Ze.

Gu Ze took the breakfast, "Thank you, Brother Lei."

"I brought white porridge for my sister-in-law, it should be drinkable."

"Ah."

In the few days after the operation, I was most worried about any problems, and there were a lot of routine checkups every day. Gu Ze followed behind busy, but the time passed quickly.

Before going to bed at night, Han Zizhou sent a WeChat message.

Gu Ze still drove Lei Ge back, and stayed alone in the hospital.

Han Zizhou: I have an exam tomorrow, and I'm a little nervous.

Gu Ze: Don't be nervous, I trust you.

Han Zizhou: Can I call you?

Gu Ze looked at the WeChat message, turned around and left the ward, and stood at the door of the ward.

Gu Ze: Yes.

Han Zizhou called in the next second.

"Gu Ze."

"Yeah." Gu Ze adjusted his breathing, "It's so late, why don't you rest?"

"I want to hear your voice, but it's been a long time since I heard it." Han Zizhou seemed to chuckle slightly, and his voice traveled along the phone to Gu Ze's ears.

"Well. Don't be nervous about the exam. You are very good. I'm waiting for you to come back with a gold medal."

"It takes two days to take the exam, and I can see you in four days. How is your study going?"

Gu Ze hoarsely said, "It's pretty good, but there are a lot of quizzes, and there are a lot of papers every week, but you must be busier."

Han Zizhou: "It's okay, but yesterday the professor from the Department of Physics of P University came to give us a lecture. He is really amazing."

Han Zizhou's voice sounded very excited, full of joy and yearning, Gu Ze seemed to feel better when he heard his voice.

"That's really good." Gu Ze said, "Go to bed early, there is an exam tomorrow."

"OK, good night."

"Good night."

Gu Ze hung up the phone, and the empty corridor returned to calm.

It is often said that happiness is to be shared and the person you share it with will be happy too.Pain also needs to be shared, so your pain will be reduced because someone shares it.

Holding the phone, Gu Ze seemed to feel the nervous and excited mood conveyed by Han Zizhou.

There was joy in his voice when he talked about the game, and there should be a bright, twinkle in his eyes.

He is naturally suitable and has been working hard. Gu Ze knows that he will do well in the exam.

Come back with his pride and joy.

Gu Ze entered the ward, the quiet ward only had the sound of machines.

Actually everything is fine.

Gu Lan lay there, and the sound of her steady heartbeat was displayed on the screen next to her.

The two people he cares about the most are good, that's enough.

He nestled in a chair, covered with a blanket, and sat quietly.

He remembered his past life.

When I was in sixth grade, my father passed away.He was a truck driver at the time, but an accident happened due to fatigue driving, and all the cargo on the truck was destroyed.

The goods are from the factory run by Li Jin and his family.At that time, Gu Lan finished her father's funeral affairs very strongly, and promised that Li Jin's family would pay for the goods.

At that time, Gu Ze felt that Gu Lan was a particularly strong mother.He is dependent and attached, even if he lacks his father's care and teaching, Gu Lan has made him grow up very well.

At that time Li Jin was a junior high school student, while he was a primary school student.He was often chased, beaten, and bruised.Later he grew up, and when Li Jin came to look for him again, he called back.

Gu Lan didn't criticize him, but silently helped him deal with the wound, and then sighed softly.

In the past, Gu Ze didn't understand why Gu Lan sighed. He always thought that Gu Lan sighed because he was fighting.

Until one time, he saw Gu Lan crying at his father's photo and asked him, "Am I unable to protect my son? If he had a father, he wouldn't be bullied, right?"

"I don't blame you for leaving us mother and son, I just think I didn't take good care of my son. I miss you a little..."

Only then did Gu Ze realize that Gu Lan was only blaming himself for not protecting him well.

Later, when he was injured, he was always afraid to go home.Afraid that Gu Lan would feel sad seeing his injury.

Gu Lan worked very hard, but suddenly found out that she had a bad heart two years ago.He asked Gu Lan to pay more attention to rest, and then went to the Internet cafe to practice and learn skills from Lei Ge. He just wanted to help Gu Lan share some of the burden.

The doctor said that although this was an acute myocardial infarction, there was a warning before.

He was a little annoyed, he couldn't go home from school once a week, so naturally he didn't find anything wrong with Gu Lan.Gu Lan has always been a person who reports good news but not bad news, so these accidents happened unexpectedly.

But Gu Lan is still fine now, that's enough.

The author has something to say: Thank you everyone.