you are the one I love.

On the balcony, Gu Siyan leaned on the balcony, looked up at the dark sky, and didn't know what she was thinking.

On the side table, there was a cup of coffee, steaming.

After Cheng Xueyan took a shower, she saw that there was no one in the room, and when she came to the living room, she saw Gu Siyan like this.

There was only one back, but it made her feel lonely.

"What's wrong?" Cheng Xueyan stood quietly and looked at Gu Siyan for a while, then walked behind her, reached out to hug her, and put her head on her back, "Isn't the matter... all settled?"

It was because of Cheng Xueyan's approach that Gu Siyan came back to her senses a little, she smiled, and looked back at Cheng Xueyan, "It's just... just remembering what Grandpa said to me not long ago."

"What did grandpa tell you?" Cheng Xueyan still maintained the posture of holding Gu Siyan, but raised her head, looked at Gu Siyan and asked.

"He said..." After a pause for a second, Gu Siyan seemed to sigh, then turned her head and continued to look at the dark sky, and said in a daze, "Grandpa said... he is sorry, he will pass Everything about my parents was blamed on me. He said...it wasn't my fault."

"What about you, what do you think about what grandpa said?" Cheng Xueyan couldn't help asking, seeing Gu Siyan's ecstasy.

"Me?" Gu Siyan smiled, she didn't know how to answer, she thought for a while before saying, "I don't know either." She shook her head.

"Ever since my parents passed away, I felt that the cause of all things and all the mistakes were on me. Until now, I still think so. But not long ago, my grandfather told me that those It's not my fault... If I think about it, maybe for a moment, I should feel a sense of relief, but..." Gu Siyan was recalling, "It's not as deep as I imagined."

Cheng Xueyan let go of Gu Siyan's hand, and instead of holding her, she walked to her side and looked at her, "You're just used to it. You're used to carrying so much, you're used to blaming yourself, you're used to it." Blame all the blame for what happened back then on yourself." She held Gu Siyan's shoulders and made her look into her eyes.

"Habit?" Gu Siyan repeated these two words, with a weak face, "Maybe. Maybe... I just got used to it. Because... I always think about it countless times, even if I know the truth now Even if my parents' death was just an accident back then, I would still think that way, thinking about it countless times. If... I wasn't so self-willed back then, it would be fine. Then my parents wouldn't have passed away. Nian Xi I won't lose my parents, and my grandpa won't lose—"

"—Siyan." Cheng Xueyan interrupted Gu Siyan's series of words like this, she didn't want Gu Siyan to sink more and more into that kind of guilt pain.

"I think so too."

Gu Siyan looked at Cheng Xueyan.

"I will too, think of the past countless times, make assumptions countless times, and think about all possible what-ifs." If you think so, then it is the same for Cheng Xueyan.

"Although we continue to be together now. But I will also think of the past, and I will also think of the year. If you hadn't left, then what would we be like now? We have always been together, Or maybe they have already broken up halfway?" For Cheng Xueyan, she also had countless assumptions, countless ifs, but she knew that there were never ifs.

"What do you think?"

"..." Gu Siyan was completely stunned, she hadn't thought about this question, she just...

"Look. You hesitated too." She thought, even if it took a hundred ways to get Gu Siyan out of the shadow of the past, then she, Cheng Xueyan, would do the same, "So these things, there are no ifs at all. , your assumptions can't determine what the outcome will be."

"...I..." Gu Siyan lowered her head gradually, "You are right."

There is really nothing to do with her, facing Gu Siyan's pitiful look with her head bowed, Cheng Xueyan actually finds it extremely cute!Please, it's rare to see her like this.So Cheng Xueyan held her face up and asked her to look at herself again, "Grandpa didn't say that to comfort you, he was just telling you the truth. Because the truth is that the death of your uncle and aunt had nothing to do with you. You don't want to The responsibility is gone. Do you want to leave me again because of this matter? "

"No! I didn't! I didn't mean that... and I definitely didn't think about it that way, I was—" Gu Siyan understood when she heard Cheng Xueyan say this, and her own depression also made her feel uneasy, so she tried her best to deny it and explain Before he finished speaking, Cheng Xueyan interrupted him.

Cheng Xueyan stretched out her hand, put her index finger against Gu Siyan's lips, and signaled her not to continue, "Then don't keep blaming yourself like this, okay?"

Gu Siyan opened her mouth, she didn't want to deceive Cheng Xueyan, so after she really made up her mind, she answered Cheng Xueyan softly, "Okay. I promise you. Never again."

"Yeah." Cheng Xueyan smiled and hugged her again.

Gu Siyan also hugged her into his arms.

Cheng Xueyan's muffled voice came from Gu Siyan's neck, "It's late, let's go to bed, okay?"

"..." Gu Siyan looked at the time, it was nine o'clock.

nine o'clock...

In fact, it is not too late.

but……

Well, Gu Siyan just thought Cheng Xueyan was telling herself that she wanted to go to bed with her, um, that's right, it was the one that Gu Siyan wanted to go to bed with. .

The so-called - go to bed - sleep.

Naturally, go to bed first, then sleep.

She naturally said, "Okay."

So, Gu Siyan let go of Cheng Xueyan, and followed her back to the bedroom.

however……

As soon as Gu Siyan walked into the bedroom door, she caught a pillow when she met her face.Looking at the pillow in her hand, Gu Siyan looked at Cheng Xueyan with some confusion, "Didn't you say sleep?"

"Yeah. I want to sleep, but..." Sleep, why sleep, "Go out and sleep."

"Get out, get out? Get out?! Why?" My god, is that what she understood?go out to sleep?Didn't they say-go to bed-sleep-sleep?

"Yes. Go out to sleep." Cheng Xueyan nodded, then slowly walked towards Gu Siyan, standing in front of her, Cheng Xueyan pushed Gu Siyan away, and closed the bedroom door with a "snap".

Gu Siyan was stunned outside the door.

My god, what's the matter?

Awkward?

"In view of your performance today, I am very dissatisfied. So you sleep outside today." Cheng Xueyan's voice came through the door muffled.

"Outside?! Where do you want me to sleep outside? Where is there a place for me to sleep?" Gu Siyan protested very dissatisfied.

"The living room, and the guest room. You can just choose one." Cheng Xueyan replied.

"..." Gu Siyan pursed her lips, speechless.

Gu Siyan scratched her cheek, and after thinking for a while, she said to Cheng Xueyan who was sulking with a pillow in the door, "Then... well. You go to bed early, good night." Then she herself sat on the sofa with her pillow in her arms The reason why I chose to sleep on the sofa is because if Cheng Xueyan woke up in the middle of the night and saw her so pitiful in the living room, maybe he would let her go back to the bedroom?

However, fortunately, when I bought the furniture, the sofa was big enough. I bought the big sofa because I thought that I might be able to lean on the sofa with Cheng Xueyan in the future, but I didn't expect that now this big sofa became her second one. A place to sleep.

Cheng Xueyan, who was inside the door, was sitting on the bed and hugging the pillow.

She's not really angry...well, she's a little angry because...she really doesn't want to see Gu Siyan, who has been immersed in the past in pain.She wants... to start again with Gu Siyan, because after resolving the past and all the barriers between her and Gu Siyan, Cheng Xueyan and Gu Siyan can really, well, start again.

Regarding this matter, Gu Siyan had promised her early on, but today... she showed such a pained and self-blame expression again.Cheng Xueyan felt very uncomfortable and sad.So, let's consider it a small punishment for Gu Siyan today.

"Ring, ring, ring." The phone on the bedside table rang suddenly.

Cheng Xueyan reached for the phone and saw that it was a text message from Gu Siyan: Good night.

Good night……

good night.

Good night what the hell!

Alas, Cheng Xueyan lay flat on the bed, looking at the empty place beside her, Gu Siyan even sent her good night, what good night, she doesn't know if she will be able to fall asleep tonight.

Gu Siyan has been away for so many years, hasn't she lived alone?Why is it just that she left him for one night now, and he will not be able to sleep all night?

Cheng Xueyan stared at the empty place beside her in a daze, thinking so in her heart, she didn't know...whether this was punishing Gu Siyan, or punishing herself.

Gu Siyan in the living room, why not.

She thought that Cheng Xueyan would calm down the next day, and this matter... probably should be turned over, but when she woke up, she and Xueyan had breakfast together, and went to the parking lot to pick up the car together , Cheng Xueyan threw herself down in front of her and their two younger sisters.

That's not right, to be precise, Cheng Xueyan got into Gu Nianxi's car directly, leaving Gu Siyan with a confused face, and Gu Nianxi and Cheng Yufei who cast sympathetic looks.

Cheng Xueyan, who was sitting in the back seat of the car, did it on purpose, okay?

In fact, all her anger disappeared last night.I couldn't resist going out of the bedroom to see Gu Siyan who was sleeping in the living room.

In the end, she actually let her see Gu Siyan sound asleep!The point is!Gu Siyan actually fell asleep!She can sleep? !

She herself didn't fall asleep all night because Gu Siyan didn't sleep beside her!

At that moment, Cheng Xueyan wanted to get angry.

But... when she saw Gu Siyan sleeping with folded hands holding a book... which seemed to be a photo album or something, out of curiosity and Gu Siyan's incorrect sleeping position, Cheng Xueyan lightly held Gu Siyan's hands The things were taken out.

It is a memorial book.

It's her...and Gu Siyan's memorial book.

The album is full of photos of Cheng Xueyan and Gu Siyan in the past, and the last one is the most recent photos, because they just got together again recently.There are a few photos in the middle of the album, which are photos of Cheng Xueyan when she graduated from high school and university.

Obviously... During that period of time, Gu Siyan would not have taken these photos.Cheng Xueyan thought of what Mr. Gu told her on the day when Gu announced the news of the death of Gu Siyan's parents.

Gu Siyan has been... watching her.

Thinking of this, Cheng Xueyan couldn't be angry, all she could do was feel distressed.

She leaned forward and planted a kiss on her lips.

Since Gu Siyan has done so much for her, then she... also wants to do something for Gu Siyan.After this idea came up, an idea came to Cheng Xueyan's mind.

She secretly laughed, then silently said three words in Gu Siyan's ear, then went back to the room and closed her eyes to sleep satisfied.