Hotaru [The Tale of Genji]

With Ying's heart of admiration for Suzaku, seeing her sweetheart betray their relationship due to this helpless reason, I am afraid that her heart will break.Although he never showed this emotion on his face from time to time, he was also depressed.If you meet those eyes at this time, the affection in the past will become painful because of the loss.Even if he tightened his heart and clothes, he couldn't dare to let go of the suffocating sadness.

There is nowhere to resolve these emotions, and they accumulate more and more with the rotation of day and night.At this time, the person who was always noble and pure was like a trapped beast, wandering around in a daze.

The others didn't know the truth, they just thought it was because the handsome palace fell in love with a certain girl, but the people in the palace fell in love with her after asking for nothing.If this kind of brotherly hatred is placed in gossip and gossip, it may be the favorite of the curious crowd.

But if it happened to the two most honorable people in the dynasty, they would just stop talking, kneel down, and dare not speak.

However, the maid of Chengxiang Palace knows the inside story best, so she doesn't know that this matter is not so simple.It is precisely because Yingying and Suzaku have walked harder than others, and now they are in such a situation, they are really distressed to the point of death.

However, this person has reached such a point, and he is just showing a little sadness and exhaustion in front of people close to him.This kind of stubborn support is even more sad than crying.Cheng Xiangdian was annoyed at why he brought up the child's sadness just now, and under self-blame, he wanted to be the same as before, holding his son in his arms and softly comforting him.

But such an action now is a big disrespect and inappropriate.And with the pride of being handsome, he would never make such a weak gesture.That kind of presumptuous wailing was more like a humiliation to him.

Seeing her mother's beautiful eyes stained with autumn frost, Ying twitched the corners of her mouth, and said softly: "Mother, you don't have to worry about your son...I just feel a little tired."

The kind of helplessness and exhaustion that are too far away from hope and can never be encountered.

He tried his best, just because he was the only one beside Suzaku.Seeing that there is finally a response, but falling from the clouds, Yaochi's dream is only a moment away - it is so hard to get, but so easy to lose.

What is painful is often not the loss, but the process of waiting for the loss.The current Shuai Gong is going through this process, watching his lover gradually move away, but he has no clue.

However, he didn't want to show any more dissatisfaction.It's just because Suzaku has worked so hard, and he has burdened so many things, he shouldn't bear the dissatisfaction from Yinggong because it wasn't his fault.

If that person who is as gentle as jade and as beautiful as a lotus shows a little sadness, even a slight frown will make Shuai Gong feel extremely distressed.But now, both of them have fallen into a situation where they can't get what they want and can't do anything.Even if Ying wanted to step forward and hug Suzaku into her arms, it would only become more and more difficult in the future.

He couldn't bear to make Suzaku suffer, so he bit his lip and endured it.

As for, when can't bear it anymore?Shuai Gong, he really doesn't know.

"There is no major event in the previous court. I will ask for leave and rest in the mansion for a few nights. I will also ask my mother to take in my son."

"This is your home, why accept such words, are you making fun of me?"

"My son doesn't dare."

"Seeing that you are not in good spirits, you should take a good rest," Cheng Xiangdian sighed, "Stay here, and go back when you are ready to face it."

·

As Shuai Gong said, there is no major event in the court recently.Perhaps it was because His Majesty's resignation agreed to hold a banquet, which eased the aggressive momentum of those aristocratic families.They all retracted their bodies that were about to stand up and roar in satisfaction, and sat on the loose mattresses, discussing how to let their daughters or sisters win the empress dowager's favor.

Hotaru's leave made Suzaku a little sad and a little happy.Now he doesn't know how to face Firefly.He didn't want to say that he had the willingness to compromise, as if he could pretend that nothing happened.The actions that can be made clearly express this meaning.

Hotaru, who understood Suzaku, chose to avoid it, and told him honestly: I don't agree, but I won't stop it.In other words, I don't know how to stop it and put my sad heart away from right and wrong.

The current imperial palace is bustling with activity, and everyone is happily preparing for the palace banquet that will follow.This banquet was the largest entertainment since Suzaku came to the throne, and gathered all the nobles and ministers in the imperial capital.Many small households who were not qualified to step on the Pole Hall actually received the invitation.

The Empress Dowager of the Honghui Palace tried her best to show her authority this time. As long as the scenery is boundless, she will not hesitate to pay other prices for luxury and prosperity.

The palace servants walked around holding the utensils and fabrics, exchanging greetings and laughing, which was as beautiful as a picture.But His Majesty didn't care to appreciate it, and turned around and left Qingliang Hall.He only thought about the last time, when he and Ying were admiring the plum blossoms in the Plum Pot Hall, they were still in harmony with each other.At this time, it is better to go there for a walk, and the mood will be better.

With this expectation in mind, I hurried to the place, only to see that the plum blossoms have withered and the green leaves have bloomed.Such a vigorous appearance can't bring out the slightest pleasure.His Majesty was greatly disappointed, and returned to Qingliang Hall in a daze.

Along the way, I saw a newly dressed palace attendant saluting and saying hello.No matter how beautiful the color is, Suzaku can't arouse the slightest interest in admiring it.It was the smiles on their faces that made him sadder.

Back in the bedroom, His Majesty asked everyone to retreat and not to make noise around.It was rare for the always gentle Lord to lose his temper, and his face was full of impatience.The attendants were startled, and they all retreated with them.He also patrolled the vicinity strictly so as not to disturb His Majesty by calling some ignorant people.

Telling everyone to back down was not enough, Suzaku, who was bored, put down all the bamboo curtains by himself.Blocking all the bright light of the spring day, the room became dim and dark, which calmed him down a little.

At this time, Suzaku didn't care about his appearance, but he casually went to the ground, and began to miss Shuai Gong.Just thinking about it made him feel pain, and read it to the marrow of his bone.He still remembers the gloomy expression on Yingying's farewell, and the gesture behind him that he wanted to keep.

He couldn't imagine the two of them getting along as cold as strangers in the future.The child said to himself so swearingly that he should stand by his side.But now, he has failed him.

The world's profits come and go, for the long-term continuation of the family's interests.The family of the right minister and other aristocratic families put pressure on His Majesty to marry a woman from the aristocratic family.Because of the coincidence of interests, the normally tense families join hands, forcing Suzaku so that Suzaku has no strength to breathe.

Seeing the former dynasty falling apart, there is no way to resist like this.When the lady of the Honghui Palace saw His Majesty in person, it was not too much to say that she was intimidating, so she asked Suzaku to compromise and take a step back, willing to let the daughter of a nobleman into the palace.

The responsibility of being the master made Suzaku make such a move, but as a lover, he naturally failed to live up to his sincerity.However, Yinggong did not fight with him.Because he is too aware of Suzaku's responsibilities and pressures as the owner.He didn't say a word, only showing a little bit of heartache when no one was around.It's just that the emotion was too sad and hopeless, how could Suzaku not find out?

Suzaku admits her grievances, admits her hatred,

But he couldn't recognize Shuai Gong's forced smile for himself.

He hated himself for compromising, and lamented his own powerlessness.The indifferent and condescending expression of the maid of the Honghui Palace came to the fore, and the past that had been strangled and forced reappeared again.He was clearly close relatives by blood, yet he joined courtiers to put pressure on him.But the person who has been firmly with him has been heartbroken by him.

Now he misses him like crazy, wishing he could go to see Shuai Gong right away.But how did he see it, where did he see it, and how dare he see it?His life was full of gloom, and Shuai Gong once wished him to be as high as the sky and as wide as the sea, like a blue bird spreading its wings far into the sky.But now he is bound by shackles, and he only dares to face his heartache in the darkness.Or in other words, from the moment he was born, he couldn't fly away.

Suzaku bit her lower lip to prevent herself from crying sadly.He covered his eyes with his arm, as if covering his sight, and also covering the source of his sadness...

...but the tears couldn't stop.

·

His Majesty Shuai lived in Santiaoyuan for three or four consecutive days, and he was groggy every day, with an absent-minded and listless look.He took leave for a long time, probably because he didn't even want to go to the cherry blossom viewing party.

Mrs. Bosheng's sister was taken to the courtyard of Chengxiang Hall the day before yesterday.In order to be more abrupt than the guests, Shuai Gong just said hello at the door every day, and then went back to his residence early, staying inside and not coming out.

Everyone in the Neixiang Mansion knew that His Majesty Shuai was in a bad mood, and even walked back and forth a lot more lightly.Compared with the excitement and agitation of the entire imperial capital, it almost turned the sky upside down, and the sanjoin was terribly quiet.

Fortunately, the imperial servants in the inner minister's mansion were very strict, and there were no gossips.At a time like this, no one would take the opportunity to ask for trouble.

Because I really can't get interested in doing other things. If I am free, I will be full of thoughts about one person.Ying Ying, who was hiding in the room, was depressed and irritable, so she simply played chess with herself.After a while, he fell into an unsolvable deadlock, just as he is now trapped in unsolvable emotions.

In an instant, Shuai's palace exploded, and all the jade chess pieces were overturned by him on the ground, making a series of crisp sounds.He clutched his chest, trying to calm down the irritability that surged up.

But as long as the heartstrings are pulled, the unspeakable boredom will show its own sense of existence everywhere.Lifting the chessboard was not enough, Shuai Gong picked up the Tang knife next to him and walked into the yard.

After hacking five or six times in a row without any rules, the depression in my heart was relieved a little with sweat.

The attendant knelt in the distance and reported with a trembling voice that Mr. Noyama Kohei was visiting.He was frightened by Shuai Gong's huge anger just now, he only felt that the Tang knife was soaked in a frightening cold murderous aura, and he didn't dare to take a step closer.

Hearing the news, His Majesty Shuai's expression remained stern.Pack up the knives before heading back.

Master Onoyama was already welcomed in by someone at this time, and was eating snacks.Seeing Shuai Gongxia come in with messy hair, he was startled.Just now I thought he had fought with someone, but then I thought about who else in this mansion would dare to yell in front of the commander-in-chief.Fortunately, Mr. Ping never saw the overturned chessboard, otherwise he would probably think of going to a more messy place.

"Why are you here..." Yingying put the knife away, and let down the messy hair.His long hair covered his gorgeous facial features, with a bit of a cold taste.

Mr. Xingping shuddered twice, "You forgot, I will ask you to report the news on this day every month."

"...Indeed," Shuai Gong was silent for a while before saying, "I actually forgot."

Xingping didn't care, or he didn't seem to see Shuai Gong's disappointed look.He only narrated the recent news one by one, and listed those suspicious points. He only said that he was still investigating and would reply in a few days.

Shuai Gong listened carefully and had a plan in mind.Although feeling lonely, it didn't interfere with such official duties, so he ordered some more things.Xingping picked up important notes, and the two discussed it, and there was nothing serious about it.

"By the way, I met Dong Gongxia in the palace."

"spring?"

"That's right," Xingping picked up a piece of snack and chewed slowly, "I thought he was waiting for me wholeheartedly, but unexpectedly it was for you."

"Swallow the thing down before talking," Shuai Gong frowned in disgust, seeing Mr. Xingping swallowed the thing cleanly, he continued to ask: "What did he ask you for?"

"It's nothing," Xingping said, looking at his cheeks, "Just ask me when you will return to the palace."

Yingying frowned even deeper, "How did you answer?"

"I said soon." Mr. Xingping spoke briskly, "That child is really worried about you. Before you leave, let me tell you not to quarrel with His Majesty, go back early, he misses you very much."

Ying's heart paused, with mixed feelings, and her mood was so complicated that she didn't know what to say for a while.

Xingping was still chattering beside him.After talking a lot, he suddenly stopped talking and looked at Shuai Gong suspiciously, "...Did you quarrel with His Majesty?"

"No." Shuai Gong squeezed the center of his brows, denying it flatly.

"Oh," Xingping responded, and said indifferently, "Whether it is or not, you two should make up quickly. Every time you are in a bad mood, it must be because of His Majesty."

Shuai Gong couldn't refute this sentence, his heart that was already blocked was getting more and more blocked now.But Mr. Xingping hit the nail on the head, so he couldn't deny anything.

"You talk too much..."

Xingping shrugged, saying that he was used to being said that and didn't care.

Shuai Gong wouldn't really say anything to him, suddenly he had a flash of inspiration, as if thinking of something, he said: "Let's start looking into what I told you last time."

Xingping's hand extended towards His Highness suddenly stopped, and the expression on his hippie smile disappeared, revealing a very serious expression.There was some disbelief hidden in his tone, but he was still calm, "Are you serious?"

Hotaru pushed back all the long hair on both sides, exposing her face to the daylight.The confusion between his brows has disappeared at this time, if not for exploring his bottomless thoughts, it would only make people think that he is still the unparalleled handsome palace servant.

"Well, seriously. I've been thinking about this for a long time."

And in the past few days, I probably have thought about it clearly.

The author has something to say: Both of them don't want to burden each other, but both are sad.However, Yingying has never been a person who just sits and waits to die.