Reborn and die without regret

I am a puppet, a puppet that cannot think.He was manipulated from birth, and the outcome was determined by others.

No matter what I did, I was monitored and manipulated by others, until I met someone, he made my life different, he made me miserable, but made me happier, I found that I was still alive, I found I am still alone.

My name is Fu Qingping, and I don't know who took my name, because I have no mother, only a father who is like a stranger.

I always thought that Fu Hongtao was my father, and I was full of admiration for him, but that was before I was six years old.He has always only had his younger brother in his eyes, and he never cared about me. When I was six years old, I quarreled with my younger brother, and I pushed him down. In the end, he suddenly appeared, looked at me indifferently, and said to me:

"You're old too, it's time to do something for me." Then I was thrown into a hellish training place by him. At that time, all the people around me were teenagers, and only I was a six-year-old child In that place, only the strong can survive, where people are often beaten to death for a steamed bun, because there is too little food, and only by grabbing can they be eaten.

How a six-year-old child survived is almost blurred to me, because at that time, I lived in a muddle every day. I only knew that I would have food tomorrow. I wanted to escape, but I was caught back. I beat him to death, but I was only spared once because of my superior aptitude.I begged them to let me see my father, but no one listened to me.In the end, I stopped begging them, but I still had hope in my heart. My father came back and took me away, but my father never showed up.

When I was 12 years old, I became one of the only few people alive there. I was taken away and came to my father, but my father said that if you still want to call him father, you have to be like a puppet. Let him control.

I thought I was mature enough, but found that I was still too immature, I still longed for my father's love, even though I was disappointed with him, I still wanted his love.

So I am willing to be his puppet, manipulated by him, and at his mercy.I thought I could be as happy as my younger brother in this way, but no, every time I was on the verge of life and death in order to complete his task, although he would praise me every time, his eyes were always so perfunctory.

They all call me Eldest Young Master, but their eyes are so pitiful, but I don't know what they are pitying.

Until one day, I finally knew what they were sympathizing with. It turned out that I was not Fu Hongtao's biological child at all, so I would never get his love. He said that I was his child, just to manipulate me.

Since I'm not his son, why does he ask me to do so much for him? Every time someone wants to kill my brother, he always pushes me out. Others don't know and think I'm his son, so every time I will become a target, his eyes are so indifferent, it always hurts my heart.

Knowing the truth, I decided to ask him for clarification. I was really too stupid to ask him.

I just remember him looking at me with cold eyes and saying:

"You are just a dog I raise, you should do whatever I ask you to do."

In addition to sadness, there is also deep fear, I hate him, why is he tied to me in the name of my father, and I am also afraid that he will continue to manipulate me, I want to escape.But I found that it was useless at all. After I escaped and was arrested, there will always be people around me watching me.Since then, there are only people watching me by my side, and no one can approach me, because those who approach me are either killed or killed.

These people were driven away, and from now on, I was firmly controlled by him and became a real puppet.

I have no relatives, no friends, I have no thoughts, I cannot find myself alive.

I thought I was dead, but when I met him, I found that I was alive, and the man approached me and said:

"Brother, I'm Xia Yan Siyi, can I make friends with Xiongtai?" I kept looking at him, not daring to answer him, I didn't even know what to do.It wasn't until he left that I dared to say "good" softly.

I thought it was over like this, but I didn't expect that I still met him. Those people didn't object to his approaching. When I get close, I feel that I am alive, because my heart beats, and his every frown and smile are like colors, making my world so beautiful.I can't help wanting to be with him forever.

He seems to think the same way. I am really happy when I am with him. It turns out that life is so beautiful.

But 'Father' appeared, and he let me know where is the Tibetan Knife from Siyi?I disobeyed his order for the first time, but the result of disobeying his order was too horrible. He wanted to be insulted by others, but I couldn't do anything.

Disobeying the order this time almost made me lose Siyi from now on. I didn't dare anymore. When I watched Siyi draw his sword and kill himself, I really wanted to die with him like this.

Fortunately, Siyi was rescued in time.

Since then, I have obeyed his orders and never dared to resist them again.

They have always had a mysterious purpose, they want to know the Tibetan knife from Siyi, so as to achieve their purpose.Every time I try my best to protect Siyi, but my strength is so small that I can't shake them at all.I can't be too passive, if it's just me, then it's no big deal to be manipulated by them for a lifetime, but I have Siyi, I can't let Siyi be manipulated by them together with me.

From then on, I started to cultivate my influence under their noses, but these people are so powerful, my affairs are all seen by them, they are just a finger, destroying the influence I have cultivated so hard, I I thought I was going to die, but they didn’t want to kill me. I found out later that they wanted to know the secrets of Siyi through me, but Siyi didn’t know anything. In the end, their plan failed and they wanted to kill Siyi , because this problem was caused by Siyi, I begged bitterly and took the poison that made my life worse than death, but I still only got one chance, a chance to save Siyi.They dropped a poison called Bone Corrosion Grass on Siyi. I exhausted all my strength, and finally asked the ghost doctor. After I exhausted everything, I got him to treat Siyi. .

But even if the ghost doctor takes action, the truth is that he can only suppress the poison on his body.

He had to take the antidote of bone erosion grass before he could get better.

I really have no choice, I thought my Siyi would die, but Fu Hongtao came, and he gave me the antidote, but the antidote was only effective for one month, and after one month, I had to take it from him again. antidote.He really controlled me firmly in his hands, but why should I feel the same pain as me.

Can't I resist?No!I must resist, I mean he can't be controlled by him for a lifetime.

From now on, I still deal with him while continuing to cultivate my influence. I know that Fu Hongtao has an antidote, as long as I kill Fu Hongtao, or just keep him in check, I can get the antidote.

My right hand has been disabled. In order not to let Siyi see it, I never use my right hand in front of him. In order to restore my skills to what it was before, I practiced day and night, and finally got away with it. My hair is easy to grow. White hair, I am also afraid that Siyi will know, so I always try to dye my hair black.

I planned step by step and carefully cultivated my influence. After more than 20 years, I finally gained a little confidence under the eyes of these people. As long as I give me a little time, I can let my thoughts be free from now on up.

But those people couldn't wait any longer, they seemed to have discovered my purpose, they actually abolished Siyi's martial arts, and at that time I was sent to a place by them.

I came back from a narrow escape, covered in injuries, but I still wanted to see Siyi, so I endured the pain, changed my clothes, and went to see Siyi, but saw the scene that I couldn’t face, my Siyi I was still bullied by these people, and my martial arts were abolished. At that moment, my eyes were full of ridicule, mocking myself for being too incompetent, and I found that I still couldn't protect Siyi, I couldn't protect my Siyi.

They no longer give me the antidote to save Siyi, no matter what I do, it will be useless, and the poison in my body will no longer be suppressed by me, they will not kill us even though we are in pain.

Seeing that Siyi's body is getting weaker and weaker, even if I speed up the measures, it is too late, I don't know what to do, I don't even dare to look at Siyi, should I not resist at the beginning, let them manipulate Our lifetime is fine, at least we are all alive.

Just when Siyi couldn't hold on any longer, he still appeared. He said that he had medicine that could alleviate the poison on Siyi, but the condition was that he asked me never to appear in front of Siyi again, so that he and Siyi could be fulfilled. .

Although I knew that I couldn't be with Siyi, but after hearing his words, I still felt the pain, the pain that even the poison on my body couldn't bring me, I really wanted to refuse, but I had no choice, Siyi Time is running out, and I don't yet have the ability to get the antidote.At that time, my heart felt like a knife was twisted. It turned out that the pain in the world was already painful.

I agreed to let him take Siyi away, and at the same time started the final plan. I will get the antidote. With my ability, the way to get the antidote is to die with them. I planned it 20 years ago. After dying with them, my subordinates will find the antidote and send it to Siyi. From then on, Siyi will have a healthy body and no one will manipulate his life.

From the time I had a plan, I knew that I couldn't let Siyi know that I love him, so I never said I love him, but I really wanted to say to him "I love you, I love you, I love you... ..."

I want to say it every day, every moment, but I can't.I mean he is really persistent, he is exactly the same as me, if you fall in love with someone, you will love to the extreme, if you love someone, you will give him everything, he is really like me.

How much I want to give up everything to be with him, but I can't, I can't let him be manipulated like me for the rest of his life.In my opinion, he should soar in the sky, he still has a long life, I want him to live well, and live back for my share.

Everything was planned, but Ke Siyi didn't want to wait for me to get the antidote, so she left me early.

At that moment, I didn't know what I did all this for. My persistence for so many years was so ridiculous.

I hugged his corpse and knelt in front of the ghost doctor's door for three days and three nights. The cold ice and snow were not one ten thousandth as cold as my heart.

In the end I believed my meaning had left me.

I really love you, Siyi, why did God take you away? I have nothing, I only have you, but now I don’t even have you.The world is so big and the world is so vast, why can't it accommodate the two of us!

Maybe you haven't met me, you won't be so painful, so my meaning, don't meet me again, even if you meet me, don't love me again, you know?

I didn't expect that I could see Siyi again, but my Siyi, after listening to my words, decided to forget me, so many people, so many things, he forgot me alone!Forget it!Forget it!If you forget, you will not be sad or hurt because of me.

Beside the Wangchuan River, you asked me, "Who are you!" I also grow old overnight for you.I didn't shed tears, because I have forgotten what tears are, as long as you are well, I mean,

I will spend the last moment of my life for you, hoping to successfully protect you, and I will stop those who chase and kill you behind you.

What I mean is, it's best to forget me, if you don't forget me, you will be sad again!

Sorry, I still can't say I love you!

The author has something to say: Brother Fu's inner monologue, I feel that it is not well written, but I don't know how to change it!