my boyfriend is too random

That night, Ding Zimu slept in Yang Yiming's bedroom, leaning against Yang Yiming's side, and he slept soundly.Listening to his breathing in the darkness, Yang Yiming knocked steadily into his heart.He stroked Ding Zimu's hair lightly, and his fingertips felt numb, and the feeling was aching in his heart.He could understand Ding Zimu's mood. Sometimes he felt that he and Ermu were committing a crime, a murder, and the other party had no power to fight back.Even if he understands rationally that this is actually "curing the disease and saving the patient" and helping Ding Zimu, and understands that all this is inevitable, it does not make him feel better.Because he can almost deduce what kind of path Ding will choose, and they can only accept it.

This is actually the best result. For a psychological counselor, this can be called perfect.

Yang Yiming sighed slightly. He felt that although he had the title of a "professional psychological counselor", everything he did was "purely amateur", and even an amateur counselor would not be a "subpersonal" Feel guilty about disappearing, let alone indulge yourself and the patient step by step to today.

Late at night.

Ding Zimu heard someone calling him in a trance in his sleep, his tone was sharp and harsh.As the call grew louder, he felt that the long-lost headache came again, and it gradually got worse.

"Who?" Ding Zimu tried his best to endure a burst of throbbing pain, and asked with some sanity. He opened his eyes wide and wanted to see the road in front of him clearly through the thick darkness.In a daze, he himself didn't quite understand how he got here, he just felt that the calls made him more and more upset.

"Mumu," said the stern voice, "come here! Immediately!"

Ding Zimu walked forward slowly following the direction of the sound, hearing the howling cold wind, after all, it was winter, he tugged on his clothes, feeling a bit cold.As he walked, the darkness in front of his eyes seemed to gradually fade away. He could vaguely see the outlines of buildings, the dilapidated and low eaves, the collapsed courtyard walls, and the grass half a person's height, as well as a piece of grass in the grass. A passing stray dog.

"This is my house," Ding Zimu murmured, "I'm here again." He lightly pressed his palm on the door, the rough feeling was so familiar, he narrowed his eyes slightly, feeling that the headache was quickly dissipating, But what followed was that my brain gradually went blank.It feels very familiar, like a beach with the tide receding, leaving only a flat sand surface, on which the imprints once disappeared.

Ding Zimu frowned and tried to remember, he felt that he was chasing a shadow in vain.But soon, even this feeling of "I seem to have forgotten something" faded in my brain, replaced by a solid and warm feeling.

"I'm back." He whispered again.

"Then hurry up and come in." A calm and heavy voice came from a closed door.Ding Zimu obediently opened the door gently, and stepped in with one step.The light in the yard hurt his eyes, he closed them suddenly, and opened them slowly after a while.Simple but neat little yard, the terrazzo floor on the floor has been cracked and raised everywhere, but it was wiped clean; walking into the house, the bed was covered with flat sheets, the quilt was neatly folded, and pillows Put together on the corner of the bed.There are still wet water stains on the cement floor, just as clean as if I wiped it by myself in the past.

There was an aroma in the air, Ding Zimu sniffled, it was the rich smell of braised beef.He couldn't help laughing: "Brother Zheng, where are you?"

"Kitchen." Zheng Ge's voice came out, and soon a man came out of the small kitchen. He was tall and tall, and the small broken wooden door of the kitchen seemed like a decoration.

Ding Zimu happily walked over, slipped around Brother Zheng and slipped into the kitchen.The glass in the small kitchen was broken, and was simply pasted up with plastic sheeting. The room was full of hot steam. Although the kitchen wall was broken, there was not much oily smoke. A pot of beef was stewed on the old gas stove. , making a puffing sound, and the aroma is coming.

Ding Zimu unceremoniously picked up a piece of beef with his chopsticks and put it in his mouth, but for some reason, he felt that the beef didn't taste good, at least it didn't smell that good.

"You still know you're back?" Brother Zheng said with a straight face, "What time is it?"

"It's not too late, it's time for dinner." Ding Zimu said with a smile, and put down the chopsticks in his hand, "Shall we serve dinner now?"

"No, forget it if you starve to death." Zheng Ge said angrily, but he turned and went into the kitchen, took out two sets of bowls and chopsticks from the dilapidated cupboard, "Hurry up and set up the table, wait for me to serve you ?”

Ding Zimu ran into the house and took out a small table and set it up in the yard. It was quite cool in the evening, so it was more comfortable to eat in the yard.

"Brother Zheng, when did you come back from a business trip?" Ding Zimu didn't know why he blurted out such a sentence, but after asking, he felt that it was a matter of course. Didn't Brother Zheng just say he was going on a business trip not long ago?

"A few days ago. As soon as I came back, I found that you were so wild that I couldn't even see you." Zheng Ge still had a straight face.

"I went to work." Ding Zimu said with a smile, "I work part-time in an amusement park. It's a holiday now, and the business is good."

"Work hard," Zheng Ge said, "You are not young anymore, you should save some money for the future."

"In the future, I have already thought about the future. I want to save money to open a cake shop."

"It doesn't matter what you drive, you have to have your own plan anyway." Zheng Ge paused, "Also, although it is said that you start a business first and then start a family, you can't be too step-by-step, find a girlfriend first and talk, and the two of you together Hard work is also the cultivation of feelings, isn't it?"

"Brother, you're still single, okay?" Ding Zimu sighed, "It's hard for me to understand your mentality of wanting to pack me up and give it away."

"I'm afraid you won't be able to sell it if you smash your hands." Zheng Ge knocked on the table and said, "Don't talk to me, just be serious."

"Girlfriend..." Ding Zimu froze for a moment after saying these three words, feeling that this topic was a bit strange in a trance.It was just that moment when he suddenly realized that something was wrong with the whole thing.

"What are you doing in a daze, eat." Brother Zheng knocked on the bowl again, "Go to bed early after eating, look at your face, it's so ugly. Haven't you had a good rest recently?"

"Fortunately..." Ding Zimu replied absent-mindedly, frowning slightly, wondering what is wrong.

"What's okay, I don't think it's good at all. Ding Zimu, how many times have I told you, why don't you always listen to advice? Work and rest should be combined with work and rest, and you can't just do it blindly. Besides, you You should pay attention to your body, look at you, you have lost weight recently, when I came here there was only drinks in the refrigerator, you are a fish? You live by drinking water?"

"Brother Zheng, fish don't drink water."

"Shut up, listen to me." Brother Zheng scolded in a low voice, "Didn't Teacher Feng say he wanted to introduce you to a girlfriend last time, and don't you have a girlfriend named Luo Yang?"

"Luo Yang is not my girlfriend."

"It's not that you don't know how to chase."

"Luo Yang..." Ding Zimu stopped, he had an intuition that he couldn't pursue Luo Yang, but he couldn't tell why, probably because he was too familiar.Ding Zimu was upset, and his mind was getting more and more confused. He put down the bowl and chopsticks, stood up, and walked around the small yard: "I, I'm going to wash my hands." Ding Zimu muttered, walked into the kitchen to twist Turning on the faucet, the sound of splashing water blocked Brother Zheng's voice, and he felt a little quieter in his heart.

The water was very cold, and it was very comfortable to wash in his hands. Ding Zimu took a long breath, thinking uncontrollably, this is the best thing about living in a bungalow, and the groundwater is used, and it is very cold and super comfortable in summer...

summer?

Ding Zimu was stunned for a moment, then subconsciously raised his head to look at the sky outside the window, it was blue and blue without a trace of cloud.It seems to have been blown by the cold winter wind, leaving only pure blue.A tuft of decaying grass grew on the eaves, and the scorched and withered branches and leaves pointed straight at the sky.

Ding Zimu was stunned for a while looking at the clump of decayed grass, and endless sorrow slowly came to his heart.

"Mumu, hurry up and eat." Brother Zheng shouted from outside the kitchen.

Ding Zimu walked out shaking the water in his hands, feeling his fingers were cold.He looked down at Brother Zheng sitting on the small bench: "Brother Zheng, what month is it today?"

Brother Zheng put down the bowl in his hand, and Ding Zimu suddenly found that he could no longer smell the strong smell of braised beef that had been lingering in his nose.

"August." Brother Zheng was expressionless.

"January." Ding Zimu looked up at the sky, it was still blue and blue, but a cold wind suddenly blew up, and a burst of heat rose from the small dining table. Soon, a thin layer of fat condensed on the surface of the braised beef.

"..."

"Brother Zheng, it's January now. I've left the amusement park, and I've been out of here for a long time, there's no way there's a drink in the fridge...in fact, there's probably no fridge at all. And the braised beef isn't good at all Eating...a lot of things have changed."

"What do you want to become?" Zheng Ge stood up slowly.

Ding Zimu's eyes moved up slowly with him until he was level with him.Ding Zimu was very surprised. In his impression, Zheng Ge had always been taller than himself, but now it seemed that the two were of the same height.Ding Zimu said: "The current state is very good, I'm talking about the realistic state."

As soon as these words were uttered, Ding Zimu felt a blur in front of his eyes, and everything changed rapidly. The small dining table was gone, weeds were overgrown on the terrazzo floor, dead grass was strewn on the courtyard wall, and rotten leaves and dead branches were piled up under the base of the wall. There is some dirty household rubbish.

"Is that so?" Brother Zheng asked coldly, "Very good?"

"That's it." Ding Zimu looked around slowly, and countless pictures in his brain flashed across like quickly edited film, Yuan Qiao, Xu Zhujun, Song Zhi, Xiaoyun... and Yang Yiming.

"This place is completely deserted, abandoned, useless. Chances are, it'll be bulldozed tomorrow, leaving only a pile of rubble. But I have no regrets, it was never My home, I never want to stay in this ghostly place forever." Ding Zimu paused, and then said, "Brother Zheng, I have already made my decision and I will not change it. I am 22, not an ignorant child, I actually understand this social reality better than most of my peers, you know how I grew up, I know what I'm doing."

Brother Zheng turned pale with anger: "You know what a fart. Have you eaten what I tell you every day? Why can't you remember anything!"

"What... what did you say?" Ding Zimu was a little stunned. After asking, he suddenly remembered that he had indeed been dreaming about Brother Zheng all the time, and he couldn't remember what happened in the dream when he woke up vaguely, "Uh , sorry I forgot."

Brother Zheng tapped Ding Zimu's head vigorously with his fingers: "You idiot, can you be more sensible, you don't even know what's going on if you are sold out."

"Teacher Yang won't sell me."

"Fart!" Brother Zheng said angrily, "Do you really think he has nothing else to do?"

"Of course not," Ding Zimu shrugged, "He was plotting me."

"You..." Brother Zheng clenched his fists and held back his breath, then gritted his teeth and said, "Ding Zimu, let me tell you clearly again, listen carefully. First, Yang Yiming is definitely not that simple to you. What do you say he likes you? He can’t like your cooking, can he? Then find a cook and it’s over? Second, you are definitely not a bullshit “love” for Yang Yiming, you are just... just... just because you grew up Big, just such a person chased you, so you fell into it in a daze!"

Ding Zimu frowned.

"So, Mumu, listen to me. Think again, you can meet a better girl in the future, and you will understand what true love is. You are like this now... what is the difference between falling in love with a junior high school student ? Life and death at every turn, let alone three years, I wish we could break up in one semester."

"I'm not a junior high school student."

"Your emotional experience is not as good as that of a junior high school student!"

"Then..." Ding Zimu thought for a while, "Then let me practice dating as a first-year junior high school student. The first love partner is Yang Yiming. Brother Zheng, Yang Yiming is just my practice partner. If you are proficient in the practice, it depends on your mood whether you can shake him or not. How about it, do you think it is quite cool to think of it this way? There is a kind of pleasure of playing with others in the palm of your hand?"

Zheng Ge held back for a long time, and finally said: "Junior high school students are not allowed to fall in love, puppy love!"

Ding Zimu shrugged: "Then let me find a girl."

"you……"

Ding Zimu laughed, that kind of heartfelt, happy smile, he walked up to Brother Zheng and said, "Brother, you are worried about me, I know, but don't you think I am very capable now?"

"How can you do it?" Brother Zheng said with a straight face, "You are so stupid."

"Very well," Ding Zimu reached out to hold Brother Zheng's hand, "And don't worry, I will get better and better. I'm actually quite capable, really."

"What a fart." Zheng Ge still had a straight face, but his eyes narrowed slightly.

"The cakes I make are delicious, and I can also cook. They are especially delicious." Ding Zimu said, "It's even more delicious than yours."

"When did you learn to cook?"

"I have always been able to." Ding Zimu whispered, "Brother Zheng, you are too used to me, I never cook in front of you, even washing clothes can flood the yard, but in fact I really know how to cook. Can you let me alone? Let me try it alone, I can do well, if I do something wrong, tell me, I will slowly change... I... always learn to grow up alone. "

"You're still young."

"It's not too young, I'm 22." Ding Zimu shrugged, "It will take decades to go back, and I can be the father of the two children."

"Do you want children?"

"I don't want to." Ding Zimu said bluntly, "Although I don't hate children, I don't want children. I can't take good care of them, and I'm afraid that I won't be able to give them a good living environment in the future. Besides, in my world Here, he is the most important."

Brother Zheng didn't ask that "him", but just grabbed Ding Zimu's shoulder and remained silent for a while, then asked, "Where's Da Ding?"

"I don't know, I can only do my best, but this is not a double-choice question," Ding Zimu said firmly, "The right to choose is not in my hands."

"You like him very much?"

"I like it very much." Ding Zimu nodded vigorously, "I have never liked someone so much, and I don't want to lose him."

Brother Zheng was silent for a while, sighed a long time but didn't know what to say, he thought angrily, or should I break this stupid wooden leg, and then be locked in the room for the rest of my life?

Ding Zimu said softly: "Brother Zheng, if you don't ask..."

Brother Zheng raised his eyebrows.

Ding Zimu swallowed the second half of the sentence, he didn't know how to say it, no matter how he said it, it would hurt the other party.

Brother Zheng looked at Ding Zimu carefully, and grinned: "Do you think I should ask you, what will happen to me in the future?"

Ding Zimu gritted his teeth and nodded.

"I don't really care about that." Brother Zheng said, "You just have to be good. I don't want too much. How can I be alive? Besides, who hasn't died yet."

"Brother Zheng..."

"Okay, let's go, it's getting late." Brother Zheng sighed, regardless of whether it was "breaking his leg" or "locking him in a small dark room", it was just a thought, just like every father Everyone will have the urge to "kick this brat out of the house and never allow him to come back".

Zheng Ge gently pushed Ding Zimu, Ding Zimu felt staggered, his eyes blurred, and the whole world went dark.He blinked, and gradually he was able to see the outline of the bookcase in the darkness, the light coming in from the window, and the person sleeping beside him.Yang Yiming closed his eyes and breathed heavily. He put an arm around Ding Zimu's waist. Ding Zimu gently rubbed his face and buried his face in Yang Yiming's shoulder.

"Good night," he said softly, "I'll be fine."